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Dads want to change their babies' diapers. It's time society listens.

Do you know what's worse than babies with blowout diapers? Not having a safe place to change them.

The lack of changing stations is a struggle for moms as well, but I'm here to share the fatherhood side of the story. And as a dad with two young kids under the age of 5, I know this all too well.

I remember taking my 2-year-old daughter out to lunch while my wife and our oldest daughter enjoyed a mani-pedi day.

This particular establishment had a great kid's menu, and my daughter was enjoying herself immensely. But then it happened.

My non-potty trained 2-year-old looked up at me and said, "Daddy, I have poo-poo."

"No problem, I got this," I smiled. Off to the men's restroom we went.

No changing station in sight.

"Well, maybe they have a family restroom instead," I thought.

Nope, they didn't.

At that point, my kid was quite fragrant. I was about to call Terry Crews to handle the intense odor if I couldn't find a place to change her ASAP.

Terry knows how to handle odor. GIF via Old Spice.

Finally, I asked an employee if a changing station existed anywhere in the restaurant.

"Yes, we have one in the women's restroom," she replied.

"I need to change my daughter's diaper," I said. "Can I go in there (the women's restroom)?" She left to ask the manager, and instead of waiting, I just paid our bill and changed her in the backseat of my SUV.

This diaper crisis isn't new to fathers.

One celebrity dad ranted about it recently, and other everyday dads like me deal with this on a daily basis.

My thoughts during an interview on the lack of changing tables in men's restrooms. GIF from California Senate Democrats/YouTube.

We can do better.

Here are three simple reasons why we need to change the whole men's room diaper setup.

1. It's sexist.

First, let's identify the real enemy here.

If an establishment chooses not to have any changing stations in their restrooms, that's 100% fine by me. Although I'm a parent, I'm not naive enough to believe every business needs to be kid-friendly. Heck, when I have a rare "grown folks only" moment, there are places I enjoy visiting just because they don't cater to children.

The source of my ire stems from the businesses that consciously decide to add changing stations in women's restrooms but don't do the same in the men's restrooms.

We're not just talking about businesses that were built in the 1950s, either. Many of them are brand spanking new and still have no place for dads to change their kids' diapers. It sends the damaging message that it's women's work, and that couldn't be further from the truth.

Can you imagine what the meetings must've been like when the decisions were being made to put changing stations in women's restrooms only?

GIF from "The Tonight Show."

What about single dads? Gay dads? Dads who are out by themselves and have no choice but to change their babies on the grimy public restroom floor? This happens a lot.

Moms don't like it either. Nonsense like this sets them back 50 years. Enough is enough.

2. It's a really bad look for business owners.

Again, we're not talking about the businesses who unapologetically choose not to cater to children. We're talking about the ones like the restaurant I visited that had a kid's menu but no changing station available for dads to handle diaper business.

Don't be surprised if the government gets involved. It happened recently in California with the Potty Parity for Parents Act championed by state Sen. Ricardo Lara, a Democrat. The 2014 bill required a changing stations in men's restrooms if stations existed in adjacent women's restrooms. At the very least, family restrooms needed to be accessible to both men and women.

Seems like a no-brainer, right? The bill passed out of the General Assembly with a bipartisan vote of 56-8. There was even a big press conference with Lara and other parents discussing the importance of this legislation.

I gave my two cents to the audience about the importance of this legislation. Image courtesy Doyin Richards.

Sadly, California Gov. Jerry Brown vetoed the bill citing it as a "private sector" issue, disappointing many Californians in the process. For the sake of parental equality, hopefully other legislators will pick the ball up that Brown dropped.

And for those who believe this shouldn't be legislated, remember 25 years ago when people used to be able to do this on commercial airplanes?


Smoking on planes? That's not going to fly these days. GIF via "The Carol Burnett Show."

That looks like the craziest thing ever now, and if we relied on the private sector to solve the problem, you better believe people would still be lighting up at 30,000 feet today. Sometimes you have to legislate common sense in order for progress to occur.

3. This doesn't help create a world of good dads.

Good dads are going to change their kids' diapers no matter what obstacles are put in front of them. But why do these obstacles need to exist in the first place? In 2016 and beyond, doesn't it make sense for moms and dads to have places to do this? I've been known to call businesses ahead of time to ask if changing stations exist in men's restrooms before I take my kids there, and it's an unnecessary hassle.

With racism, poverty, global warming, and other important items to deal with, I'm sure there are some people who believe, "Aren't there bigger problems to focus on than changing stations in men's restrooms?"

Maybe.

But when a man's baby has a blowout diaper and there's no place to change said baby, there's no bigger problem in the world to him in that moment, I promise you.

Let's give a thumbs up to the businesses that understand that dads change diapers, too.


I'm always happy to see a changing table in men's restrooms. Image courtesy Doyin Richards.

Men who value fatherhood make the world a better place for everyone. We should make it easier for them, not harder.

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Meet the 18-year-old advocating for teen mental health, one inspiring podcast at a time

All images provided by Prudential Emerging Visionaries

Collins after being selected by Prudential Emerging Visionaries

True

A changemaker is anyone who takes creative action to solve an ongoing problem—be it in one’s own community or throughout the world.

And when it comes to creating positive change, enthusiasm and a fresh perspective can hold just as much power as years of experience. That’s why, every year, Prudential Emerging Visionaries celebrates young people for their innovative solutions to financial and societal challenges in their communities.

This national program awards 25 young leaders (ages 14-18) up to $15,000 to devote to their passion projects. Additionally, winners receive a trip to Prudential’s headquarters in Newark, New Jersey, where they receive coaching, skills development, and networking opportunities with mentors to help take their innovative solutions to the next level.

For 18-year-old Sydnie Collins, one of the 2023 winners, this meant being able to take her podcast, “Perfect Timing,” to the next level.

Since 2020, the Maryland-based teen has provided a safe platform that promotes youth positivity by giving young people the space to celebrate their achievements and combat mental health stigmas. The idea came during the height of Covid-19, when Collins recalled social media “becoming a dark space flooded with news,” which greatly affected her own anxiety and depression.

Knowing that she couldn’t be the only one feeling this way, “Perfect Timing” seemed like a valuable way to give back to her community. Over the course of 109 episodes, Collins has interviewed a wide range of guests—from other young influencers to celebrities, from innovators to nonprofit leaders—all to remind Gen Z that “their dreams are tangible.”

That mission statement has since evolved beyond creating inspiring content and has expanded to hosting events and speaking publicly at summits and workshops. One of Collins’ favorite moments so far has been raising $7,000 to take 200 underserved girls to see “The Little Mermaid” on its opening weekend, to “let them know they are enough” and that there’s an “older sister” in their corner.

Of course, as with most new projects, funding for “Perfect Timing” has come entirely out of Collins’ pocket. Thankfully, the funding she earned from being selected as a Prudential Emerging Visionary is going toward upgraded recording equipment, the support of expert producers, and skill-building classes to help her become a better host and public speaker. She’ll even be able to lease an office space that allows for a live audience.

Plus, after meeting with the 24 other Prudential Emerging Visionaries and her Prudential employee coach, who is helping her develop specific action steps to connect with her target audience, Collins has more confidence in a “grander path” for her work.

“I learned that my network could extend to multiple spaces beyond my realm of podcasting and journalism when industry leaders are willing to share their expertise, time, and financial support,” she told Upworthy. “It only takes one person to change, and two people to expand that change.”

Prudential Emerging Visionaries is currently seeking applicants for 2024. Winners may receive up to $15,000 in awards and an all-expenses-paid trip to Prudential’s headquarters with a parent or guardian, as well as ongoing coaching and skills development to grow their projects.

If you or someone you know between the ages of 14 -18 not only displays a bold vision for the future but is taking action to bring that vision to life, click here to learn more. Applications are due by Nov. 2, 2023.
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