If you’re familiar with comedian Pete Holmes, you probably know he’s not afraid to go deep. He’s seemingly on a constant journey of self-improvement—physically, mentally, and spiritually—and his work as a stand-up comic, author, and podcaster reflects that with relatable, honest humor.
He recently appeared on Dan Harris’ podcast 10% Happier, where he discussed a simple three-word phrase that he claims helped change the way he views life.
Harris asked about his mantra, “Yes, yes, thank you.” Holmes gently corrected him, noting that it’s only three words: “It’s ‘yes, thank you.’” He then explained the concept: “I’ve heard really good teachers say that if you can really just say ‘yes’ to what ‘is,’ that’s all you need.”
Holmes went on to explain how it works:
“It just really short-circuits your brain if you say ‘Yes, thank you’ to it. And I mean almost instantly. Flight is delayed. ‘Yes. Thank you.’ It’s so weird. That’s why it works. Everything—attraction and aversion—right? So aversion is just charging it with all this push, like a basketball underwater. You’re giving it all the energy. When you just ‘Yeah’ as if it’s what you wanted.”
He gives an example:
“And then you realize you’re in an airport. You’ll be in an hour later. It can just be a clean breath and a recognition that you’re alive. Maybe you see the sun coming through the window. And maybe you remember that people used to die in covered wagons on the journey you’re about to take in four hours.”
Holmes explained that the concept is quite simple:
“But it can really be way less than that. Really, not debating with the bad feeling—just saying ‘Yes, thank you’ to it. That’s been one of the most powerful things in my life.”
10 percent happier
The clip was part of a larger discussion on the aforementioned podcast, with Holmes and Harris delving into faith, meditation, awareness, and how we learn to accept what is given to us.
Harris asked, “So the nature of existence is love because love is acceptance?” Holmes answered, “Even if you’re resisting it, what you’re resisting has already been welcomed into awareness.”
Stoicism
Much of what Holmes is describing is steeped in Stoic philosophy.
Former Roman emperor Marcus Aurelius wrote in Meditations, “And with that in mind I have no right, as a part, to complain about what is assigned me by the whole. Because what benefits the whole can’t harm the parts, and the whole does nothing that doesn’t benefit it.”
According to a site supporting Benny Voncken’s Via Stoica podcast:
“Gratitude in Stoicism is not a mood but a moral stance, an expression of understanding that everything is given for a time, and that everything that happens can serve the good of the whole. When you practice gratitude, you move closer to what the Stoics called eudaimonia, a good spirit, a flourishing soul. You see life as it truly is: transient, interwoven, and deeply precious.”
