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Mom wants to know when Halloween became 'an adult pub crawl'?

"Have parents always done this, and they're just being more public about it now?”

Celeste Yvonne had a recent Halloween realization.

Celeste Yvonne, a certified recovery coach and a founding host of the Sober Mom Squad, had a Halloween realization and wanted to know if she was the only person who felt the same.

“This morning, I'm listening to parents at the school drop-off area talk about how they will be bringing a keg onto their golf carts when they do the trick-or-treating rounds with their kids this year,” Yvonne says in a viral TikTok video.

“I'm not shaming them, but my question is: when did trick-or-treating become a beer crawl or pub crawl for adults?” she asked. “This is a newer phenomenon, isn't it? Or have parents always done this, and they're just being more public about it now?”


“I mean, even now, you can go up to a house doorway, and they will have candy for the kids or adult drinks for the adults. I never saw that growing up trick-or-treating,” Yvonne added. “Is this a newer phenomenon as a result of mommy wine culture or just the normalization of alcohol in general?”

@theultimatemomchallenge

#mommywineculture #halloween

The answer could be that drinking is a lot more visible during the holiday because the number of adults who celebrate is on the rise. At the same time, there has been a rise in alcohol consumption among older adults, where we now drink about the same amount as we did in the pre-Civil War era.

Interestingly, at the same time, there has been a decline in drinking among younger people.

In the comments, many noted that we didn’t see parents drinking during trick-or-treating in the past because kids used to go out with their older friends or siblings. “In the ‘80s, our parents let us go on our own. They stayed home and did what they wanted or at least in my town,” Leigh Winchester Fle wrote. “Gen Xer here, my boomer parents just sent us out and stayed behind and boozed. Now I think our generation tags along and take roadies,” Uncle Rico added.

Considering the fact that we're in the middle of a global pandemic that is particularly uncontrolled in the U.S., this year's Halloween was certainly unusual. Many families and communities skipped trick-or-treating in favor of alternative fun and festivity. Those who did trick-or-treat often had altered methods, from candy chutes to keep social distance to leaving bags of candy out on a table for the kiddos.

For the Thomas family in Atlanta, Georgia, this Halloween was particularly unusual. Courtney Thomas shared a post on Facebook saying that she had put out a sign on Halloween explaining that their household had a child with cancer, so they wouldn't be giving out candy. Their neighborhood usually gets a lot of trick-or-treaters and she didn't want kids to come to their door and be disappointed.

"Cool costume!" the sign read. "Sorry, no candy, child with cancer. See you next year! Have fun!"

But what Thomas found left beneath the sign left her in tears.


She wrote:

"I can't stop crying ❤️😭😭😭❤️

If anyone thought there was no hope in our kids and teens you're wrong. The SOLE purpose of us putting this sign in our yard today was so kids wouldn't run to our door and be disappointed (our neighborhood usually gets 300-400 kids).

I looked on our doorbell camera tonight and saw that kids had been stopping at the sign. T.j. Thomas and I just went outside and found this 😭😭😭

The picture doesn't do it justice, it's a LOT and the good stuff even 😜

Seriously... If the parents of anyone who did this sees this, PLEASE tell them how much it means to us and our kiddos. On the best candy night of the year kids freely and generously shared with strangers and showed so much love and kindness. So amazing ❤️"

Oh, man. Instead of just walking away from a house where they weren't going to get any candy, kids and teens left pieces of their own Halloween candy stash for the family. That's just beautifully sigh-worthy.

People loved the post, which has been shared more than 367,000 times in two days. Thousands of comments have poured in as well, with people offering prayers and good wishes to the Thomas family as well as gratitude for sharing a story that highlights the good in people.

Thomas also shared information about childhood cancer with links to organizations and fundraising efforts people can support:

"Childhood cancer is something we wish no family ever had to endure, but there is so much love, hope, and support!

If anyone feels led to support financially, this is the link to post directly to Children's Healthcare of Atlanta Aflac Cancer & Blood Disorders Center, https://give.choa.org/.../Donation2;jsessionid=00000000...

Users can select Aflac Cancer and Blood Disorders Center under "Direct my gift to:." All funds go directly back to the patients and family needs during their stay on the units!

Also, these are 2 AMAZING groups we know of and are so thankful for (they provide meals weekly for families inpatient, provide family emergency funds, raise awareness and fundraise for pediatric specific cancer research, and so much more!):

https://curechildhoodcancer.org/ways-to-give/

https://rallyfoundation.org/"

According to the American Childhood Cancer Organization, an estimated 15,970 kids ages 0 to 19 are diagnosed with cancer each year in the U.S. Cancer is a diagnosis no parent or child wants to receive, but it's especially worrisome during our novel virus pandemic, as it puts kids at higher risk of developing complications if they come down with COVID-19. The Thomas family was wise to take extra precautions to keep their child safe, and to see the kids of the community spontaneously support them by volunteering some of their own candy stash—even the good stuff—is heartening to see.

While there is plenty to challenge our faith in humanity right now, there are also countless stories like this one that illustrate the generosity and kindness ordinary people can—and so often do—offer one another. Thank you, Thomas family, for the timely reminder.

Note: this article was originally published November 1, 2017

Last Halloween, Donald Trump Jr. tweeted a picture of his daughter Chloe dressed up for Halloween.

"I'm going to take half of Chloe's candy tonight & give it to some kid who sat at home," the president's son wrote in the tweet. "It's never to early to teach her about socialism."


Yikes. (And to think — didn't Trump Jr. learn his lesson the last time he tweeted about candy?)

Trump Jr.'s tweet backfired. Fast.

Trump's tweet ignores about a million factors to consider when comparing the politics of trick-or-treating to socialism (I can't believe I just had to write that sentence). Much of the internet was happy to inform Jr. what exactly his tweet got wrong.

For starters, just ... why? Why take a completely innocent thing like trick-or-treating and make it "ugly and divisive"?  

J.K. Rowling pointed out the Trumps probably aren't the best people to be criticizing free handouts.

Others used the tweet to point out Trump Jr.'s hypocrisy on other issues, like his father's tax plan.

Keith Olberman was one of the many users who noted trick-or-treating, in and of itself, certainly isn't, um ... a capitalistic concept.

Senator Chris Murphy of Connecticut said what many of us were thinking in a simple six-word tweet. You can practically feel the facepalm through the screen.

But at the heart of the criticism aimed at Trump Jr. was his tweet's lack of empathy and compassion for others.

After all, most kids who don't trick-or-treat aren't staying in because they choose to.

My Upworthy colleague Eric March explained that, growing up, his parents did have him give away his candy to those less fortunate and, even as a kid, he "was happy about it."

When I asked Eric about his tweet, he told me he often shared his candy with local nursing homes (where his mom worked), gave it away in donation drives, or shared it with other kids at his Cub Scout meetings.

Not to mention, sharing is something we usually want to teach kids. Right?

There are plenty of lessons to be taught on Halloween. Selfishness isn't one of them.

Sharing your Halloween candy is something to feel good about — not frown upon.

There are many reasons kids don't go trick-or-treating: various disabilities, food allergies, illnesses, safety concerns (just to name a few). Halloween seems like an ideal time to teach kids about the privileges of trick-or-treating and encourage them to split up their bag of sweets with a classmate or neighbor who might not be able to venture out on Oct. 31. After all, selfishness is what's truly spooky this time of year.

For young kids, Halloween should be fun-scary. Not scary-scary.

While your child might do just fine with elaborate costumes, frightening yard displays, and stuffing their face with as much sugary candy as possible, there are many, many others for whom Halloween poses unique challenges.

In the U.S., 1 in 13 children have a serious food allergy, for example, and 1 in 68 have an autism spectrum disorder. And about 1 in 20 school-aged children in the U.S. have a significant physical or mental disability. It all starts to add up, and many of these issues may not be outwardly visible.


If you're hosting a Halloween party, putting up some last-minute decorations, or even just gearing up for trick-or-treaters, here's a few super simple things you can do to make this Halloween more inclusive, accessible, welcoming, and just generally awesome for every kid to participate in:

1. Fruity candies are great for everyone, but especially for kids with food allergies.

[rebelmouse-image 19532834 dam="1" original_size="5000x3333" caption="Photo by Foodie Factor/Pexels." expand=1]Photo by Foodie Factor/Pexels.

Peanut allergies get all the glory, but kids can be allergic to nearly anything. Common food allergies include peanuts, eggs, dairy, and gluten. Some families of candy, however, are safer bets than others.

Fruity candies, like Sour Patch Kids, gummy bears, Skittles, and Starburst, are a great thing to pass out for this very reason, but you can also find special kinds of chocolate made from hypoallergenic ingredients too.

There's nothing wrong with handing out Snickers, Twix, and the usual candy suspects, but if you're looking to offer some other options or want to pick just one kind of candy that pretty much anyone can enjoy, fruity candies are usually a safe bet.

2. Candy may be traditional, but nonedible treats are a good trick-or-treat option too.

In the case of severe allergies, it might be easier for some families to just avoid candy and sweets altogether — a potentially major bummer on a holiday almost entirely based around candy.

But there's a simple solution! Pick up some stickers, crayons, or other small nonedible treats (you can usually find them cheap, in bulk in the party supplies aisle) and offer those as trick-or-treating options alongside or instead of candy.

If you do this, consider putting a teal pumpkin outside your door or near the sidewalk. This signals to trick-or-treaters that you have non-edible treats to offer — letting everyone knows not to skip your house.

[rebelmouse-image 19532835 dam="1" original_size="3934x2623" caption="Photo via Food Allergy Research & Education." expand=1]Photo via Food Allergy Research & Education.

3. Having a party? Perhaps set aside a "quiet down room" to give kids a space to get away from the crowd.

A raucous Halloween party with movies and music blaring and kids running around can be overwhelming for anyone, especially young kids with anxiety or hypersensitivity issues.

Consider closing off a room in your house as a quiet and nonspooky zone where kids can just go to chill out. This might be a good place to have low-key crafts or just dimmed lights and a comfy place to sit.

For hyposensitive kids, on the other hand...

4. Offer a variety of hands-on Halloween games and activities that keep kids engaged.

Kids who are hyposensitive are understimulated by the world around them and may prefer tactile activities like sticking their hands in a bowl of peeled grapes to simulate eyeballs, for example.

Child psychologist Dawn Huebner recommends having some games available that aren't purely based on winning or losing too and activities where shy or anxious kids can help (i.e., by passing out supplies or keeping score) without fully participating if they aren't comfortable.

5. For kids who can't get up to your porch or front walkway, bring the candy to them.

If you have a porch or stoop with steps, it might be hard for some kids who use assistance devices (like wheelchairs or walkers) to come up and knock on the door. Consider sitting at the bottom close to the sidewalk or street and handing out candy during peak hours or leaving a bowl closer to the street if you can't be there in person.

You can even rent a ramp for the day, if you're so ... inclined.

6. Remember that costumes and dress-up aren't comfortable for everyone — try not to judge costumes at the door.

We've all seen the teenagers who come trick-or-treating and their "costume" is a paper bag over their heads, and we all know they're just in it for the free candy.

But try not to play costume police, especially with younger kids. After all, trick-or-treating shouldn't be a costume competition. Some kids with anxiety, sensory issues, or even just kids who are really shy might be more comfortable in something that looks, to you, like a half-hearted or lazy get-up. For them, it might be the only reason they were willing to leave the house.

A simple and heartfelt, "You look great!" will go a long way.

7. Have some dedicated "mask off" time.

This might be a little much. Photo by Thomas Roberts/Unsplash.

Super frightening or gory costumes can scare any kid, but Huebner says, "It can be hard to predict what's going to be frightening for a child," noting that often even silly or goofy masks can be very scary for certain kids.

Consider having some periods of mask off time to re-establish comfort.

"For kids who are more broadly afraid, being able to see 'This is a mask and it comes on and off and there's a person inside of it' can be reassuring," she says.

If you're really dedicated to a truly spooky halloween and don't want to take the mask off — see #3 "have a quiet room" above or consider putting a sign by your front walkway alerting parents that their kids might not enjoy trick-or-treating from you.

8. Other parents will definitely appreciate seeing a party agenda in advance.

There's really no way for you to prepare for every possible issue that might arise during a party, gathering, or haunted house, nor should you be expected to have a contingency plan for every single thing that might come up. No one knows kids better than their own parents though.

If you're worried that you might not have something on hand to make your party great for everyone, sending a party agenda in advance is a great way to give parents a chance to prepare their kids for what to expect.

"It works best if hosts are clear in invitations, so families can make decisions about whether they want to go," Huebner says. "Anxious kids, and really all kids, do really, really well with previewing. With being told in advance what's going to happen. It's still exciting, but it's less likely to be really terrifying in a way that isn't fun."

Halloween is a fun, spooky holiday, but it's more fun when everyone can participate.

Feeling a little bit spooked on All Hallows' Eve is great, but it shouldn't be traumatizing. Kids shouldn't be made to feel they're in real danger or that they're being left out of the fun. No one wants that.

Making your Halloween celebrations inclusive and welcoming to everyone doesn't mean doing away with any of your favorite Halloween traditions. All it takes is a little extra thought and some simple preparations to make sure everyone has as awesome time as you do.