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financial security

Aside from politics and religion, what is more polarizing than money?

A 2013 survey found that money is the #1 cause of stress in a relationship.

More so than in-laws or whose turn it is to do the dishes. In fact, arguing about money is easily the top predictor of divorce. Yipes.

But, a deeper understanding of how money works can affect our lives in many surprising ways.

Ways that go beyond just making more of it and can change our relationships for the better.

Jeffrey Dew, Ph.D., a professor at Utah State University, told Upworthy, "Financial literacy is important because it can help inform couples about how to handle their money on a day-to-day basis as well as inform their long-term financial goals."

Well said, Professor Dew. Now, here are five things everyone needs to know about money.

1. Proper planning will lessen your financial stress immensely.

Ahhhh yes! The sweet, soothing touch of financial literacy.

No surprise here! No couple wants to go through the doldrums of financial stress. BUT if you’re smart about your expenses and budget accordingly, there’s peace of mind and, well, peace in general.

One way to start is by signing up for a financial app to help you budget. There are a lot of options out there that let you integrate all your accounts, provide forecasts, and fast-track the stress-relieving process to get you looking like that baby owl in no time. You and your partner can review your accounts, set savings goals, and watch your progress together!

2. Talking about money actually brings you closer together.

A romantic getaway. A candlelit dinner. Fixing your finances.

Yes, all of these can strengthen your relationship. Taking the time to assess your financial situation together not only gives you a clearer idea of where you stand, it reinforces a crucial relationship dynamic — teamwork! By figuring out each of your strengths and weaknesses when it comes to managing money, you can build a solid foundation for working together that you'll use again and again throughout your relationship.

Let's never argue about money again! GIF from "Saturday Night Live."

Teams don’t go splurging on stuff in secret. Teams look out for the well-being of one another and do what’s best for the whole.

3. Understanding your finances will help you predict the future.

Oooohh! I see a comprehensive financial plan in your future.

Well, kind of. For couples, a financial plan is probably the closest thing to a real crystal ball. I mean, it can help both of you figure out exactly where you want to be in five, 10, 20, or 50 years if you want to!

The perfect house? The perfect car? All of it (plus more) can be yours for the incredibly low price of putting in the work and creating a solid plan that makes sense and keeps you on the path toward your goals.

4. Creating a budget will actually save you more time in the long run.

Time is money, money is time, and so on and so on. GIF via Vortex Anomaly.

Breaking down your finances will take time. It’s just a question of how much.

If you put in the work early, you save yourself from all the unnecessary hours rummaging through paperwork and dealing with collectors later on. That’s time you can spend going out, watching "Game of Thrones," or even actually spending your money on experiences and creating memories together.

Which leads me to my last point...

5. You can still treat yo selves, you know.

Aziz knows what's up — style-wise and money-wise.

OK, so this is pretty money-related, but it’s not about having more of it. It’s about understanding that you should enjoy the fruits of your labor.

The trick is finding the middle ground so you can still splurge, just smarter. When you’re efficient with your funds, you can find ways to buy the things you want and maximize every single cent.

Now go call your significant other! Tell them you love them, and tell them you have a plan to ease all your money-related stress.

We did it! We did it! GIF from "Seinfeld."

(Just don’t do it in an "I won the lottery!" kind of way.)

5 small steps to help you plan for life's surprises.

True

Here's the thing about time: We perceive it relative to our age.

The Washington Post dives into a theory originally put forth by Paul Janet in 1897: We perceive the first years of our lives to be much longer than the years that come later because our point of reference for time is smaller when we're younger.

When you've only lived four years, one year is a big chunk of time — it's 1/4 of your life!

But when you're 70, a year passes in the blink of an eye. So even though we all get the same 24 hours in every day, it goes by faster and faster as we get older.

That begs the question: What are we doing right now to set ourselves up for a life lived to its fullest as it increasingly seems filled up?

What do you want to look back on when you're 75? What decisions will make you proud? What's the life you want to have lived?

We can do our best to "plan" our lives, but often, even the best laid plans fall apart or evolve into something you couldn't even have imagined.

Still, there are basics we know we can't escape: Food, water, and shelter are things that we all have to plan and prepare for, regardless of where life's road takes us.

So, what can you do today to prepare for a life that you can only loosely predict? Here are five ways to think about it.

1. Money? Travel? Family? Figure out what success means to you.

What do you consider to be successful? It may be one thing or it may be a combination of things. Either way, defining what success means to you can help you identify what you'll need to achieve in order to believe you lived a "good" life.

2. Beyond "success," have a vision.

Once you know what makes you happy, build on that. Formulate an idea of where you'd like to be in 30 years so that you have a direction to start moving in. Money blogger, Finance Girl, puts it this way:

"Your vision should embody your values and your view of the future without being too generic. Your vision can also change over time. The point is to have one so you know why you're doing what you do, and you're happier doing it."

Having a vision doesn't mean things will work out exactly as you'd planned, but it empowers you to act with intention. To move forward each day, working toward this larger ideal.

3. Take responsibility for your choices. All of them.

Sure, there are a million factors beyond your control that affect your life every single day, but remember that you do play a part in what happens. Ayse Birsel, author of "Design the Life you Love: A Step-by-Step guide to Building a Meaningful Future," says "your choices will determine the kind of life you are designing." As such, they should map back to your vision. You have to own them.

4. Remain flexible. We can only control so much.

As you work toward your goal, be open to change. Don't hold onto things too tightly or life's turbulence will rock you.

Paul B. Brown, co-author of "Just Start: Take Action; Embrace Uncertainty and Create the Future" reminds us to learn each step of the way. He says, "Determine your desire. Take a small step toward it. Learn from taking that step. Take another step. Learn from that one."

Keep learning. Keep growing. Keep moving forward.

5. Unfortunately, the world does revolve around money. Be prepared.

Think about the things you can control, the factors you'll need to prepare for regardless of your life's ever-shifting trajectory. Money is one of them.

You can put the wheels in motion now so that you're not worrying about your finances at 75. You'll want to have everything as buttoned up as possible long before you're asking yourself where did the time go?

Not talking about money can seriously damage an otherwise healthy relationship.

True

Only a couple of years ago, the idea of sharing how much money you make with your colleagues or friends was one of those taboos that you just don’t mess with.

But recently, there’s been a huge conversation about getting those numbers out in the open.

When salaries are public, it helps everyone have more honest conversations about what they should be making. And it especially helps women and people of color, who tend to make less than their white male counterparts.

Yeah, you might want to talk if your partner carries their money around like this. Photo via 401(K) 2012/Flickr.

But when it comes to being that transparent with a romantic partner, it can seem even more tricky ... but why?

Despite the slowly turning tide in the professional world, there’s still a lot of stuff we keep to ourselves when it comes to money and our personal relationships.

For many couples, deciding how to split the check is the most involved money conversation they have regularly.

Not talking about money — or worse, lying about money — can seriously damage an otherwise healthy relationship.

Consider these facts:

About a quarter of American couples actively avoid talking about money. 31% of married people have lied to their spouse about money. And only 51% of couples talk about how they will manage their money before getting married.

That's huge!

How you feel when you talk with your partner about money. GIF via "Broad City."

Not talking about money — or worse, lying about money — can seriously damage an otherwise healthy relationship.

In fact, a 2013 study found that not being on the same page about money is the #1 predictor of divorce.

"It's not children, sex, in-laws or anything else. It's money — for both men and women," said Sonya Britt, who led the study.

This doesn't count as a conversation about money. GIF via "Parks and Recreation."

Britt and her colleagues studied 4,500 couples in different financial circumstances and found that money tension was a major factor in relationship dissatisfaction. Regardless of income level, amount of debt, or net worth, couples who didn't deal with their money issues were putting their marriages at risk.

On the other hand, research by TD Bank found that partners who talk about their finances openly and honestly tend to have happier relationships.

The bank polled 1,339 Americans who are in relationships and found that "among respondents who said they talk about money at least once per week, 42 percent described their relationship as 'extremely happy,' compared with 27 percent of those who talk about money less than once per month and 38 percent of all respondents."

The elephant in the room — whether it's consumer debt, incompatible spending habits, or a miscommunication about savings goals — is going to be there whether you acknowledge it or not.

That's why both financial and relationship experts say that talking about money is crucial for healthy partnerships.

Talk to your partner about your wishing-well budget. Photo via Paulo OrdovezaWikimedia Commons.

It's not a complete surprise that couples tend to put off conversations involving their finances.

You and your SO after a great money convo. GIF via tr1ppy-j/Tumblr.

Almost all of us have some hang-ups about money, whether that's shame about not making enough, fear of student debt catching up to us, or just your run-of-the-mill compulsive online shopping habit that you'd prefer to keep from your partner (other people have those, right?).

And that's OK!

The important part is that you and your partner work through those issues with openness, kindness, and patience.

(And maybe a bottle of wine. Totally optional, but I've found it helps with money convos with the significant other.)

From Your Site Articles

Money management doesn’t have to be a nightmare. Here are three quick ways to turn your finances around.

Work isn’t just a part of our lives, it’s one of the biggest parts.

Some people may only be obligated from 9 to 5, but with smartphones and evolving work cultures, we’re connected 24/7. A lot of us are logging over 70 hours each workweek because our phones enable us to take our work with us.

Jennifer J. Deal, Ph.D., author of "Always On, Never Done?" reports that remaining connected to work for so many hours each week leaves employees "only about 3 hours on workdays for 'discretionary' activities such as being with their family, exercising, showering, and all of those chores at home that someone has to do."

Only threehours per workday. We’re essentially never "off."

Despite working nearly nonstop, when payday rolls around, a lot of us can be left feeling like we'll never make enough.

GIF from "Finding Nemo."

Rent and mortgages, car payments, groceries, gas, nights out, pet emergencies, extracurriculars for the kids, family obligations — all of this takes a toll on our bank accounts.

It can feel like money is flying out of our accounts faster than it’s coming in. We’re working all the time but feeling like we’re just making it. We know we need to get a grip on our finances but have no idea where to start.

Here are three simple steps toward total financial domination.

1. Saving should be a part of the plan.

We hear it all the time: Save, save, save. Save for retirement. Save for emergencies. Save for travel. Figuring out how to save seems like it’s the holy grail, but how do we make that happen — especially if we feel like our money is already stretched too thin? The easiest first step is to, well, start with baby steps. Drink coffee at work or home instead of from a coffee shop, carry snacks and a reusable water bottle with you rather than buying them, come up with a quirky and fun challenge like saving all the $5 bills you accumulate, start a piggy bank — whatever is fun and doable for you.

2. Then, it all comes down to planning.

Don’t be afraid to budget. Yes, budget. It’s not a dirty word; it’s the way to freedom! Or at the very least the way to some financial flexibility. Take a look at how you’re spending money and figure out which items are needs versus wants.

Pro tip: Laura Shin, a Forbes personal finance writer, suggests keeping necessary expenses to less than 50% of your take-home pay.

Image view Tax Credits/Flickr.

Now, this isn’t always possible. Necessities are what they are, and for some of us, no amount of finagling can get them to that ideal amount.

Alan Dunn, founder of HowtoSaveMoney.com points out that, for some, "the sheer cost of survival may be very close to their total incomes." Still, it’s a pretty good benchmark to aim for, and having insight into your finances is step one on the road to financial security.

Now that you’ve begun to sort out the things you can’t live without, what about the things you want?

3. Give yourself an allowance! No, really.

Once you’ve broken down your finances into needs versus wants, build an allowance into your budget. Doing that gives you clear parameters — how much you can spend in a given pay period on things that aren’t necessities — and makes it easier to stay on track without feeling like you’re never able to treat yourself.

Make it easy for yourself to stay "on track." Image via Ben Sutherland/Flickr.

It's as simple as setting aside a fixed portion of what remains in your account after bills are taken care of. You may not be able to get everything you want at once — sometimes it’ll take a few months to put aside enough for a big purchase — but with planning, you can indulge a little.

Let's say, after all of your bills and savings are taken into account, you're able to spend $100 per month on anything your heart desires. You're dying to go to a music festival, but the tickets cost $175. It's not the end of the world! You don't have to forgo the festival, and you don't have to break your budget for the month — that would be a slippery slope. Put the $100 aside and wait until the following month when you'll have $200 at your disposal to get the tickets you want, guilt-free.

Payday might still suck…

Money will still leave your bank account at an astonishing rate that makes you believe Hogwarts is real, but you’ll feel more in control once you know where that money’s going and how to make it work for you.

Don’t feel guilty if you hit a few bumps in the road! We’re all navigating these murky money-management waters together.

8 student confessions that make me think differently about money — and merit.

Hard work does not equal financial security.

In March 2015, a group of Columbia University students created a Facebook page named Columbia University Class Confessions.

The group behind the Facebook page is known as First-Generation Low-Income Partnership, otherwise known as FLIP.

Their goal? To provide lower-income students at Columbia a space to voice their realities.

Their realities are pretty darn harrowing.

Before Columbia, Stanford had already launched a class confessions program a few years back:

After Columbia and Stanford launched their Facebook class confession pages in early 2015, other colleges followed suit.

Brown

Williams

There's a lot we can take away from these stories. They're intense; they're saddening. But here's one thing we should definitely note.

Hard work does not equal financial security. Social mobility isn't as easy as some might think.

When the Fight for 15 protests happened across the nation in favor of raising the minimum wage, one of the most common counterarguments was: "Why don't they just go get a college degree?"

Well, look at these college students working hard — to feed themselves, to get a roof over their heads, to get the medical assistance they need for depression or other health conditions, to support their struggling families back home. They went to go get that college degree that is supposed to help people out of poverty. They even worked hard enough to apply and get accepted into incredibly prestigious colleges, colleges that one would think would be the golden ticket to success.

And still, they're struggling. "Hard work" doesn't always give lower-income folks what they need to survive and fit into a world that's not made for them.

And the sad reality is that many lower-income people will still be struggling after graduation thanks to a weak economy — and a lot of debt.

From the Institute of College Access and Success: 69% of the Class of 2013 graduated college with an average of $28,400 in student debt.

Lower-income students clearly have more difficulty navigating things that others might take for granted — simply because they never had access to the resources some have always had — and don't know how to use them.

Check out more stories being read by students in this video below:

We all deserve the right to survive without struggle. These students show that hard work doesn't cancel out the obstacles that many lower-income folks face when trying to move up the socio-economic ladder.

Maybe their stories will help stop the unfair judgement of lower-income people and help others be more aware and understanding at the same time.

There are lots of types of inclusion. Here's one kind that's often overlooked.

True

Two words worth learning about: financial inclusion. What is it?

Well, let's talk about Constance.

Hi, Constance!

Lovely family you've got there.

For an animated character, Constance is really important. She represents the 2.5 billion people in the world who are not financially included. That means she doesn't have a bank account for her savings.

She doesn't have a payment service to transfer money.

Nor does have access to a secure loan.

For Constance — and those other 2.5 billion people — financial inclusion means having access to services that allow her to save money, make secure payments, and take out loans from a reliable, reputable source.

And one way that's now being achieved is through payment technologies: secure cards and mobile phones. Granted, these innovations are not going to solve everything, but they're empowering people like Constance to engage in society with more freedom and security.

But don't take my word for it. Here's Constance:

&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;span class="redactor-invisible-space"&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;/span&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;