upworthy

Skip Black Friday and shop discounts at these companies making a positive impact on the world

Michelle Gant
11.27.19
Courtesy of DoneGood

While Thanksgiving is meant to celebrate all we have to be grateful for, it's also the unofficial kick-off to the holiday shopping season. Last year, Americans spent about $1 trillion on gifts. What if we all used that purchasing power to support companies that reduce inequality, alleviate poverty, fight climate change, and help make the world better?

Between Black Friday and Cyber Monday, the coming days will have spending on everyone's brains. But in an effort to promote the companies doing good for the world, DoneGood founder Cullen Schwarz created Shop for Good Sunday (which falls on December 1 this year.)

Dubbed the "Alternate Black Friday," Shop for Good Sunday is dedicated to encouraging people to shop brands that do good for people and the planet. It also serves as a reminder to support local businesses making a positive impact in their communities.

While Shop for Good Sunday technically falls on a single day, this year, participating ethical and sustainable brands are running discounts for the whole week prior.

Where you invest your dollars matters, and there's great potential to put that money to good use if you know how. Check out these six brands that sell amazing products while also making a positive impact on the world. You'll not only be getting your loved ones meaningful gifts, but also making the world a brighter place along the way.

Isn't that what the holidays are really about?

Functional outdoor gear

Parque Rain Shell

Cotopaxi makes unique, sustainable outdoor gear, like this Parque rain shell, while keeping ethics at the core of its business model. The company gives 1% of its annual revenue to organizations that fight poverty and improve the human condition.

Modern furniture

Simbly Coffee Table

Simbly is a direct-to-consumer furniture company that sells modern, sustainable products built in the U.S. made of FSC-certified wood. And for every product sold, the company plants a tree.

Beautiful jewelry

Tho Bar & Geo Buffalo Horn Earrings

Hathorway is a jewelry company that handcrafts its accessories with materials like ethically-sourced up-cycled buffalo horns and handwoven rattan. Each item is designed and assembled in the U.S. with thoughtfully selected materials sourced from Vietnam, Thailand, and South Korea. A portion of the company's profit goes to initiatives that empower young, underprivileged women.

Luxe linens

Bamboo Charcoal Sheet Set

Ettitude crafts its home textiles from CleanBamboo fabric, a unique material made from 100% organic bamboo, the most resource-efficient plant on the planet. It also requires significantly less water to grow and produce than traditional cotton textiles. The products are also ethically made and come in packaging made from extra pieces of fabric.

Unique wood wares

The Charcuterie Board

Would Works creates and sells beautiful household wood products handcrafted by people experiencing homelessness or living in poverty. The company works with its artisans to provide job skills, financial literacy, and an income so they can reach their financial goals.

Empowering candles

She Inspires Candle

Prosperity Candle products are created by women refugees building a brighter future for themselves and their families. Each candle is made of soy-blend wax with essential oils hand poured in a well-designed container that is easily refilled or repurposed.

Find more of these great deals at DoneGood!

*Upworthy may earn a portion of sales revenue from purchases made through affiliate links on our site.

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Business

Stop struggling with awkward eye contact by using the 'Triangle Method'

This will make your next conversation a lot more comfortable.

via Canva/Photos

A woman staring a man in the eye.

Being good at making eye contact is a key factor in a successful social and professional life. It's a make-or-break skill because good eye contact can make you seem likable, while poor eye contact can make you appear shifty. "Eye contact produces a powerful, subconscious sense of connection that extends even to drawn or photographed eyes," according to Forbes.

Studies show that maintaining good eye contact conveys trust, empathy, and social connection. Difficulty maintaining eye contact can create discomfort, distrust, and disconnection. However, maintaining eye contact with others can be uncomfortable, especially for neurologically atypical people.

What is the Triangle Method for making eye contact?

That's where the "Triangle Method" comes in; it's a relaxed way to create the illusion of eye contact while gazing at a more comfortable spot on the other person's face. There are two versions of the Triangle Method: one for more formal, professional interactions and another for more relaxed, social conversations.

triangle method, woman's face, close-up woman, eye contact, professioanl eye contact. The Triangle Method for professional and personal interactions. via Canva/Photos

Here's how the Triangle Method works:

1. Make eye contact with the person you're speaking to by looking them in the eyes.

2. If this is a professional conversation, slightly lift your gaze to look at their brows. In a social setting, lower your gaze to look at their nose.

3. Return your gaze to their eyes.

4. Repeat this process throughout the conversation.

In other variations of the professional Triangle Method, you can look at the center of the forehead instead of the brows.

"When you're in a business situation, the area that you look at is the triangle that connects the forehead and the eyes," international etiquette expert Jacqueline Whitmore tells American Express. "That's what they call the business gaze."

handshake, eye contact, professional contact, job interview, men shaking hands Two men shaking hands.via Canva/Photos

Be sure to move your eyes slowly so they don't dart back and forth in a way that looks suspicious. The slight shift in your gaze as you move from the eyes to the brow line or nose tip probably won't be noticed by the person you're speaking to. It should look as if you're maintaining perfect eye contact, while giving yourself a break from holding an intense gaze.

How often should you make eye contact during a conversation?

People often wonder whether they're maintaining eye contact for too long or too short a time during a conversation. According to Magnet ABA Therapy, the best approach is the 50/70 rule. While speaking with someone, maintain eye contact 50% of the time. While listening to someone speak, hold eye contact for 70% of the time. Maintain eye contact for four to five seconds before slowly glancing away.

eye contact, woman and man, woman wine, wine man, lovers, lovers gaze, gaze into eyes A man and woman looking into each other's eyes.via Canva/Photos

When in conversation, it's essential to focus on what the other person is saying and how you can contribute, rather than worrying about whether you're making appropriate eye contact. The Triangle Method is a great way to help people who are uncomfortable with eye contact focus on what's most important: the other person, not just their eyes.

autism eye contactavoid eye contactconnectionconversationconversation tipsempathyeye contactgood conversation skillsprofessional communicationsocial connectiontalk to peopletriangle methodtrustcommunication tips
Education

3 easy, expert-proven tips on how to reset your social media algorithm and deliver joy

It might be time for a healthy reset.

Photo Credit: https://www.canva.com/photos

Two women look at their cell phones. One is pleased by her algorithm and the other is not.

As we enter a new year, many set resolutions to make it healthier, happier, and perhaps even more productive. Of course, there are often roadblocks (like actually getting that gym membership or throwing away those brownies). But one obstacle many social media users face is getting caught in doom-scrolling algorithms.

These can be tricky. Some of us get stuck in echo chambers, and while that can be innocuous, it can also seriously impact our state of mind.

But first, how do algorithms even work? In the piece "The algorithm effect: How social media decides what you see" on the WGEM site, Courtney Lewis, a professor of communications, explains, "The more things that you interact with, the more of that content is going to show up in your feed." She adds, "More of that creates the silos, and so when we like things and when we dislike things, the algorithm shows us more and more of the same."

algorithm, doom scrolling, social media, new year's resolution, life hack A person scrolls social media on their phone. Giphy Fun Scrolling GIF

Literally, every time we click, "thumbs up," or comment on a post, it's almost as if we're signing up for a rewards program. They only want to sell what they think you'll buy. Many people already know this. So the question now becomes: how do we reshape and reset for a happier existence?

In an article for Psychology Today, Lindsey Godwin, Ph.D., shares, "What we feed our brains matters. Not just online, but everywhere. If we want to change how we feel, how we think, and even how we show up in the world, the first place to start is often what—and who—we’re paying attention to."

Jake Peterson, senior technology editor at Lifehacker, adds, "Sometimes, our algorithm goes a little haywire. Perhaps you had a passing interest in a creator or subject, but now it's all over your feed. Maybe an accidental 'like' or share mistakenly taught the algorithm you're a fan of something you really are not, and now you're subjected to the topic with every other post (and advertisement, for that matter)."

Assuming you can't get off social media completely, experts have ideas on how to wipe the slate clean.

"AUDIT YOUR INPUT"

Godwin suggests taking a few minutes to look through the social media feeds you see the most. She writes, "What emotions does this content evoke in me? Does it leave me feeling energized, connected, inspired…or depleted and small?"

If it's the latter, simply unfollow those sites or pages.

"CURATE FOR CURIOSITY OR JOY"

Now that you've made a little space, it's time to bring in some healthier interaction. Again, Godwin asks that you reflect on what brings you joy. Is it otters dancing? Dogs and cats? Skateboarding tricks? Or maybe even certain bands you love hearing new music from. Recognize that and simply follow those social media accounts.

joy, algorithm, social media, reset, life hacks, dachshund, skateboarding A dog skateboards with ease. Giphy Hot Dog Dogs GIF

When looking at this, Godwin makes an interesting distinction: "Who inspires real, grounded hope, not just toxic positivity?" We often get stuck in mindless, sometimes even AI-generated meme scrolls. On the surface, they may seem helpful. But unsolicited, often banal platitudes can muddy our minds unnecessarily.

PHYSICALLY RESET CONTENT

Using Instagram as an example, Peterson explains how users can go into their Account Center and reset suggested content. After clicking your profile and the hamburger menu, you'll see "Content preferences."

Once you click "reset," it will ask, "Want a fresh start?" It then reiterates that resets can't be undone. Nor will it change your ad topics. But Peterson advises that these warnings shouldn't deter you: "Enjoy building a new algorithm, post by post—though if you find your suggested posts and reels lacking in the future, remember you can always return here to reset again."

Godwin also notes that our algorithms aren't always technological. What we change "offline" matters. She shares, "Be just as mindful about who and what you let shape your inner landscape offline as you are online. Sometimes the most powerful algorithm shift is as simple as spending an afternoon in nature instead of another two hours online."



doomscrollingalgorithmslife hackstechnologysocial mediainstagramresetnew yearpsychology todayfacebookalgorithm
Wellness
Joy

In 1998, Americans predicted what life in 2025 would look like. Here's how they scored overall.

Planet

'Florida girl' documents darkest day of the year in North Pole, Alaska, and people have questions

Family

A case worker was told she couldn't adopt a foster girl. She waited 6 years to make it happen.

Man tries to rescue stray kitten on the side of the road, then 12 more show up out of nowhere

"I got ambushed."

Photo credit: Canva

A man stopped to rescue a kitten and got way more than he bargained for.

The "cat distribution system" works in mysterious ways. The system refers to the phenomenon that cats seemingly "choose" their owners by appearing in people's lives at the right time, as if by some preordained fate. You'll find social media, which already favors cat-related content, awash with stories of folks who were magically bestowed with a feline friend…especially during kitten season, when there's an abundance of teeny tiny fur babies searching for a home.

That’s exactly what happened to Robert Brantley of Louisiana, except in his case, he got far more than he bargained for. This is a story of the cat distribution system on steroids.

Brantley was on his way to work and spotted a tiny white and gray kitten trying to get across the street. Like any kind human might, he stopped his car to bring the kitten to safety. In fact, he writes in an Instagram post, his wife had been wanting a cat for their farm so he figured he might as well rescue the little guy and bring him home.

But things got complicated as he was scooping up the little thing, when several more kitty cat siblings came running out of the nearby grass. Brantley writes that he was "ambushed by the mob."

Most adorable mob ever.

In all, Brantley counted 13 kittens. He had only planned on adopting one of them, but in the end, he couldn't bring himself to leave the others behind.

His kindness was much needed, too, considering humane societies and shelters are even more over-capacity in need of support from foster families during litter seasons, which starts in early spring and lasts throughout the summer.

In a follow-up video, Brantley's wife donned the cleaned up kitties in their Sunday best to have a photoshoot in her makeshift studio, in hopes that a purrfectly adorable picture would entice potential owners. One kitten could even be seen sporting a bow tie while the others climbed around the enclosure patiently awaiting their turn. Who could resist?

Since making his epic rescue, it looks like all the cats have been rescued, minus one, which they've named Scout.

But Brantley is still very much a "kitten wrangler" according to his Instagram.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

May more people take Brantley’s lead to foster the kittens or puppies they find if they have the means. Although, with kittens under 8 weeks old, it is advised to actually leave them be, if found outdoors, as it's likely their mother (who is their best caregiver) is nearby. In these circumstances, it's best to wait several hours, or even a full day, to see if the mother returns.

She could only be temporarily gone while searching for food, or even waiting for the humans to leave. One helpful tip from Alleycat.org: sprinkle flour near the kittens’ nest. If the mother cat returns, she will leave paw prints.

Of course, there are times when newborn kittens will in fact need to be taken in and looked after, during which they'll need "round-the-clock care to survive," according to Alleycat.org. If you find yourself in this situation, contact your local shelter to see if they participate in a Wait Until 8 program, which provides tools and instructions, like kitten care kits, to ensure a kitten’s caregiver has everything they need.

The cat distribution system might seems magical (and it is!), but it still requires real effort from us humans.

This article originally appeared two years ago. It has been updated.

Pets

Giggling siblings share the odd reality of 'grief humor' after losing their baby brother

Laughter is an unexpected, but not uncommon, response to loss.

Courtesy of @tofivefromthree/Instagram (used with permission)

Laughter in grief is more common than people might think.

If there's one thing that people who have experienced a tragic loss can agree on, it's that grief is weird. It's not predictable, it doesn't neatly follow specific stages, and until you've been through it, you never know how you are going to react. There's no timeframe for grief, and there are no rules for it, either.

In fact, sometimes a grief response can run completely counter to societal expectations, sometimes in ways that might feel irreverent or inappropriate from the outside. Case in point: A video of a group of young adult siblings who can't stop giggling as they share life updates with their dead younger brother.

The video was shared by Brittany and includes her siblings, Jessica and Tyler. (They also have another brother, Connor, who was not there for this video.) Brittany has been using social media as a "digital grief journal," sharing the wide range of feelings and experiences that have come along in her grief journey.

While laughter isn't often associated with loss, the siblings can't contain themselves as they talk to Daniel, the baby of the family, who died six months ago. The more they share, the funnier they find it.

Grief humor is more common than people might think

Odd? Perhaps. Common? Absolutely. Brittany tells Upworthy that she and her siblings cry a lot, but they also share fun stories about Daniel and use humor to cope. As people demonstrate in the comments, finding humor in grief is much more common than people think, and it's refreshing to see that truth not just acknowledged but embraced. Check out some of the responses:

"Two hours after my mom passed a scam call came in on her phone. They asked for her by name and I said, sorry, you just missed her. I just know she woulda been laughing at that. Grief is a strange thing."

"As a former middle child who is now an only child, the trauma laughter is what keeps us going. When I tell people my siblings are dead and they get all quiet, I like to reassure them, 'I didn't k!ll them.' They still don't laugh, but I do."

"My family grieves like y'all. My sisters and I were told we'd have to leave our Nana's wake if we couldn't stop laughing at the atrocious art in the funeral home that she would have hated."

"I lost my son Daniel in October and we have constant conversations and some of them end up just like this. ♥"

"My daughter died last year shortly after birth and on Christmas my husband said, 'Abigail was such a good girl this year, she didn't make a peep and didn't ask for a single thing for Christmas!' Grief is weird but the humor keeps us going."

"I can 100% confirm this is exactly how my sister and I would be about each other too. There is no right way to grieve, no timeline. Some of my meaningful memories involve cracking up with my family shortly after one of our loved ones passed away. All I see is a group of siblings who clearly love each other dearly. ❤️❤️❤️❤️"

"My baby brother died in July and the laughing so you don't cry is so valid 🥺 my brother would have been the first one to laugh at how hard me and my sisters boohooed at his funeral. 🤣"

"If I died, this is exactly how I would want my siblings to act 💀 pls giggle about how absurd my earthly departure was."

Humor can be a healthy coping mechanism

A 2020-2021 study of grief triggers found an "unexpected" result: humor can both trigger grief and help people navigate it.

"Humor was revealed as a grief trigger for many participants, as well as a periodic way for most to cope with their grief," the study's authors write. "As humor is not often associated with grief, these humor findings were unexpected."

Everyone grieves differently, so naturally, the study participants had varying experiences with humor in their grief process. For instance, some people found it triggering because funny things reminded them of the person who died and highlighted their loss.

One participant shared:

“(Humor) reminded me of him, as he liked to joke around, and I am in hard grief. Too much is reminding me of him, and I have to live here in our house but without him now. I have to accept he is dead. Life moves on. No one can help us. Grief is something you go through alone” (P2).


@tofivefromthree

come grieve with me🫶🏼 I’ll be checking a big one off my list next week🤍 If you have any ideas, please let me know! #grieftok #deadbrothersclub #siblingloss #fyp #griefandloss

And another shared:

“I never knew until she died, how much I appreciated her ability to laugh and make fun of things. We would always laugh on the phone or whenever we visited. She could tell outrageous stories. After she died, all I had to do was think about that and I would get a major wave of grief. I still get grief waves when I think of her and how much she made life fun for me” (P1).

However, others found that humor and laughter helped them:

“Humor is what made it possible for me to live, I looked forward to the times I could laugh or smile; I could get a break from my grief. I even started searching for humor, every day I looked for funny stories or cartoon jokes, so each day I could laugh and be lifted out of my grief” (P10).

"(She) had been a funny person who laughed a lot until she became ill and life got to be very tough for her. Now when I hear a joke or see something funny, I can remember and appreciate Mom as she once was, and be happy that her suffering is over and that for most of her life, her life was good. She got a lot out of life. She was the one who made her life enjoyable; a good lesson for us all” (P7).

And of course, some people found a mix of both to be true:

“Hearing a laugh often triggered tough grief. But I am finding now that good memories, happy memories, and good thoughts about her are instead being triggered. I so loved to hear her laugh and to laugh with her. Laughing is a wonderful way to remember her. It honors her life and respects her. Laughing is what defined her. I can live with that and I can take comfort in that” (P1).

Not everyone will find humor to be appropriate, especially people who have never experienced major grief. The key is not to judge one another's processing and to allow whatever feelings and experiences of grief happen as they roll through. Dealing with a death is hard, and if letting people grieve however they grieve without judgment makes it even the tiniest bit easier, that's what we all should do.

As Brittany shared with "the grief police" who criticized her video:

"I’m allowed to grieve out loud and publicly. I’m allowed to grieve differently than you do. I hope my loved ones find joy even after I pass. I hope they find silly things they think I would love. I hope they laugh. I hope they make videos and share my most embarrassing moments. I’m allowed to be sad and also find humor in the absurdity of losing someone I love. The beauty is that none of us grieve exactly the same because we have different relationships with our loved ones who have passed on. I would never judge someone for how they grieve. And choosing to judge how I grieve someone I love most in the world, a relationship you know nothing about, is a silly, silly, thing to do.🤍"

You can follow Brittany on Instagram and TikTok.

Humor
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