5 important things every young woman should remember in the wake of the election.

After this divisive election, I want to take a moment to speak directly to young women in this country. I’m sorry.

I’m sorry we failed you. I’m sorry you have woken up to a reality where you believe not only can a woman not be president, but in place of a competent professional woman, we’ve selected a man who treats women badly and speaks about women in such a degrading manner. We as a country have sent you a terrible message, and I want to apologize for that.

You are beautiful.

Despite what you’ve heard, you are not defined by a number on a 1–10 scale. Beauty is not defined only as a Barbie doll with a certain breast size, five-inch pumps, and perfect hair — although that’s what you will be led to believe by the comments he has made and the choices he has made in his personal life. I assure you that is not the case.


Beauty comes in all shapes and sizes and colors. If the magazines you’re reading tell you any different, stop buying them. If the fashion brands you’re wearing tell you any different, stop buying them.

It is not OK for someone to grab you. Ever.

That hand that slips into the back of your cocktail dress at an event. That hand on your thigh at the bar. That boy who pulls your pants down in gym class as a joke. That boy who rips your shirt off in school as a joke. That guy on the street who puts his hand on your shoulder and tells you to smile. That guy on the train who pretends it’s just crowded. None of it is OK. And don’t let anyone tell you any different.

You are not defined by your relationship to a man.

It is disappointing that the only real woman presidential candidate our country could stomach was launched into the political sphere through her husband. For some reason, too many people in this country still feel “It’s OK, as long as he’ll be there with her calling the shots.” We need to redefine that. First lady cannot and should not be the only plausible path to the White House.

Be smart. Be a badass.

The questions should be: What do you want to be when you grow up? What do you want to do? Not what you want to look like, what size you want to be, what bag you want to own, who you want to marry.

What do you want to do?

If you’re smarter than the boys, be smarter than them. Don’t dumb yourself down to not intimidate them. If you can kick their ass in sports, do it. Don’t worry about being feminine or girly or worry about whether a boy will like you. Do what you love. Be who you are. And don’t apologize.

Make it rain glass.

We’ve done it wrong. We’ve walked it off too many times. We’ve awkwardly giggled when dealing with harassment in the workplace because we’ve thought that anything else would leave us out of the conversation.

We’ve been timid. We’ve tiptoed. We’ve played the game. No more.

I said during the third debate there was a moment I felt it and could see in Hillary’s eyes 30 years of biting her tongue, of being held to a different level of scrutiny, of that constant anxiety of not getting too loud or too emotional lest you be branded a bitch, or aggressive. I saw that feeling of being a woman in a man’s world.

My favorite post this week was from a woman who said she was catcalled on her way to vote. Her response: “Grab your umbrellas, boys. It’s about to rain glass.”

Just because Hillary did not win does not mean we need to lose that feeling, that bravado, that fearlessness.

Do not back down now. Make it rain glass. Mothers, tell your daughters. Be an example. Make it rain, little girls. We are deflated​ but not defeated. Instead, it’s time to make it rain.

True

When Sue Hoppin was in college, she met the man she was going to marry. "I was attending the University of Denver, and he was at the Air Force Academy," she says. "My dad had also attended the University of Denver and warned me not to date those flyboys from the Springs."

"He didn't say anything about marrying one of them," she says. And so began her life as a military spouse.

The life brings some real advantages, like opportunities to live abroad — her family got to live all around the US, Japan, and Germany — but it also comes with some downsides, like having to put your spouse's career over your own goals.

"Though we choose to marry someone in the military, we had career goals before we got married, and those didn't just disappear."

Career aspirations become more difficult to achieve, and progress comes with lots of starts and stops. After experiencing these unique challenges firsthand, Sue founded an organization to help other military spouses in similar situations.

Sue had gotten a degree in international relations because she wanted to pursue a career in diplomacy, but for fourteen years she wasn't able to make any headway — not until they moved back to the DC area. "Eighteen months later, many rejections later, it became apparent that this was going to be more challenging than I could ever imagine," she says.

Eighteen months is halfway through a typical assignment, and by then, most spouses are looking for their next assignment. "If I couldn't find a job in my own 'hometown' with multiple degrees and a great network, this didn't bode well for other military spouses," she says.

She's not wrong. Military spouses spend most of their lives moving with their partners, which means they're often far from family and other support networks. When they do find a job, they often make less than their civilian counterparts — and they're more likely to experience underemployment or unemployment. In fact, on some deployments, spouses are not even allowed to work.

Before the pandemic, military spouse unemployment was 22%. Since the pandemic, it's expected to rise to 35%.

Sue eventually found a job working at a military-focused nonprofit, and it helped her get the experience she needed to create her own dedicated military spouse program. She wrote a book and started saving up enough money to start the National Military Spouse Network (NMSN), which she founded in 2010 as the first organization of its kind.

"I founded the NMSN to help professional military spouses develop flexible careers they could perform from any location."

"Over the years, the program has expanded to include a free digital magazine, professional development events, drafting annual White Papers and organizing national and local advocacy to address the issues of most concern to the professional military spouse community," she says.

Not only was NMSN's mission important to Sue on a personal level she also saw it as part of something bigger than herself.

"Gone are the days when families can thrive on one salary. Like everyone else, most military families rely on two salaries to make ends meet. If a military spouse wants or needs to work, they should be able to," she says.

"When less than one percent of our population serves in the military," she continues, "we need to be able to not only recruit the best and the brightest but also retain them."

"We lose out as a nation when service members leave the force because their spouse is unable to find employment. We see it as a national security issue."

"The NMSN team has worked tirelessly to jumpstart the discussion and keep the challenges affecting military spouses top of mind. We have elevated the conversation to Congress and the White House," she continues. "I'm so proud of the fact that corporations, the government, and the general public are increasingly interested in the issues affecting military spouses and recognizing the employment roadblocks they unfairly have faced."

"We have collectively made other people care, and in doing so, we elevated the issues of military spouse unemployment to a national and global level," she adds. "In the process, we've also empowered military spouses to advocate for themselves and our community so that military spouse employment issues can continue to remain at the forefront."

Not only has NMSN become a sought-after leader in the military spouse employment space, but Sue has also seen the career she dreamed of materializing for herself. She was recently invited to participate in the public re-launch of Joining Forces, a White House initiative supporting military and veteran families, with First Lady Dr. Jill Biden.

She has also had two of her recommendations for practical solutions introduced into legislation just this year. She was the first in the Air Force community to show leadership the power of social media to reach both their airmen and their military families.

That is why Sue is one of Tory Burch's "Empowered Women" this year. The $5,000 donation will be going to The Madeira School, a school that Sue herself attended when she was in high school because, she says, "the lessons I learned there as a student pretty much set the tone for my personal and professional life. It's so meaningful to know that the donation will go towards making a Madeira education more accessible to those who may not otherwise be able to afford it and providing them with a life-changing opportunity."

Most military children will move one to three times during high school so having a continuous four-year experience at one high school can be an important gift. After traveling for much of her formative years, Sue attended Madeira and found herself "in an environment that fostered confidence and empowerment. As young women, we were expected to have a voice and advocate not just for ourselves, but for those around us."

To learn more about Tory Burch and Upworthy's Empowered Women program visit https://www.toryburch.com/empoweredwomen/. Nominate an inspiring woman in your community today!

Vanna White appeared on "The Price Is Right" in 1980.

Vanna White has been a household name in the United States for decades, which is kind of hilarious when you consider how she gained her fame and fortune. Since 1982, the former model and actress has made millions walking back and forth turning letters (and later simply touching them—yay technology) on the game show "Wheel of Fortune."

That's it. Walking back and forth in a pretty evening gown, flipping letters and clapping for contestants. More on that job in a minute…

As a member of Gen X, television game shows like "Wheel of Fortune" and "The Price is Right" send me straight back to my childhood. Watching this clip from 1980 of Vanna White competing on "The Price is Right" two years before she started turning letters on "Wheel of Fortune" is like stepping into a time machine. Bob Barker's voice, the theme music, the sound effects—I swear I'm home from school sick, lying on the ugly flowered couch with my mom checking my forehead and bringing me Tang.

This video has it all: the early '80s hairstyles, a fresh-faced Vanna White and Bob Barker's casual sexism that would never in a million years fly today.

Keep Reading Show less