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Rochaun Meadows-Fernandez

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A mom told women they shouldn't wear leggings for her sons' sake and instead got a lesson on not policing women's bodies.

Policing women's bodies — and by consequence their clothes — is nothing new to women across the globe. But this mother's "legging problem" is particularly ridiculous.

What someone wears, regardless of gender, is a personal choice. Sadly, many folks like Maryann White, mother of four sons, think women's attire — particularly women's leggings are a threat to men.

While sitting in mass at the University of Notre Dame, White was aghast by the spandex attire the young women in front of her were sporting.

So, late last week, White penned a 'letter to the editor' that described leggings as an “unforgiving garment" and a problem only girls could solve.

“I've thought about writing this letter for a long time. I waited, hoping that fashions would change and such a letter would be unnecessary — but that doesn't seem to be happening. I'm not trying to insult anyone or infringe upon anyone's rights," the mom wrote.

Woman's explanation for being 'standoffish to men in public' brings up an important point about unwanted attention.

From there, she tells a story of her horrific first encounters with leggings and the obstacles they provide to her ability to teach her son that women are worth respecting, as opposed to sex objects and “babes."

“I was ashamed for the young women at Mass. I thought of all the other men around and behind us who couldn't help but see their behinds. She ended on this plea: "Think of the mothers of sons the next time you go shopping and consider choosing jeans instead."

In a delightfully opposing response, the women of Notre Dame University decided to create a "Love Your Leggings Day" because "what you wear is completely your own choice!"

The hashtag #leggingsdayND was created in tandem to remind women that they have body agency and men have the self-control to understand that freedom and not act on attraction. The resulting photos and messages have been nothing short of AWESOME.

Some students have used this hashtag as an opportunity to upload pictures of themselves in leggings – including in some humorous positions, like Annie-Marie.

“A Catholic mom published an opinion in ND's newspaper that leggings LeadMen Into Sin so we're protesting our right to not be responsible for men and to not be constantly policed by morals or femininity #LeggingsDayND",tweeted @anniejarr.

And it got cheekier (pun intended) from there.

The movement has since spread outside of Notre Dame to the point where other moms are addressing the importance of raising sons who aren't just bodies of insatiable lust, like Becky Stewart.

“Mom of two men here - I'm quite sure that mine do not equate female bodies(naked or clothed) with instant boner. @NotreDame#leggingsdayND

And those involved didn't just challenge sexist views about women's attire. They even took the time to highlight the fact that women of color are likely to experience increased levels of scrutiny.

Kate Bermingham, PhD candidate in political theory student and co-founder of Irish 4 Reproductive Health (I4RH) an all-volunteer, student-led nonprofit advocating for reproductive justice at the University of Notre Dame, brought up important racial intersections.

Husband spends 2 years planting thousands of flowers to bring his blind wife joy.

Women of color face high levels of harassment and there have been several instances of the last few years – like Serena Williams being criticized for wearing a catsuit during a French Open despite health benefits.

Finally, Dani Green, a PhD Candidate in English at Notre Dame has an excellent thread that discusses why this movement is so much bigger than women's freedom to wear leggings.

There have always been plenty of other folks out there who believe women should ditch leggings and take on the emotional weight of being responsible for men's choices like White. And there will likely be many more. But to them we simple say, "Leg it go!"

I'm sorry, I had to.

This article originally appeared on March 28, 2019.

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A topless selfie cost a middle school teacher her job. She's fighting back citing gender discrimination.

Lauren Miranda, a middle school math teacher, was fired after a shirtless photo she sent to her boyfriend back in 2016 ended up in her student's hands.

Miranda didn't choose to send the photos to her students — or anyone other than her boyfriend at the time. It's quite baffling that the school that employed her felt justified in ending her employment for their distribution.

But the case goes deeper than that. Miranda feels the consequence she endured has more to do with gender discrimination.

She believes if she were a man, her job wouldn't have been in jeopardy. That's why she's refusing to walk away without a fight.

In addition to a $3 million gender discrimination suit — think the unfair double standards women are subjected to related to attire and decency — she's going to do everything she can to bring attention to the way women are regularly victimized by people on the internet sharing their photos without consent.

"How do girls feel when this happens to them?" Miranda told VICE News. "Their photo gets shared without their permission or consent. And what do we say to them?: Crawl in a hole, quit going to school...?”

​​Cyber security and online privacy have been hot topics since the beginning of the internet. In the last few years, however, the discussion has gotten a lot more complicated, especially with regard to sharing personal photos.​​

A wide range of arguments have been made for who owns photos that are put into this public sphere. Everything from hackers to cell phone malfunctions and even a company's right to sell our personal information to 3rd parties keep us from reaching a conclusion. But few aspects of personal data have been as concerning and contested as personal photos containing nudity.

So once again, the public is calling into question the appropriate course of action for victims of non-consenting photo sharing.

Unfortunately, it's just the latest in a long line of photo-sharing incidents that has impacted people — disproportionately women — globally.

In fact, it's impacted developed nations so severely that revenge porn legislation is being put in place. And in some countries like South Korea, photos being shared without women's consent has led to the widespread scrutiny of the entire K pop industry.

And back at Bellport Middle School, many parents and community members are rallying behind Miranda, vocalizing their frustration with the situation. And strangers on social media are echoing their sentiments.

Women's rights activists suggest that we must point out the hypocrisy of this situation. Standards of purity and conduct are often enforced much more strongly with women than men.

In today's world, it is unrealistic to assume that sexting and nude photos won't wind up in the virtual world somehow. It is no one else's right to tell us that we can't or shouldn't share images of our bodies with others. However, that doesn't mean we should be powerless to stop them from impacting our lives in a negative way if they are somehow shared without our consent.

Instead of focusing on whether or not images should be shared, because we know they will, we need to put forth more effort into deciding the consequences when someone's images are shared without permission.​​

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Kids can drive mini cars into surgery at this hospital, leaving their anxiety in the dust.

All good parents want their children to live happy and healthy lives. But for parents of sick kids, particularly those with chronic and congenital health conditions, that's a much more difficult goal to achieve.

Unsurprisingly, anxiety is ever-present in both these parents and kids' lives.

As a mother of two children with congenital health conditions, I know first-hand how scary it can be when you’re worried and trying to process the “what if” or expected eventuality of surgery.    

We also often worry about what it will mean when our children are old enough to process the risks of surgery. It’s difficult for any parent to see their child fearful or in a state of discomfort.

And surgery is much harder to explain to a child than small medical procedures like shots — the stakes are higher and the unknowns can make the process even more terrifying, especially for young kids.

In California, one hospital is doing what they can to make the idea of surgery less daunting by allowing kids to drive mini cars into the operating room.

At Doctors Medical Center in Modesto, California, they know that fun can be a great distraction from anxiety.

The innovative solution to reducing kids' discomfort came from pre-op nurse Kimberly Martinez after she read about the long-term impact cars have on young kids. To put her plan into action, they let kids choose between a mini pink Volkswagen Beetle and a Black Mercedes.

So far, the results have been awesome (and adorable).  

“When the children find out they can go into the operating room riding in a cool little car, they light up, and in most cases, their fears melt away,” the hospital wrote in a statement to PEOPLE. “In addition, when parents see their children put at ease, it puts them at ease as well.”

Once the video started to go viral, folks in the social media world expressed their gratefulness for the opportunity to see something so positive vrooming down their timelines.

Doctors Medical Center is far from the only medical facility taking steps to reduce children's anxiety. A number of resources are dedicated to helping children headed to surgery, as well as their parents, however, sometimes adding a reading list to an already addled family isn't a practical solution.

Many of these parents are so busy and stressed they simply can't make the time to do socio-emotional research on reducing anxiety on top of learning about their children's health conditions.

Innovative programs like that at Doctors Medical Center take one more thing off parent's plates and make what can be a tense experience go more smoothly for everyone.

Other hospitals are catching on, too. It's why Sheffield Children’s Hospital offers it's kid patients their own sweet ride into surgery.

The more medical facilities that utilize creative solutions like this to easy young patients and their families' anxieties the better. Here's hoping we see many more fun, innovative ideas sprouting up in hospitals all over the country.

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To help her gay son, this amazing mom carried and gave birth to her own granddaughter.

Like many gay couples, Matthew Eledge and his husband Elliot Dougherty desperately wanted to have their own children. But being in a same-sex relationship called for them to be a little more creative in how they achieved that dream.

At 59 years old, Matthew’s mother, Cecile Eledge, was supportive and excited to be a grandma. So excited — that she offered to serve as the surrogate and carry her own grandchild.

While it began as sort of a family joke, eventually the idea grew into something inexplicably wonderful. Eledge and Dougherty’s daughter Uma Louise.

"It just seemed like a really beautiful sentiment on her part," Elliott told the BBC. "She's such a selfless woman."

However, the fertility specialist, Dr. Carolyn Maud Doherty,  listed it as a realistic possibility. So she had Cecile come in for a few tests, all of which she passed.

“She’s 61 years old and has lower blood pressure than the rest of us,” Matthew told Buzzfeed News.

“It’s important for people to note that not every 60-year-old is in good enough health to be a surrogate. There are probably only a handful of people across the country who can do this — only a handful of people who have done it,” Doherty told Buzzfeed News.

Cecile got pregnant after the first embryo transfer (Matthew’s sperm and an egg from Elliot's sister Lea), and on March 25th, she gave birth (naturally) to a 5 pound 13 ounce baby girl.

Their journey to becoming a family was not without struggle though. Elliot and Matthew live in Omaha, Nebraska, where they were no strangers to discrimination.

It’s one of many places where there is no non-discrimination legislation in place to ensure LGBTQ individuals have equal access to employment, housing, education and other resources without being targeted for their orientation/gender identity.

Eledge was even dismissed from his job upon announcing his upcoming marriage to Dougherty years ago. Thankfully his students fought for him, but it shouldn’t have come to that.

Similarly, same sex couples in Nebraska weren’t allowed to act as foster parents until 2017 after a ban was lifted.

The road to parenthood is long and arduous for millions of folks who desire to have children. But for same-sex couples, it’s often paved with more obstacles. When paired with social barriers and a lack of legislation, LGBTQ individuals have to fight two times as hard for their right to parent.

Surrogacy, as Matthew and Elliott found, is a potential solution.

For many same-sex couples like Eledge and Dougherty — and many hetero couples as well — surrogacy can make parenting a biological child a reality.  

It’s not surprising it’s become increasingly common.

In the last 17 years, more than 18,400 infants were born via gestational carriers like Cecile.

More and more, gay male couples have begun using surrogacy as a way to have their own biological children. The types of surrogates used range widely — some go through agencies, others find help through family members and friends, like Matthew and Elliott did — but the dream is the same; a chance at biological parenthood.

That said, IVF — which is what prospective parents have to do when they decide to pursue surrogacy — is expensive and therefore limiting in terms of who can really pursue it as an option.

So while LGBT equality is on the horizon, there are still many obstacles in the way, especially when it comes to becoming parents.

We can get closer by making things like health care, family planning, housing, employment and education more accessible, but most importantly, by ensuring each state offers legal protection from discrimination for all.

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