upworthy

toxic masculinity

Health

Ryan Reynolds got a colonoscopy after losing a bet and found a lifesaving surprise

Only 60% of men over 50 are getting regular colonoscopies. Reynolds just proved why they're important.

Ryan Reynolds/YouTube
Ryan Reynolds filmed his colonoscopy after losing a bet—it turned out to be 'lifesaving'

Cancer is serious. Ryan Reynolds is not. Luckily his characteristic sense of humor—along with being true to his word—has helped shine a light on a sobering topic in a fun way. First, he made a friendly bet with his Welcome to Wrexham co-star Rob McElhenney of It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia with whom he also co-owns the Welsh football club Wrexham A.F.C.

The bet? That McElhenney would not be able to learn Welsh, the official language of Wales, where their soccer team is located. The stakes? If Reynolds lost, he'd have to get a colonoscopy... and post the entire thing to YouTube. About 30 seconds into a YouTube upload titled "Rob & Ryan Lead From Behind," McElhenney begins speaking in near-fluent Welsh.

Uh-oh. Colonoscopy it is.


Butt jokes galore in Ryan Reynolds' DeadpoolGiphy

Reynolds is an actor famous for hilarious hijinks. From his intense fictional feud with Hugh Jackman to performing epic pranks on talk shows, he is often the best thing on the internet for a good laugh. However, he is also not one to shy away from difficult conversations, particularly when it comes to health. So raising awareness about the importance of colonoscopies was, as he quipped, “enough motivation for me to let you in on a camera being shoved up my ass.”

Reynolds might have lost the bet, but his actions paid off. The procedure turned out to be lifesaving.

The video shows the Free Guy and Deadpool actor entering the hospital early in the morning, discussing the procedure with the doctor (with just the perfect amount of gallows humor), and being wheeled into the exam room. Reynolds notes that this will be his first colonoscopy.

As Reynolds begins waking up after the roughly 25-minute procedure, the doctor delivers the news that an “extremely subtle” polyp was discovered and cut out. A polyp is a small abnormal growth of tissue that is often benign but can develop into something much scarier if not detected. Reynolds had previously shown no symptoms.

“I’m not being overly dramatic,” his doctor told him. “This is exactly why you do this. You are interrupting the natural history of a disease, of something of a process that could have ended up developing into cancer and causing all sorts of problems. Instead, you are not only diagnosing the polyp, you are taking it out.”

Watch the whole video here:

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

Ever the expert marketer, Reynolds smoothly slid in a quick plug for his alcohol brand, joking that “I can’t believe you pumped all that Aviation Gin into my IV. I was out like a light” before thanking the doctor.

Reynolds got his colonoscopy at 45, which is the recommended age to begin routine screenings. Though it’s a preventable cancer, colorectal cancer is the third most common cause of cancer-related deaths for men and women combined, and it is predicted to be the top cancer killer for people under 50 by the year 2030.

Because of the inherent invasiveness of the procedure, many people feel uncomfortable even talking about colonoscopies, let alone getting one, despite early detection being so vital. A colonoscopy involves the patient being sedated while a long tube is inserted into the rectum, which allows a small video camera to explore the colon and look for cancer or other abnormalities.

ryan reynolds, wrexham, celebrities, psa, public service announcement, mens health, aging, colonoscopyRyan Reynolds shows we shouldn't be scared of a camera "up our ass"Giphy

Some estimates say only about 60% of men over the age of 50 are following the screening guidelines, with men notoriously being afraid of feeling vulnerable in front of a doctor and also correlating the colonoscopy procedure with a certain sex act. Yes, sadly that's a real fear that has been studied and documented. You'd think not dying of cancer would be more important, but welcome to toxic masculinity.

In a show of good faith and education, McElhenney got a colonoscopy as well for the project, and took a strange pride in having more benign polyps than Reynolds did.

rob mcelhenney, welcome to wrexam, always sunny in philadelphia, ryan reynolds, mens healthRob loves it.Giphy

Now, thanks to Reynolds and McElhenney hilariously riffing on their experience and normalizing it, the whole thing might not seem so daunting after all. If a true Marvel superhero can get his regular health screenings, the rest of us should definitely fall in line.

Thanks for the delightfully silly PSA, Ryan.

This article originally appeared three years ago.

From Your Site Articles
mens health
Men's Health

Men share ridiculous ways their masculinity was questioned

Reading isn't manly, seriously?

Photo by Yogendra Singh on Unsplash

Is it manly enough to cradle a puppy?

Okay, we’ve come a long way in terms of rethinking gender norms. Fashion is less rigidly conforming (you’ve seen the man who rocks pencil skirts and stilettos, right?). More men are flourishing in jobs traditionally performed by women. And perhaps most importantly, there is a growing number of male support groups that encourage heartfelt communication and emotional well-being. That said, there still remain quite a few outdated belief systems when it comes to how we define masculinity.

Case in point, a recent Reddit thread sparked by the question: “Men of Reddit, what was the most ridiculous reason why someone questioned your masculinity?” Some of these answers are indeed head scratchers. Others are flat-out offensive. Here are 10 of the most egregious accounts:


1. Reading

men who readPhoto by Dollar Gill on Unsplash

“I was reading a book on my lunch break while I was working construction, and got a bunch of sh*t about reading being for women.” – Middle-Eye2129

“Went from women not being allowed to read to reading being only for women... what a world.” – Comprehensive-Ad4566

2. Practicing the most basic of safety measures

men of redditGiphy

One person wrote that their masculinity was questioned for “wearing gloves while welding.”

Because having all fingers intact makes you less of a man? Um … what?

Wear your gloves and fasten your safety belts, gentlemen. It’s okay. I'm pretty sure The Rock does.

3. Not eating the right foods

gender fluidGiphy

“Had a friend give another friend shit because he wanted to eat a corn dog. He said grown ass men don’t eat corn dogs. Any man should understand.” – mondayortampa

It’s not just because of the distinct shape of certain foods garnering the “unmanly” label, either. See below:

“My dad got sh*t from a guy he was working with because he was eating a plain bagel with butter on it and drinking chocolate milk because the guy said it’s childish. Dad never cared and just laughed at the guy for being an idiot. Who wouldn’t like that combo? It’s a great thing to eat!” – WhatsUpFishes

“My husband bought some of our homegrown raspberries into work to share and a guy he works with said they were ‘girl food.’ It must be so exhausting to have to gender your food.” – Pepperfig_clover

4. Or drinking the right drinks

gender normsPhoto by Atikh Bana on Unsplash

“Went to a Mexican restaurant and we waited at the bar before we could get a table. This place has awesome strawberry blended margaritas so I got one. Apparently lime = straight, strawberry = gay.” – Thirty_Helens_Agree

5. Appreciating cleanliness

men doing female choresGiphy

“I've had both women I just started dating, and male acquaintances who have thought my clean apartment was an indication I was gay.” – NorCalDustin

6. Using pink … anything

men wearing pinkwww.publicdomainpictures.net

“At work I gave a guy a report and it had a pink paperclip on it.

He asked me why I gave him a pink paperclip. I told him I just grabbed one. He then asked why I had a pink paperclip - I told him I had a rainbow pack.

Then he wanted to know why, when I saw it was pink, I didn't throw it away. He told me I shouldn't use pink paperclips [because] ‘people might have questions.’” – Everyday_Im_Stedelen

“About 30 years ago, they came out with neon string lines. As I work construction, I am constantly using string to ensure things are straight. By far, the brightest of the strings was a pink one.

So, I was constantly chided by the crew for having a pink string. This only happened until it started getting closer to dusk, at which point they all wanted to borrow my string.” – Dioscouri

7. Not applying deodorant in a ‘manly way’

patriarchyGiphy

“Somebody once told me I wasn't applying deodorant manly enough.” – PearSB

“How do you apply deodorant in a manly manner?” – The_One_True_Disease

“You set fire to the can and let it explode behind you as you look epically to the camera.” – Astrophobia42

8. Being kind

rethinking masculinitycommons.wikimedia.org

“Got accused of being gay for being nice to people in the dive bar I go to... I guess it's not masculine to be nice to people.” – pgh613

9. Having daughters

dads and daughtersPhoto by Bermix Studio on Unsplash

“When I was pregnant, with a girl, someone said to me, in front of my husband, ‘a real man would’ve given you a boy.’” – badmamathree

“Someone should have said that to Henry VIII.” – BaldingMonk

“Why do you think there was a protestant movement?” – ArthurBonesly

10. Allowing a woman to do manly things

toxic masculinityGiphy

“I was taking a break from driving a forklift and a woman asked if she could drive it (she was qualified to drive it so this wasn't just a random question from a random person.) I agreed and this one guy got so offended that I let a woman take over driving the forklift from me. This was back when ‘mancard’ was a thing so he of course said I needed to turn in my mancard for that.

Unsurprisingly, it turns out this guy got offended at all kinds of things all the time though. If he thought someone wasn't doing something the "right" way, he would rant and whine about it.” – BrickFlock

This article originally appeared two years ago.

From Your Site Articles
Related Articles Around the Web
gender norms
Family

When his young son was bullied for wearing pink this dad had a truly badass response

"Men need to be the example for young boys."

@dougweaverart/TikTok

Imagine if all boys had this kind of support to embrace all parts of themselves.

We often hear about how binary gender norms affect young girls, but any man who’s ever been made fun of for being sensitive or liking “girly” things during childhood can tell you they influence young boys as well. And perhaps the worst offense of these arbitrary limitations is the way they keep individuals from truly knowing and expressing all parts of themselves, which can lead to a slew of interpersonal problems late in life.

Boys in particular are often taught from an early age to shun the qualities in themselves considered to be feminine—things like empathy, compassion, having strong emotions, etc. It’s so well documented now how not nurturing these qualities leads to isolation and loneliness in adulthood, and yet messages like “boys don’t cry” or “pink is for girls” still persist.

Artist, TikTok creator and Doug Weaver (@dougweaverart) recently made a few excellent points as to why adult men need to be the example for young boys if we truly wish to see a change.

In a stitched response to a video where a mom lamented that she knew how to help her daughter “fight back” against gender norms, but not her son, Weaver argued that above all, it’s important for young boys to see grown men “defy” the expectations culture puts on them.

“Society will try to beat boys down until they fall in line,” Weaver said, sharing his own experience of seeing his son come home from school after being bullied for wearing pink and liking unicorns (which, of course, are “for girls” only).

Weaver said that the only solution he saw was to “pinkify” his own life, and be that example his son so desperately needed.


@dougweaverart @Mel | Med Student raising boys is scary, because we know just how much society is built to tear them down. #men #masculinity #parenting #boydad #greenscreenvideo ♬ original sound - dougweaverart

“I added so much pink to my wardrobe,” he explained, saying that he even painted his nails pink so that he’d be seen as the “problem” instead of his son.

“They don’t say anything to me. If they’re not brave enough to confront the color pink, they’re not going to confront me.”

Weaver added that the larger conversation he tries to have with his son is how this is a “fight worth having,” not just for men with feminine qualities but for “but for everyone society tries to reject.”

He then used this example: a boy who secretly wants to wear a dress to school, but doesn’t to avoid getting bullied. Weaver said that solution only works temporarily, since the dress is only a small manifestation of a larger aspect of the boy’s identity, which he would be repressing to fit an expectation.

“They’re getting bullied for what they wear now, they’re going to get bullied for who they are later. And if changing their clothes made the bullying go away when they were younger, they might think that changing their personality will make the bullying go away when they are older.”

What’s more, for this hypothetical boy, for Weaver’s son, and for any boy really, there’s something very vital that’s lost in chasing this idea of masculinity.

“The people who want to take colors from him also want to take his creativity,” Weaver explains “They want to take away his kindness, they want to take away everything that is soft in his life. His feelings and his emotions. They wanna take away his ability to love people who are different from him.”

Yep, that hits the nail of the head perfectly.

And that is why Weaver prioritizes being the example for his son, because “if he sees people criticize me from time to time, and he sees how unaffected I am by it, that is an example to him of the strength and tenacity that it takes for anyone to just be their authentic self.”

And, perhaps more importantly, Weaver is teaching his son that he will be loved and accepted, no matter how he expresses himself. Imagine a world in which all children were taught this valuable lesson.

From Your Site Articles
kids
Parenting

Mom says she won't be raising 'tough boys' to avoid this one toxic trait

“See these boys? These are our boys. And we have decided not to raise tough boys.”

Photo credit: Canva

Boys do cry. And they should be allowed to do so.

Parenting has evolved in myriad ways, but certainly, one of the more potent shifts has been attitudes towards raising boys.

As a society, we have seen how detrimental the whole “men should be strong and never show emotion” thing can be, and more and more parents are trying not to pass that outdated belief onto their sons.

Still, you’ll definitely run across an adult—be it a parent, grandparent, teacher, babysitter, etc— saying “boys don’t cry!” or “toughen up” from time to time whenever a young boy shows sensitivity.

And that is exactly why a video posted by Jen Hamilton, a mom of two boys, is such an important watch, because in it Hamilton deftly explains how associating masculinity with toughness teaches boys that only one emotion is allowed expression.

Hamilton begins by showing a picture of her sons as she says, “we have decided not to raise tough boys.”

“I might sound crazy, but when you raise your kids to be tough, or you tell them to toughen up, what you're teaching them is how to mask true emotions that they're feeling to appear strong,” she continues.


@_jen_hamilton_ Why we aren’t raising “tough” boys
♬ Paper Birds (3 min) - Jordan Halpern Schwartz

And as these “tough” little boys grow up into men, internalizing and suppressing their true emotion in order to appear strong, they become capable of expressing only one emotion—anger.

Hamilton likened it to pushing down a beach ball into water. Eventually that beach ball is going to explode up.

“When that boundary finally breaks, it comes out as temper. Throwing things, yelling," Hamilton says.

Instead, Hamilton and her husband are teaching their sons “to feel deeply” and allow emotions, even the negative ones, so that they may understand them better.”

As an example, Hamilton shares that when her son came home one day feeling left out of something she responded with ‘Hey, that really sucks. And I know exactly what that feels like and it really hurts.”

“I don't say, ‘Get over it’ or ‘Toughen up.’”

Hamilton asserts that in this scenario, she is teaching her son the value of compassion for others. When they see someone else feeling left out, they can better empathize with them. “But when we say things like get over it or toughen up, you're telling them that those feelings aren't valid and then they are not able to see those feelings as valid in other people.”

Hamilton goes so far to say that anyone who is not taught to validate their own emotions won’t have the tools to empathize with others, and this is what helps create narcissism.

Hamilton also shares that where she didn’t grow up with a dad who had anger issues, her husband did. Thankfully, he has developed his own emotional intelligence in spite of it and has no problem “getting down on his knees” to meet their sons' emotions head-on.

In conclusion, Hamilton declares that she doesn't think it’s ever “necessary or helpful” to expose her kids, or anyone else's, to “harsh situations to toughen them up.”

raising boys, toxic masculinity, patriarchy, parentingEmpathy is always worth teaching. Photo credit: Canva

Down in the comments, other adults couldn't agree more with Hamiton’s stance.

“This is what breaks the trauma of patriarchy. This is what saves young males,” one person wrote.

Another person, a principal, shared, “I am always telling boys it’s okay to cry, to be hurt, and to have feelings.”

Still another viewer wrote “Exactly! Help our children to feel safe enough to express themselves, teach empathy and compassion. We need this now more than ever.”

For those looking to break the cycle of toxic masculinity with their own sons, but not sure where to start, another viewer mentioned the book “Boys Will Be Human: A Get-Real Gut-Check Guide to Becoming the Strongest, Kindest, Bravest Person You Can Be,” written by Justin Baldoni. Sounds like a phenomenal resource. You can find it on Amazon here.

From Your Site Articles
parenting
Trending Stories