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Pope Francis is now allowing priests to bless same-sex couples but with one big stipulation

His logic makes a lot of sense.

via Casa Rosada/Wikimedia Commons and Polina Tankilevitch/Pexels

A same-sex couple and Pope Francis.

Pope Francis has made a radical shift in Catholic Church doctrine by allowing priests to bless same-sex couples. The Vatican announced the change on Monday, December 18, in a document that outlined the new policy.

The change is one of Francis' most dramatic in his 10 years as pope.

However, even though the document feels like a softening of discriminatory policies within the Church, it’s also a clear statement that it still believes marriage is exclusively between a man and a woman. The policy also states that although priests can now bless same-sex couples, they must not be tied to any specific Catholic celebration or religious service or seen as a civil union ceremony.

The blessings may not involve clothing, gestures, or rituals that belong in a wedding.

The document is a reversal of the Vatican's Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith’s 2021 statement that the Church cannot bless same-sex unions because "God cannot bless sin."

The Pope’s rationale for the change in doctrine is his belief that requesting a blessing, regardless of one’s lifestyle, shows an openness to a relationship with God, so it shouldn’t be denied.

"One should not prevent or prohibit the Church's closeness to people in every situation in which they might seek God's help through a simple blessing," the document from the Vatican's doctrine office says.

"Ultimately, a blessing offers people a means to increase their trust in God," the document continues. "The request for a blessing, thus, expresses and nurtures openness to the transcendence, mercy, and closeness to God in a thousand concrete circumstances of life, which is no small thing in the world in which we live."

"Thus, when people ask for a blessing, an exhaustive moral analysis should not be placed as a precondition for conferring it," the document said.

The Pope’s decision to allow priests to bless same-sex relationships is another bold move in a papacy defined by greater LGBTQ inclusivity. A few months into his papacy, when approached about a priest’s sexuality, Pope Francis asked, “Who am I to judge?” Earlier this year, in an interview with the Associated Press, the Pope said “Being homosexual isn’t a crime.” Last month, the Vatican said trans people can be baptized as godparents.

The decision has caused debate among leaders in the Catholic Church.

“The significance of this news cannot be overstated,” Francis DeBernardo of New Ways Ministry, which supports LGBTQ+ Catholics, said, according to NBC News. “It is one thing to formally approve same-gender blessings, which he had already pastorally permitted, but to say that people should not be subjected to “an exhaustive moral analysis” to receive God’s love and mercy is an even more significant step.”

However, the news is troubling to some conservative Catholics.

“The Vatican’s statement is, in my view, the most unfortunate public announcement in decades,” University of Notre Dame theologian Ulrich Lehner said in a statement. “Moreover, some bishops will use it as a pretext to do what the document explicitly forbids, especially since the Vatican has not stopped them before. It is—and I hate to say it—an invitation to schism.”

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For Lent, the Pope is asking Catholics to stop being mean to each other on social media

Photo by Ashwin Vaswani on Unsplash

Being nice to each other on social media doesn't just feel novel, it might literally be holy. During his Ash Wednesday remarks, Pope Francis suggested that his devout followers take a break from trolling people on social media:

"We live in an atmosphere polluted by too much verbal violence, too many offensive and harmful words, which are amplified by the internet," he said. "Today, people insult each other as if they were saying 'Good day.'"


Photo by Nacho Arteaga on


Here at Upworthy, finding ways to unite and build each other up instead of tearing each other down is at the very core of our mission. Social media has created an incredibly powerful tool for self-policing that would otherwise allow so many injustices to slip through the cracks. Massive cultural milestones like the #MeToo movement literally wouldn't have happened without social media helping to power the voices of women speaking out and providing them with a forum to safely do so.

But we've also seen how the same social media outlets like Twitter and Facebook can be used to tear down the innocent or even "cancel" someone who has made mistakes but expressed a willingness to learn, apologize, and do better. Striking the right balance between righteous anger and self-righteous behavior could literally decide the next four years of our government heading into the 2020 Election season.

And we're delighted that Pope Francis seems to really get it.

Of course, Pope Francis also suggested Catholics consider giving up their TVs and phones for Lent, saying: "Lent is the right time to make room for the Word of God. It is the time to turn off the television and open the Bible. It is the time to disconnect from your cell phone and connect to the Gospel."

We're not experts on the holy word, but that might just be a bridge too far!

The best part is you don't have to be religious at all to practice a little civil discourse. Sometimes, the most powerful decision is to say nothing at all rather than add to a toxic discourse. According to Reuters, the Pope's words were "partially improvised" but they feel scripted in the best sense of the word; a guidebook for what to say, what not to say and how to navigate between the two in moments of doubt or confusion.

Speaking of Lent, Pope Francis described this moment as "a time to give up useless words, gossip, rumors, tittle-tattle and speak to God on a first-name basis."

The Pope hasn't mentioned his call for a more civil social media on social media itself. But his Ash Wednesday tweets were filled with a typically civic-minded approach to his faith that has won Francis accolades from people across faiths and those who practice no faith at all.

And for those who don't have a religious affiliation, instead of speaking to God on a first-name basis, perhaps we can start with speaking to our digital neighbors in the way in which we'd like to be spoken to.

It's OK to have disagreements. In fact, civil debates are part of the cornerstone of any healthy democracy. But dialing back the invective — going high when they go low might just be the missing part of the whole conversation.

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A gay man had a private conversation with the pope. What he said was game-changing.

An unexpected response from the pope may signal an important shift in the Catholic Church's views on queer identity.

Photo by Marvin Recinos/AFP/Getty Images.

According to CNN, Juan Carlos Cruz, a survivor of sexual abuse at the hands of a Chilean priest, spent three days in April 2018 with Pope Francis at the Vatican. During the visit, Cruz discussed his sexuality with the pope, which sparked a surprising response.

"You know Juan Carlos, that does not matter," Cruz says the pope told him. "God made you like this. God loves you like this. The pope loves you like this, and you should love yourself and not worry about what people say."

Photo by Ettore Ferrari/AFP/Getty Images.

Though the Vatican has declined to comment on the conversation — with Vatican spokesperson Greg Burke telling CNN that "We do not normally comment on the pope's private conversations" — social media users around the world were quick to comment on the unusually progressive view of queer identity from the church.

Given the church's history with queer individuals, the pope's alleged comments are an important — albeit incipient — move toward progress.    

From pushing gay leaders out of the church to condemning queer congregants, the church's problematic history has understandably caused many individuals to leave the church or disregard it entirely.  

Photo by Vincenzo Pinto/AFP/Getty Images

The pope himself is far from perfect, too. He's declined to apologize about the Catholic Church's past problematic behavior toward indigenous communities, and he still doesn't affirm transgender individuals. Yet one would be remiss to not acknowledge that he is easily the most progressive pope in the Church's history and has frustrated many traditionalists in the church with his nonjudgmental comments on gay marriage, his movement toward holding the Church accountable for its role in systematic sexual abuse, his unique beliefs on the existence of hell, and his history of acknowledging climate change.

Photo by Max Rossi/AFP/Getty Images.

He's complicated and imperfect, but for many queer Christians and Catholics, the pope's words are meaningful.

Queer people don't owe anything to the Catholic Church nor do they need the church's support to live their best and brightest lives. But, it's impossible to negate the profound impact of religion — both positive and negative — on many individuals' lives, including people who identify under the LGBTQ umbrella. Many queer people do find religion deeply important, and they deserve to have a leader who affirms their livelihood.

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'You have it in you to shout': The pope rallies behind teens demanding change.

Pope Francis has become something of a pop culture icon, with over 5 million Instagram followers and a blockbuster documentary set for release this spring. It's not hard to see why.

In the homily of his Palm Sunday Mass, Pope Francis took the opportunity to speak to young people, many of whom were gathered to celebrate the Catholic Church’s World Youth Day.

Palm Sunday at the Vatican. Photo by Franco Origlia/Getty Images.

Perhaps coincidentally — but probably not — the pope’s words also came a day after the March for Our Lives, a series of worldwide, youth-led demonstrations protesting gun violence. It’s estimated that more than 800,000 people attended the march in Washington, D.C., alone.

Though Pope Francis didn’t mention the March for Our Lives specifically, he might as well have. His message was perfectly timed to encourage the thousands of youth who are advocating for better gun legislation and being met with loud resistance from the NRA and others.

EN:The Church wants to listen to all young people, no one excluded, because we need to better understand what God and history are asking of us. PT: A Igreja quer escutar todos os jovens, nenhum excluído, porque temos necessidade de entender melhor aquilo que Deus e a história nos estão pedindo. ES: La Iglesia desea escuchar a todos los jóvenes, sin excepciones, porque necesitamos comprender mejor lo que Dios y la historia nos están pidiendo. IT: La Chiesa vuole ascoltare tutti i giovani, nessuno escluso, perché abbiamo bisogno di capire meglio quello che Dio e la storia ci stanno chiedendo. FR: L'Église veut écouter tous les jeunes, personne n'est exclu, parce que nous avons besoin de mieux comprendre ce que Dieu et l'histoire sont en train de nous demander. DE: Die Kirche will alle Jugendliche hören, niemand ausgeschlossen, weil wir besser verstehen müssen, was Gott und die Geschichte von uns verlangen. #synod2018, #jovens, #youngpeople, #jovenes

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First, the pope admonished adults to stop silencing young people.

Pope Francis basically told the grown-ups of the world to back off the young folks, but he did so in his gentle, indirect, pontiff-like way:

“The temptation to silence young people has always existed. There are many ways to silence young people and make them invisible. Many ways to anesthetize them, to make them keep quiet, ask nothing, question nothing. There are many ways to sedate them, to keep them from getting involved, to make their dreams flat and dreary, petty and plaintive.”

I don’t know about you, but what I heard there was, “Hey adults [*cough* NRA]. Knock it off.”

Photo by Franco Origlia/Getty Images.

Indeed, the number of adults I’ve seen in comments berating our young protesters is appalling. These kids are being told they aren’t old enough to know what they’re talking about despite having been through the trauma of a mass shooting and/or the daily fear of gun violence in their communities. They’re being called puppets, pawns, and shills — as if they couldn't possibly have something to say about the gun violence that directly affects them.

The NRA posted a recruitment video on their Facebook page the day of the march, with the caption, “Today’s protests aren’t spontaneous. Gun-hating billionaires and Hollywood elites are manipulating and exploiting children as part of their plan to DESTROY the Second Amendment and strip us of our right to defend ourselves and our loved ones.”

Ugh, seriously. Knock it off.

Pope Francis also spoke directly to young people, encouraging them “not to keep quiet.”

The pope then turned his attention to young activists, telling them basically to keep on using their voices to fight for change, even when the grown-ups around them are corrupt, grumpy, and silent:

“Dear young people, you have it in you to shout. It is up to you not to keep quiet. Even if others keep quiet, if we older people and leaders, some corrupt, keep quiet, if the whole world keeps quiet and loses its joy, I ask you: Will you cry out?”

The young people in the crowd shouted out, “Yes!”

I may have stood up in my living room and shouted, “Yes!” too. And I’m 43 years old and not even Catholic.

Pope Francis greets the crowd after Palm Sunday Mass in the Vatican. Photo by Franco Origlia/Getty Images.

I love that the 81-year-old pope, who has the ear of more than a billion Catholics around the world, is uplifting the voices of youth. So often, young people get a bad rap in our society, but I have been blown away by these young activists. Watching the television coverage of the March for Our Lives, I was moved to tears by their eloquence, conviction, maturity, and inclusion. These kids have restored so much of my faith in humanity, and Pope Francis using his substantial pulpit to urge them on just warms my heart.

Two Marjory Stoneman Douglas students were at the Mass in the Vatican, holding gun violence protest signs.

Gabriella Zuniga and Valentina Zuniga are students at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School, where 17 students were shot and killed on Feb. 14, 2018. They were in attendance at the mass in the Vatican on March 25, along with their parents, holding signs that read "We are #MSDSTRONG," "Protect Our Children Not Our Guns," and "#NeverAgain."

Pope Francis is an incredibly aware guy. He may not have seen the Zunigas and their signs in the crowd at Palm Sunday Mass, but there's no doubt that he saw the masses of youth leading the March for Our Lives.

And his message to them on Palm Sunday was heard loud and clear: Keep on shouting, kids, no matter how the grown-ups try to silence you.

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