A man shows off his dapper vest. Theo Von performs stand up.
Theodor Capitani von Kurnatowski III has come a long way from Louisiana, where he emancipated himself from his parents at just 14. While shedding parental supervision, he also shed most of his name, so you might only know him as Theo Von.
Just five years later, Theo became a cast member on MTV's Road Rules and subsequently appeared on four seasons of MTV's The Challenge. If you watched those shows, you'll know Theo never shies away from a funny quip, a weird take, something controversial bordering on dumb, or just plain awkward absurdity.
Theo Von turns aroundGiphy Sport GIF by UFC
But through his now many years as a stand-up comic, content creator, and podcaster, he always asks interesting questions of his guests… and of himself. In an article for NOLA, he claimed his evolution of thought was born from having had the "frame of reference of a poor person."
Just recently, he took a stand on an extremely controversial topic: vests. That's right...that clothing item that used to be reserved only for tuxedo purposes or Diane Keaton. Brace yourselves: Theo is PRO-VESTS.
He breaks it down on his podcast. "Now I love a vest," he exclaims. "A vest is the only piece of clothing that you can look sharp and catch a football at the same time. Comfortably, okay?" He pauses for a split second as if to say, let THAT sink in. "If you wanna hug somebody and feel a little bit more of the hug than usual—THAT'S a vest."
He continues, "If you've been drinking all day or doing drugs or whatever and you don't know if you're supposed to go to a wedding or a rave, hmm, what am I gonna wear? A snorkel? No! A vest. And that's just a snorkel for your torso, baby. That f-ing vest."
Need more proof that a vest is the best? "If you're not sure if you're gonna be doing magic later on tonight," he says as he mimes doing magic, "Vest."
Krendl magician doing a card trick in Virginia. www.flickr.com
"The crazy thing about vests is… they remember your body shape. Not a lot of different pieces of clothing remember your body like a vest does."
He compares it to protection during intimate moments, claiming that a vest remembers your contours. "A vest knows if you're a man or a woman. A vest knows. You want to have a gender reveal party? Tie a vest up around that womb. A vest knows. A vest knows a lot more than we think it does."
Theo himself dares his Instagram followers to "name a better clothing." After many puns, including what good "inVESTment" vests are, no one in the nearly 1,500 comments can beat it.
Interestingly, Reddit has claimed the "vest" has made a comeback, as recently as last year. On the subreddit r/femalefashion advice, one person asks, "I want to buy a vest, but I really don't know if it's just for now. I know vests have come and gone through the years, but I just recently started getting into fashion."
This shockingly receives over 100 comments, with one responding, "Oh, it’s definitely trendy. It’s a big part of the 20-year fashion cycle — right now the early 00s are trendy again. But that doesn’t mean you shouldn't enjoy the trend! There’s no such thing as timeless fashion, and you should wear things that you like."
A woman dances wearing a Christmas vest.Giphy
Another Redditor offers this wise cautionary advice: "Vests can be a hard piece to pull off. The popular ones right now are an easy entry point, which is cool for folks wanting to experiment with their style. But I only see these types of vests being classic staples for a small amount of folk. So the vests everyone is wearing are trends, but not the article of clothing itself."
And this person really opposes the idea: "Girl, trendy. They were hot in the mid-late 90s and we wore them then for a few years and then haven’t seen them since. You’ll wear it a few times before the trend evolves (brocade floral vests instead of oatmeal blah linen vests?) and then after that it will be gone completely for another 20–30 years. Timeless is a myth."
Theo would probably answer that with, "You know what's not a myth? Vests."
Billie Eilish says Instagram comments were ruining her life. So she quit reading them. Smart.
Billie Eilish has gone from being a pop star to a superstar over the course of about a year. Her meteoric rise to fame has forced her to reevaluate how she deals with her fans online.
She used to be happy to read the comments on her Instagram feed, but the tone of the posts has become exceedingly negative. So she's decided to stop reading them altogether.
According to psychologists, that's a very good idea.
Eilish admitted she quit reading the comments during an interview with Louise Minchin from the BBC where she was joined by her brother, writer and producer, Finneas.
"Do you still read everything that's on Instagram?" Minchin asked.
"No, no. I stopped like two days ago," Billie responded. "Literally two days ago. I've stopped reading comments fully. Because it was ruining my life. It's weird. The cooler the things you get to do are, the more people hate you. It's crazy."
"How do you make it better?" the interviewer asked.
"The internet is a bunch of trolls. And the problem is that a lot of it is really funny," Billie said.
"Everyone is much braver behind a cell phone screen than they would be if they walked down the street," Finneas added.
"It's way worse than it's ever been right now," Billie admitted.
"It's insane that I even have been reading comments up until this point. I should've stopped long ago, it's just the problem is I've always wanted to stay in touch with the fans and keep talking to them, and people have ruined that for me, and for them. That sucks," she added.
However, the negativity Billie has faced online hasn't affected how she treats her fans in public.
"If I see fans anywhere, I just want to talk to them and be around them, because they're people. They're me! They're like other me's," the "Bad Guy" singer said. "They're like friends of mine, but the internet is ruining my life, so I turned it off."
Reading the comments on social media shouldn't be a huge problem for those of us who post things that are only seen by people we know. But for anyone in the public spotlight, being bombarded by negative comments day in and day out can be damaging.
That's because of a psychological trait called negativity bias.
According to Psycom's Margaret Jaworski, "We're more likely to register an insult or negative event than we are to take in a compliment or recall details of a happy event. The negativity bias can even cause you to dwell on something negative even if something positive is equally or more present."
Research suggests that it takes three positive comments to cancel out the effects of one negative remark.
Billie Eilish is smart to protect her own sanity by staying out of the comment section and not allowing it to affect her art or life. It's fine for the public to have access to her art but there's no reason she should be handing over her sanity as well.