John Oliver Is Begging You To Lie To Your Friends About Where You Went On Vacation

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I could totally get why someone would want to go to Antarctica. I didn't imagine it would be to perfect a penguin impression...

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Let's talk about Antarctica. I'm afraid it's been a week of bad news.

New research from Australian scientists says that tourists are threatening the Antarctica biodiversity with pollution and physical disturbances.

More than 40,000 people actually visit Antarctica every single year, and scientist says even walking on moss beds will leave footprints that could last for centuries.

Look. I know this isn't how I'm supposed to react to that, but that really makes me want to walk on an Antarctic moss bed, which is why Antarctica is in serious trouble. Environmental destruction is not enough to stop the tide of tourists and morning shows desperate for unusual travel segment filler.

You may not think of Antarctica as a vacation destination but apparently that's changing.

The number one reason that folks say they come on tour groups. To see those humanlike flightless birds, the penguins.

And then they... And then they cry when they're hungry...

Some of the freshest water you'll probably ever taste, because it dates back 400,000 years.

What are you doing?! Tragically, the Antarctic ice shelf is rapidly diminishing. Now if you'll excuse me. So pure. So rare. That is the problem. I know we're not supposed to go to Antarctica. But there are free penguins and snow cones there. So they're going to have to launch a pretty strong anti-tourist campaign or we'll do it for them.

Antarctica, the majestic seventh continent. An unspoilt land of incredible ice formations that you simply have to see. And seeing as how you're looking at them right now, you have technically seen them. So don't come here. Seriously. You want to feel the bracing cold on your skin, stick your [bleep] in a freezer. You want see a seal up close? Here. Here's a seal up close. Now, here's a seal in HD. Now, it's in 3D. It's like you are actually here. Which, hopefully, you're not. Our point is you don't need to come here. Want to impress your friends by going some place exotic? How about Belgium? Have your friends been to Belgium? No? Then it's exotic to them. And if you simpy have to have ice, go to Alaska and tell them you went to Antarctica. They won't know the difference. Hey, guess which of these is Alaska? You don't know, do you? It's both of them. We don't care where in the world you go, just so long it's in this general area. Not here. Antarctica. Stop coming here.

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Another pitch-perfect video by John Oliver for "Last Week Tonight." There's so much more where that came from.

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