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First we had windmills. Then wind turbines. Now it's time to meet the Windwheel.

Those delightfully zany Dutch have done it again!

Picture this:

You're waking up in your beautiful new apartment, looking out on the canal it's situated upon. You sit at your kitchen counter with a cup of coffee, grab the stack of envelopes waiting to be opened, and peruse the invoices within to be paid. But one is missing.

It's the electricity bill.

You frantically search through your mail — and then you remember. You don't have an electricity bill. Because your new apartment is part of a giant circular "Windwheel" that not only generates enough power for your complex, but enough to power your whole town.

Waking up in this building would be such a trip! Image from Dutch Windwheel.

Does a giant Windwheel you can live in sound like a fantasy? Well, it's actually closer than you think.

It's a plan that's so zany it just might work, and its itty-bitty prototype is expected to be easily scalable to the sizes required for the head trip we just went on to become a reality. And it could be ready to operate and live in within 10 years.

How does this Windwheel thing work?

Here's a glimpse of the concept from the Dutch Windwheel company and the Delft University of Technology. Mary Beth Griggs explains in Popular Science:

"Horizontal beams will stretch across the center of the Windwheel. Thousands of nozzles located along them will spray positively charged water molecules into the air. When wind pushes the droplets against the beams' high-voltage electric field, it will create a negative charge.

The negative charge will form a current as the electricity discharges, much like when the negative charge that builds up in thunderclouds discharges to the ground via lightning strike. The electricity will then be converted from direct current (DC) to alternating current (AC) for use in the Windwheel or storage in an industrial battery."

Or here's another way of looking at that.

We know we can harness energy through mechanical conversion via windmills and wind turbines, like so:

GIF via TU Delft.

But these Delft University of Technology geniuses wondered if they could get the energy without the mechanical part. (Short story — they can.)

"We wondered whether it is possible to produce energy from wind without the conversion via mechanical energy. It is! By letting the wind move charged particles against the direction of an electric field. How does that work? This is an electric field and a positively charged particle. This can be any object that can hold charge. For example, a ping pong ball. But for the EWICON, we use water droplets. The electric force of the field moves the particle toward the negative electrode. Now when we let the wind push the particle toward the positive electrode, the potential energy of the particle is increased — similar to pushing a rock up a mountain against gravity."

GIF via TU Delft.

They're already using this technology on a much smaller scale and looking to improve its efficiency. Researchers think that with funding and more work on the design, it can be ready to go, in an affordable way, in a decade. And they're betting that making it a design that actually provides housing — yes, actually being able to live in one of the magical Windwheels — is a win-win economically.

Imagine going night-night in this place. Image from Dutch Windwheel.

It's also proposed, as shown in this diagram, that the Windwheel could have solar panels to enhance its energy production capacity.

Image from Dutch Windwheel.

It's not clear if this technology could eventually be retrofitted to benefit existing apartment buildings, and we're a bit too far from the actuality to start putting in a rental application for the first Windwheel apartment just yet, but...

2025 is the projected year that the Windwheel could be up and running.

Photo by Brendan Wood/Flickr.

And for people who are looking forward to seeing their electric bills go down (not to mention switching to cleaner energy), it won't be a moment too soon.

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5 small things that made us smile this week

Your weekly cheat sheet to the best of the Internet

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Life can be bleak, so we’re going to be celebrating the small joys while we can—whether that’s asweet snack that boosts your mood (courtesy of our friends atAll In), or a picture so incredibly goofy it restores your faith in the algorithm (even if only for a second). These momentary mood boosters are everywhere you look—you just have to be able to find them underneath all the noise. And that’s where we come in.

Consider this weekly web series your cheat sheet to the best of the Internet—not just random memes to make you laugh, but examples of people truly finding something extraordinary in the mundane. Each Friday we'll be delivering five pieces of media that allow you to stop for a second, take a breath, and feel just a little bit brighter among the daily stress. (Think of us as your chronically online bestie who knows exactly how to make you smile, exactly when you need it the most.)

Ready to smile? Here we go.

1. Unplanned triplets 

@murdockmultiples The first of many family reactions to our spontaneous triplet news! Telling my parents we were expecting spontaneous triplets 👶🏻👶🏻👶🏻 And yes my dad didn’t understand that “Baby B” meant twins at first 😂 #spontaneoustriplets #tripletreaction #triplets #murdockmultiples #murdocktriplets #surprisetriplets ♬ original sound - Murdock Multiples

Pregnancy reveals are always fun to watch, but this one is three times as exciting. In this viral TikTok clip, these new grandparents get exciting news when their adult daughter tells them she is pregnant with twins. But wait–there’s more. In what’s probably the shock of their lives, she then reveals that, on second glance, there’s a third baby in there. As in, spontaneous triplets. Three babies. Unplanned. Their reaction is both adorable and totally real: “I don’t even KNOW people with triplets!” Congrats, grandpa–you’re the people, now!

2. Little moments of morning joy

This week, the All In crew is polling people on the streets of New York City about small, everyday things in the morning that bring people joy, from gorgeous greenery to the early morning sun catching the light in just the right way. Just listening to these is making us feel super relaxed.

3. This teacher doing the absolute most for Pride Month

@joey_.veres Mr. Folnsbee the ally that you are @nadipowers @lanie @Fatty ♬ suono originale - 𝙎𝙊𝙁𝙏𝙇𝙔

Meet Mr. Folnsbee, a high school teacher from Horseheads, New York who’s taking Pride Month to the next level. In support of Pride Month (and, presumably, the LGBTQIA+ students at his high school), Folnsbee lets students bedazzle his head with rainbow gemstones—so much so that it looks like a giant, glittering Pride flag. Talk about setting a good example for the next generation!

4. The "goodnight" trend 

@sydsacks I’ve been cracking up at this trend so I made Peter call his besties to say goodnight 🤪 #goodnight #besties ♬ original sound - syd

Calling a friend and wishing them goodnight is a sweet gesture, right? What if the person you were calling was someone you haven’t spoken to in years, or someone with whom you’re just a casual acquaintance? That’s what people are doing in this new TikTok “prank,” and the results are so funny they’ll have you crying. They’re also so sweet, as the responses range from being confused but polite, to wanting to have a long conversation, to being genuinely concerned for the caller’s mental health. It might be a “prank,” but it definitely shows how much we all truly need human connection.

5. Spontaneous street singing

This could only happen in New York City. Instagram users @sabrinakvictor and @thecoryterrell — who were strangers before this video — shared a moment recently on a chance meeting in NYC when the two started singing the exact same song. Watch as the two of them vibe out to "Impossible" by James Arthur and try not to smile or sing along as you watch them (it's actually impossible). The joy here is actually contagious—and the harmonies are on point.

For even more “extra”-ordinary moments, come find us on social media (@upworthy) or on upworthy.com!

For scrumptious snacks that add an extra boost of joy to your day, be sure to check out All In.

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Sweet Golden Retriever runs into his vet at a bar and absolutely loses it

We wuvs his doctor.

@cosmo_andtheoddparents/TikTok

Nobody loves their doctor as much as this guy.

Not every dog might jump with joy after seeing their vet out in public. But for Cosmo the Golden Retriever, it was practically Christmas all over again when he spotted his own vet, Dr. Jones, at a brewery.

In an adorable clip posted to TikTok, we see Cosmo in pure, unadulterated bliss as he snuggles with an equally happy Dr. Jones, who, considering he’s still in his scrubs, might have just gotten out of work to grab a quick pint.

Watch:

@cosmo_andtheoddparents When you run into your vet in public #goldenretrieversoftiktok #vetlife #animallovers #petparents #goldenretriever #goldenretrievers #doglife #dogmom #dailyfluff #charlestondogs #doglover #charlestondog #brewerydog ♬ original sound - Cosmo

Ugh, the cuteness is too much to handle! People in the comments could barely contain their secondhand joy.

“He looked over like, “Mom, do you see who this is?” one person wrote, while another said, “What in the Hallmark movie? Adorable!!”

One person even joked, “Did we all check the vet’s hand for a wedding ring? (Said as a married woman. Looking out for you all, or something.)”

According to Hannah Dweikat, Cosmo’s owner, the two actually share quite a history. She tells Upworthy that when Cosmo was but a wee pup, he “gave a scare” after eating a Sago Palm seed, which are highly toxic to dogs, from a plant in their backyard, which of course resulted in him being rushed to the animal hospital and staying there over the weekend.

While that’s every pet owner’s worst nightmare, and certainly a scary situation for the poor fur baby, Dweikat says that “the calm and patient demeanor” of Dr. Jones and his staff put Cosmo at ease. And because of this, “Cosmo has always loved going to see his friends—especially because they give him lots of treats and snuggles.”

Cosmo and Dr. Jones’ buddyship has also blossomed thanks to proximity, as Dweikat only lives down the street from the clinic. “Which means we get to see Dr. Jones and his staff out in public at times and Cosmo takes every chance he can get to say hi,” she explains. This time, however, she was able to capture it all on video. Yay for us!

What makes a good vet?

While not every vet, however gifted, will be able to elicit this type of reaction from their patients, having a calming presence like Dr. Jones is certainly a good sign for pet owners to be on the lookout for when shopping around for their own vet. But that’s not the only quality a good vet needs. According to Saint Matthews University, a vet also needs to have high stamina (both physically and mentally), as well as an ability to tolerate unpleasant situations (you can’t faint at the sight of blood or vomit), a high level of emotional intelligence (maybe all doctors should possess this skill, but especially those who work with animals), adaptability, a sense of enthusiasm, and finally, excellent communication skills.

Dr. Jones seems to have these attributes in spades, and his patients clearly love him for it. None so much as Cosmo, obviously. Though Cosmo, it seems, shares a fondness for many things, like toys, fishing, and paw days. what he doesn't love so much is waiting outside for mom to get her coffee.


@cosmo_andtheoddparents Wanna see how many toys I can fit in my mouth?! #goldenretrieversoftiktok #boombap #kendrick #kendricklamar #chubbybunny #goldenretriever #goldenretrievers #doglife #dogmom #dailyfluff #charlestondogs #doglover #charlestondog #sillydog ♬ original sound - Cosmo


@cosmo_andtheoddparents He decided he wanted a mud mask today #goldenretrieversoftiktok#airball #holyairball #dogsoftiktok #goldenretriever #dogmom #doglover #dailyfluff #doglife #charlestondog #charlestondogs #dogdad #dogdays #pluffmud #fishing ♬ original sound - Cosmo


@cosmo_andtheoddparents Paw day routine 🐾 #ad Thank you @pethroom.global @pethroom_angel for the paw care kit! My beans are looking pawsome! #goldenretrieversoftiktok #goldenretriever #doglover #dailyfluff #pawcare #pawsome #doglife #charlestondog #charlestondogs #pawday #spaday ♬ original sound - Cosmo


@cosmo_andtheoddparents When mom goes inside to order coffee without you #separationanxiety #anxiety #goldenretrieversoftiktok #goldenretriever #doglover #dailyfluff #dogmom #goldenretrievers #doglife #charlestondog #charlestondogs #dogsoftiktok #doechii #coffee #coffeebreak ♬ original sound - Cosmo

If you’re in need of even more content featuring this precious pup, you can follow Cosmo on both TikTok and Instagram.

This article originally appeared in February

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Disney France employees bravely interrupt a wedding when they noticed the age of the 'bride'

The elaborate wedding is believed to be for a social media account.

Photo credit: Canva

Disneyland employees bravely stop wedding due to bride's age

No matter where on earth you visit Disneyland, it's supposed to be the happiest place on earth. It's a slogan the park works hard to keep true for their guests who tend to return multiple times during their lifetime. There's nothing like seeing Mickey, Minnie, Goofy or the Disney princesses up close and personal while walking to your next amusement park ride. But recently at Disneyland Paris, there was a scene no one was prepared to witness.

The park was reserved during the wee hours of the morning for a beautifully elaborate wedding, complete with a wedding cake shaped like Aurora's castle. Weddings are not unusual at the Disney parks due to the promise of magic on your special day complete with a princess castle in the background. Except, it became clear to Disney employees that this wedding wasn't typical as the guests began to settle and the bride and groom were visible. The groom was what you'd expect, a man in his 20s awaiting his blushing bride, but instead of a 20-something bride, it was a nine-year-old girl.

Disneyland Paris; Disneyland wedding; Disneyland fake wedding; child bride; child bride prankEnchanting castle under dramatic skies.Photo credit: Canva

Yes, to the horror of the Disneyland employees, the bride was a young child doing the wedding march towards a grown man. Instead of continuing with their duties at the park, the employees immediately jumped into action to interrupt the wedding and call authorities. The Disneyland employees weren't sure if this was supposed to be real or an expensive, elaborate joke, and they didn't waste time trying to figure it out.

Several people involved in the planning of the wedding were arrested including the child's 41-year-old mother, according to several outlets. Disneyland employees believed the booking was for a real wedding but when they saw the child in a wedding dress with high heels taped to her feet, they knew intervention was needed. The police arrived to conduct interviews and take those responsible into custody, which is when they found out the child and her mother recently flew to France from Ukraine.

The girl's mother informed the police that the $130,000 wedding was only to make her daughter "feel like a princess" according to France 24. But the "groom" who is a 22-year-old British man tellsThe Times that the mock wedding was to make a video for social media. It seems that none of the more than 100 guests were aware that the "wedding" was for a child to marry an adult man. They were paid to attend a rehearsal for a Disneyland Paris wedding according to France 24.

The Times reveals that the guests were recruited online with an ad seeking 100 adults and 100 children aged five to 15 to play guests at a rehearsal for a wedding.

Disneyland Paris; Disneyland wedding; Disneyland fake wedding; child bride; child bride prankSmiling girl in a white dress with floral crown and veil.Photo credit: Canva

Alexandre Verney, assistant prosecutor for the Seine-et-Marne département tells The Times, "Four people were arrested and questioned: the groom, who was believed to be the organizer of the event and is presumed to be British and aged 22; the mother of the child, a 41-year-old Ukrainian woman; and two Latvian nationals aged 55 and 24. It wasn’t a wedding but a staged wedding that was to be filmed with a hundred extras. They privatized Disneyland, claiming that it was a real marriage.”

In the end, the girl was deemed unharmed by a medical doctor which allowed for her mother and the 55-year-old man playing the child's father to be released. The "groom" and the 24-year-old woman who was acting as the child's sister are still in custody over possible money laundering and fraud charges.

There's no way to know what would've happened if the Disneyland employees didn't intervene, but thanks to their quick action, none of the shocked "guests" had to find out.

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Instead of buying a home, 22-year-old spends life savings on a chunk of raw Colombian jungle

Why fight traffic when you can live with the monkey and harvest avocados?

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A 22-year-old spent his life savings not on a house, but on a jungle.

There comes a time in every young person's life where you find yourself facing down the path laid out for you. All the things you're "supposed" to do: get a college education, land a good job, make enough money so you can save up and eventually reach the mountaintop of buying your own home.

The problem is that settling down and buying property has become ridiculously, ludicrously out of reach for a lot of young people. Price-to-income ratios are the highest they've ever been in the history of the United States, and many of the new generation of adults who have achieved the dream of owning their own home have found it to be... a trap! Yes, there are a lot of amazing benefits to being a homeowner, but it can also be a massive drain on your finances, your time, and your freedom.

One Gen Z man is documenting his attempt at doing things a little differently. Instead of investing in his first house, he spent his life savings on 7.5 acres of undeveloped jungle in Colombia.

Twenty-two year old Robert Lennox-Hvenekilde from Denmark has always been an adventurer. He's been filming his outdoorsy-escapades on TikTok for years. But a recent trip to Colombia left the Gen Z-er inspired to take his interest in nature to the next level.

"[I] realized that there were a lot of people living in these areas of the world who were maybe not rich in an economic sense, but they just seemed extremely free and to have an extremely high quality of life," he told Newsweek.

He decided to do something a lot of people only dream or fantasize about: he wanted to live in Colombia, among nature, and create a sustainable homestead for himself. So, after months of researching, networking, and negotiations, he was able to purchase three hectares of undeveloped land for about $40,000. That equates to roughly five or six football fields, for reference.

The jungle land Lennox-Hvenekilde now calls home features a fresh water stream, avocado and other fruit trees, and sugar cane.

He's currently building a small structure on the land to live in, and he plans to be a good caretaker of the land. Outside of harvesting fruit and avocado to eat and sell, he says he'll continue to plant and nurture native plant species to provide a habitat for the several species of endangered monkeys living there. Lennox-Hvenekilde also says his property came with special trees planted specifically for wood production, which he's using to create his dwelling.

"I would not cut down any of the native jungle," he says.

Watch him give an amazing tour of his new home here:

@roba_tron

Property break down #4you #foru #danmark #wildlife #nature #dk #offgrid

Nearly two million people were fascinated by the wild video. Many were inspired by a way of life they'd previously thought completely unattainable.

"Dream life"

"can i come join you... sounds amazing"

"Bro made the best decision of his live"

It looks incredible on camera: the vibrant greens of the rainforest, working with your hands instead of staring at a computer all day, never having to commute or deal with rude strangers out in public. Where do I sign up!?

Still, others had mixed feelings:

"Please take care of the land and his water. Is our job to protect our nature. Plant trees and native flowers," one user implored.

More than a few commenters were uncomfortable with an outsider buying up endangered jungle land in a foreign country, likening it to gentrification.

Lennox-Hvenekilde's response has been that it's better for someone like him to take a small piece of the land for living, and harvest and care for the rest. In comparison, mass farmers burn down hundreds of thousands of acres of rainforest every single year in Colombia to make room for their crops. In comparison, the 22-year-old's impact will be extremely minimal.

@roba_tron

Project Property #4you #foru #wildlife #nature #offgrid #cabin #adventure #danmark #dk

We've all had the fantasy at one time or another. Disappear, leave our entire life and Earthly possessions behind, and flee deep into nature. Live off the land. Create a simpler life for ourselves. Be happy.

In fact, interest in off-grid living has been steadily growing in popularity due to factors like rising costs, fierce political division, and an increasingly hectic and stressful modern lifestyle.

For most of us, though, the thought remains a fantasy. As appealing as it sounds, the idea of actually saying goodbye to our career, friends, family, and human pleasures is a little frightening. Worse is when we realize that living off the grid is a ridiculous amount of work. Sourcing our own food and fresh water? Having little to no access to medical care if we were to get injured or sick?

@roba_tron

Day 36 #4you #foru #wildlife #nature #offgrid #cabin #danmark

It took a lot of bravery for Lennox-Hvenekilde to take such a big leap the way he did. But his journey is not without its dangers. His viewers worry he might have run ins with the infamous Colombian drug cartels, which operate in the rainforest growing coca, which is used to make cocaine. And then there are all the bears, jaguars, and creepy crawlies.

"But how are the spiders?" one commenter asked Lennox-Hvenekilde. "Big," he said.

Yeah, on second thought, maybe that commute doesn't sound quite so bad.

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Gen Xer asking about Boomers' 'emotional immaturity' taps a multi-generational parenting issue

“If we don’t ASK about it or TALK about it, the problem doesn’t exist!”

Image via Canva

People discuss what it's like growing up with emotionally immature parents.

Parenting styles change every generation. Gen X parents didn't have technology (i.e. Google) to rely on to raise their kids, while Millennial parents today are all about gentle parenting. While Boomers have come under fire for being absent parents and grandparents, a common gripe that people have about their parents from all generations is their lack of emotional maturity.

In a Reddit forum of Gen Xers, member @Architecturegirl opened the discussion about emotionally immature parents. She explains that after reading a book on adult children of emotionally immature parents, she noted that while many Boomer parents have been accused of being emotionally immature--it really had nothing to do with their generation. "I had never really thought of emotional immaturity - like an inability to admit mistakes or preferring mind-numbing, polite conversation to meaningful connection - might be a generational issue," she wrote.

Rather, being raised by emotionally immature parents is a common multi-generational parenting issue--and many people have opened up about what the realities of being raised by emotionally immature parents looked like. Plus, they shared how they are finding healing. These are their most relatable stories.

mature, emotional maturity, emotionally immature, emotional immaturity, emotional intelligenceThis Country Comedy GIF by BBC ThreeGiphy

Stories

"In my house, the solution to any emotion-related problem (bullying, divorce, feeling disappointed, the fact that they sold my puppy during my birthday party so I 'wouldn’t notice,' and any/all lesser difficulties) was: 'if we don’t ASK about it or TALK about it, the problem doesn’t exist!' If got too big to be unnoticeable, the advice was something like, 'just ignore it,' and/or 'everything will be fine.' Or, the BLANK STARE: ie. 'I do not want to hear about this…we don’t talk about THAT…quit bothering me.'" —@Architecturegirl

"I had cancer and my mother told me she couldn’t talk about it because it was her biggest fear. Bugger my fears (I survived obviously and have been in remission for 25 years). Anything serious in my life she’ll just walk away as I’m talking or give a little laugh like she’s pretending to listen but has no idea of how wrong her reaction is to what I’m saying. It’s taken me 53 years but I’ve finally given up discussing anything of importance to me with her. They’re such a damaged (and damaging) generation." —@PuzzleheadedCat9986

"Among my friends and I who are Gen X it is a perfect 50-50 split between parents having emotional intelligence and those that don't. Two anecdotes: My wife's mother will still not say 'period' or 'sex.' They were 'the thing' (raised eyebrow) and the other thing (said in a disgusted tone). That was the sum total of the support my wife got. A friend grew up with a step father his whole childhood (bio father left right after birth). Step Dad was always detached and disinterested, and always drinking. Not violent, but not interested. When we were college age, his step dad got sober and realized what he had missed. Apologized and grew. Really made the effort to the point that in his late twenties my friend agreed to be officially adopted and changed his last name. Step dad is currently the most supportive and most present grandad of our group of friends." —@Mourning_Walk

silent treatment, emotional maturity, emotional immaturity, the silent treatment, giving silent treatmentWill Forte Silent Treatment GIF by hero0fwarGiphy

"My mother and the silent treatment are like 🤞🏽🤞🏽🤞🏽🤞🏽. I don’t think that woman has ever once used her words to express displeasure or disappointment, just a lot of huffing, puffing, slamming cabinets, eye rolls and going days without speaking. Her record was once 17 whole days! It was the most peaceful 17 days of my teenage life 😂." —@ThickConfusion1318

"My mom can’t take criticism. Like at all. If I say, 'Hey, you said/did this thing that really hurt me.' Her response is usually either to blame me and point out something completely unrelated that I did as a 'See? You’re not perfect either!', make excuses 'I meant something totally different than what I said, so it’s fine.', act like I’m completely overreacting 'You’re so over dramatic! You’re always upset over everything and I have to walk on eggshells!' Or to just get angry and start berating me for daring to bring it up to begin with. So it pretty much puts me in a position where I can’t talk to her about anything at all wrong in our relationship because she’s immediately going to take it as an attack and get defensive no matter how gently I word it. She always ends up upset and nothing is solved. So the best I can do is put distance and space between us to protect myself. And she keeps wondering why I never call or visit anymore." —@barb4290

"I am pretty sure that as a generation, millennials suffered from emotional neglect from our parents. For me it was just as simple as my parents being unable to show any type of affection and would avoid/refuses certain topics of conversations. my mom was pretty dismissive and acted as it was an annoyance for her when I got my first period. She acted similarly as I hit several milestone growing up and it just never felt safe to talk to her about anything. Also, my dad would throw tantrums whenever he would not get his way, then blame my mom." —@therdre

angry, anger, handle emotions, mad, emotionalAngry Inside Out GIF by Disney PixarGiphy

"Growing up, my mother was not able to compartmentalize her stress from her job as a public school teacher. Would take it out on me for not eating peas or something at dinner, and I'd end up being yelled at by dad because he'd always take her side. Didn't understand until I got older, and they're still together, but at the time I was like wtf you see this, its crazy." —@SeenNotScene

Healing Solutions

"'Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents' by Lindsay Gibson is the GenX guidebook to dealing with all of our trauma spilling out at midlife. This book / concept comes up often in this subreddit. Personally it helped me a lot." —@ND_Poet

"One thing I needed to come to terms with is that I cannot control my mother’s actions or feelings. Period. It was not my responsibility to do that. It was her responsibility to manage those things. It had been hers for a very long time, since way before ny sisters and I were even a thought. Once I understood that - not only on an intellectual level but an actual felt level, it became easier to make choices for my own well being. Boundaries. As others have said." —@Stop_Already

boundaries, setting boundaries, boundary setting, boundary, healthy boundariesJake Johnson Fox GIF by New GirlGiphy

"Here's what I have determined after raising kids to young adulthood. My parents did the best they could with the hand they were dealt. They did better than their own parents." —@Reader47b

"Finally, at age 48, I stepped away from their table, that I kept trying to sit at. I was trying to rescue them. Finally realized, I can't. They make the same amount of noise whether I am safe on shore, or jump in to the deep end and drown trying to rescue. Same amount of noise. And it does zero good. Put yourself first. Then your spouse and any kiddos next. That's it. It's ok to go low or no contact. It sort of hasn't mattered in my situation. And it's ok to grieve that you didn't have the parents you needed, and if you have kids, they won't have the grandparents they needed either. But you can be your parent (reparent yourself), and be the best damn grandparent if that is where you get to be. Break the cycle. You are worth it." —@redtail_rising

"One thing that helps me is to remember that it's not her fault she's like that (her parents were abusive - I don't think her emotionally capabilities developed normally). And keep my distance if she's upset about something. I am not her therapist, she cannot make me be her therapist, and I cannot convince her to go to therapy. Her mental health is not my problem." —@WhiskerWarrior2435

therapy, go to therapy, therapist, mental health, get therapyParks And Recreation Thumbs Up GIFGiphy

"The book 'Stop Walking on Eggshells' by Paul Mason and Randi Krieger is geared toward coping with family who have BPD, but it is a good overall guide on how to set boundaries and protect yourself against toxic/dysfunctional family, regardless of underlying pathology. Highly recommend. It allowed me to finally have a relationship with my mother that didn't leave me a mess after every conversation." —@UserUnknown

"I set hard boundaries and distanced myself from them as early as possible. I accepted that I was not responsible for their feelings or the outcomes of their decisions. I stopped trying to help/correct them because they didn't want to hear it and it just created friction/tension. I just came to accept that my parents didn't want to change/learn and that was a core aspect of who they were. And, even if they did want to, they didn't want to do so as a result of interactions with me because they were accustomed to a power dynamic in which I was subordinate to them and my being an adult wasn't going to cause them to forfeit any of that power." —@DerHoggenCatten

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A mom showed her Gen Z kids 'Ferris Bueller' and was surprised who they think the real hero is

Gen X and Gen Z apparently see the hero's journey very differently.

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A photo collage from the movie Ferris Bueller's Day Off.

It's really interesting what nearly 35 years does to the lens of perspective. When my friend invited me to join her family for their once-a-month movie night, she asked which John Hughes movie she should show her 14-year-old twins. The answer was obvious. It had to be something fun, school-related, and iconic. Ferris Bueller's Day Off seemed to be the perfect choice as we Gen X-ers loved it when we were exactly their age in 1986.

The fraternal twins (one boy, one girl) sat down on a rare early Saturday evening when neither had dance practice or a sleepover. We gathered in our comfy clothes, popped some popcorn, and hit "rent now."

They were excited by the opening scene, where an adorable Matthew Broderick (doesn't matter what generation one is, he transcends them all) is pretending to be sick in bed with worrying parents. His sister Jeanie is suspicious and exhausted by his antics, but Ferris prevails. He then proceeds to give a brilliant monologue about eating life up and living in the moment. His now-famous line, “Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it,” is still plastered in quote books and on Bumble profiles.

The twins seemed inspired, and one of them actually teared up in the first five minutes.

The opening scene from Ferris Bueller's Day Off.www.youtube.com, Paramount Pictures, Film Studies Fundamntals

Spoilers ahead: the movie is pretty simple. Ferris is a super cool high school kid with a beautiful girlfriend, Sloane, played by Mia Sara. His best friend is a depressed hypochondriac named Cameron, who is played to perfection by Alan Ruck. Ferris skips school a lot (nine times!) and grabs each day by the neck. There are themes of Hedonism, Nihilism, and Taoism, but neither of the twins mentioned that.

The first thing both kids DID bring up (after being delighted by the shower monologue) was how privileged the characters were. Affluent Chicago suburbs, after all, was the setting John Hughes knew best. They also noted, as many have over the years, that Ferris seemed rather selfish and insensitive to what others in his life wanted and needed.

Ferris Bueller, 80s movies, Gen X, Gen ZA Ferris Buellers Day Off Film GIFGiphy Paramount Pictures

There have been many conversations over the years about Cameron being the true hero of the film. He has a story arc, unlike Ferris, that is unwavering. He's sad, but pushes through it and even gets the guts up to stand up to his father after a Ferrari incident.

In fact, there was a theory that Ferris was a figment of Cameron's imagination—a Fight Club scenario, if you will. Robert Vaux writes on CBR, "The theory holds that the entire day is a fantasy taking place in Cameron's head while he lies sick in bed. His sickness actually supports the theory: once Ferris comes over, it vanishes, and Cameron plunges energetically, if reluctantly, into the events of the day. According to the theory, it's because there are no events of the day. He's still sick at home, and the whole thing is a daydream."

cameron, ferris bueller's day off, 80s movies, john hughes, gen x, gen zCameron GIF in Ferris Buellers Day Off 80SGiphy, Paramount Pictures

I fully expected the twins to have similar thoughts. If not the Fight Club part, at least the idea that Cameron was the true protagonist. But what they (both of them) said instead was shocking. "No," the daughter told me. "I mean, I liked Ferris and I loved Cameron. But it's Jeanie who's the hero here."

Jeanie, the sister mentioned earlier, was played with pure rage by Jennifer Grey. She spends most of the movie attempting to narc on Ferris rather than enjoying her own beautiful day. She is angry and determined until…she meets a "bad boy" at the county jail, played complete with bloodshot eyes by Charlie Sheen.

Taken aback, their mom pushed back. "Jeanie, the sister? Why?"

The son answers, "She just changes the most. She starts out, like, having it in for Ferris. Really, having it in for EVERYONE. And then she just like figures it out." The daughter adds, "Yeah, in the end she was rooting for Ferris. She came the farthest from where she started and she's the one who kinda saved him."

Jennifer Grey meets Charlie Sheen in Ferris Bueller's Day Off.www.youtube.com, Paramount Pictures, Tvoldy23

Gobsmacked, I turned to Reddit for more answers. In the subreddit r/movies, someone recently posted, "Something I noticed about Ferris Bueller's Day Off." They then proceed to drive the Cameron theory forward. "At the start of the film, Cameron is in bed sickly and not really confident in himself, but as the movie progresses, he starts to get more confidence, and by the end, he gains the courage to stand up to his father."

A Redditor replies with this thoughtful answer: "I've heard it called a flat character arc when the protagonist doesn't change but is instead the catalyst for those around them to change. It's hard to pull off but is often the most satisfying kind of character. Ted Lasso (especially in season one) is a good example."

Others echo that idea, offering up characters like Forrest Gump and The Dude from The Big Lebowski. They stayed exactly the same while the world or others in their lives changed around them. It's described on a YouTube clip as "The moment you realize the main character is not actually the main character."

The movie Ferris Bueller's Day Off is dissected. www.youtube.com, Paramount Pictures, CinemaStix

This would give credence to the twins' opinion. But I'd never heard anyone choose Jeanie before, and they weren't swayed by Grey's performance in Dirty Dancing because they haven't seen it yet. When pressed one more time, their answer didn't change. "No doubt, it's the sister. She should have a spinoff." Their mom was so proud and we all totally agree.

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