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A common ingredient in cosmetics is helping to lift rural women out of poverty.

This is shea butter. And you may not know it, but it's in a lot of products you use every day.

Left: Photo by gtknj/Flickr. Right: Altered photo by Kazuhiro Keino/Flickr.


Most people first encounter shea butter as a beauty cream, typically used for skin and hair products. But it's also a common ingredient in medicine, cooking oils, and even chocolate bars.

But perhaps one of shea butter's lesser known, but most important, qualities is this: It's helping to provide well-paying, consistent employment for women in West Africa.

While shea is a hot commodity, procuring it isn't easy.

Shea trees are plentiful in Western Africa, but they take decades to mature and produce fruit — anywhere from 15 to 40 years.

A grove of shea trees in Burkina Faso. Photo by Lionel Bonaventure/AFP/Getty Images.

"There's a nut, with a very, very smoothy, shiny surface," Rosanah Fung, General Manager of SeKaf Ghana Limited, a social enterprise connected with the shea butter industry, told Upworthy. "Inside that nut is a very small kernel shaped like an almond. Inside that almond is how people make shea butter and shea oil."

A woman holds shea nuts in her hands. Photo by Issouf Sanogo/AFP/Getty Images.

And harvesting and processing shea butter is a skill many mothers in rural West Africa pass down to their daughters.

The women will harvest the fruit from shea trees in their villages and make small batches of shea butter using their own home-taught methods.

A woman processes shea kernels into shea butter. Photo by Lionel Bonaventure/AFP/Getty Images.

But while the demand for shea butter — in and outside of Western Africa — is great, there are two problems: With each family using their own time-honored recipe and method, how do you make each batch consistent? And how do you keep up with global demand?

Enter Senyo Kpelly, a businessman from Southern Ghana who recognized the growing popularity of shea butter worldwide.

In 2003, he founded the commodity trading company SeKaf Ghana with his high school friend; at the time, it was mostly an import/export company. But the pair were having trouble setting themselves apart from the competition.

They realized shea butter was gaining popularity worldwide and decided to focus their energy on this growing commodity.

Because it's traditionally harvested and made by women, some call shea butter "women's gold." Photo by Lionel Bonaventure/AFP/Getty Images.

To learn all he could about making shea butter, Kpelly traveled to Northern Ghana. He settled in Tamale, smack-dab in the middle of a Sub-Saharan belt that runs from Western Africa to Uganda. It's a poor area with limited resources, but plenty of shea.

What Kpelly saw in Tamale opened his eyes to an opportunity to bring an African-made product to the masses and uplift women and communities in the process.

In 2008, Kpelly created the SeKaf Shea Butter Village to process shea butter on a massive scale using local talent.

The SeKaf Shea Butter Village brings women together in Kasalgu, a small village about 3.75 miles away from Tamale, to harvest and process shea fruit into shea butter.

Women who work at SeKaf can bring their babies and children to work with them and socialize while they process shea butter using a more uniform, consistent method.

The village is now a model for other shea butter villages in Ghana and Nigeria. Photo by SeKaf Ghana, used with permission.

Not only did SeKaf Shea Butter Village improve the quality of the product, the village is now a model for others like it in other parts of Ghana and Nigeria.

It also provides stable employment for thousands of rural Ghanaian women at the SeKaf Shea Butter Village and beyond.

The best part? The women, representing 22 communities in Western Africa, run the shea butter processing from beginning to end.

There are currently 3,215 women registered as shea collectors, who manage the process from fruit to kernel, and just under 200 shea butter processors, who turn the kernels into shea butter.

SeKaf buys both the seeds and finished butter from the women, meaning they get paid for the harvest AND for their finished product.

SeKaf Shea Butter Village women using fuel efficient stoves for the boiling stage of the shea butter process. "These stoves require less firewood and the chimneys divert the smoke to improve women's health and safety issues," Fung told Upworthy. Photo by SeKaf Ghana, used with permission.

The women at SeKaf are also trained to be certified organic suppliers. Having an organic, sustainable supply chain is not only good for the environment, it's also good for the women.

"If you have organic premium quality shea butter, you can get even higher prices," Fung told Upworthy. "The higher prices will trickle down to the women. So by going organic, we are paying the women an average of 15% premium of the market price for their shea nuts."

SeKaf is also piloting a financial literacy program to help their employees manage their income, save for the future, and gain autonomy.

Photo by SeKaf Ghana, used with permission.

The shea season runs about four months out of the year, so making shea butter is a part-time job, but the team at SeKaf wanted to ensure that the women have sustainable income year-round.

"If they need money, they have to ask their husbands, they have to ask their relatives," Fung said. "They don't really have any financial independence. So when you don't really have financial independence. You don't really have any power or agency, because you're always depending on someone else. You're indebted to someone else."

In two communities, the company is piloting Village Savings and Loan Association (VSLA) initiatives through their SeKaf Success to Sustainable Livelihood program.

Women count their earnings at the VSLA share-out event in June. Photo by SeKaf Ghana, used with permission.

There are no banks or credit unions in many of the rural communities, but through VSLA, the women can pool their money together where it can accrue interest. They also have weekly meetings and training on how to save and why it's important. An assigned record keeper helps them keep track of their funds, and the women can provide loans to each other for starting side businesses or sending their children to school.

"They haven't had opportunities for any literacy, let alone financial literacy," Fung explained. "...just because they don't have formal education, doesn't mean they're not smart. They're amazing."

And the women have been able to save a lot of money already! In the first year of the program, around 60 women were able to save 8,500 Ghanaian cedis (around $2,200). That's an especially impressive figure considering minimum wage in Ghana is seven Ghanaian cedis (around $1.80) a day.

The VSLA share-out event. Photo by SeKaf Ghana, used with permission.

SeKaf will continue to provide jobs for women in West Africa for many years to come.

Though he's helped revolutionize the shea butter industry in Africa, Senyo Kpelly's work is never done. These days, he's focusing his efforts on the environment and the sustainability of the business, particularly the decades it takes to grow a viable shea tree.

"[SeKaf Ghana and Global Shea Alliance] are working with many research institutes in West Africa, and we are working with the world agroforesty center," he told Upworthy. "So together, we hope to address the issue of the long gestation period."

Recently, Kpelly also launched Tama cosmetics, a high-end line of soaps, lotions, and body oils made with the SeKaf shea butter. The products are available in a few countries in Western Africa, as well as Saudi Arabia, the U.K., and Vietnam — and is currently testing in a small market in the U.S..

Photo by SeKaf Ghana, used with permission.

But even with the company's success, Kpelly's proudest moments still come from supporting and uplifting the women of his home country.

"I think my happiest moment is last month," he said. "The women said they are no [longer] poor."

Photo by SeKaf Ghana, used with permission.

And to think ... it all started with a kernel.

Joe grew up without stability. Now, he’s giving 10 adopted sons the home he never had.
True
Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption

Like many children who are placed in foster care across the United States, Joe’s childhood was marked by chaos and a struggle to survive.

Joe still remembers neglect and abuse being part of his daily reality. Often left to care for his younger siblings alone, Joe grew up far too quickly.


He and his brothers were placed in the New York foster care system at an early age. And when he aged out of foster care at 21, he had no family to turn to for support.

“Statistically, I should be in jail, or I could be dead,” Joe said. “But that’s not my destiny.”

Today, Joe is determined to change the trajectory for young people lingering in foster care … as an adoptive parent and as an advocate, raising awareness along with organizations like the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption.

A complex problem with an evidence-based solution

More than 100,000 children in the U.S. foster care system are waiting for a safe, permanent home. But the sad reality is that thousands will “age out” of the system between 18 and 21, stepping into adulthood without support, guidance or a safety net.

The consequences of this can be devastating. Youth who leave foster care without the support of a forever family are much more likely to experience negative outcomes, including homelessness, unemployment, substance abuse and early, unplanned parenthood.


Through its signature program, Wendy’s Wonderful Kids®, the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption is working to be a part of the solution across the U.S. and Canada. Through this program, the Foundation supports the hiring of adoption professionals — known as recruiters — who serve children most at risk of aging out of foster care, including older children, children with special needs and siblings.

Wendy’s Wonderful Kids recruiters use an evidence-based, child-focused model, identifying trusted adults in the child’s network who may be open to adoption — and research shows that it works. A five-year, national evaluation showed that children referred to the program are up to three times more likely to be adopted.

Changing the journey for a new generation

Xavier was 18 and at risk of aging out of foster care without family support when he met Joe.

“My biggest fear was that I was going to age out and not know how to be sufficient on my own,” Xavier said. But Joe adopted Xavier just weeks before he was set to age out of the system. In the years that followed, Joe adopted from foster care again. And again.

Today, Joe is a father to 10 sons, seven of whom were adopted with help from the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption.

“Meeting my boys has put them on a different path,” Joe said. “Wendy’s Wonderful Kids was a real support and guide to being able to do what I try to do: making sure they have the tools to survive.”

“For me, it’s been beautiful to see that [my brothers are] spreading out to go live their own lives,” Xavier said. “It’s something [Joe] has prepared us for. He gave us the mentality that we could do whatever we want.”

Writing a new ending

After aging out of foster care, Joe managed to defy the odds, graduating from college and becoming a school counselor. Still, despite his own success story, he knows that many children who spend time in foster care aren’t as fortunate.

Joe hopes providing a “home base” for his sons means a brighter future for them.

“Here, we have people you can call your family — your brothers, your father,” Joe said. “Everybody, no matter where they are, knows that they can come home.”

Learn more about the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption and how you can help find forever families for more children lingering in foster care right now.

middle age, woman, aging, bodies, getting older, study

If you feel "old" practically overnight, there may be a good reason for that.

Getting older is weird. You're trucking along, enjoying your middle-aged life, finally feeling like a real adult, when you look in the mirror one day and gasp. "Where did those wrinkles come from?" "Is that skin on my arm…crepey?!?" "Why am I aching like that?"

Somewhere in your mid-40s, you start noticing obvious signs of aging that seem to arrive overnight. You assumed it was a gradual process that you just hadn't noticed, but it sure as heck felt like it happened really fast.


New research indicates that may very well be the case. A 2024 study from researchers at Stanford tracked thousands of different molecules in people age 25 to 75 and found that people tend to make two big leaps in aging—one around age 44 and another around age 60. These findings indicate that aging can actually happen in bursts.

aging, age, old, growing up, growing old, 40s, 60s Simpsons Gif y.yarn.co

“We’re not just changing gradually over time. There are some really dramatic changes,” said senior study author Michael Snyder, Ph.D., a geneticist and director of the Center for Genomics and Personalized Medicine at Stanford University. “It turns out the mid-40s is a time of dramatic change, as is the early 60s. And that’s true no matter what class of molecules you look at.” The researchers assumed the mid-40s changes would be attributed to menopausal or perimenopausal changes in women influencing the overall numbers, but when they separated the results by sex they saw similar changes in men in their 40s.

@suddenly_susan_

The accuracy 🤣 #40s #genxtiktok #womenover40 #relatable

"“This suggests that while menopause or perimenopause may contribute to the changes observed in women in their mid-40s, there are likely other, more significant factors influencing these changes in both men and women. Identifying and studying these factors should be a priority for future research,” said study author Xiaotao Shen, PhD, a former Stanford Medicine postdoctoral scholar who now teaches at Nanyang Technological University in Singapore.

elderly couple, aging, age, growing old, aging in bursts Aging happens in bursts, scientists find.Canva Photos

The study included 108 participants who submitted blood and other samples every few months for several years. The scientists tracked age-related changes in 135,000 different molecules—nearly 250 billion distinct data points—to see how aging occurs.

The study may shed light on the reasons for jumps in certain diseases and maladies at certain ages. For the 40-somethings, scientists found significant changes in molecules related to alcohol, caffeine, and lipid metabolism, cardiovascular disease, and skin and muscle. For those in their 60s, changes related to carbohydrate and caffeine metabolism, immune regulation, kidney function, cardiovascular disease, and skin and muscle were found.

body, human body, anatomy, study, aging Research shows the body goes through specific changes in our 40s and 60s.Canva Photos

The study authors did note that lifestyle might play a role in some of these changes. For instance, alcohol metabolism may be influenced by people drinking more heavily in their 40s, which tends to be a period of higher stress for many people. However, the researchers added that these bursts of aging in the mid-40s and early 60s indicate that people may want to pay closer attention to their health around those ages and make lifestyle changes that support greater overall health, such as increasing exercise or limiting alcohol.

The research team plans to study the drivers of these aging bursts to find out why they happen at these ages, but whatever the reasons, it's nice to know that the seemingly sudden onset of age-related woes isn't just in our imaginations.

It's understandable that we worry about aging, as physical signs of aging remind us of our own mortality. We also have all kinds of social messaging that tells us youth is ideal and beautiful and old is bad and ugly, so of course we give aging the side-eye. But none of us can avoid aging altogether, so the more positive and healthy we are in our approach to aging, the better off we'll be, no matter when and to what degree aging hits us.

This story originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

stepparent, stepdad, bonus parent, blended family, father figure, parenting, parenting moment, viral video, heartwarming, wholesome, stepdaughter, calling dad, family love, gratitude, emotional reaction, car ride, social media clip, modern family, parenting win, feel good

Man hears stepdaughter call him "Dad" for the first time.

Being a parent is often a thankless job, and being a stepparent is usually even more thankless. But most parents show up and do their best to make sure their kids have what they need and feel loved. So when our kids do or say something to show appreciation, it melts our hearts—but nothing melts it faster than a stepchild calling their bonus parent "Mom" or "Dad" for the first time.

A creator named Shane posted a clip from a video showing his reaction to hearing his stepdaughter call him "Dad" for the first time. The full video was first posted in 2021, but when it was reposted as a clip recently, it pulled on everyone's heartstrings.


Why this “Dad” moment mattered

Shane and his wife, Liana, run the social media page Shane and Liana where they post silly videos pranking each other. But this video wasn't a prank. His stepdaughter, London, wanted to surprise him after wanting to call him "Dad" for a long time.

parenting, parenting moment, viral video, heartwarming, wholesome, stepdaughter, calling dad, family love, gratitude, emotional reaction, car ride, social media clip, modern family, parenting win, feel good Representative Image: A father daughter moment. Photo credit: Canva

She can barely contain her excitement in the clip, squealing loudly when climbing into the back seat. When Shane gets in the car, London knows this is her chance.

"Hi Dad, how was your day?" she asks.

How Shane has shown up for London

Shane turns completely around in shock as the heartwarming realization of what she just called him sets in. "Did you just call me Dad? Just made my heart melt to know she called me Dad," Shane says full of emotion.

London and Liana explain earlier in the video that Shane has raised the little girl since she was 2 years old. She didn't meet her biological father until she was 5, and he was only in her life briefly before leaving, so this was a big moment. Viewers under the newly re-uploaded clip revealed that watching the interaction made them just as emotional as Shane.


parenting, parenting moment, viral video, heartwarming, wholesome, stepdaughter, calling dad, family love, gratitude, emotional reaction, car ride, social media clip, modern family, parenting win, feel good Readers were in their feels about the video. Photo credit: Canva

"Idk how the mom ain't crying!?! I'm crying," Mari Morales writes.

Viewers shared their own stories

"This video hits me right in the heart and soul," Sarah Douglas writes. "My 'step' dad raised me from 7 years old. I’ve never met the sperm donor once, but my REAL dad is the one that chose to love me regardless of biology. Forever grateful for the real men that 'step' up to be there for us."

"So true the first time my oldest daughter called me dad I cried she’s not blood but she is mine no matter what," Timothy Evans says.

This article originally appeared last year.

Popular

15 old-school casserole recipes that feel like home for boomers and Gen Xers

Tried-and-true one-pan dinners from back in the day.

casserole, casseroles, casserole recipe, casserole recipes, gen x, boomers
Image via Reddit/MyDogGoldi

Vintage casserole recipes from Gen X and boomer childhoods.

Childhood dishes can take you straight back to your seat at the family dinner table. Comfort meals that were served there are uber nostalgic. And there is one dish represents the epitome of Gen X and baby boomer childhoods: casseroles.

These one-dish wonders were loaded with flavor and baked to perfection. Pulled straight from the oven to the dinner table, casseroles filled the house with the smell of unique home-cooked recipes.


And while most of us are eating casseroles today at Thanksgiving, Gen Xers and boomers grew up eating casseroles on the reg.

Here are 15 old-school casserole recipes that Redditors grew up eating, which are just as yummy today:

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Chicken casseroles

Fancy Fast Chicken casserole

"Fancy Fast Chicken is delicious and so simple. Line up chicken breasts in a casserole dish. Dump uncooked stuffing over top the chicken breasts. Pour Cream of Mushroom (Onion or chicken works too) and incorporate it into the stuffing. Top with cheese of your choice, and fried onions if you're inclined. Bake at 350 for 45min or until chicken is thoroughly cooked." - Applepoisoneer

Chicken Curry Divan casserole

"My favorite is Chicken Curry Divan. A friend made it for me in college 40 years ago and it is a favorite to this day. Never disappoints. Many people have asked me for the recipe over the years. My best friends kids now that they are grown have each approached me for it.

1 1/2 lbs chicken breast tenders cooked and cut into bite sized pieces
3 cups broccoli in bite sized pieces
2 cans Cream of Chicken soup
1 cup mayonnaise (must be Mayo)
2 tsp curry
Juice of 1 lemon
Shredded sharp cheddar (use the amount you like o like a nice even cover of the top)
3/4 cup crushed Ritz crackers
3 tbsp melted butter
In 9x13” baking pan layer chicken then broccoli.

Mix the soup, Mayo, lemon juice and curry together well, pour over chicken broccoli mixture evenly and smooth out. Sprinkle cheese over top evenly. Crush crackers fine, mix in melted butter well and sprinkle evenly over top. Cook at 375° for 25-30 minutes until bubbly and top brown. Serve with rice." - karinchup

Chicken and Rice casserole

"This baked rice & cheese casserole has become a staple in our house! It’s great as a side dish, or I’ll add rotisserie chicken and serve it as a main dish." - anchovypepperonitoni

Chicken & Dumplings casserole

"The secret of this is not to stir anything. That's what makes your dumplings. When you dish it out, you have your dumplings on top.
2 chicken breasts, cooked and shredded; 2 cups chicken broth; 1/2 stick of butter; 2 cups Bisquick mix; 2 cups whole milk; 1 can cream of chicken soup; 1/2 medium onion, minced; 1 cup frozen peas; 3 tsp chicken Better Than Bouillon; 1/2 tsp dried sage; 1 tsp black pepper; 1/2 tsp salt.

(1) Preheat oven to 350 degrees
(2) Layer 1 - In 9x13 casserole dish, melt 1/2 stick of butter. Spread shredded chicken over butter. Sprinkle black pepper and dried sage over this layer. Do not stir.
(3) Layer 2 - Sprinkle minced onions and peas over chicken
(4) Layer 3 - In small bowl, mix milk and Bisquick. Slowly pour all over chicken. Do not stir.
(5) Layer 4 - In medium bowl, whisk together 2 cups of chicken broth, chicken bouillon, and soup. Once blended, slowly pour over the Bisquick layer. Do not stir.
(6) Bake casserole for 30-40 minutes, or until the top is golden brown." - Superb_Yak7074

Chicken broccoli casserole

"I made chicken broccoli casserole last week and that's a favorite here. This is pretty close to how I do it." - gimmethelulz

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Potato casseroles

Funeral Potatoes

"The unfortunately named, funeral potatoes!" - IRLperson

Tater Tot casserole

"Tater tot casserole. My mom made this at least once a week when I was growing up, but she added a quart of green beans to make it a meal. If you brown your ground beef in a good size cast iron skillet, you only dirty up one pan to make it!" - hcynthia1234, upperwareParTAY

Breakfast casserole

"I’m making a breakfast casserole this morning for brunch later—a bag of frozen hash brown potatoes thawed, a pound of sausage sauteed with peppers and onions, a brick of cheese grated, eight eggs beaten with a bit of milk and cream and some salt and pepper. Layer in a casserole, ending with cheese. Bake around an hour at 375." - CWrend

Hamburger pie casserole

"One of my childhood favorites. Did not add vegetables or cheese though. This was an end of the month struggle meal that everyone loved." - DarnHeather

Shepherd's pie casserole

"Shepherd's pie : brown 1.5 lbs ground beef with half a chopped onion, salt and pepper, drain it and then spread into a 13x9 and stir a can of cream of mushroom soup into it. Spread a drained family size can of corn on top, use a container of prepared mashed potatoes for the top layer. Bake for a half hour at 350." - ExplanationLucky1143

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Noodle casseroles

Tuna casserole

"Love my mom's tuna noodle casserole: 1 bag broad egg noodles, 1 can cream of mushroom soup, 2 cans tuna, 1 cup frozen corn or 1 can kernel corn, 2 cups shredded sharp cheddar cheese, 1/2 cup seasoned bread crumbs, 1 tbsp celery salt
Cook noodles per package directions, drain, then place in a 13x9 casserole dish. Mix in cream of mushroom soup, tuna, corn, 1 cup of the cheddar cheese, and celery salt. Top the casserole with the remaining cheese and bread crumbs. Bake at 350 for 20 minutes or until done enough for you." - Pinkleton

Mock Stroganoff casserole

"Mock stroganoff - brown 1lb ground chuck. Mix in 8 oz sour cream and 1 can cream of mushroom. Add to 1 lb of cooked egg noodles. Season with black pepper. Extras - fresh mushrooms and/or onion cooked with the beef. Any precooked veggies of your choice, peas or broccoli work well. Splash of Worcestershire, soy sauce, or fish sauce. Garlic or onion powder. Parsley, thyme, or cilantro." - Nathan_Saul

Cabbage noodle casserole

"I have a quick cabbage and noodles that uses bagged cole slaw. Cook a bag of noodles. Put aside. Cut up a lb of bacon and a med onion. Cook in pan until bacon is slightly fried and onions are clear. Add cabbage(without carrots) let sit 10 min or so. Add to noodles. It's so easy." - conjas11

@allrecipes

Thanksgiving prep class is now in session! 🍂🧑‍🏫 If there's one thing you need to nail on the big day (other than the turkey, of course), it's Green Bean Casserole. This recipe tastes just like the one your grandmother used to make, if not even better! 😋 Continue reading or click the link in the @allrecipes bio to get the full recipe. Ingredients: 2 (15-ounce) cans cut green beans, drained 1 (10.5-ounce) can condensed cream of mushroom soup ¾ cup milk 1 (2.8-ounce) can French fried onions salt and ground black pepper to taste Directions: Gather all ingredients. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Mix green beans, condensed cream of mushroom soup, milk, and 1/2 of the fried onions in a 1.5-quart casserole dish. Bake in the preheated oven until heated through and bubbly, about 25 minutes. Sprinkle remaining onions on top and return to the oven for 5 minutes. Season with salt and pepper to taste. Let rest for a few minutes before serving. 🧑‍🍳: Nicole #thanksgiving #greenbeancasserole #greenbeans #thanksgivingsides

Vegetable casseroles

Green bean casserole

"This is the best green bean casserole recipe, it does use the canned onions but you make your own cream of mushroom and it's soooo good. I've made it on random weekends, it's not just a Thanksgiving food. I don't know much about older foods, I just really wanted to share that recipe."

Corn casserole

"Our family Corn custard doesn't have crackers but we double the recipe and there's never any left over. 2 eggs, 1 cup of sweetened condensed milk, 1/2 flour, 2 T soft butter, 1 tsp sugar, 1 can of creamed corn, 1 can of whole corn. Mix all together and bake in a 8x8 about 45 min at 350. Gotta have that!" - Psychological_Bat890

Movies

The movie 'Step Brothers' gave incredibly insightful advice using just 4 words

Sometimes the most profound ideas come from unexpected places.

John C. Reilly, Will Ferrell, Stepbrothers, movies, comedies
Photo Credit: Canva, Adam Chitayat, John Bauld

John C. Reilly and Will Ferrell.

One never knows where they'll get a pearl of wisdom. Could be a fortune cookie, a spiritual retreat, or a self-help book. On rare occasions, it could even be an Adam McKay-directed comedy from 2008, starring Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly. In my case, that's exactly where I found it, and it was a treat to rediscover something so profound in such a (hilariously) silly film.

The movie is Step Brothers and the plot is not complicated: two men, both of whom still live at home near the age of 40, find themselves in a competitive situation when their respective mother and father get married, making them (ahem) "step brothers." Will Ferrell's Brennan and John C. Reilly's Dale proceed to take part in a lot of hijinks, wherein they fistfight, start businesses, play music, and defend each other's honor.


Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly's characters meet in the film Step Brothers. www.youtube.com, The Beard of Zeus

But—spoiler alert—it's near the end when Dale's father, Robert, played brilliantly by Richard Jenkins, delivers four words during a speech to them that are so heartfelt and simple, they resonate nearly 17 years later. The words were this: "Don't lose your dinosaur."

Don't. Lose. Your. Dinosaur.

It's the idea that, as we age, many of us lose the creativity we once had as children. The very magic that makes us unique should be guarded at all costs, and as we mature, we should make room for that inner child.

Many seemed moved by this piece of advice, especially its simplicity. One commenter writes, "That's one of the most important messages, actually! I have been trying to search for my dinosaur for long already because I remember how happy I was back then!"

Another notes the absurdity of the speech: "One of the best clips ever. When he said 'I'll go to medical school, and I'll practice for a little while, and then I'll come back to it,' I about snapped a rib laughing."

A scene from the 2008 comedy Step Brothers www.youtube.com, sofia sp

And here's a fun fact: in an appearance on The Rich Eisen Show Podcast, Jenkins revealed that the moment had been totally improvised. At the last minute, McKay instructed him to walk over to Ferrell and Reilly and "tell them you wanted to be a dinosaur." Jenkins was reluctant but gave in to the director's wishes, and it turned out to be one of the most iconic scenes in the film.

The fact that Ferrell and Reilly were taken by surprise by this speech was not lost on many of the people who commented. One YouTuber writes, "I love how Will and John's reaction to this is genuine. They're literally like, 'WTF is he talking about?'"

@thericheisenshow

‘Step Brothers’ premiered 17 years ago today, so we bring back this incredible story from when Richard Jenkins joined the show and told us that his “Dinosaur Speech” was 100% improvised 🤣 #stepbrothers #willferrell #improv



In a 2023 article by Health and Wellness Editor for Time Magazine Angela Haupt, she shares that while the concept of "inner child work" is buzzy, it's far from new. "Psychologist Carl Jung is credited with coining it about 100 years ago, and research has long suggested that the quality of our childhood relates to later-in-life outcomes."

Haupt goes on to explain how "finding the inner child" works, quoting Shari Botwin, a trauma therapist and author of Thriving After Trauma: Stories of Living and Healing. “We grow up, we get bigger, and our brains become more logical, but that doesn’t erase our thoughts, feelings, or memories from childhood,” Botwin believes.

Haupt indicates that one doesn't necessarily need professional help to connect to their younger selves. "It’s possible to work on your inner child by yourself; lots of resources exist, like digital and print workbooks and exercises, and a variety of podcasts. Journaling and meditating are often effective." That said, she argues, it can be extra effective if one works with a mental health therapist. "Experts say ego-state therapy, internal family systems therapy, and schema therapy are all proven approaches."

In whatever way one wants to couch it, the Jenkins "don't lose your dinosaur" riff really pulled the heartstrings of moviegoers. It illustrates that, even in a scatology-driven joke machine, brilliant adages can be found.

empty nester, empty nesters, declutter, decluttering, decluttering tips

Mom and empty nester shares her tips for decluttering her home.

Deep cleaning and decluttering a home is a daunting task—especially for empty nesters. After spending a lifetime creating memories and living together under one roof, doing a big declutter can take an emotional toll.

It's a milestone that many empty nesters know the sting of. And in an cleaning community on Reddit, a 51-year-old mom and recent empty nester shared her experience cleaning and decluttering her home after entering this new phase of life.


"In my entire life, my house has always been messy. I mean, I didn’t have a disaster-level situation going on, but if someone dropped by unannounced, it would’ve been super embarrassing," she shared. "When my kids were younger, we had a housekeeper because I just couldn’t keep up. Now that we’re empty nesters, I realized I never really learned how to keep house."

- YouTube www.youtube.com

She explained that the book Unf*ck Your Habitat: You're Better Than Your Mess played an integral part in helping her declutter—and offered eight helpful tips to fellow empty nesters looking to organize their new lives.

1. Put stuff away, not down.

Her first tip is the key to decluttering.

"Whatever you have goes right back where it’s supposed to go when I’m done with it," she notes.

2. Do laundry every day.

And she doesn't just wash and dry her laundry when doing it.

"Just one load, start to finish. Wash, dry, fold, and put away," she shares. "Also, no chair or floor laundry. It gets put in the hamper or hung back up. No clothes are ever out."

3. I make the bed every day.

The benefits keep on giving by doing this, she notes.

"It just makes my bedroom look cleaner and I smile every time I come in my room," she writes. "Plus we aren’t fighting over the covers when we get in because the bed is straightened out."

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4. Do a quick daily clean-up of commonly used spaces.

She cleans the places that her and her husband use frequently.

"I keep a stack of cleaning rags in my master bath because it’s the only bathroom that’s used every single day. Every night, I spray the counter, wipe everything down, put everything back (that my husband leaves out), and wipe the mirror," she explains. "I also wipe down the toilet. I find that I don’t need a huge, big cleaning of this space because I’m keeping it up daily. Same goes for the kitchen."

5. Dishes are always put away, cabinet or dishwasher.

No dishes in the sink or stuck in the dishwasher.

"Dishes are finished in the dishwasher? It’s emptied and dirty ones are placed inside while waiting for the dishwasher to get full," she notes.

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6. Don't neglect your shoes.

When she takes them off, they get put away.

"Shoes are put away immediately upon walking in the house," she shares.

7. Knock out small tasks.

There is no time to waste.

"If it takes less than 5 minutes clean it while you’re waiting for something else to get done," she writes.

8. Take no days off.

Rather than assign certain days for cleaning, she is constantly doing it throughout the week.

"Lastly, I do not have scheduled cleaning days. I just do something all the time," she explains. "My life is kind of unpredictable, we love traveling or going out for the day so my so called cleaning schedule would be shot to hell every time. It’s better this way, because now I never feel behind."