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14 unique 'body muses' celebrate their bodies for what they do — not what they look like.

"We hope ... each diverse story will topple the idea that there is one body narrative we should all aspire to."

What's the difference between focusing on what your body does...

Images via iStock.

...vs. focusing on how your body looks?

A lot.

Clinical psychologist Stacey Rosenfeld told Mic that "mothers who help their daughters focus on what their bodies can do versus how they appear — a shift from body as object to body as subject — are likely to see their daughters develop a more positive body image."

Focusing on what your body can do = more positive body image.

Yes! To! That!

No to ads like this.

All images via mybodydoes/Instagram, used with permission.

But you see that sticker in the corner there?

It doesn't like all this body-shaming in the media, either. And using stickers like this is one way women and men are starting to tell a different story about what makes a body good.

My Body Does and its followers have started to place stickers over ads that tell us we should look a certain way to be happy.

NOPE. Image via mybodydoes/Instagram.

The platform of My Body Does started out as a sticker campaign, but it's transforming into a space for women and men to reclaim the story that gets told about their bodies. It's a space to celebrate every story, every body — and even to tell your own!

According to founders Jess Andersen and Ashley Simon:

"We started My Body Does because we felt assaulted by the sexist ads we encountered all over the city — especially in the NYC subways — and we wanted to place something over those ads that was more positive, meaningful, and something that made us feel like we were being heard."


Image via mybodydoes/Instagram.

My Body Does is exactly what it sounds like: a platform that celebrates all bodies ... and what they do! It's kind of awesome to see.

Multiple long-term studies have shown that losing weight doesn't necessarily make you healthier (YES REALLY). And on top of that, more studies have shown being called fat doesn't make children healthier — it actually makes them more prone to obesity.

This stuff has got to stop. How?

We need to start telling different stories.

In that crazy New Year's atmosphere of "YOUR BODY NEEDS TO CHANGE," My Body Does' vibe...


Image via mybodydoes/Instagram.

...is a nice alternative, I think!

"We realized that body positivity isn't just about body image, it's about all the stories we are being told about our bodies and what they should look like, act like, and feel like."

Founders Ashley and Jessica. Image via mybodydoes/Instagram.

To combat all the crazy stories we're told by the media about how our body should look, My Body Does started the #MyBodyMuse series on their Instagram.

They feature a real human being with a body (no ghosts, sorry) and ask them to tell its story.

"We see the series as a small way for people to claim their own body narrative. We hope that as the series grows, each diverse story will topple the idea that there is one body narrative we should all aspire to."

Here are 14 of the #MyBodyMuses, their stories, and their own personal inspirational sayings. What's yours?

Each person was asked a few different questions, from "What do you like about your body?" to "If your body was your friend, how would you describe it?"

Here are their answers. If you want to learn more about them, click on the links below their photos.

Muse #1

"I love that this body is mine. Whether I am dancing naked in the moonlight on the beach or eating ramen on my living room floor, it is my choice. I get to choose what I do with this temple, and that freedom is incredibly empowering to me."

Image via mybodydoes/Instagram.

"We think women in particular aren’t asked what makes them feel good or what makes them feel present in their bodies, so we’ve gotten a really positive response to that question."

Muse #2

"I love that my body never lies. I especially love my face and my taste buds. While there are times I wish an emotion didn't show, my face always does all the talking. Being able to wake up every morning and stretch every muscle is the best gift I can ask for."

Image via mybodydoes/Instagram.

Muse #3

"I love how my body lets me communicate with people not using words."

Image via mybodydoes/Instagram.

Muse #4

"I am inspired by teaching yoga to older women, even a 94 year old amazing lady whose mantra is 'I am alive and kicking!' Like many women, I often don't like what I see in the mirror, but I take a breath, put on my smile and am grateful for today."

Image via mybodydoes/Instagram.

Muse #5

What do you like about your body?

"I am learning to love everything about it. What I like most is its ability to support me no matter what. My body always loves me no matter how I treat it. I love that it gave me two healthy boys."

If your body were a friend, how would you describe it?

"Funny, supportive, and Uber flexible."

Image via mybodydoes/Instagram.

Muse #6

"I like the way my body moves. I like the way it absorbs music and lets beats and melodies run through every ounce of my being. And I like how my body tells me what it needs if I really listen!"

Image via mybodydoes/Instagram.

Muse #7

"I love all the ways every part of me feels alive when I'm dancing. I think dance is one of the purest forms of self-expression and connection to oneself and others; I'm so grateful my body urges me to do it whenever it can!"

Image via mybodydoes/Instagram.

"Over the last few years I've really started feeling more comfortable in my skin, largely because I've gotten better at moving towards the things that make me feel good (dancing, laughing, running, yoga, sometimes just loafing around) and away from the things that make me feel crummy (negativity; most women's mags)."

"Mainstream media is presenting one narrative about bodies (with some token diversity thrown in), that's so obviously damaging to our sense of worth that at times it's laughable."

Muse #8

"My body has been my partner in crime since day one. It's a world-traveling, cheese-eating, hug-giving, sports-loving, currently sleep-deprived, bundle of goodness and I wouldn't change a thing (not even these curvy hips)."

Image via mybodydoes/Instagram.

Muse #9

"I love my eyes, because they remind me of my mom's. I love my feet, because they take me places and help me dance. I love my boobs because they're soft and pretty and asymmetrical and make me feel feminine and powerful. I used to feel at war with my body, but now I try to honor and celebrate it as much as possible."

Image via mybodydoes/Instagram.

Muse #10

"I love that my body can sing and dance and make people feel something when they see me perform."

Image via mybodydoes/Instagram.

Muse #11

"I like that my body still lets me behave like a kid, hopping up onto countertops to reach high items, and exchanging piggy-back rides."

Image via mybodydoes/Instagram.

Muse #12

If your body were your friend, how would you describe it?

"She's that pretty needy friend that gets upset if you don't call for a while, and it's annoying because sometimes you need space. But then when you are having a breakdown she's right there and you remember all the reasons you love her."

Image via mybodydoes/Instagram.

Muse #13

What does body positivity mean to you?

"To me it means practicing gratitude for whatever privilege I can enjoy through my body; appreciating my senses, my mobility, just all these different abilities that enable me to explore and fully enjoy life."

Image via mybodydoes/Instagram.

Muse #14

"I love that my body is so strong and sturdy! I am a little clumsy and I sometimes trip, fall or roll my ankle. But because I have this solid, thick structure, I never end up hurting myself! And I just love my thick thighs that power me through so much! Whether it be running, hiking, biking and my favorite activity, dancing, my legs never disappoint!"

Image via mybodydoes/Instagram.

Don't you kinda feel better? It worked for me, that's all I can say.

Imagine a world where everyone, young and old, is able to describe what their body would be like if it were their friend. I know it's cheesy, but that's a world I wanna live in.

I'm sharing this because the stories these women tell make a lot of sense to me ... and they're what I want the people in my life to see and hear.

We asked the founders of My Body Does about what a new year's resolution should look like. After strongly stating that they're not in the "tell you what to do with your body or your life" game, they came up with this:

"At least commit yourself to begin the work of sifting through some of the things you think or feel about your body, deciding what's not for you, what's a story that has been pressed onto you from the outside."

Tell your body's own story ... and not someone else's version. That's a resolution anyone can stick with. No gym membership required. ;)

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Dogs really do have favorite people, and here's how they decide who it will be

Sometimes their favorite people don't live in their house.

Photo credit: Canva

Dogs really do have favorite people. Here's how they decide

When my sister's dog, Junior, was on this side of the Rainbow Bridge, I was one of his favorite people. This dog would get full body wags every time I came around, and we'd spend most of the day cuddled up with each other. Now my dog, Cocolina, behaves in the same way whenever my sister comes to visit. But what goes into a dog deciding who their favorite person is? Spoiler, it's not always the person they live with.

Like humans, animals have their own personalities. You might rescue a dog thinking it will be the perfect companion, only to have the furry adoptee spend every waking moment following your partner around. You could spend hundreds of dollars on vet checkups, new harnesses, treats, and all the squeaky dog toys you can find, but that still won't be enough to convince a dog to love you. Instead of showering the giver of treats with kisses, they make goo-goo eyes at the pet sitter. It turns out they have their reasons.

dogs; dogs favorite; dog's best friend; pets; people and pets; rescue animals Corgi cuddles spreading joy and smiles!Photo credit: Canva

Since our canine friends can't talk, we have to rely on the experts to explain what the deal is with how dogs pick their favorite human. Carol Erickson, a Pennsylvania SPCA animal advocate, gave a brief interview with CBS News Philadelphia to explain her take on how dogs determine their bestest, most favorite person.

"What it comes down to for all dogs is they decide their very favorite family member by who gives the most consistent, high-quality attention, play, and physical affection: ear rubs, scratches, that sort of thing. Dogs get positive associations from being around people who consistently provide positive experiences, including treats, meals, play that they enjoy, and remember also that early association in those first six months can influence who a dog may like better later on," she tells the outlet.

Rover backs up Erickson's claim that the first six months are crucial in determining who will become the dog's favorite person later in life. The website says, "Many dogs bond hardest to whoever cares for them during their key socialization period, which occurs between birth and six months." However, they later note that dogs can still be socialized appropriately even as adults.

The dog-sitting website also explains that it's not uncommon for people who are not the dog's primary caregiver to be their favorite person. Pointing out that physical affection is vital to dogs, if the mailman gives out head scratches daily but the owner doesn't, the mailman may become the dog's favorite person. While physical affection and treats go a long way for some pooches, those aren't the only things that get puppy eyes melting with love.

dogs; dogs favorite; dog's best friend; pets; people and pets; rescue animals Joyful moments with furry friends! 🐶❤️Photo credit: Canva

"While positive experiences play a big role, a dog’s favorite person isn’t always just the one holding the treat bag. Dogs also respond to emotional connection, tone of voice, and even body language. Their preferences are shaped by a mix of familiarity, trust, and how well a person understands their needs," explains Elle Vet Sciences. They later add, "Dogs also take emotional cues from us. If a person is stressed, loud, or inconsistent, a dog may be less likely to form a deep bond with them. On the other hand, someone who offers reassurance and stability often earns the title of 'favorite' without even realizing it."

In short, if you want to be your dog's bestie, being consistent with affection, actions, and even training and grooming will get you there a lot faster than treats alone. Dogs aren't trying to be persnickety; just like humans, they enjoy being around people who show them that they enjoy their company—and maybe some treats.

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Veterinarian shares 7 signs a cat loves you, even if it seems like they couldn't care less

What looks like aloof behavior in cats is often a sign of love.

Photo credit: Canva

Cats don't always show their affection in the way we expect.

One of the reasons so many people love dogs is that they usually make their bond with their favorite humans quite clear. Dogs wear their loyalty and affinity on their sleeve, whereas cats are a bit more...aloof.

Sure, some cats are affectionate little cuddle bugs, but many cats seem as if they couldn't care less about anyone, and even the snuggly ones can't be coaxed into affection if they're not into it at the moment. That doesn't mean they aren't feeling or expressing love, though. Some of the behaviors that make cats appear bored or disinterested are actually signs that they like you.

Dr. Sarah Wooten, a small animal veterinarian, shared a list of 7 signs that a cat loves you with Cats.com, and it might make cat owners feel better about their feline friendships.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

1. Slow Blinking

When a cat sits across from you and stares at you with sleepy-looking eyes, blinking slowly, it might seem like they're bored or tired. But those slow blinks are actually how they communicate peace and connection. "If you're seeing that with your cat, they love you," says Dr. Wooten.

2. Lap Sitting

One of our cats loves to sit in our laps, but only with her head facing away from us, which feels a bit impersonal. We'll take it, though, since sitting in our laps is apparently a sign of love.

"Not all cats love a large amount of body contact, petting, and things like that with humans," says Dr. Wooten. "Remember every cat is individual…but if your cat is a touchy-feely cat and loves to be touched by humans, then sitting in your lap for an extended period of time is definitely a sign that your cat loves and trusts you."

cats, pets, signs a cat loves you, kitties, animal behavior Cat sitting in a woman's lapPhoto credit: Canva

3. Present Dropping

If you've never had a cat bring you a dead mouse or the head of a bird or some other disgusting offering, consider yourself lucky. However, if you have, you should also consider yourself lucky, as it means your cat loves you. "Even though to us humans it seems pretty unsavory, to your cat it is a sign of love and dedication," says Wooten. Of course, it's not always dead animals—sometimes cats might bring you inanimate objects they've collected (which makes you doubly lucky).

4. Kneading Biscuits

The rhythmic kneading cats do on blankets, pillows, or their humans is a behavior that mimics what they did while nursing as kittens. "It's just a leftover instinctual thing that they do when they feel super happy and super connected," says Wooten. "So if your cat makes biscuits when they're near you, that is a sign of love and connection."

cats, pets, signs a cat loves you, kitties, animal behavior Cat making biscuitsPhoto credit: Canva

5. Purring

This one might seem like a no-brainer, but purring doesn't always mean affection. Cats purr for many reasons, including happiness or contentment, but also for pain or sickness.

"But if your cat's just hanging out at home and they're near you, and suddenly you hear the motor go on, that's a pretty good sign that they love you," says Wooten.

6. Rubbing or "Bunting"

If a cat comes up and rubs its face or body on you, that's a sign of love and connection. It's called bunting, and essentially, it's how the cat marks you as "theirs."

"Cats have scent markers in their paws, they have them on their face…and they also have them on the base of their tail," says Wooten. "So what cats will often do is they will rub their paws or their face or their tail on the people that they love and consider to be their property."

cats, pets, signs a cat loves you, kitties, animal behavior Who knew yawning and stretching could be a sign of love?Photo credit: Canva

7. Yawning and Stretching

Much like slow blinking, yawning, and stretching may easily be mistaken for sleepiness, but there's often more to it than that. It's a sign that they are comfy around you. "Especially if they're sleeping, if they see you [and] suddenly they get up, maybe they meow at you and then they yawn and they stretch, they get everything all good and feeling good, and then they come hang out with you, it's a sign of love," says Wooten. "That's a sign that they're very comfortable and that they're very happy to see you."

Cats may appear to be standoffish or only affectionate when they feel like it, but it could be that they are showing you they love you in ways that you might not recognize. Cats can be a lot harder to read than dogs, but they really do love us—just not always in the ways we expect.

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These 4 words can keep a conversation flowing forever no matter how bad you are at small talk

There's literally no way to screw this up.

Credit: Canva

A couple talking over coffee.

Many people find making small talk to be an excruciating experience. They think it’s boring to talk with a stranger about the weather, sports, or weekend plans. They may also feel like they don’t have anything to contribute to the conversation, or they don’t understand the point of having one in the first place.

However, those who excel at making small talk have a tremendous advantage in their professional and romantic relationships, as well as forming new friendships. Most importantly, small talk is a window to transition into medium talk or, eventually, deep, meaningful conversations. The problem is that many people get stuck in small talk, and things stall before progressing to something beneficial.

conversation, friends, small talk, chatting Two women chatting in front of a fire. Credit: Atlantic Ambience/Pexels

How to get better at small talk

The great thing is that, like anything, making small talk is a skill that we can all improve by learning some simple conversation techniques. One technique that is great for keeping a conversation going, like hitting a ball back and forth past a net in tennis, is a simple statement:

"It reminds me of…”

A Redditor recently shared some great examples of how the phrase can be used to turn a mundane topic, such as the weather, into something much more fun:

Them: "It's been really rainy, huh?"

You:

Option 1 (Personal Story): "Yeah, it reminds me of a time I went on a run in the rain and nearly got hit by a car."

Option 2 (Music / Pop Culture): "It reminds me of every Adele song. When I'm driving, I feel like I'm in a music video."

Option 3 (Family): "It reminds me of my dad, he used to love playing with us in the rain as kids."

Option 4 (Thing you watched / World News): "It reminds me of this documentary I saw where they're trying to make it rain in the Sahara Desert.”

Option 5 (Place you lived): “It reminds me of when I lived in Australia, it barely ever rained there. I actually love this weather.”


- YouTube www.youtube.com

You see in this example that using “It reminds me of…” opened up the conversation to five potential new and more exciting topics. The “You” in the story could have responded with, “Yeah, it sure is rainy,” and the conversation would have ended right there. But instead, branching off the topic of rain into something a bit deeper took the conversation to the next level. You get extra points if you can take the “reminds me of” into a topic that you assume the other person will be interested in.

What’s a polite way to change the topic in a conversation?

Using “this reminds me of…” is also a polite way to move the topics in another direction, especially when it's a topic that you don’t want to discuss or one that makes you feel a bit uncomfortable. Or, if it’s a situation where the other person is monologuing on one topic for a very long time, this makes it easy to transition away from their diatribe.

conversation, small talk, chatting, cafe Two guys chat at a cafe. Credit: Helena Lopes/Pexels

Ultimately, the phrase is an excellent way for you to save the person you’re talking to from being stuck in the small talk rut as well. It shows you understand that when someone brings up the weather, they are merely getting things started with something both of you have in common. They probably don’t want to talk about the weather for 30 minutes, unless they are a meteorologist. “It reminds me of…” is an invitation to go a bit deeper and shows the other person that you’d like to learn more about them.

This article originally appeared in April. It has been updated.


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The surprising reason why some people are always late and some are always early

And what we can all learn from those who are right on time.

Photo Credit: Canva

A person rushes through the airport. A man looks at a clock.

English writer and theologian William Penn once famously said, "Time is what we want most, but what we use worst." Most likely, he meant that most of us squander the time given to us, as though it’s an endless resource. But, for the sake of this topic, let's also apply it to those of us who simply can't manage time properly.

We all have those friends who are shockingly, chronically late to everything—and those who are always early. (I'm the latter, and it seems to be equally annoying to the people in my life.) The question is why are we this way and how can we learn to co-exist? There are many reasons that contribute to how we manage time, and they of course depend on a variety of individualized factors, but one theory floating around is actually how full or empty we see the proverbial cup.

From an article posted on University of Southern California's School of Psychology site, it all comes down to our bias toward optimism or pessimism. For the late arrivers, it's called the planning fallacy. "Psychologist Daniel Kahneman and colleague Amos Tversky introduced the concept in 1979, defining it as 'the tendency to underestimate the amount of time needed to complete a future task, due in part to the reliance on overly optimistic performance scenarios.'"

In other words, they might feel it will all "flow" as it's supposed to, so there's no need to plan ahead. "Psychologists call this mindset 'optimism bias.' While being optimistic has its benefits, such as an improved state of well-being, getting caught in the constant cycle of optimism bias can cause issues at work that impact productivity."

In a piece for The Decision Lab, author Kira Warje,further explains, "Whether it's building a house, launching a product, or studying for an exam, people tend to create overly optimistic timelines and budgets. This happens because we focus too much on the best-case scenario and ignore relevant historical data or potential setbacks."

She also explains the notion that an outsider would estimate time differently, writing, "Interestingly, the planning fallacy only affects estimations about one’s own task completion times. Outside observers tend to lean in the opposite direction, overestimating the time needed to complete a task."

As for the early-arrivers, we perhaps overestimate the amount of time something will take. Often this is driven by anxiety in general, but to couch it in similar terms, this would be a pessimism bias.

In her article for VegOut Magazine, culinary writer and chef Maya Flores she shares eight traits that people who often arrive early share. One is "They have a physical discomfort with rushing." This, at least for me, is so true. And although early-arrivers often tend to pessimistically assess a situation, we are actively trying to avoid feeling the discomfort that comes with rushing.

rushing, planning, being late, anxiety, travel A person drives frantically. Giphy GIF by HRejterzy

Another trait Flores shares is, "They have a complex relationship with control." This doesn't imply they're "control freaks." Flores writes, "They've identified what's actually within their power (when they leave, how they prepare) and released the rest. That need for control over their own state—their calmness, their preparation, their transition time—remains non-negotiable."

And if one digs even further, there may be deep-seated reasons for it. "Many early arrivers have a story: the time they were devastatingly late for something important, a chaotic childhood where nothing started on time, or a formative experience of keeping someone important waiting. They're not necessarily traumatized, but they've decided: never again."

In the Reddit post "Is anybody else chronically, pathologically EARLY?" there are well over 400 comments, many of whom back up the theory that this began in our formative years. One commenter writes, "My mom was 10 minutes late for everything my entire life, and I’ve been mortified by it for as long as I can remember. It wasn’t a crazy amount of time, but it was for things you just can’t be late to, weddings, doctor’s appointment, jury duty, that kinda thing. I’m always early because of her haha."

clock, time management, being late, being early, planning fallacy A clock does its thing. Giphy GIF by MOODMAN

Another shares, "Same here. I spent so much time experiencing consequences for other people’s lateness or waiting endlessly to be picked up as if the person responsible didn’t know what time things ended, so I have just chosen the opposite. I’m rarely dramatically early, but I can’t be late to things that have a firm start time."

Then there are those who have mastered the art of being "exactly on time." In an article for The Expert Editor, author Lachlan Brown, discusses these folks, who retain traits from both groups. "They possess a heightened sense of responsibility" and "they value structure and routine." If one has these characteristics, without the anxiety that often comes with them (at least for us early birds), they can land somewhere in the coveted middle.


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Democracy

Pope Leo calls out hypocrisy, saying 'inhuman treatment of immigrants' isn't 'pro-life'

Pro-life means a lot more than just being against abortion.

via Edgar Beltran/Wikimedia Commons and U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement/Wikimedia Commons

Pope Leo XIV and an ICE officer arresting an immigrant.

The first American pope, Leo XIV, has weighed in on U.S. politics with a statement that cuts across partisan lines, drawing criticism from the White House. On Tuesday, October 1, reporters asked Leo XIV about plans by Chicago Cardinal Blase Cupich to bestow a lifetime achievement award to Illinois Senator Dick Durbin for decades of serving immigrants. Some conservative U.S. bishops balked at the idea, given Durbin’s long-time support of abortion rights.

The Catholic Church has a long history of supporting immigrants and being pro-life, so the Pope noted that those on both sides of the Durbin issue were being hypocritical.

The Pope explains what 'pro-life' really means

"Someone who says 'I'm against abortion but says I am in favor of the death penalty' is not really pro-life," Leo said. "Someone who says that 'I'm against abortion, but I'm in agreement with the inhuman treatment of immigrants in the United States,' I don't know if that's pro-life."

"I don't know if anyone has all the truth on them but I would ask first and foremost that there be greater respect for one another and that we search together both as human beings, in that case as American citizens or citizens of the state of Illinois, as well as Catholics to say we need you to now really look closely at all of these ethical issues and to find the way forward in this church. Church teaching on each one of those issues is very clear," he continued.

The Pope’s statement was an explicit critique of America’s conservative politicians and Supreme Court justices who wear the pro-life mantle when it applies to abortion, but support harsh immigration policies and the death penalty. The Catholic Church’s support for immigrants is deeply rooted in the teachings of the Holy Bible, which has over two dozen verses that reference why strangers and foreigners should be treated with care, dignity, and equality.

The Trump Administration's aggressive approach to immigrants—both undocumented and legal—has been one of the most controversial aspects of his presidency. Although he initially received praise for his handling of issues at the U.S.-Mexico border, his treatment of domestic immigrants through ICE raids, deportations to foreign prisons, and demonizing rhetoric is unpopular with a majority of Americans.

The Pope’s statement received a rebuke from White House Press Secretary Karoline Leavitt, a devout Catholic. "I would reject there is inhumane treatment of illegal immigrants in the United States under this administration," Leavitt told White House reporters. "There was, however, significant, inhumane treatment of illegal immigrants in the previous administration as they were being trafficked, raped, and beaten, in many cases killed over our United States southern border."

On a deeper level, the Pope’s statement exposes how many Americans are forced to reconcile their spiritual and political beliefs on significant issues such as abortion, the death penalty, and immigration. The interesting thing is that studies show that whether there is a conflict between their political party and the church, people tend to hold their political beliefs more closely. Ultimately, in calling for conscience over partisanship, the Pope asks Americans to embrace a higher calling by embracing humanity over partisanship.

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