upworthy

harry potter

Canva, @theisabelbrown/TikTok

Get yourself a nerd!

Historically, guys with a passion for comic books, Star Wars, or anything else that might have a fandom, haven’t exactly been the poster boys for the ideal love interest. But nowadays, it looks like nerds really do get revenge.

Because apparently, everything that makes a great nerd, also happened to make a great husband. At least, according to thousands of women on social media.

Married podcaster Isabel Brown recently went viral on TikTok for attesting that “nerds make the best husbands,” and that society just gives them a bad rep.

Brown made her appeal as part of a stitch with another woman asking how to find a man that are thoughtful, attentive, good fathers, and know how to “spoil” their wives.

Brown’s response? “They’re nerds.”


“It honestly blows my mind how we have this entire trope in American literature and movies and TV shows about the nerdy girl who gets the glow up when she grows up,” ranted Brown of the common theme features in famed rom-com classics like “She’s All That” and “Never Been Kissed, but we don’t say that for men!” Brown says in her video.

In her opinion, we should be taking those nerdy traits as “green flags.”

“Hear me loud and clear, if he owns a lightsaber — green flag,” says Brown. “If he has purchased a wand from the wizarding world of Harry Potter — greenest possible flag. If he has an unhealthy obsession with Ashoka Tano, you better run to the altar.”

Brown even allots “bonus points” to a guy obsessed with monopoly.

@theisabelbrown

Nerds make the best husbands. It’s a fact.

♬ original sound - Isabel Brown

But why does she think these traits translate into being good husbands? Because from her perspective, it means these men will appreciate their partner’s inner drives more, and understand heartfelt passions.

“Those little underestimated nerd boys grow up to be men who see what’s on here,” she says, while placing a hand on her heart.

Brown clearly wasn’t alone in her opinion. Several married women who had nerdy husbands of their own chimed in to agree.

“Mine has a LOTR sword and I knew he was the one after that,” wrote fellow TikTok creator Elyse Myers.

Another woman commented “I married the anime loving, nerdy gamer boy. Wouldn’t change it for the world.”

One even created her own stitch video showing snapshots of her husband as a kid (read: nerdy kid) and adult while singing his praises.

“She’s right. It’s the nerds…[My husband] is amazing. He’s sweet, kind, loving and an amazing father. It’s the nerds,” she insisted.

According to a male relationship influencer who goes by @urdivorcesurvivalguide, it’s being chronic outsiders that make nerdy men good partners.

@urdivorcesurvivalguide #stitch with @Isabel Brown ♬ original sound - UrDivorceSurvivalGuide

“Watching those beautiful girls [they’ve] always been attracted to” receive less-than-stellar treatment from other guys that are typically seen as more attractive provides a curriculum for “what not to do [in relationships],” he says.

According to some, however, this isn’t a foolproof dating plan.

As self-described nerd Justin explains, if a woman simply dates a nerdy man in hopes that it will make him a more loyal and dedicated partner, but doesn’t have any nerdy qualities herself and isn’t “willing to become part of that culture in some way,” then they won’t actually be able to build anything meaningful.

@ramblinglifter #stitch with @Isabel Brown ♬ original sound - Justin

While it’s true that shared interests can create deep bonds, many experts agree that it isn’t vital to having a fulfilling relationship. In fact, having a partner with opposite interests can help us grow into more well rounded individuals. What really matters in the long run is having similar values and ethics.

Still, to Justin’s point, it probably isn’t best to date someone simply for what they can do for you. You need to actually appreciate who they are.

All this to say—aside from general personal improvement, it probably isn’t necessary for you to change key aspects of who you are in order to become more desirable by potential partners. What really matters is being authentic and actually being ready to be a partner.

J.K. Rowling gets many, many messages from fans. But a particularly personal one got her attention on March 19.

"Dragging myself through another bout of severe depression and re-reading the 'Harry Potter' series to strengthen my Patronus," the fan wrote on Twitter, referencing the mystical, protective force that plays a key role in the series. "A million thanks to J.K. Rowling for the magical escape that's always there when it's needed."

Rowling, who often enjoys engaging readers online, was moved to reply.

Photo by John Phillips/Getty Images.


"Those stories saved their author, too," Rowling wrote. "Nothing makes me happier than to think that they went out into the world to do the same for other people. Keep that Patronus powerful."

A few minutes later, the author responded to another fan asking what other books Rowling has turned to when times get tough. "To tell you the truth," Rowling answered. "When I'm really stressed or overwhelmed I turn to biographies of people who've led turbulent lives. I find it soothing and inspiring to read about people who've endured and overcome."

Since living in the public eye, Rowling's been candid about her own struggles with mental illness.

In the years leading up to her "Harry Potter" success, a recently divorced Rowling was on the verge of homelessness, desperately trying to make ends meet for her and her young daughter. She felt like a failure.

"It’s difficult to describe to someone who’s never been there because [depression is] not sadness," Rowling once explained to Oprah Winfrey. "Sadness is not a bad thing — to cry and to feel. Depression is that really hollowed out feeling. And it was because of my daughter that I got help."

Rowling said her experiences with depression inspired the idea of Dementors in the "Harry Potter" series — dark, soul-sucking beings that drain their victims of all hope.

J.K. Rowling at a book signing in 1999. Photo by Tim Sloan/AFP/Getty Images.

Finding personalized ways to combat depression is key for many people living with the mental illness.

Self care is critical. And whether it's reading "Harry Potter" or biographies — or any other method to help you prioritize your own mental health — it matters.  

You deserve to keep your own Patronus powerful, too.

"I have never been remotely ashamed of having been depressed — never," Rowling once told a student journalist. "What’s there to be ashamed of?"

If you need help, don't suffer in silence. Call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at (800) 273-8255 or visit their website for more information.

Can you fathom the wizarding world of Harry Potter without Hermione Granger?

It's a thought that's horrified plenty of people online this week.

Gaining steam under the #WithoutHermione hashtag on Twitter, Potter fans discussed all the bone-chilling ways the series would have been different without its leading witch.

The consensus? The books would have been an awful, incomplete tale that left the magical world a complete mess.

Fans are pondering the unnerving premise thanks to an acceptance letter from Hogwarts' Professor McGonagall that went viral on Sept. 1.

"We are pleased to inform you that you have been added to the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry Waitlist," McGonagall begins. "Unfortunately, we are not able to allow you to come to Hogwarts at this time."

[rebelmouse-image 19530763 dam="1" original_size="750x971" caption="Image via The HP Alliance." expand=1]Image via The HP Alliance.


As the letter goes on to explain, getting waitlisted at Hogwarts wasn't a reflection on the applicant's abilities — it was a reflection of their gender.

"Around the world, thousands of girls are not permitted to attend school or are unable to finish their schooling due to discrimination, tradition, poverty, or violence," the professor noted.

The faux-acceptance letter was sent out by the Harry Potter Alliance for a new campaign in conjunction with She's the First encouraging supporters to use the hashtag to spread the word.

"What would the wizarding world look like without Hermione? What about without Luna? Or Ginny? Cho? Angelina? Tonks? McGonagall?" the campaign website reads.

"Hogwarts doesn't work without witches. Harry's story falls flat without heroines. Yet all over the world, girls and women are being kept out of classrooms and losing the chance to lead."

She's the First is focused on helping girls around the globe overcome the barriers they face in reaching graduation day.

Unique cultural challenges keep girls and young women out of the classroom. Factors like early marriage and high costs associated with schooling disproportionally affect girls, hindering them from gaining economic independence and pulling themselves — and thus, their families and communities — out of poverty.

"Girls are more likely than boys to remain completely excluded from education despite the efforts and progress made over the past two decades," a 2016 report by UNESCO found.

Photo by Stefan Heunis/AFP/Getty Images.

That's why groups like She's the First are so instrumental in making a difference.

The organization funds scholarships and mentorships for girls in developing countries, as well other basics that students need to stay focused on their studies, like medicines, school uniforms, and healthy food. And you can get involved too.

Share the Hogwarts acceptance letter on social media, learn more and expand She's the First's efforts around the globe, and stay up to speed on the issue by following Potterwatch — an online effort by the Harry Potter Alliance to promote a variety of social justice causes.

"If the Harry Potter series has taught us anything, it’s that back to Hogwarts means back to action," the campaign's website reads. "So hop on the Hogwarts Express — it’s time we make sure that everyone can get on board."

Comic book author Marc Andreyko was just going to bed late Saturday, June 11, 2016, when he heard there had been a shooting at a nightclub in Orlando.

When he woke up the next morning, he was crushed by the news. 49 people were dead, and dozens more had been injured in an attack on Florida's LGBTQ community.

A candlelight vigil in Orlando, Florida. Photo by Brendan Smialowski/AFP/Getty Images.


"I was horrified and sickened," says Andreyko over email. "As a gay man who was a teen during the AIDS crisis, I have seen far too much death and hatred and ambivalence toward it. Orlando hit me hard and I was flooded with the feelings of powerlessness I felt back then."

An accomplished comic book writer and seasoned storyteller, Andreyko knew that with his great power came the great responsibility to channel his feelings into something productive. Within eight hours, he announced on Facebook that he would be embarking on a new project in remembrance of the victims.

Together with dozens of artists, he put together a massive comic anthology about a single subject: love.

The book, appropriately titled "Love Is Love," is a massive collaboration between comic book writers, artists, and familiar faces, from Patton Oswalt to J.K. Rowling to comic book legends like artist Jim Lee.

Each contributed a single page of artwork, story, or dedication to the 144-page tome, and all sale proceeds will go to Equality Florida, an organization that supports the LGBTQ community in Florida.

The project even brought together competing publishers so that characters like Superman, Harry Potter, and the cast of Archie could appear in the book together despite exclusive contracts — all in the name of charity and goodwill.

"I think art can always make a difference," Andreyko says.

He knows that artists and storytellers have an important part to play in fostering conversations and a unique ability to reach people.

Comic books in particular have played a key role in media representation. Dozens of famous and recognizable characters have had LGBTQ storylines in recent years, including Batwoman, who's been openly gay since 2006 and whom Andreyko wrote for in 2013.

DC Comics also featured the first ever lesbian engagement in a comic when Batwoman proposed to her partner Maggie Sawyer. Image via DC Entertainment/YouTube.

"[Art] can make the tough and political more human and emotionally connected, and with the metaphors of genre, it can make people see things in a new way," Andreyko says.

Compiling the anthology was a long and arduous process, but Andreyko says that seeing the artwork every day kept him motivated.

"When things got emotionally tough or frustrating, all the art, the hard work, the expressions of love from so many busy, talented and generous folks, well, that was all I needed to keep moving forward," Andreyko says.

To purchase the "Love Is Love" anthology, check out IDW Publishing's website, and for more information on Equality Florida, visit their website.