Monica Lewinsky opens up about her powerful new PSA on 'Self bullying'
Bullying comes in many forms and Lewinsky is shining a light on people's biggest bullies - themselves.

Monica Lewinsky opens up about her powerful new PSA
Bullying is an issue that we all know well. We talk about the importance of instilling kindness in children and teaching them to speak up when they see someone being bullied. It's proven time and time again that bullying can be damaging - in some cases, deadly. This prompts all sorts of PSAs and anti-bullying campaigns but there's one type of bullying these efforts often miss.
Monica Lewinsky is no stranger to bullying but through all of her battles and multi-hyphenate titles she's achieved, there's still one bully she fights daily - herself. Well, Lewinsky didn't let her internal battle slow her down. While talking to her about her new project, a PSA on self bullying, she revealed where the idea came from.
"About ten years ago had to write down the negative things we said to ourselves and had to read them to other people," she explains before pondering why we're this cruel to ourselves if we wouldn't speak this way to others.
Self bullying isn't new and Lewinsky is sure to reiterate that she did not coin the term. This negative self talk is just something that seems to happen as we age, especially with the rise of social media where it's easy to compare your lived reality with the curated snapshots others share. Lewinsky contributes social media to more teens speaking to themselves negatively as well as more struggles with mental health.
"95% of teens use social media and more than a third of them report using social media constantly," she says quoting a recent Surgeon General's Advisory.
The producer also explains that there's a high correlation with poor self image, body issues and online harassment and the use of social media. Being armed with this knowledge, it made it important for Lewinsky to include a couple of young teen sisters in the PSA.
In the PSA, the exercise Lewinsky had to do a decade ago is used to make a statement on a larger scale. Having each person read the negative thoughts they have about themselves to someone else really brought home how harmful self bullying can be. But Lewinsky revealed an even deeper connection to bullying, self bullying and this mental health PSA.
"It’s an interesting intersection, my undergraduate degree, my major was in psychology so then to have the experiences I have. Literally the life altering year of 98 gave me more of an understanding, having the world reflect back to me these negative things I thought about myself," the social activist divulges.
Lewinsky expresses excitement for her dream of helping to pioneer "emotional trauma urgent care centers." These centers would be a place where people who may have just experienced an upsetting event can walk into one for immediate help.
"We give such immediate attention to physical injuries, why not emotional," Lewinsky asks.
Emotional injuries are sometimes much harder to recover from and understandably can sometimes result in self bullying. But when it comes to self bullying, Lewinsky believes people are less easily able to identify it, which is why she felt making this PSA was important.
"It’s not a concept that’s really out there but when we reframe an issue or reframe a behavior it helps," she tells Upworthy.
For those who are struggling with negative self talk, Lewinsky has a message for you.
"Be gentle with yourself, even around the process of starting to realize that negative self talk is bullying. I’ve been working on it for decades."
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There's a reason why some people can perfectly copy accents, and others can't
Turns out, there's a neurodivergent link.
A woman in black long sleeve shirt stands in front of mirror.
Have you ever had that friend who goes on vacation for four days to London and comes back with a full-on Queen's English posh accent? "Oooh I left my brolly in the loo," they say, and you respond, "But you're from Colorado!" Well, there are reasons they (and many of us) do that, and usually it's on a pretty subconscious level.
It's called "accent mirroring," and it's actually quite common with people who are neurodivergent, particularly those with ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder). According Neurolaunch, the self-described "Free Mental Health Library," "Accent mirroring, also known as accent adaptation or phonetic convergence, is the tendency to unconsciously adopt the accent or speech patterns of those around us. This linguistic chameleon effect is not unique to individuals with ADHD, but it appears to be more pronounced and frequent in this population."
Essentially, when people have conversations, we're constantly "scanning" for information—not just the words we're absorbing, but the inflection and tone. "When we hear an accent, our brains automatically analyze and categorize the phonetic features, prosody, and intonation patterns," writes Neurolaunch. For most, this does result in copying the accent of the person with whom we're speaking. But those with ADHD might be more sensitive to auditory cues. This, "coupled with a reduced ability to filter out or inhibit the impulse to mimic…could potentially explain the increased tendency for accent mirroring."
While the article explains further research is needed, they distinctly state that, "Accent mirroring in individuals with ADHD often manifests as an unconscious mimicry of accents in social situations. This can range from subtle shifts in pronunciation to more noticeable changes in intonation and speech rhythm. For example, a person with ADHD might find themselves unconsciously adopting a Southern drawl when conversing with someone from Texas, even if they’ve never lived in the South themselves."
People are having their say online. On the subreddit r/ADHDWomen, a thread began: "Taking on accents is an ADHD thing?" The OP shares, "My whole life, I've picked up accents. I, myself, never noticed, but everyone around me would be like, 'Why are you talking like that??' It could be after I watched a show or movie with an accent or after I've traveled somewhere with a different accent than my 'normal.'
They continue, "Apparently, I pick it up fast, but it fades out slowly. Today... I'm scrolling Instagram, I watch a reel from a comedian couple (Darcy and Jeremy. IYKYK) about how Darcy (ADHD) picks up accents everywhere they go. It's called ADHD Mirroring??? And it's another way of masking."
(The OP is referring to Darcy Michaels and his husband Jeremy Baer, who are both touring comedians based in Canada.)
Hundreds of people on the Reddit thread alone seem to relate. One comments, "Omfg I've done this my whole life; I'll even pick up on the pauses/spaces when I'm talking to someone who is ESL—but English is my first language lol."
Sometimes, it can be a real issue for those around the chameleon. "I accidentally mimicked a waitress's weird laugh one time. As soon as she was out of earshot, my family started to reprimand me, but I was already like 'oh my god I don’t know why I did that, I feel so bad.'"
Many commenters on TikTok were shocked to find out this can be a sign of ADHD. One jokes, "Omg, yes, at a store the cashier was talking to me and she was French. She's like 'Oh are you French too? No, I'm not lol. I'm very east coast Canada."
And some people just embrace it and make it work for them. "I mirror their words or phrase! I’m 30. I realized I start calling everyone sweetie cause my manager does & I work at coffee shop."
This article originally appeared in May.