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  • After the death of his wife, C.S. Lewis shared exactly how he dealt with grief
    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/C._S._Lewis#/media/File:CS_Lewis_photo_on_dust_jacket.jpgC.S. Lewis and wife Helen Joy Davidman.
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    After the death of his wife, C.S. Lewis shared exactly how he dealt with grief

    His wife, Joy, died of cancer in 1960.

    Emily Shiffer

    Author and lay theologian C.S. Lewis (short for Clive Staples Lewis), lived a full life steeped in education and literature. A prolific writer, Lewis authored more than 30 books across genres, including popular fantasy saga, The Chronicles of Narnia. Born in 1898 in Northern Ireland, Lewis would become one of the most esteemed writers of the 20th century.

    Professionally successful, C.S. Lewis found love later in life. He fell deeply in love with American poet Helen Joy Davidman. The two married in 1956 when Lewis was 58 years old and Davidman was 41.

    However, their marriage was short-lived. Davidman passed away from cancer in 1960 after struggling with tumors in her breasts that spread to her bones.

    Lewis’ resulting grief turned into one of his most personal works that he had no intent on publishing: a journal he kept following her death that would later be titled A Grief Observed. Lewis used a pseudonym to publish it, N.W. Clerk, which is a pun on the Old English for “I know not what scholar,” according to the C.S. Lewis Institute.

    Who was C.S. Lewis’ wife?

    Helen Joy Davidman was born into a Jewish family in New York City in 1915, and went by “Joy.” She was extremely intelligent (called a ‘prodigy), and graduated high school at just 14. She went on to attend Hunter College for her undergraduate degree and Columbia University for her master’s degree.

    She became a teacher and writer, and discovered her love and talent for poetry. She married a man named William Lindsay Gresham in 1942, and they had two boys. They officially divorced in 1954.

    Davidsman was an atheist but searching for God, and became a Christian thanks in part to reading many of Lewis’ books, including: The Great Divorce, Miracles, and The Screwtape Letters. When she read an article on C.S. Lewis in The New York Times by a writer named Chad Walsh in 1948, her connection to Lewis began.

    Walsh ultimately became her mentor, and he encouraged her to write to Lewis. She did in January 1950, and love eventually blossomed. They married on April 23, 1956.

    She had battled health issues for years, and discovered in 1957 that she had serious cancer. She passed in July 1960 at the age of 45.

    But their love had sustained them both. She wrote him romantic sonnets and he wrote to a friend, “It’s funny having at 59 the sort of happiness most men have in their twenties. . . [ellipses his] ‘Thou has kept the good wine till now.’”)

    Lewis’ grief journey

    Davidson’s death absolutely gutted Lewis. He wrote a beautiful epitaph for her:

    Here the whole world (stars, water, air,
    And field, and forest, as they were
    Reflected in a single mind)
    Like cast off clothes was left behind
    In ashes, yet with hopes that she,
    Re-born from holy poverty,
    In lenten lands, hereafter may
    Resume them on her Easter Day.

    Lewis famously compared grief to fear. He wrote in A Grief Observed:

    “No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear. I am not afraid, but the sensation is like being afraid. The same fluttering in the stomach, the same restlessness, the yawning. I keep on swallowing.“

    He candidly expressed his process through grief in relation to fear, explaining that he feared going to “our favorite pub, our favorite wood.”

    Lewis also wrote on fearing the future with grief: “This is one of the things I’m afraid of. The agonies, the mad moments, must, in the course of nature die away. But what will follow? Just this apathy, this dead flatness?“

    A Grief Observed is revered for Lewis’ brutal honesty about grief, including his anger and questioning of God:

    “But go to Him when your need is desperable, when all other help is vain, and what do you find? A door slammed in your face, and a sound of bolting and double-bolting on the inside. After that, silence.”

    As former president of the C.S. Lewis Institute Arthur W. Lindsley wrote in 2001, “the process was not pretty or easy. The path was much clouded by fear, doubt, and anger before the gradual lifting of the darkness and breaking through of the sun.”

    Lightness did come back to Lewis unexpectedly and gradually:

    “It came this morning, early … my heart was lighter than it had been for many weeks… like the warming of a room or the coming of daylight. When you first notice them, they have been already going on for some time.“

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  • A Sacramento ‘food desert’ is getting a transformative, first-of-its-kind public market
    Photo credit: Alchemist CDC – Jerk Street Tacos will be one of many local food businesses at Alchemist Public Market.
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    A Sacramento ‘food desert’ is getting a transformative, first-of-its-kind public market

    “We want this to be a place where neighborhood residents, visitors to Sacramento, and anyone who loves food and community feel welcome and connected.”

    Annie Reneau

    Picture this: A city neighborhood has exploded in population, from a few hundred people to more than 3,000 residents in just a few years. With a new $450 million soccer stadium being built nearby, experts expect that population to rise to more than 9,000.

    And yet, there are glaring gaps in the community. With no neighborhood school, library, or community center, people have few local public spaces to gather. And with a stark lack of grocery stores and restaurants, residents have found themselves living in a “food desert.”

    The nonprofit Alchemist Community Development Corporation has its finger on the pulse of this emerging neighborhood in Sacramento, California’s historically industrial River District. It also has an innovative solution to fill many of those glaring gaps: Alchemist Public Market (APM).

    Artist’s rendering of the front of Alchemist Public Market. Photo courtesy of Alchemist CDC

    A vibrant public space that serves as an incubator for new food businesses

    The first-of-its-kind public market will include a corner store that accepts WIC and CalFresh (California’s SNAP benefits program) and sells grocery staples and products from local makers. People will be able to connect at the market’s eating areas, co-working space, inclusive playground, and weekly farmers market.

    But APM will also provide opportunities for up-and-coming food entrepreneurs. The space will be home to eight small incubator restaurants in a shared food court, as well as a shared-use commissary kitchen that can support dozens of independent food vendors.

    Shannin Stein, Alchemist’s director of advancement, tells Upworthy that one goal of the market is to make sure people living and working in the neighborhood aren’t left out of the economic conversation as hundreds of millions of dollars are invested in the surrounding area. That goal aligns with Alchemist CDC’s long-time support of food entrepreneurs from underserved populations.

    Helping food entrepreneurs get their businesses off the ground

    Alchemist CDC has multiple programs that help support burgeoning food businesses, and APM will serve as an extension of that support.

    Nikki Gaddis-Chester, owner of Jerk Street Tacos, has been part of the Alchemist Kitchen Incubator Program (AKIP) for the past two years and looks forward to having a space at APM. She tells Upworthy that mentorship from Alchemist has “significantly transformed” her business journey.

    “This vibrant community has not only supported the growth of our small mobile food business, but has also equipped us with essential tools for developing and sustaining our menu,” she said.

    Jessica Brown, founder of Latin Caribbean culinary brand Caribe Azul, tells Upworthy that APM will be “a powerful opportunity for entrepreneurs who have the creativity, culinary experience, and drive to start a business but may not yet have the structure, knowledge, or support to build a strong foundation.”

    Brown has participated in Alchemist CDC’s Microenterprise Academy program, a 12-week training course for starting a food business.

    “I came into the program with a clear concept for my Latin Caribbean cuisine, but building a business can feel isolating when you are managing so many parts on your own, from operations to marketing and promotion,” she said. “What I experienced through Alchemist felt like opening a gate to a portal I did not realize I had access to, but that was always there. It helped me recognize the strengths I already had while giving me the structure to apply them with confidence.”

    An all-electric campus that fosters community around food

    The APM project aims to connect people to local agriculture and food businesses while also meeting the goal of environmental sustainability.

    “APM is being built as a state-of-the-art, all-electric, sustainably designed campus that reflects Sacramento’s leadership in environmental innovation, investment in local food systems, and community-centered economic development,” Stein said. “We want this to be a place where neighborhood residents, visitors to Sacramento, and anyone who loves food and community feel welcome and connected.”

    So-called “third places,” where people can meet up outside of home or work, play an important role in building community culture. Sam Greenlee, CEO of Alchemist, describes how local residents will be able to use the space:

    “Alchemist Public Market will serve as a heart for this emerging community. At APM, people can walk over to buy their grocery staples, and that includes people who depend on EBT and WIC nutrition benefits. Community elders can read the paper and chat over a great cup of coffee. Parents of young kids can meet up to enjoy delicious food while their kids have fun in the play area. Co-workers can go out to lunch and find enough variety to make everyone happy. Teens can come by after school, get a snack, and check out ping pong paddles or a basketball to play in the park next door. Families can meet their neighbors at the weekly farmers’ market, listen to local musicians during dinner, and celebrate after Sacramento Republic FC matches.”

    A community gathering space that serves as an engine of economic growth

    Alchemist Public Market broke ground in April 2026 with bipartisan support and significant public funding secured. Sacramento Mayor Kevin McCarty and Congresswoman Doris Matsui attended the groundbreaking.

    “Alchemist Public Market will drive economic growth, support public health, and transform a vacant space into a community center, increasing food access for the immediate neighborhood and fostering economic growth that will ripple across Sacramento,” McCarty told Upworthy. “We were proud to support Alchemist CDC’s Farmers’ Market access program and look forward to this all-electric market.”

    Greenlee concurs on the importance of the market as a driver of the local economy. “APM is going to be an economic development engine at the heart of our region for decades to come,” he said, “launching new businesses that represent the diversity of our communities, filling vacant storefronts, hiring neighbors, paying local taxes, and altogether making Sacramento a more vibrant place to live.”

    The challenges of nonprofit projects in tough economic times

    Of course, like most nonprofit organizations, Alchemist has had to play whack-a-mole with challenges since the market’s inception. The economic woes we’ve all experienced in recent years have taken a toll on the project and its organizers as they navigate the ever-evolving world of government funding, manage cash flow timing, and deal with dramatic increases in building material costs.

    “Community-based organizations are often expected to solve deeply complex social and economic challenges, but without the same incentives, flexibility, or financial backing commonly available to traditional for-profit development projects,” Stein said. “It can create a difficult dynamic where nonprofits are asked to prove success long before receiving the level of investment needed to fully realize that success.”

    Though construction has already begun, the project faces an immediate need for a bridge loan to move forward as red tape ties up funding disbursements. However, Alchemist is determined to bring the market and all it has to offer to life.

    “This project’s existence is the story of numerous almost-insurmountable challenges, and the tenacity to find a way through each one,” Greenlee said. “Early on, many people understandably thought the project was a bit pie in the sky; a great idea that seemed unlikely to become reality. As a non-profit, we have always faced challenges funding the next step of the project…But at every step in the process, we have demonstrated our commitment to see this project through, and we have found people stepping up to help us through each and every obstacle.” 

    You can find updates on Alchemist Public Market here and learn more about what Alchemist CDC does here.

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  • George Washington offered wise advice on why friendships should develop like ‘a plant of slow growth’
    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/George_Washington#/media/File:Gilbert_Stuart_Williamstown_Portrait_of_George_Washington.jpgGeorge Washington shared his advice on building friendships.
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    George Washington offered wise advice on why friendships should develop like ‘a plant of slow growth’

    He shared his wisdom with nephew Bushrod Washington in 1783.

    Emily Shiffer

    George Washington became the first President of the United States on April 30, 1789. Born in 1732, he was raised in Virginia and dedicated to the formation of the United States of America (after previously being called the ‘United Colonies‘.)

    Both his military and political service led to Washington developing many deep friendships throughout his life. He died at his Mount Vernon estate in 1799.

    “Among his friends, Washington also showed a capacity for intimacy and playfulness that was largely absent from his public persona as Commander-and-Chief and later president,” noted Cassandra Good, Ph.D. Assistant Professor of History Marymount University.

    Washington offered his wisdom on developing and maintaining friendships in his personal letters.

    George Washington’s friendship advice

    Washington had a large family and often shared his sage life experience with his many nieces and nephews. In the early 1780s, his nephew Bushrod Washington was studying law in Philadelphia. He would go on to become an Associate Justice of the Supreme Court, and inherited Mount Vernon (Washington’s famed estate in Virginia) after his uncle’s death.

    Washington offered his wisdom on friendship to his nephew Bushrod Washington in a letter dated January 15, 1783:

    “Be courteous to all, but intimate with few, and let those few be well tried before you give them your confidence—true friendship is a plant of slow growth, and must undergo & withstand the shocks of adversity before it is entitled to the appellation.”

    George Washington’s friendships

    Washington friendships were described as “selective, but often long-lasting, loyal, and integral to his public life.”

    In a letter dated June 15, 1790 to David Stuart (a man who became Washington’s close friend after he married his step-daughter-in-law), he wrote: 

    “I can truly say I had rather be at Mount Vernon with a friend or two about me, than to be attended at the Seat of Government by the Officers of State and the Representatives of every Power in Europe… “

    Washington gained friends through many outlets, including his Virginia social circle and his military service in the Revolutionary War. During the American Revolution, Washington met and became close friends with General Henry Knox, who would become Secretary of State.

    The two maintained a 25-year friendship, and Washington wrote of Knox: “there is no man in the United States with whom I have been in habits of greater intimacy, no one whom I have loved more sincerely, nor any for whom I have had a greater friendship.”

    Washington’s friendship with Thomas Jefferson

    One of Washington’s most notable friendships was with fellow Founding Father Thomas Jefferson. According to author Francis D. Cogliano’s book A Revolutionary Friendship (published by Harvard University Press), the two were friends for 30 years.

    Washington seemed to take his own advice on friendship when it came to Jefferson. They bonded over their love of theater, agriculture and architecture.

    “Their relationship evolved slowly, but they became close friends,” Cogliano wrote. “Each respected the other’s qualities, and they worked productively together for twenty years.”

    Unfortunately, the two would become estranged in 1797 after a letter Jefferson wrote a friend with “unflattering references to Washington” was ultimately published in Europe and America.

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  • Scientists finally uncover why old buildings feel creepy, and it has nothing to do with haunted spirits
    Photo credit: Canva – Man covering ears (left) Creepy old building (right)
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    Scientists finally uncover why old buildings feel creepy, and it has nothing to do with haunted spirits

    There is more than meets the eye…or ears…

    Heather Wake

    Many of us have walked into an old building and felt some kind of eeriness. Depending on your own personal beliefs, you might be inclined to attribute this feeling to the presence of something supernatural. But science has found another culprit that haunts our psyche in these places, and it’s not ghosts. 

    Researchers at MacEwan University in Edmonton, Canada, found that when people were exposed to infrasound, which is typically imperceptible to humans, they still experienced a rise in cortisol levels and irritation. 

    “In an old building, there is a good chance that infrasound is present, particularly in basements where aging pipes and ventilation systems produce low-frequency vibrations,” noted senior author Rodney Schmaltz. 

    old building, science, interesting
    Interior of an old building, Canva

    Therefore, many people who notice a mood shift in a place regularly defined as “haunted”  might attribute that agitation to something supernatural. In reality, the infrasound waves are to blame. 

    How the study worked 

    The study, published this year in Frontiers in Behavioral Neuroscience, randomly assigned 36 participants to one of four groups. Each group would listen to either “calming” meditative music or “unsettling” horror-themed ambient audio. Each group would also be near hidden speakers playing infrasound between 75 and 78 decibels, a range consistent with what mechanical systems commonly produce inside buildings. These speakers were turned off and on once throughout the study. 

    old buildings, science, paranormal
    Sound waves, Canva

    Each participant provided saliva samples immediately before the music started and again 20 minutes later, which were analyzed to measure cortisol, the hormone the body releases under stress. 

    Researchers found that, regardless of which type of music they heard, the participants showed a notable increase in salivary cortisol when exposed to infrasound. 

    And while anecdotal, participants in the infrasound condition rated themselves as more irritable, less interested afterward, and even described the music as noticeably sadder.  

    Interestingly, what people didn’t seem to feel when exposed to infrasound was anxiety or fear, but rather irritability, disinterest, and a low-grade emotional discomfort…all of which correlate to a spike in cortisol. 

    Infrasound in nature

    The researcher explained that in the animal kingdom, some species (such as elephants) use it to communicate with one another over great distances. Others, like some birds, detect coming storms from infrasound.

    Others still have an aversion to the discomfort it causes. Some fish have tiny stone-like organs in their inner ear that help them stay away from it and remain balanced and upright in the water. 

    sound, science, haunted house
    A school of fish. Canva

    Humans happen to have similar structures, and researchers theorize that this balance system, which connects to brain regions involved in emotion, may register infrasound without conscious awareness. 

    Still, given the small amount of study participants (as well as the lack of diversity, most were female undergrad students), no major conclusions can be drawn. So ghost hunters, fret not! 

    Whether you lean paranormal or skeptical, the science does confirm that humans are more sensitive to unseen forces than we realize, whether those forces come from vibrations in the environment or something we simply don’t yet understand. Either way, our minds and bodies seem capable of picking up signals long before we consciously recognize them.

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  • 15 years ago pro bowler Tom Daugherty was humiliated. He turned it into the sport’s greatest comeback story.

    Photo Credit: Canva Photos

    The bowler who scored the lowest total in televised history returned the very next year.
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    15 years ago pro bowler Tom Daugherty was humiliated. He turned it into the sport’s greatest comeback story.

    His score of 100 is the lowest that’s ever been televised.

    Evan Porter

    Everyone has bad days, even world class athletes. Any number of circumstances can cause someone who’s been training their entire life to simply miss the moment; be it physical, mental, or just plain bad luck.

    It happened to Simone Biles when she got the the “twisties” and became disoriented in the air during what should have been a pinnacle moment in her Olympic career. It happened to golfer Greg Norman when he squandered an unprecedented six-stroke lead at the 1996 Masters in a stunning collapse.

    The best athletes, and people, aren’t defined by perfection, however. They’re defined by what they do after they fail.

    Bowler Tom Daugherty puts on one of the worst performances of all time

    Bowling, while not a premier sport in the minds of most viewers, comes with a ton of pressure. It’s a highly technical sport where being just a millimeter or a fraction of a second off in your technique can be disastrous.

    Tom Daugherty found this out firsthand in what has became a legendary game…but not legendary for the reasons he’d like.

    In 2011, Daugherty faced off with Mike Koiveniemi in a semifinal match of the PBA Tournament of Champions. The event was televised, and the pressure was high. Luck, however, was not on Daugherty’s side that day. He rolled his way into every conceivable bad split you could possibly imagine.

    The round was a nightmare, and Daugherty found himself facing his final shot of the night with a score under 100. His opponent, meanwhile, finished with a 299—nearly a perfect game. For reference, a 70-100 is roughly an achievable score for people who only bowl a few times per year and are not trained at all in form and technique. Yikes.

    When Daugherty’s last shot connected, it put his final score at 100 exactly: triple digits. He reacted by running around and high-fiving the crowd, determined not to let himself get down.

    His 199-point loss is one of the worst margins in professional bowling history, and his score of 100 is the lowest that’s ever been televised.

    Daugherty did not let the humiliation define him, and came back stronger

    Through it all, Tom Daugherty kept an impressive sense of humor about what could have been the greatest failure of his career, to date.

    As the third place winner in the tournament, he won $50,000. He joked that he was excited to have won “$500 per pin.”

    Later, he was quoted as saying: “That 100 game was the best thing that ever happened to me. I have no problem with it. No one would remember me if I hadn’t bowled that game.”

    The positive attitude served him well. The very next year, he returned to another PBA tournament—this time the Bowlers Journal Scorpion Championship at the World Series of Bowling in Las Vegas—in his first televised performance since the infamous “100 game.”

    Daugherty won the whole thing, snagging his first PBA title.

    Since then, he’s gone on to have a fantastic career that features four PBA Tour titles, including one major title at the 2021 PBA World Championship.

    In 2026, he even got a rematch against his opponent from the famed 100-game—and beat him.

    Athletes like Daugherty give us a good blueprint for how to deal with failure

    Anyone who performs at the highest level of their chosen endeavor is going to fail and suffer setbacks. We can learn a lot from how they pick themselves back up afterwards.

    Kevin Chapman, PhD, clinical psychologist and founder of The Kentucky Center for Anxiety and Related Disorder, writes: “People who have a high standard for themselves understand that failure is part of the journey towards growth and success. On the other hand, people who are perfectionistic view failure as unacceptable, which is actually very limiting. When you view failure as just another part of the process, then significant learning can occur as a result. You fix it and then move forward.”

    It would be easy for anyone to implode after a performance like Daugherty’s. The way he handled the epic loss with humility and humor, though, no doubt helped him get in the right mindset for next time. He was able to learn where things had gone wrong for him in 2011 and come back a far better bowler the very next year when he won it all.

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  • Someone asked Gen X for their version of ‘OK Boomer.’ Here are the 8 best answers.
    Photo credit: Canva – A woman responds to the "OK boomer" catchphrase.
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    Someone asked Gen X for their version of ‘OK Boomer.’ Here are the 8 best answers.

    “Gen X does not crowdsource insults. We freestyle them.”

    Cecily Knobler

    Generation X is often known, or at least broadly categorized, as the middle child of generations. So many of us kept our heads down as we latch-keyed ourselves into empty homes to make Pop Tarts for dinner. Sure, we sometimes side-eyed our elders, but when we were criticized, our “Who cares?” response exemplified the cynical, proverbial shrug heard all through the ’70s, ’80s, and early ’90s.

    It’s almost a rite of passage for a generation to be besmirched by those who came before them. But when an older man went on a TikTok rant about Millennials and Gen Z in 2019, many of them didn’t take it especially well. The term “OK boomer,” though coined years earlier, went viral.

    Gen X version of ‘Okay, Boomer’

    Entrepreneur and mental health advocate Rafella Mancuso seems to have had it with Gen X. In recent post on Threads, Mancuso wanted to know what one might say to an X-er that was the equivalent of “OK boomer.” They wrote, “What’s the ‘Okay, boomer’ equivalent for Gen X? Because they’re p—ing me off.” What they perhaps didn’t anticipate in the responses was an entire generation that’s known for not caring, caring just enough to share their thoughts.

    The query received nearly 12,000 comments in just four days. In fact, one person even took the time to write a “community note,” and they didn’t hold back: “Did your therapist tell you that Gen X cares about your feelings? That’s adorable.”

    Some of the other comments were also on fire.

    Sounds like a ‘you’ problem

    “Sounds like a ‘you’ problem,” someone else comments. This one works on two levels: An apt Gen-X response to the OP’s question, and our version of “OK, boomer” back in the day.

    This Threader didn’t hold back, writing in part: “We’re latchkey kids who grew up with the Cold War, asbestos ceilings, and landlines. We have 0 fks to give about who is pissed off at us because we used them all up in the ’80s worrying about quicksand and the Bermuda Triangle. Now…share your phone number so we can prank call you.”

    We don’t care

    Another tried to gently explain to the OP why they shouldn’t bother messing with us. “The thing about boomers is they get mad when you say ‘OK boomer,’ so that is satisfying to you. Gen X has zero Fs to give…So my advice is to say whatever makes you feel better because we truly, I promise you, don’t care.”

    “Oh no, a random person on the Internet is mad at an entire generation for some unknown reasons. I guess I’ll just listen to the entire Nevermind album and not cry myself to sleep,” wrote another.

    This person seems pleased with the thousands of answersL “Checks comments. Sees my fellow Gen X-ers already have it covered. Nods and scrolls on.”

    One person notes that Gen X doesn’t need memes to be snappy. “Gen X doesn’t crowdsource insults. We freestyle them.”

    And lastly, a Threader decided to use the king of Gen X dialogue, quoting the great John Hughes film The Breakfast Club: “The correct response is: Does Barry Manilow know that you raid his wardrobe?”

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  • Wife prepares tongue-in-cheek slideshow for husband who ‘just got home from golfing’

    Photo Credit: Canva Photos

    A woman made a helpful presentation for the Dos and Don'ts when her husband gets home from golf.
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    Wife prepares tongue-in-cheek slideshow for husband who ‘just got home from golfing’

    “The hobby that is supposed to uplift you has made you tired and extremely grouchy.”

    Evan Porter

    In a relationship, sometimes you wish there was a tactful, helpful, and non-confrontational way to tell your partner exactly what you need from them.

    It turns out there is a way, and it’s been hiding right under our noses for decades: The humble Powerpoint presentation.

    In viral skit, wife makes instructional presentation for golfing husband

    The Dashleys—that is, husband and wife Dallin and Ashley—seem to really have their pulse on modern marriage. They’ve racked up nearly half a million followers on Instagram alone with extremely relatable and hilarious Reels that perfectly capture the universal frustrations people have with their partners.

    Charmingly, it’s all done with care, love, and a lot of laughs that help soften the blow.

    Recently, Ashley took some time to prepare a little slideshow for her husband on something that had been bugging her: how he came home from a round of golf with friends.

    “So you got home from golfing… now what?” the opening slide read.

    “What is this? he asks.

    “This is to help you golf more, without me getting annoyed,” she responds.

    Covered topics include coming home tired or cranky from a bad round. “At this point, the hobby that is supposed to uplift you, has made you tired and extremely grouchy,” she writes.

    The next slide covers what Ashley would like to hear when her husband walks through the door, featuring, “I missed you guys!!” and “What are we going to do today??”

    Finally, she asks him to devote a short monologue to memory, expressing his gratitude: “Thank you so much … is there anything that you need to do for yourself that I can facilitate now that I’m home? …My cup is full and boy did I ever have fun. Let’s make a plan and have the best day ever.”

    The skit is tongue-in-cheek, but has commenters nodding along in recognition

    All people in partnered relationships, even busy parents, deserve a little time to fill their own cup with hobbies they enjoy. That usually involves the other partner picking up the slack with the household and the kids; a trade-off many partners willingly make for one another.

    But men who golf on the weekends, at three to five hours per round in particular, seems to be a source of great frustration for many women who are left holding the bag.

    The Dashleys’ video racked up over a million views and tons of comments:

    “Oh so this is a universal experience”

    “Can we buy this PowerPoint presentation from you? I’d like to preset it to my husband”

    “Golf has to be up there as the most selfish hobby that ever existed”

    One commenter, in particular, did not hold back: “Mine actually does come home and go ‘what are we doing today????’ And nothing irks me more. Sir you’ve been gone from 6a-1p. Kids got up at 6:13a we did breakfast and I put in laundry, then walked/scootered to get me coffee and the girls got cake pops, then the nature center, then 2 different playgrounds, lunch, backyard crafts, and the 4 year old watered the inside plants so I had to clean, I’ve also done two loads of laundry and tidied so you don’t come back to a disaster because I’m considerate. You will be taking the kids out and leaving me alone now byeeeeee “

    It’s no bias against golf: many women chimed in to note that other “husband hobbies” like cycling or hunting should require similar rules.

    The Gender Equity Policy Institute describes the “free-time gender gap,” like this: “Across every group studied, men spend more time than women socializing, watching sports or playing video games, or doing similar activities to relax or have fun.  …The group with the least amount of free time is 35- to 44-year-old women. Men their age have a full hour per day more free time, and the free-time gender gap is near its peak at this time of life. “

    Joke presentation gives serious ideas for how to communicate

    A few observant commenters picked up on the fact that, while the video is a skit and the presentation isn’t meant to be taken literally, these are the kinds of conversations couples should be having with each other.

    While being the clueless “golfing husband” who doesn’t do his share with the house and kids is a recipe for disaster, so is resentment without communication.

    The Dashleys had a similar hit video about “What mom doesn’t want for mothers day.” It’s hilarious, but also full of helpful insights that couples should be sharing regularly.

    One commenter summed the golf presentation up perfectly: “All jokes aside, this is an amazing way to ask your partner for what you want while supporting each other as individuals!”

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  • Hair salons in Europe are dumping their clippings into forests and it’s miraculous
    Photo credit: Canva – Hair getting cut (left) Deer in forest (right)
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    Hair salons in Europe are dumping their clippings into forests and it’s miraculous

    Deers don’t like it but trees absolutely love it.

    Heather Wake

    Every day, hair salons sweep countless hair clippings off their floors and toss them into the trash without much thought. But in parts of France, Belgium, and Luxembourg, those discarded strands are finding an entirely different purpose: helping forests grow.

    French recycling company Capillum has developed a surprisingly effective way to reuse human hair by turning it into biodegradable mulch that protects young trees from hungry deer. The company collects hair from participating salons and transforms it into flattened fiber sheets that can be wrapped around vulnerable saplings.

    What sounds unusual at first actually solves several environmental problems at once.

    A second life for salon clippings

    Hair salons generate an enormous amount of waste each year. Most clippings are simply thrown away, even though human hair is remarkably durable because it is made largely from keratin, a fibrous protein that breaks down slowly over time.

    Capillum saw potential in a material most people never think twice about. The company accepts hair regardless of texture, length, color, or whether it has been dyed. Once gathered, the hair is fed into a machine that minces everything together into dense fiber sheets that can be laid around the base of trees. The process transforms something typically viewed as garbage into a practical tool for conservation efforts.

    Why young trees need protection

    hair salon, forests, recycling
    A tree sapling, Canva

    Many forests depend on saplings surviving long enough to mature and replenish the ecosystem. However, young trees often struggle in areas with large deer populations. Deer are known to chew on bark, especially during seasons when food is scarce. Because saplings have thin bark and delicate trunks, even small amounts of damage can stunt their growth or kill them entirely.

    Foresters have historically relied on plastic fencing and tree guards to keep deer away. While those barriers can work well, they also create waste and require maintenance over time.

    Capillum’s recycled hair mats offer another approach. The scent of human hair naturally discourages deer from getting too close to the trees, steering them toward other vegetation instead. The method protects saplings without harming wildlife.

    A biodegradable alternative to plastic

    Unlike plastic guards, the hair fibers gradually decompose and return nutrients to the soil. As the keratin breaks down, it releases nitrogen and amino acids that can support plant growth. That nutrient-rich quality is one reason some gardeners have long experimented with placing hair into compost piles or using it directly in garden beds. Knowing this, Capillum sells its eco-friendly hair mulch to home gardeners interested in more sustainable growing methods. 

    Human hair is more useful than most people realize

    hair salon, forests, recycling
    A small clump of hair, Canva

    This is far from the first time Capillum has found creative uses for human hair. The company previously mixed hair with wool to help absorb pollutants from water because both materials naturally attract oil. 

    Around the world, scientists and environmental groups have similarly explored using recycled hair for oil spill cleanup, agricultural mats, and composting projects. Some studies have even examined whether hair fibers could eventually help create insulation materials or textiles.

    All this to say: a routine haircut may not seem connected to forest conservation, yet thousands of discarded strands now helping protect young trees suggest otherwise. This is a brilliant example of humanity using creativity for good, and how making just one element of human life less wasteful can have a profound impact. 

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