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Mom shares a catchy song to use when you or your child is feeling worried

Whether we're 4 or 40, this little ditty is a good reminder of what we can and can't control.

mama nous/Instagram (used with permission)

"Worrying has never changed a thing."

Worrying is a very human habit, but one most of us wish we didn't do so much. The way our brains torture us about the future with worry, fear, and anxiety often starts very young, causing all sorts of woe as people grow up. Excessive worry can keep us from doing things that we enjoy and prevent us from taking reasonable risks. If we don't learn strategies for managing mental obstacles that get in our way, they can play far too big a role in our lives for far too long.

That's why a mantra/song called "worrying has never changed a thing" shared by a mother who goes by "mama nous" has captured so many people's minds and hearts. People are saying it's helping them personally as well as helping them help their kids who struggle with worry.

In a video on Instagram, mama nous shares that she's been singing the song to herself a lot lately, and that her 4-year-old had climbed up into her arm and requested it. "It's the kind of message that he might not need yet, but I hope it helps to plant seeds of resilience that he can draw on when he's ready," she wrote.

Watch:

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'This song has actually literally reprogrammed my brain," mama nous writes. "As an anxious person, it's not that I don't worry anymore: it's just that when my brain starts to play its favorite trick of rehashing every mistake I've made that day when I'm in bed trying to go to sleep, there's a new voice that speaks up almost immediately."

Being able to challenge anxious thoughts with more helpful thoughts is a huge step in managing anxiety, and using a song that's so easy to draw from is such a great idea.

"She reminds me to take a breath," mama nous continues. "Then she asks if there's anything I can do about it in this moment. Can I gather information? Can I prepare? Can I talk to anyone in a way that would be helpful? So far the answer has always been no. And then I let out a big exhale knowing that in this moment, all I can do is trust + wait until there is something I can do. And then I am able to let it go."

In a follow-up post, mama nous shared the lyrics to the song, which can also be found on Spotify.

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Check out how much people appreciate the helpful offering:

"This is such a wonderful mantra to have, and it absolutely has helped me this week! I love the video of you co-regulating with your child, too. Thank you so much!"

"My 3yo was captivated when I showed him the video of this song! He listened to it over and over!!! ❤️"

"My 6 year old has a message for this lady, " I like your song, it helps me go to sleep, and it helps me a lot to know how to not worry, thank you. X""

"As someone who struggles with anxiety and near-constant worry, this was very soothing and actually brought me to tears, and I will likely have it on repeat. 😭"

"I just wanted to let you know how much this song helped me and my son tonight. He was so disregulated and acting out hard.. eventually I played this a few times together, and it calmed him right down and he kissed me. Thank-you so much for your beautiful creations. We will sing it next time before we get to the points we did tonight."

"I started learning this for my students but on the third round, my voice wabbled so much, I realized it was more for my inner child. ❤️"

Fear is one of our strongest primal instincts, which makes worry and anxiety really tough to counter. It's not easy when it feels like your instinctual brain is working against your conscious brain, but tools like this song can be surprisingly powerful in helping your conscious thoughts override the more instinct-driven ones.

You can follow mama nous on Instagram for more musical tools and gentle parenting inspiration.

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Family

If you're a chronic worrier, here's what you should know about your brain.

Image created from Pixabay.

Everybody has a little worrying to do.

I worry a lot. I worry about my friends, my health, my planet. Heck, I worry about worrying too much.

It can keep me up at night wondering whether I've ruined my shoes by buying shoe polish, or it can make me read that one email 10 times before sending it off. It can be tempting to hate my brain for worrying so much.

Maybe I shouldn't be so harsh on myself. Every human being worries. And it turns out, worrying can have some surprising upsides, as professor Kate Sweeny recently wrote. So if you're the kind of person who worries about worrying, here are two big things to remember, courtesy of Sweeny:

1. Worrying is a track coach, keeping our brains active and motivated.

mental health, fear, anxiety, psychology

Always stretch your brain and your body.

Image via Pixabay.

Nobody would hate their brains for making them feel scared when there's a big, obvious danger. Like an angry tiger. Or a bear. Or an angry tiger riding a bear. In that case, we need an immediate motivator for an immediate problem.

But our brains need a subtler response to subtler problems. Worry and anxiety can help our brains recognize and focus on long-term problems or motivate us to make better choices, like wearing our seat belts or applying sunscreen to avoid skin cancer.

2. Worrying is an emotional cushion, making our highs higher and lows not as bad.

emotional intelligence, research, biology of fear, coping with stress

Sometimes multiple pillows just happen.

Image via Pixabay.

Though worrying itself is unpleasant, it can help balance out our other emotions. One study showed the BBC television sitcom "Fawlty Towers" got funnier after watching a tense horror movie.

On the flip side, if things end up going south, your brain has already prepared itself. So worrying can be an emotional win-win.

But like all things, there's a right amount.

While a little worry can help us stay motivated, too much can paralyze us and can be a sign of anxiety disorders. If that's what's going on, taking a break from Facebook, practicing meditation, exercising, and talking with a therapist can all help reduce anxiety.

So, biologically, don't hate your brain for worrying.

Worry can be stressful. It's not fun to stay awake thinking about what you're going to say to your boss on Monday, whether you're eating right, or whether you're being a good friend. You might find yourself beset by worries at the worst time.

And that's OK. We can't always control our brains, but we worrywarts don't always need to feel bad for worrying. Sometimes it's our brain just helping us out.

Family

Anxiety affects everyone differently. These comics offer some great coping tips.

Comic artist Sara Zimmerman drew her daily struggles with a little 'shoulder monster' called anxiety.

Anxiety is pretty common in adults.

It's so common, in fact, that it affects about 18% of us — 40 million adults ages 18 to 54 — in the U.S. every year.

Though anxiety looks different on everyone, it is typically a normal reaction to stress.However, for some people, anxiety can become excessive, and it can have debilitating effects. Post-traumatic stress disorders and obsessive-compulsive disorders are just a few of the most common types of anxiety disorders that millions of Americans experience during their adult life.

To explain what anxiety really feels like for some people, comic artist Sara Zimmerman, from Unearthed Comics, drew some of her daily struggles with the little "shoulder monster."

Here are a few:

1. Sleeping in is usually something to look forward to. But anxiety can make that a little more difficult.

Comics via Sara Zimmerman, Unearthed Comics. All images used with permission.

2. Having anxiety means sometimes having to relive parts of childhood we'd rather forget.

3. There are some other side effects of anxiety that you probably don't want around.

4. Staying motivated can be challenging because anxiety has a tendency to try to block hopes and dreams.

5. The fear of being alone can be overwhelming.

6. But sometimes, even the slightest distraction can deflect the worst of anxiety.

7. If the distraction is big enough, you may even find room to continue going after those hopes and dreams — sans anxiety and fear tag-alongs.

8. However, with the right tools, it's possible to find a way to live well with anxiety.

Anxiety can be really difficult to deal with — that's not up for debate.

But using strategies like finding an experienced therapist, eating healthy meals, getting adequate sleep, and exercising are all helpful in learning to live well despite those pesky anxiety bugs. You can do it!