upworthy
Add Upworthy to your Google News feed.
Google News Button
Democracy

I did a roundtable with the Vice President about abortion. Here are 4 things that surprised me.

The conversation was important, but in some ways the experience was nothing like I expected it to be.

Annie Reneau, Joy Reid, Kamala Harris
TheReidOut/Twitter

Upworthy associate editor Annie Reneau chatting with Joy Reid and Kamala Harris in an MSNBC roundtable

It's been a very weird week.

I'm a writer and editor—not a medical professional, legal expert or political activist in any way—so imagine my surprise when I got a message from Vice President Kamala Harris's senior advisor inviting me to join a roundtable discussion on MSNBC for the one-year anniversary of the Dobbs decision that overturned Roe v. Wade. I thought someone might be pranking me, but nope. The invite was real.

Apparently, someone had read an op-ed I'd written years ago about how it's possible to be morally pro-life but politically pro-choice and felt that my voice would add something to the discussion. The panelists included the lead plaintiffs in the Dobbs vs. Jackson Women's Health Organization and the Texas Abortion Ban lawsuits, two activists involved in the fight for reproductive rights, a Texas OB-GYN who has seen the implications of the Dobbs decision in his own practice…and me.

I felt remarkably average among these experts on the issue, but I think that was the point. My view represents millions of average American voters who may feel conflicted about where they stand on abortion morally and legally and are trying to reconcile their personal or religious beliefs with what they think our laws should be. Additionally, as someone with no political affiliation or loyalty to any party, I could speak about grappling with this issue without any partisan pressure or influence.

I'd like to point out that I'm wary of most politicians and well aware of biases in the media, so despite feeling honored to be asked, I was a bit hesitant to participate. I certainly didn't want to contribute to the partisan divide if I could help it. But because abortion is such a complex and nuanced issue, dedicating an entire hour of prime time to a discussion about it sounded like a good way to help people gain a better, broader understanding. So less than 24 hours after being asked, I was on a plane to Dallas to join the roundtable, which filmed the next day.

The full roundtable discussion is worth watching (and can be found on Peacock, with clips available on MSNBC), but I wanted to pull back the curtain and offer a peek behind the scenes because there were some things about the experience that genuinely surprised me.

1. I had no idea ahead of time what questions they were going to ask

I assumed participants in these kinds of events would be prepped ahead of time with what questions they would be asking and have ample time to prepare. This was not the case for me, and according to the fellow panelists I chatted with, it wasn't for them, either. I used my travel time to prepare a few talking points I felt I could address somewhat intelligently based on my op-ed (since that's what prompted the invite), but all I knew before arriving for the taping was that we were going to be discussing the Dobbs decision.

The only preparation we got was about 30 seconds before each segment was filmed. Joy Reid briefly explained how that segment would be structured with something like, "Okay, in this segment, we're going to talk about [some element of the abortion issue]. I'm going to ask [panelist] about [XYZ] and then pivot to [panelist] to talk about [XYZ]. But feel free to chime in if you want to respond to something. We really want this to be a conversation."

That was it. The entire prep. I was surprised—but also delighted—by how unscripted it was. No one asked me to make any specific points. I didn't feel any expectation or pressure to even agree with what was being said. Obviously, they knew where I stood based on what I'd written, but they had no idea what I was actually going to say ahead of time.

2. The conversations on-screen were no different than the ones being had off-screen by all parties involved

I think people who are skeptical of media may think that things said for the camera aren't as genuine as one would hope. Maybe that's the case sometimes, but that wasn't my experience at all here. In the green room and during the commercial breaks while filming, the conversation about the issue continued just as it did on screen, just without a host guiding it. The genuine sincerity of the discussion filled me with hope.

For instance, the OB-GYN panelist I was chatting with in the green room told me that in his 30 years of practice, he'd never had a patient come to the decision to terminate a pregnancy lightly, and we talked about the importance of keeping compassion and empathy central to the conversation about abortion. That was just our casual conversation. In the hours I was there, I overheard people from the crew to the other panelists to Joy Reid and the VP talking behind the scenes about all the things we talked about on screen. There was nothing contrived or fake about what you see in the roundtable discussion.

3. There was no atmosphere of eliteness

Despite the presence of Secret Service agents everywhere and despite being a high-profile cable news show involving the Vice President, the whole thing after going through the metal detectors felt mostly…normal.

All the people I interacted with, from the folks arranging my travel to the people headlining the show, were so down-to-earth. Everyone was genuinely nice and repeatedly expressed their gratitude to all of us for being there. I kept thinking, "Wait, aren't I the one who's supposed to feel grateful for this opportunity?" I didn't expect to feel so at ease. There was an air of professionalism, of course, but not at all a stuffy or high-pressured one.

I mean, I chatted with Joy Reid about her hot flashes while we were waiting for Kamala Harris to arrive, for goodness sake. It was obviously a serious and highly organized event with lots of moving parts, but it also felt casual and relaxed, which made it easy not to feel too nervous.

4. I came home to an immediate example of why this issue is so important

The night after I came home from Dallas, I had friends over for dinner. One of them works with pregnant women and told me about a mom who was in her second trimester and very ill. Her bloodwork looked horrible and her health was going downhill fast. It turned out she had a very rare fetal anomaly that was creating her health problem, and she needed to terminate the pregnancy or risk a dire outcome. The anomaly meant there ultimately wasn't going to be a way to save the fetus.

Her previous OB-GYN who had delivered her other children was in Idaho, and though he wanted to help her, he couldn't, because what she needed was an abortion. She wasn't at death's door yet (though technically could crash at any time), so despite the obvious need to end the pregnancy, his hands were tied by Idaho abortion laws. She then had to jump through a bunch of hoops to get to a provider in Washington who could help her, all while her health continued to be in danger.

There are countless stories like this that illustrate the very real implications of the Dobbs decision on real people, including people who don't actually want an abortion but need one. There's a tendency to try to make this issue black-and-white, but it's not. There are unique circumstances surrounding every pregnancy and every childbirth, and real women are harmed when lawmakers insert themselves into healthcare decisions with no medical expertise or training.

It's vital that we keep the moral debates separate from the legal debates on this issue. Pregnancy is a healthcare issue, deserving of medical privacy. No lawmaker needs to be in the room when a woman and a doctor are making decisions about her healthcare. People can debate the morality of those decisions all day long, but keep the law out of it.

I wasn't necessarily surprised, but I was happy to see first-hand how, at the highest levels of this unfortunately politically-charged issue, the concern behind the debate isn't about politics, but about the real people negatively impacted by the court's decision.


From Your Site Articles
reproductive rights
DemocracyPolitics
Badge
Levi Strauss Foundation
The Levi Strauss Foundation advances the human rights and well-being of underserved people in places where the company has a business presence
Modern Families

Once a refugee seeking safety in the U.S., Anita Omary is using what she learned to help others thrive.

Even in divided times, small acts of friendship help create vibrant communities where everyone feels safe.

Once a refugee seeking safety in the U.S., Anita Omary is using what she learned to help others thrive.
Pictured here: Anita Omary; her son, Osman; and Omary’s close friends
Pictured here: Anita Omary; her son, Osman; and Omary’s close friends
True

In March 2023, after months of preparation and paperwork, Anita Omary arrived in the United States from her native Afghanistan to build a better life. Once she arrived in Connecticut, however, the experience was anything but easy.

“When I first arrived, everything felt so strange—the weather, the environment, the people,” Omary recalled. Omary had not only left behind her extended family and friends in Afghanistan, she left her career managing child protective cases and supporting refugee communities behind as well. Even more challenging, Anita was five months pregnant at the time, and because her husband was unable to obtain a travel visa, she found herself having to navigate a new language, a different culture, and an unfamiliar country entirely on her own.

“I went through a period of deep disappointment and depression, where I wasn’t able to do much for myself,” Omary said.

Then something incredible happened: Omary met a woman who would become her close friend, offering support that would change her experience as a refugee—and ultimately the trajectory of her entire life.

Understanding the journey

Like Anita Omary, tens of thousands of people come to the United States each year seeking safety from war, political violence, religious persecution, and other threats. Yet escaping danger, unfortunately, is only the first challenge. Once here, immigrant and refugee families must deal with the loss of displacement, while at the same time facing language barriers, adapting to a new culture, and sometimes even facing social stigma and anti-immigrant biases.

Welcoming immigrant and refugee neighbors strengthens the nation and benefits everyone—and according to Anita Omary, small, simple acts of human kindness can make the greatest difference in helping them feel safe, valued, and truly at home.

A warm welcome

Dee and Omary's son, Osman

Anita Omary was receiving prenatal checkups at a woman’s health center in West Haven when she met Dee, a nurse.

“She immediately recognized that I was new, and that I was struggling,” Omary said. “From that moment on, she became my support system.”

Dee started checking in on Omary throughout her pregnancy, both inside the clinic and out.

“She would call me and ask am I okay, am I eating, am I healthy,” Omary said. “She helped me with things I didn’t even realize I needed, like getting an air conditioner for my small, hot room.”

Soon, Dee was helping Omary apply for jobs and taking her on driving lessons every weekend. With her help, Omary landed a job, passed her road test on the first attempt, and even enrolled at the University of New Haven to pursue her master’s degree. Dee and Omary became like family. After Omary’s son, Osman, was born, Dee spent five days in the hospital at her side, bringing her halal food and brushing her hair in the same way Omary’s mother used to. When Omary’s postpartum pain became too great for her to lift Osman’s car seat, Dee accompanied her to his doctor’s appointments and carried the baby for her.

“Her support truly changed my life,” Omary said. “Her motivation, compassion, and support gave me hope. It gave me a sense of stability and confidence. I didn’t feel alone, because of her.”

More than that, the experience gave Omary a new resolve to help other people.

“That experience has deeply shaped the way I give back,” she said. “I want to be that source of encouragement and support for others that my friend was for me.”

Extending the welcome

Omary and Dee at the Martin Luther King, Jr. Vision Awards ceremony at the University of New Haven.

Omary is now flourishing. She currently works as a career development specialist as she continues her Master’s degree. She also, as a member of the Refugee Storytellers Collective, helps advocate for refugee and immigrant families by connecting them with resources—and teaches local communities how to best welcome newcomers.

“Welcoming new families today has many challenges,” Omary said. “One major barrier is access to English classes. Many newcomers, especially those who have just arrived, often put their names on long wait lists and for months there are no available spots.” For women with children, the lack of available childcare makes attending English classes, or working outside the home, especially difficult.

Omary stresses that sometimes small, everyday acts of kindness can make the biggest difference to immigrant and refugee families.

“Welcome is not about big gestures, but about small, consistent acts of care that remind you that you belong,” Omary said. Receiving a compliment on her dress or her son from a stranger in the grocery store was incredibly uplifting during her early days as a newcomer, and Omary remembers how even the smallest gestures of kindness gave her hope that she could thrive and build a new life here.

“I built my new life, but I didn’t do it alone,” Omary said. “Community and kindness were my greatest strengths.”

Are you in? Click here to join the Refugee Advocacy Lab and sign the #WeWillWelcome pledge and complete one small act of welcome in your community. Together, with small, meaningful steps, we can build communities where everyone feels safe.

This article is part of Upworthy’s “The Threads Between U.S.” series that highlights what we have in common thanks to the generous support from the Levi Strauss Foundation, whose grantmaking is committed to creating a culture of belonging.

Modern FamiliesMotherhoodFamilySponsored
Education

How to keep your mouth shut in conversations when you know you should really stay quiet

Most people never regret just staying silent.

quiet, finger over lips, don't talk, keep it to yourself, silence
via Canva/Photos

A woman with her finger over her mouth.

It can be hard to stay quiet when you feel like you just have to speak your mind. But sometimes it's not a great idea to share your opinions on current events with your dad or tell your boss where they're wrong in a meeting. And having a bit of self-control during a fight with your spouse is a good way to avoid apologizing the next morning.

Further, when we fight the urge to talk when it's not necessary, we become better listeners and give others a moment in the spotlight to share their views. Building that small mental muscle to respond to events rather than react can make all the difference in social situations.

argument, coworkers, angry coworkers, hostile work enviornment, disagreement A woman is getting angry at her coworker.via Canva/Photos

What is the WAIT method?

One way people have honed the skill of holding back when they feel the burning urge to speak up is the WAIT method, an acronym for the question you should ask yourself in that moment: "Why Am I Talking?" Pausing to consider the question before you open your mouth can shift your focus from "being heard" to "adding value" to any conversation.

The Center for The Empowerment Dynamic has some questions we should consider after taking a WAIT moment:

  • What is my intention behind what I am about to say?
  • What question can I ask to better understand what the other person is saying?
  • Is my need to talk an attempt to divert the attention to me?
  • How might I become comfortable with silence rather than succumb to my urge to talk?

tape over muth, sielnce, be quiet, mouth shut, saying nothing A man with tape over his mouth.via Canva/Photos

The WAIT method is a good way to avoid talking too much. In work meetings, people who overtalk risk losing everyone's attention and diluting their point to the extent that others aren't quite sure what they were trying to say. Even worse, they can come across as attention hogs or know-it-alls. Often, the people who get to the heart of the matter succinctly are the ones who are noticed and respected.

Just because you're commanding the attention of the room doesn't mean you're doing yourself any favors or helping other people in the conversation.

The WAIT method is also a great way to give yourself a breather and let things sit for a moment during a heated, emotional discussion. It gives you a chance to cool down and rethink your goals for the conversation. It can also help you avoid saying something you regret.

fight, spuse disagreement, communications skills, upset husband, argument A husband is angry with his wife. via Canva/Photos

How much should I talk in a meeting?

So if it's a work situation, like a team meeting, you don't want to be completely silent. How often should you speak up?

Cary Pfeffer, a speaking coach and media trainer, shared an example of the appropriate amount of time to talk in a meeting with six people:

"I would suggest a good measure would be three contributions over an hour-long meeting from each non-leader participant. If anyone is talking five/six/seven times you are over-participating! Allow someone else to weigh in, even if that means an occasional awkward silence. Anything less seems like your voice is just not being represented, and anything over three contributions is too much."

Ultimately, the WAIT method is about taking a second to make sure you're not just talking to hear yourself speak. It helps ensure that you have a clear goal for participating in the conversation and that you're adding value for others. Knowing when and why to say something is the best way to make a positive contribution and avoid shooting yourself in the foot.

From Your Site Articles
communications tips
EducationLearning
Joy

Man hires Austin Powers impersonator 'just for himself' and it's delightfully awkward

"You must live alone!"

Mike Myers, Austin Powers, impersonator, Richard Halpern, 90s movies
Photo Credit: Chase Hofer, Instagram

An Austin Powers impersonator shows up in Chase Hofer's apartment.

It was groovy, baby. Chase Hofer woke up one day and decided to hire an Austin Powers impersonator to just, well, come over. And that he did, creating a brilliantly funny and equally awkward exchange between two guys just hanging in an apartment. (Albeit one of them was dressed head to toe as the infamous English ladies' man.)

For those unfamiliar with the Austin Powers franchise, comedian Mike Myers created and played the character in a series of three films directed by Jay Roach. The gist was that Powers is a British international spy who loved crushed velvet suits and "shagging" and wasn't ashamed of either. The purposely cringe-heavy dialogue created hours of fun, and the '60s spy satire was blatant.

In the clip, Hofer opens the door to find "Austin Powers" (as played by actual impersonator Richard Halpern) dressed in his trademark blue velour suit, frilly white shirt, and thick black glasses. They shake hands, and Halpern immediately says, "You must be Chase, baby! What a grip you have. You must live alone!" They laugh uproariously.

Halpern asks, "So what do you want me to do? Like what I would do at a party?" He then begins laughing maniacally, pacing and yelling out some of his catchphrases—most notably, "Oh, BEHAVE." After turning to his smartphone, he remembers a line that would only work if looking at a woman's chest area: "Oh, you make a lovely couple." This lands awkwardly, as he tries to explain that it's a "boobie" reference. Hofer assures him he got it, though it's a "different time."

@chase_hofer

Yeah baby yeah

From there, the awkwardness just gets better. Halpern is now lounging on the couch. Hofer asks, "Did you watch the Super Bowl?" He answers, "Oh yeah, yeah sure I did." Hofer follows this up with, "Are you more of a soccer guy since… U.K.?" He yells, "Soccer, I don't even know her!" Hofer attempts to feign a laugh, but it putters out pretty quickly.

The room is incredibly quiet for a bit, followed by a little more forced banter. The clip ends with the two of them watching a rap performance on TV in complete silence.

The comments on both Hofer's TikTok and Instagram page are also truly observant and funny. One points out the commitment to the bit: "Dude has the car and everything."

Austin Powers, Mike Myers, impersonator, viral video, Union Jack flag Austin Powers impersonator arrives at Chase Hofer's apartment.Photo Credit: Kenneth Webb, TikTok

Another jokes, "When the Austin Powers impersonator thinks YOU'RE the weirdo."

On Instagram, a person references the rap performance they're watching, noting, "The 2016 XXL freshman cypher at the end is pure gold. PURE GOLD."

Upworthy had a chance to chat with Hofer, who shares how the idea sparked. "I came up with the idea after doing it with a magician! The magician was a friend of mine. So I thought it would be great to do it with this Austin Powers impersonator that my friends have worked with."

Said aforementioned impersonator has been playing Austin Powers for ages. "Austin was played by this man on Instagram known as 'Austin Powers Impersonator.' He's been doing this professionally for more than 25 years."

(Note: On Richard Halpern's Instagram page, he lets it be known that he's L.A.-based and "ready for YOUR event.")

We asked if Halpern had been given a heads up. "Basically, I gave him the rundown that it'd just be us two, and then I rolled non-stop for 30 minutes. So it was basically all improv."

As for Myers himself, Hofer is a fan. "I have not met Mike Myers! Big fan though. I felt like I was watching him a couple of days ago!"

As popular as this clip has become, some wonder if this cringe humor would be too much for younger generations. On the Reddit thread, "Does Generation Z enjoy the Austin Powers movies or find them offensive and outdated?" the OP writes, "I recently watched Austin Powers with my nephew. He found half of it funny, but the other half he didn't really get. Some jokes he thought were racist and not funny. This made me wonder, Gen Z, do you like these movies, or do you find them offensive and outdated?"

The OP adds, "Personally, I found these movies really funny. I love that Mike Myers has the laugh-per-minute dialed up in these movies. There's constant jokes… nonstop jokes. Definitely some of the jokes lost their luster from when I was 19 years old. But the jokes are still there."

A scene from Goldmember, part of the Austin Powers series. www.youtube.com, Nizzinny, Newline Cinema

This thread received nearly 3,000 comments. One Redditor wasn't bothered at all, noting that being offensive is the POINT. "That seems funny to me because Austin Powers is a direct parody of the old Bond movies, so the overt sexual and offensive jokes are part of the satire."

Another points out that it's all relative, writing, "The weird thing is that despite Austin being a complete and total horndog, he's also weirdly more respectful than a lot of characters at the time or since. There's a scene in one of the movies (I can't remember which one) where the female co-lead is finally willing to sleep with him after he's been unsuccessfully hitting on her most of the movie, and he respectfully turns her down because she's drunk as a skunk and he has the decency to not take advantage of someone who's inebriated and thus can't consent."

Perhaps Dr. Evil (also played by Myers in the Austin Powers films) said it best when he pointed out in Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery: "I've been frozen for thirty years, okay?"

From Your Site Articles
austin powers
JoyHumor
Internet

Girl stops 80s game show host in his tracks after uncomfortable interactions with other kids

No is a complete sentence.

80s game show; just like mom; Fergie Olver; 80s childhood; family game show; body autonomy
YouTube Screenshot

Girl stops 80s game show host in his tracks as he tries to kiss her

The 80s seems like a completely different lifetime when it comes to what was considered acceptable behavior. Things people deemed acceptable or were just part of everyday expectations for television back in the 60s through well into the 90s would get stars blacklisted today. But there was one game show in the 80s that had moments so cringy that even for the times may have raised some eyebrows though everyone seemed to go along with it, except one brave little girl.

The Canadian show, Just Like Mom ran from 1980-1985 even with the uncomfortable moments between the game show host and young girls. The girls who were aged 7-12 would appear on the show with their mother answering questions about each other and competing in bake-offs to see which pair knew each other best. Just Like Mom was created by Catherine Swing, the wife of the show's host Fergie Olver who would often stand uncomfortably close to the girls and elicit kisses.

80s game show; just like mom; Fergie Olver; 80s childhood; family game show; body autonomy Mom hugging crying daughterPhoto credit: Canva

Recently a compilation video of the game show host behaving in a manner people might consider questionable is going viral. In the video the Olver stands near the girls, often putting his hand on their backs, placing his face close to theirs to ask questions. The very first clip shows 11-year-old Lee Ann, Olver hovers over her asking what color her eyes are.

"What color are your eyes?" Olver asks before the child tells him they're blue, to which he responds, "they're not blue, now don't tell me that. Look at me a little closer." Just as the girl leans in slightly, appearing hesitant to do so, Olver quickly kisses the child on the side of her mouth and declares, "they're green."

80s game show; just like mom; Fergie Olver; 80s childhood; family game show; body autonomy Dad kissing child on cheekPhoto credit: Canva

The audience sounds as if they didn't know how to react to the bizarre moment. Some people loudly gasp, others uncomfortably chuckle, while a few seem to let out a high pitched surprised squeal. The girl also laughs uneasily while the host remains extremely close. Video clip after video clip shows similar interactions where the host tries to either kiss the girls or have them kiss him but one little girl refused. While it appeared that she was nervous to do so in front of a live audience, on television and refusing a directive from an adult, she stood her ground.

This was a moment where parents can see in real time the benefit of teaching body autonomy and the power of teaching children that no is a complete sentence. Olver originally didn't accept the young girl's "no," attempting to coerce her into kissing him when she was clearly uncomfortable and uninterested in the request.

The host perches himself up close to the young girl and says, "you look like a girl who likes to give out hugs and kisses," to which the girl laughs with discomfort before saying, "not really." That didn't stop him, Olver continued, "not really? can I have a hug and a kiss?" This time the girl gives a very direct answer through nerves by shaking her head no while saying "uh-uh." She's clearly uncomfortable as she bites her fingernail trying to assert authority over her body against someone much older.

At this point the child has been clear. She immediately told the host she didn't give out hugs and kisses and when that didn't work she mustered the courage to say no more directly. Olver was still not accepting of the child's boundaries and continued to apply pressure by questioning her decision, "I can't have one?" Again the child shakes her head and says no but he persists, saying "even if I say...whisper in your ear that Alison you're going to win the show? I still can't have a hug and a kiss?" Alison sticks to her answer so Olver changes tactics, telling the child, "Well I guess you can't win the show then if I don't get a hug and a kiss."

80s game show; just like mom; Fergie Olver; 80s childhood; family game show; body autonomy Mom comforting daughterPhoto credit: Canva

Alison stayed firm in her no but the host's behavior resulted in the child's mother calling him a dirty old man. In the end the host appears to have moved on and told the girl she did a good job answering one of the questions, but to top the praise Olver attempts to sneak a kiss. The little girl didn't let that deter her as she quickly dodged his advance.

It seems apparent that Alison's parents instilled the idea of bodily autonomy in her giving her full permission to say no to adults and anyone else who dares to get in her space without consent. While the experience was probably not one that she would've ever wanted to have, that moment likely gave permission to other young girls watching to tell the host and other like him no. And no is a complete sentence, especially when it comes to someone's body. There's no further explanation needed. No further clarification. The answer is simply no. Well done Alison. Well done.

This article originally appeared in May.

From Your Site Articles
just like mom
InternetPop Culture
Culture

28 things people around the world thought movies made up about America but are totally real

"Red Solo Cups."

americans, america, american culture, american movies, american in movies, is america like the movies
Photo credit: Canva

Older couple sit in their home dressed in denim, holding red SOLO cups, surrounded by mini American flags.

Movies are all about magic. They tell stories that amplify and elaborate on the mundane bits of everyday life—leaving viewers questioning if things they see on the big screen are really real, or just portrayed that way.

For non-Americans enjoying American films, the movies can give them some pretty whacky ideas about what American culture is really like. But sometimes, how America is portrayed in the movies is actually spot-on.

People on Reddit discussed the things they've seen in American movies that actually are legitimate. From diners to the 'burbs to Greek life and more, these are 28 things that really exist in America—and not just the movies.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

People

"Cowboys. I mean I knew they were real and that some people dressed like the Hollywood version of cowboys but I did not realize it was still a present day job and that people still dress that way to do it." - Cougarette99

"Firefighters coming to help bring down a cat from a tree. I was visiting relatives one summer and one of the house cats climbed a tree and wouldn't come down. I came up with the idea of calling the fire department, thinking they'd laugh me off and hang up, but sure enough, they came with a truck, ladders, gear, everything, and helped bring the cat down successfully." - mrcmnt

"Baggers in the grocery store. And door greeters in completely normal supermarkets." - interesseret

"'More coffee, hon?' On a visit to the US, driving through Nevada or Utah we stopped at a diner and as we were entering I joked around saying something like 'if the waitress is wearing an apron and calls me honey I'll lose my sh*t'. Was. Not. Disappointed." - Jaimebgdb, Urik88

Places

"The way suburbia looks. I'm American and sent a picture of the street my home is on to a German friend and he was like 'it looks like a movie set'." - NewAnything8221

"Waiting all day in the DMV. Even when I had to do car stuff in the person, I was never anywhere for an entire day sorting it out." - ocelotrevs

"Going into a bar for a drink, and sitting at the bar, by yourself. Chatting to the bartender. Chatting to the random person next to you. I always thought that was something put in TV shows just so they could make up a reason for someone to chat to the bartender, or pour out their woes, or whatever. People don't sit by themselves at the bar anywhere else. I tried it in Australia and got weird looks." - the_rain_keeps_comin

"Diners and breakfast tradition? Don't know if I should call it like that but I would see in movies how diners would be a tradition to go at breakfast and it's really like that, those diners are busy!!" - ainacct

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Things

"The over-the-top Halloween parties where everyone took a large amount of effort to dress up. Yep that is accurate." - dion_o

"The length of a CVS receipt." - OptimistPrime527

"The insane medical advertisements with a million side effects said in rapid fire at the end. We visited my husband bestie in 2019, when we were watching something on tv while eating dinner we saw our first one. Genuinely turned to him like ‘that’s satire, right?’" - Myhandsarecold11

"Red Solo Cups. I thought they were just a Hollywood prop used to hide alcohol brands or signify 'party scene.' I went to a college party in Ohio and they were literally everywhere. I was shook." - Unlikely_Praline9442

Schools

"The fraternity/sorority scene in college. I was an international student at UT Austin and it was a crazy realization that the movie depictions of college life is actually underwhelming. I witnessed shit that could not be legally portrayed in movies. You people are crazy." - lucas14qr

"The yellow school buses that have a flip out stop sign." - MudMonyet22

"Prom culture. The king/queen stuff." - kyubeyt

"lol I’m American from the CA coast and while we had high school football, I thought that it being a huge deal was only in movies/tv. Then I moved to Georgia and later Texas. Hahaha omg. Wow. I was wrong lol." - TakeMeBackToCA831

@iamsoldana

The school system in the USA really is like the movies🏈📚🎓🎥🎬🍿 #usa #america #highschool #americaninparis #americanhighschool #americancollege #americanculture

Food

"I am an American who lived overseas for many years, and had many friends on social media when I returned home. I posted a photo of Chinese food takeout in those white square boxes and had dozens of my friends from overseas react in surprise- they thought it was only something they did in movies." - Kateseesu

"'Have a nice day' everywhere all the time and blueberry muffins." - AlfredLuan

"The free refill at restaurants." - craftlover221b

New York City

"All the smoke/steam coming out the vents on the road in New York in the movies." - curious__curiosity

"I got off a bus in New York and a newspaper blew past me. I could imagine the camera panning up from my shoes..." - JunkoKumaki

"I got off a bus in New York and a dude came up to me, opened his jacket, and tried to sell me one of many 'Rolexes' he had hanging inside his coat. I legit thought that was strictly a movie thing, and I'm American!" - Ataru13

"And constant police/ambulance sounds. I thought it's bullshit until I came to live here. Now my daughters say the street noise is calming :)." - romario77

"Manhattan. I remember my first trip and was like 'Oh my God this is all fucking real'." - fenton7

Nature

"Fireflies are pretty wild, you sure do just have swarms of glowing bugs." - WehingSounds

"Tumbleweeds. I was actually flabbergasted when I went to visit the US and people were casually talking about tumbleweeds. I thought they were just a thing in cartoons." - PlanetoidVesta

"I'm an American, an Alabamian. I made friends with a guy at work who is Russian. He was new to the country, so we'd invite him to come over and eat with us all the time. One summer afternoon, we were sitting on our back deck drinking beer and a hummingbird whizzed past his ear. Alex totally freaked out. I had to point out our hummingbird feeder to him. He sat there the entire day just mesmerized by the things. They really are magical when you stop to think about them." - AnybodySeeMyKeys

"Skunks! I genuinely thought they were a mythical creature of cartoon origins. Why? I don’t know. I guess I thought they were implausible, like unicorns. They don’t exist in Europe, so I only knew of them from cartoons, and from sitcom jokes. I made assumptions about their existence that went unchallenged until I was 27." - difractional

From Your Site Articles
american movies
CultureJoy
Health

Experts explain why the 'Infinity Tracing Technique' can be a game changer for people with insomnia

The simple technique can help with basic relaxation, too.

sleep, sleep hacks, Infinity Tracing Technique, EMDR, insomnia
Photo credit: Canva

Left: A woman who can't sleep. Right: An infinity symbol.

It's 2:00 a.m., and you simply can't get your mind to shut down. You've tried counting sheep, but they just keep crash-landing into meadows, making the insomnia even worse. Maybe you've tried every trick in the book, from over-the-counter sleep aids to lavender-scented pillows. Well, there's one more trick to try, and some people swear by it.

It's called the "Infinity Tracing Technique," and it's actually quite simple. Simply put your finger in the air and imagine tracing the infinity symbol (the number eight sideways) for a couple of minutes. This easy technique can instantly help calm an overactive mind.

@drjoe_md

Is the infinity tracing technique the hack you need for an overthinking brain? #overthinking #anxiety #insomnia #mentalhealth

Dr. Joe Whittington explains the idea in layman's terms in a TikTok video. "You ever lay in bed at night overthinking all the embarrassing things you've done since childhood?" he asks. "Same. So I'm gonna teach you a technique that might help you calm your overactive brain."

He breaks down exactly how to do it:

"What you do is you take your finger, put it in the air, and you trace the infinity symbol slowly and methodically. Not like you're casting spells. And as you're tracing this infinity symbol, you're gonna just follow it with your eyes. Only your eyes. What this does is it activates your vestibular center, which is involved with your balance and eye movements. When your vestibular system gets activated, it can help calm racing thoughts. Sort of like distracting a toddler with a shiny object, except for the toddler is your overactive brain."

It's helpful to the brain in other ways, too. "It's a technique often used in therapy and neuroscience to help you stop doomscrolling your regrets," he adds.

relaxation techniques, sleep, sleep hacks, Infinity Tracing technique, figure eight A blue light painting of an infinity symbol. Photo by Sandip Kalal on Unsplash

Whittington is likely referring to a therapy technique called EMDR, which uses similar methods involving eye movement. EMDR stands for Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing, and it's used to help people process complex trauma.

The EMDR Institute explains how it works:

"During EMDR therapy, the client attends to emotionally disturbing material in brief sequential doses while simultaneously focusing on an external stimulus. Therapist-directed lateral eye movements are the most commonly used external stimulus, but a variety of other stimuli, including hand-tapping and audio stimulation, are often used."

Similarly, the Infinity Tracing Technique pairs eye movements with specific brain activity to help calm the mind and redirect focus. This technique has recently become popular due to therapists and influencers sharing it online.

Sarah Jackson offers additional insight in her Instagram Reel, where she demonstrates the process using a capped blue marker to "write" in the air. She explains that "Figure-8 tracking," as she calls it, activates not only the vestibular system but also the ocular system.

"Eye muscles connect directly to the brainstem — the part of the brain that governs survival functions," she writes. "Tracking a moving object sends rhythmic signals, saying: I'm balanced, I'm oriented, I'm safe."

Jackson further explains:

"The vestibular system regulates balance and spatial orientation. Its connection to the brainstem helps calm the nervous system. Smooth, predictable movement supports groundedness, signaling safety. Cross-lateral movement integrates both hemispheres, aiding emotional processing and shifting focus from internal preoccupation to external grounding."

Many followers of both social media accounts say they've benefited from the technique. One TikToker jokes, "So I don't need to try to remember my junior high school locker combo?"

On the Instagram Reel, one commenter notes that the technique works: "This is great and so effective! I'm always looking for quick wins like this on those days where you can't tell where the time goes."

From Your Site Articles
sleep
HealthWellness
Trending Stories