Wife exposes the big double standard that exists between dad and mom hobbies
Is she the first person to realize this was happening?

Paige points out the difference between male and female hobbies.
Paige, a work-from-home mom of 4, recently exposed a double standard between husbands and wives that exists in many heterosexual family structures. According to Paige, men can enjoy hobbies that take them out of the home for long periods of time whereas women are forced to choose hobbies that work around their family’s schedule.
The video has received over 730,000 views on TikTok and earned over 1700 comments.
“Male hobbies typically take them outside of the home during the daytime during caretaking hours. Female hobbies often revolve around the schedules of their partner and their children and account for the domestic labor that they are handling and any kind of mental load that they carry,” she begins.
The mom notes that men’s hobbies include hunting, golf and training for marathons that take them away from the home and family for long hours. However, women’s hobbies, such as gardening, book clubs, painting, or yoga, can all be done while working around the family’s schedule at home or nearby.
@sheisapaigeturner Traditional male hobbies tend to take them away from the home and caretaking. This is made possible by the unpaid labor of women. women’s hobbies typically are scheduled around the needs of the family and take place outside of traditional caretaking hours. When women marry men, they lose time to unpaid labor, but when men marry women, they gain time. This plays into their ability to participate in hobbies. #domesticlabor #thementalload #unpaidlabor #millennialmoms #thementalloadofmotherhood #golfhusband
“We are able to and required to typically work our hobbies around the schedules of our families, whereas men's hobbies take them away from that,” Paige said. Men can take time away during caretaking hours because traditionally, women have been the default parents who are ultimately responsible for the brunt of the family’s domestic labor.
“So, men are able to leave the home for those extended periods of time during caretaking hours because they have a support at home. Most females do not feel like they have the same support when they would like to take on a hobby,” Paige said.
Paige proves the double standard by a hypothetical role reversal, such as joining a women’s golf league. “They may be met with a response that that is unfair, that takes them outside of the home, that is putting too much responsibility on the other partner, and that is not kind of equal division of labor, right?” she said.
This double standard has made Paige question whether moms enjoy the hobbies typically associated with married women. “Like often people joke like, oh, women love flowers and gardening. They don't all love that. One of the reasons they might get into it though is because they can do it from their home with their children. So it's something they can do together,” she said.
The post resonated with many women who want more balance in their relationships. "You could add to this video about mom's having guilt when it comes to their hobbies vs men who never think twice about taking part in their hobby," Michaela said.
"As a Dad, this is so aggravating. I cannot believe how many men do this to their partners," Steve Mollick added.
One mom chimed in with a clever way that her family deals with the gender hobby imbalance.
"My husband and I rotate weekend days off (I get Saturday, he gets Sunday usually) to be out of the house for 3 hours for whatever we want, and that has been the most amazing thing to happen to our relationship as a family. We both get time to decompress however we want every week," Lauren Reagan wrote.
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There's a reason why some people can perfectly copy accents, and others can't
Turns out, there's a neurodivergent link.
A woman in black long sleeve shirt stands in front of mirror.
Have you ever had that friend who goes on vacation for four days to London and comes back with a full-on Queen's English posh accent? "Oooh I left my brolly in the loo," they say, and you respond, "But you're from Colorado!" Well, there are reasons they (and many of us) do that, and usually it's on a pretty subconscious level.
It's called "accent mirroring," and it's actually quite common with people who are neurodivergent, particularly those with ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder). According Neurolaunch, the self-described "Free Mental Health Library," "Accent mirroring, also known as accent adaptation or phonetic convergence, is the tendency to unconsciously adopt the accent or speech patterns of those around us. This linguistic chameleon effect is not unique to individuals with ADHD, but it appears to be more pronounced and frequent in this population."
Essentially, when people have conversations, we're constantly "scanning" for information—not just the words we're absorbing, but the inflection and tone. "When we hear an accent, our brains automatically analyze and categorize the phonetic features, prosody, and intonation patterns," writes Neurolaunch. For most, this does result in copying the accent of the person with whom we're speaking. But those with ADHD might be more sensitive to auditory cues. This, "coupled with a reduced ability to filter out or inhibit the impulse to mimic…could potentially explain the increased tendency for accent mirroring."
While the article explains further research is needed, they distinctly state that, "Accent mirroring in individuals with ADHD often manifests as an unconscious mimicry of accents in social situations. This can range from subtle shifts in pronunciation to more noticeable changes in intonation and speech rhythm. For example, a person with ADHD might find themselves unconsciously adopting a Southern drawl when conversing with someone from Texas, even if they’ve never lived in the South themselves."
People are having their say online. On the subreddit r/ADHDWomen, a thread began: "Taking on accents is an ADHD thing?" The OP shares, "My whole life, I've picked up accents. I, myself, never noticed, but everyone around me would be like, 'Why are you talking like that??' It could be after I watched a show or movie with an accent or after I've traveled somewhere with a different accent than my 'normal.'
They continue, "Apparently, I pick it up fast, but it fades out slowly. Today... I'm scrolling Instagram, I watch a reel from a comedian couple (Darcy and Jeremy. IYKYK) about how Darcy (ADHD) picks up accents everywhere they go. It's called ADHD Mirroring??? And it's another way of masking."
(The OP is referring to Darcy Michaels and his husband Jeremy Baer, who are both touring comedians based in Canada.)
Hundreds of people on the Reddit thread alone seem to relate. One comments, "Omfg I've done this my whole life; I'll even pick up on the pauses/spaces when I'm talking to someone who is ESL—but English is my first language lol."
Sometimes, it can be a real issue for those around the chameleon. "I accidentally mimicked a waitress's weird laugh one time. As soon as she was out of earshot, my family started to reprimand me, but I was already like 'oh my god I don’t know why I did that, I feel so bad.'"
Many commenters on TikTok were shocked to find out this can be a sign of ADHD. One jokes, "Omg, yes, at a store the cashier was talking to me and she was French. She's like 'Oh are you French too? No, I'm not lol. I'm very east coast Canada."
And some people just embrace it and make it work for them. "I mirror their words or phrase! I’m 30. I realized I start calling everyone sweetie cause my manager does & I work at coffee shop."
This article originally appeared in May.