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Massachusetts woman writes her own obituary, leaving her grieving family laughing at her wit

"Well, if you're reading this obituary, I'm dead. WOW, it actually happened..."

Linda Murphy Obituary/McCarthy Funeral Home and Photo credit: Canva

Massachusetts woman's obituary leaves her family laughing

It can be depressing to think about your own mortality, but inevitably, everyone will eventually die. Those diagnosed with a terminal illness have the unfortunate task of thinking about the inevitability much sooner than their peers. Still, those like Linda Murphy aren't letting a diagnosis steal their humor.

Murphy seemed to be the life of the party, always ready to have a good time with friends and family. But over a decade ago, she was diagnosed with breast cancer; after beating that disease, she was diagnosed with Bulbar ALS, which runs in her family.

In her self-written obituary, she shares that her father, who passed away shortly before Murphy, lost his own mother to the same disease. Although devastating, the disease allowed her time to write her own obituary, which left her family and others giggling.

\u200bMassachusetts; Linda Murphy; ALS; obituary; death; dying; funny obituary Glowing tealights in peaceful ambiance.Photo credit: Canva

She starts by pointing out the obvious, "Well, if you are reading this obituary, it looks like I'm dead." That's when the humor kicks in as she jokes about dying from fear of missing out, "WOW, it actually happened ... I died of FOMO due to complications of Bulbar ALS."

Murphy points out that she was just 60 years old and way too young to die, but unfortunately, ALS had other plans. She was loved, as evidenced by her daughter's interview with the local news station. One section of her obituary is all about the yummy food she missed out on due to her no longer being able to swallow.

Linda Murphy; ALS; obituary; death; dying; funny obituary Friends enjoying a delicious meal together.Photo credit: Canva

"As far as eating, it totally stinks to sit at the table while people around you are eating juicy burgers hot off the grill, heaping piles of Chinese food, a healthy portion of pasta Alfredo, or Chipotle — and I just have to smile and act like I'm enjoying my bowl of puréed baby mush!" she wrote.

Even though she expressed how hard it was to live with her disease, Murphy still made sure to throw in some laughs.

While talking about her 42-year marriage to husband David, she teases about the couple becoming a throuple when she had to be put on a respirator. "We both agreed, I was an "A" wife and he was a "B+" husband for a total "A-" which is pretty decent for 42 years together!!!" she wrote. "We became a thruple about 1.5 years ago when, Hosee, (my respirator) moved into our marital bed. From then on, David woke up next to what looked like a fighter pilot with smooshed hair!"

Linda Murphy; ALS; obituary; death; dying; funny obituary Saying goodbye with lilies and love.Photo credit: Canva

Murphy highlights her superpowers before her final plea for kindness. The woman was joyous even after death. Maybe it was her way of easing things for her family members or for herself. Maybe it was simply because that's who she was as a person, and she used her obituary as the final moment to give others a glimpse into her personality. Either way, her reminders about kindness and living life fully are lessons that can extend far beyond her family and friends.

"I lived my life with two super powers," she wrote. "My first, of which everyone was jealous, was that I could drink as much as I wanted and never seemed to get a hangover ... the real wonder is why I didn't die of liver failure. My second super power is that I was always genuinely happy and absolutely loved to be with nice people. Please be kind to everyone: the telemarketer, the grocery clerk, the Dunkin's staff, the tailgater, your family, your friends. Speak nicely and positively. Is there really ever a reason to be negative? I don't think so…"

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Olivia Munn’s aggressive breast cancer and double mastectomy is a wakeup call to all women

She’d had a clean mammogram and tested negative for cancer genes just months before she was diagnosed.

Nicole Alexander/Wikimedia Commons

Olivia Munn at the 2018 MTV Movie & TV Awards

Actor Olivia Munn has announced that she's been diagnosed with an aggressive form of breast cancer and has undergone a double mastectomy, and her story is one all women need to read.

The 43-year-old, who has a 2-year-old son with comedian John Mulaney, shared her experience with photos, video and a written statement shared on Instagram.

"I was diagnosed with breast cancer," she wrote in the post caption. "I hope by sharing this it will help others find comfort, inspiration and support on their own journey."

Munn shared that she had taken a genetic test in February of 2023 in an effort to be proactive about her health and was relieved to find that she tested negative for all 90 cancer genes the test checked for, including the BRCA breast cancer gene. In the few months prior, she'd had a clear mammogram, so there wasn't any indication that anything was wrong.

"Two months later I was diagnosed with breast cancer," she wrote.

She explained that her OB-GYN had decided to calculate her Breast Cancer Risk Assessment Score, which takes into account age, lifestyle, family history, how old you were when you had your first child, and other factors that can impact your likelihood of having breast cancer.

When Munn's score came back with a 37% chance of having cancer, she was sent to get an MRI, which led to a biopsy, which found Luminal B cancer in both breasts.

"Luminal B is an aggressive, fast-moving cancer," Munn wrote. "30 days after that biopsy I had a double mastectomy. I went from feeling completely fine one day, to waking up in a hospital bed after a 10-hour surgery the next."

Munn said she's lucky because they caught it in time for her to have options. "I want the same for any woman who might have to face this one day. Ask your doctor to calculate your Breast Cancer Risk Assessment Score." Her doctor says if the score is higher than 20%, you should have an annual mammogram and MRI starting at age 30.

According to CNN, there are two models commonly used as breast cancer risk assessment tools: the Gail Model and the Tyrer-Cuzick Risk Assessment Calculator. Both have online versions that allow you to calculate your score for free, (though you should always consult your doctor with any concerns you might have). Munn wrote that she wouldn't have found her cancer for another year at her next mammogram if it weren't for her doctor calculating her risk score.

She also shared more of what followed her unexpected diagnosis:

"In the past ten months I have had four surgeries, so many days spent in bed I can't even count and have learned more about cancer, cancer treatment and hormones than I ever could have imagined. Surprisingly, I've only cried twice. I guess I haven't felt like there was time to cry. My focus narrowed and I tabled any emotions that I felt would interfere with my ability to stay clearheaded.

I've tended to let people see me when I have energy, when I can get dressed and get out of the house, when I can take my baby boy to the park. I've kept the diagnosis and the worry and the recovery and the pain medicine and the paper gowns private. I needed to catch my breath and get through some of the hardest parts before sharing."

Finally, she thanked all of her loved ones who have loved her through her breast cancer journey, including John Mulaney, who researched all of her medical procedures and made sure their son's framed photo was the first thing she saw when she woke up. She also thanked the medical team who has been caring for her, from her OB-GYN to her oncologist to the nurses and hospital support staff.

Munn sharing her story could help other women who may not know their risk or who may be complacent about breast cancer screenings to take a proactive approach.

To learn more about breast cancer, visit the American Cancer Society or the Breast Cancer Research Foundation.

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A tattoo artist is giving people free 'nipple tattoos' to help cancer survivors

Tattooing, like any other skill, requires practice. The problem is, how do you practice permanently putting a nipple on someone else's body?

This genius tattoo artist found a solution. "Shannon McCauley gives out free tattoos to the people who volunteer their bodies to help her practice tattooing nipples.

McCauley is a tattoo artist at Steadfast Tattoo in Rochester, NY. She went absolutely viral after tweeting a photo of a leg with a nipple with the caption, "Tattooed my first nipple on skin. I'll be covering this tattoo for free once it's healed. I'm learning this so I can tattoo in surgeon's offices and help breast cancer survivors that had mastectomies."



She later said she'll also use this skill for people in the trans community. Simply amazing. You can visit Shannon's instagram to see even more photos of nipples tattooed on legs.



Tattooing is very common for people that have gone through mastectomies because surgeons can only do so much in terms of pigmentation. Tattoos on the hand have a practically infinite range of shade and color. Artists like Shannon are necessary in helping people through the recovery process.

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A new breast cancer study has good news, but not everyone can celebrate equally.

For years, breast cancer patients, survivors, and their families have wondered if decades of walks, ribbons, fundraising, awareness, and dedicated activism were making a difference.

On Tuesday, a new batch of results came in.

A statistical analysis published by the American Cancer Society found that mortality rates from breast cancer fell 39% between 1989 and 2015.

The decrease amounts to 322,600 saved lives in 26 years, according to the paper's authors. Researchers attribute the drop to increased early detection and more effective treatment options.

The percentage of women over 40 who have had a mammogram in the prior two years grew from 29% in 1987 to 64% in 2015. Meanwhile, options for combatting the disease have increased, thanks to the advent of new drugs and therapies.

Hundreds of thousands of fewer people dying is good news.

The bad news is that black women continue to die from the disease at higher rates than any other demographic.

While a lower percentage of black women are dying from the disease overall, their fatality rates are still nearly 40% higher than those of white women, a rate that has remained maddeningly persistent for decades.

Photo by USAG, Humphreys/Flickr.

"The reason for the black and white difference is primarily related to economic status and lack of insurance on part of black women," Harold Freeman, former director of the American Cancer Society, told NPR in a 2014 interview.  "But also, we have a health care system that doesn't treat everyone equally." He cites a lack of ability to pay for preventive care and subconscious assumptions that lead some medical professionals to ignore black women's concerns as contributing factors.

The study also found that the racial mortality gap varied heavily by region. Disparities were worst in eight mostly southern states: Alabama, Louisiana, Mississippi, Missouri, North Carolina, Virginia, Indiana, and Michigan.

Eliminating the racial disparity when it comes to breast cancer diagnoses will require more than ribbons and walks to solve — and organizations are already rising to the challenge.

Groups like Breast Cancer Action have made racial justice a core plank, citing the need to address the disparities in education, housing, and economic power that exacerbate the mortality gap at its root.

As a stopgap, programs like the CDC's National Breast and Cervical Cancer Early Detection Program help provide early detection screenings to low-income and uninsured people.

While some states indeed showed large, persistent racial disparities in mortality rates, according to the study, the gap was nearly nonexistent in several others. Three states — California, Massachusetts, and Delaware — made significant, verifiable progress in making outcomes more equal over the 26-year span.

"This means that there is light at the end of the tunnel," Carol DeSantis, lead author of the study, told The Washington Post. "Some states are showing that they can close the gap."

For the 252,710 people expected to be diagnosed with breast cancer this year — and hundreds of thousands more in the years to come — the progress in treating the disease is a welcome sign.

The work to make sure they all have an equal shot at a full recovery remains.

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