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5 lessons from 9/11 that won't be in the history books.

Sept. 11, 2001, taught us things that will never make it into the history books. It's time to pass those lessons on.

community, catastrophe, 9/11, education, history
Image via Pixabay.

A shadow casts across the earth.

Right now, there are teenagers walking around texting, having their first kiss, and skipping class who have lived their entire lives after Sept. 11, 2001. Isn't that crazy?

I've been thinking a lot about kids lately. I've imagined what it would be like to raise a little human one day, and I've pictured all the memorable experiences that we will share together.

But it hit me just how many major moments in world history, like 9/11, that I have lived through that will be nothing more to my kids someday than pictures in a textbook or the subject of a summer blockbuster movie.


These children will probably learn the details of that day in school. They will read how many people lost their lives and about the political response that ultimately led to the war in Iraq.

But that time was so much more than news events and politics. 9/11 taught us deep lessons about life, humanity, and ourselves that will never make it into a history book. Which of those special lessons will we pass on to the next generation? Here are my five:

1. There is no such thing as "far away."

From the moment the towers fell, the news was full of theories about American "interests" and actions abroad. For those of us who were younger and not personally connected to any country outside the U.S., it may have been the first time we'd really given any thought to the relationship between the other side of the world and our own personal lives — let alone Middle East politics. It was the awakening of the idea of global connectedness for us.

It also exposed us to the love and support of people all over the world who had no reason to care about our pain beyond the simple fact that we are all human. 9/11 taught us that what happens in one place has ripple effects that extend across the globe. We should never stop looking out into the world and paying attention to issues, cultures, and global realities different from our own. We should never stop recognizing that it's our common humanity and our capacity for empathy that connect us all.

2. You can't put a timeline on healing.

Survivor Marcy Borders — who was photographed covered head to toe in dust in an iconic 9/11 photo — died of cancer at the age of 41. She believed that her illness was directly connected to effects from that day. And she may have been right. The CDC's World Trade Center Health Program reports that thousands of survivors and first responders have been diagnosed with cancers that resulted from the attack.

Healing from trauma can take an unpredictable amount of time.

These stories and the stories of survivors still battling PTSD offer us a valuable lesson: Just as America is still dealing with the vicious legacy of slavery over a century later, just as victims of childhood abuse may struggle with the effects well into their adulthood, healing from trauma in any form can take an unpredictable amount of time. The scars aren't always obvious and they usually can't be erased with a quick fix.

That's why we have to be able to look beyond what we can immediately see to be compassionate, understanding, and supportive of those who have been hurt — for as long it takes.

3. Behind every major headline is one person's story begging to be heard.

For weeks after the attacks, you couldn't turn on the TV without seeing a slideshow of faces. Every photo of a 9/11 victim was accompanied by a name and a story. Every person became more than just a number. They became real. Seeing their pictures and stories made me feel love and solidarity in a way that opened up my heart.

I learned then about something called statistical numbing. It's why we're less able to process the pain of thousands of people dying than we are when we hear the story of the loss of a single life. 9/11 helped me to think of every major story in the headlines — the mass genocide, hunger, and injustice that we hear about every day — as one person's story. Remembering this lesson can grow your heart a thousand times and inspire true empathy.

4. Your values will always be challenged in times of chaos. And that's exactly when they matter most.

I recently asked a friend of mine what she remembered about 9/11. Her answer shook me to my core. For her, it was the day that she started being harassed and mercilessly bullied at school. That was the day her parents sat her down and told her she was no longer safe. And that was the day that set in motion a series of events that ultimately forced her Muslim American family to move to a different neighborhood for fear of hate crimes.

After 9/11, America was so gripped with grief and panic that we allowed some of our most important values — diversity, equality, and privacy, for example — to be overtaken by fear. Just a quick look at the hashtag #AfterSeptember11 on Twitter reveals how many people are still suffering the consequences of this. What I learned in the aftermath of 9/11 is that, in the face of fear and chaos, it's vital to hold on to your values tightly. It may be difficult, but that's when those values are most at-risk.

5. There is a never-ending supply of good in the world.

It sounds cheesy, but over and over again, we see that in the midst of terrible times, the good in people continues to shine. Americans all over the country came together after 9/11. For a moment in time, all races, ethnicities, and religions joined together to mourn those who were lost, to rebuild what had fallen, and to create a renewed sense of community. It wasn't the first time that happened — and it certainly wasn't the last.

We saw it after Hurricane Katrina, after the 2010 earthquake in Haiti, and after the shootings at Sandy Hook. We continue to see it on a day-to-day basis. Like when thousands of people sent money to help a stranger they read about on the internet. 9/11 taught me the true value and impact of compassion. Our task, each and every day, is to live our lives at peak goodness and humanity — even when we're not in a crisis situation. If we do that, we'll never lose our sense of hope that the world truly can be a better place.

These are just a few of the lessons that I hope every child takes with them when they learn about Sept. 11, 2001.

What lessons would you share?




Photo by Mario Tama/Getty Images

Photo by Scott Olson/Getty Images.

via James Breakwell / Twitter

Raising kids is tough, but there's a lot of laughs along the way. Comedy writer James Breakwell has four daughters under the age of eight and shares their hilarious conversations on Twitter. And, from Breakwell's tweets, it looks like his five year old has a future in comedy. Here's a sampling of some Breakwell's funniest kid-inspired tweets.


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His 5-year-old isn't the only (often unintentionally) hilarious child in the house; the 7-year-old and 3-year-old turn up from time to time. There's also a 2-year-old, but she hasn't been the subject of many tweets yet.


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This article originally appeared four years ago.

@susandoingsusanthings/TikTok

Though this image might infuriate you, know there's more to the story.

We’ve probably all (especially moms and wives) have had it up to here with stories of men not being able to really pull their weight in partnerships.

So when I present to you a story about a husband leaving behind a sink full of dirty dishes for his wife to find, you’d probably sooner roll your eyes and contemplate hopping over to Instagram instead than give this one a read.

But hold on just a second, because this story has a surprising hopeful twist.

In a now-viral TikTok post, a wife named Susan shows the mess she woke up to the morning after her husband had friends over to watch a game.

She was initially fuming as she approached the disarray. That is, until she saw the note her husband left behind, saying “I got it!”

For Susan, this changed everything. Her husband acknowledged his mess, communicated that awareness with his wife, and didn’t leave it assuming someone else would take care of it. Which, in turn, made her feel seen and looked out for.

“I just love that he acknowledges that [he] left a mess in the sink, and don't worry, he'll take responsibility for it, but anyways, we've come so far,” Susan says in the clip.

@susandoingsusanthings Leaving a simple note instantly made me not care about the dishes in the sink!! I love communication and we have come so far!! #susandoingsusanthings #marriedlife #marriage #marriagehumor #marriagegoals #marriagecomedy #marriagelife ♬ original sound - SusanDoingSusanThings

Many viewers agreed that this small shift made a world of difference.

“I love this. Like he was tired and didn’t want to do it but knows you shouldn’t have to. What ace communication and all it took was a post-it” one person wrote.

Another echoed, “It’s that easy!!! Like do I want to do the dishes after hosting? Heck no. Let me sleep and I’ll do it in the morning. But the note changes it ALL 🥰.”

On the other hand, many people were still left frustrated, arguing that expectations were still far too low if this simple gesture is receiving such applause.

One person even lamented, “That big sigh and you’ve come so far, I wonder how many fights it took 😫,” to which Susan replied, “We’ve been together for 20 years… Fight = growth.”

She also reiterated that the purpose of the post was to show in real-time how healthy, thoughtful communication between partners can help transform even the most menial task into a positive, even relationship-fortifying, experience.

And that is probably the biggest, most beneficial takeaway to lean into here. Ongoing communication difficulties is listed as the number one cause of divorce, even beating out infidelity. Yes, of course, moms are tired of being the default parents and wives are tired of pulling double duty, but if this story is any indicator, they are also yearning for their partners to meet them halfway on the communication front as well.

And as we can see, even the smallest gestures make big impacts.

In case anyone was wondering: Susan's husband did do the dishes the next day. ❤️


This article originally appeared last year.

A dad got a sweet note from a fellow father after camping with his kids.

One of the hardest parts of being a parent is never being sure whether you're doing a good job or totally bombing it. If you're conscientious enough to even wonder if you're a good parent, you probably are, but parenting entails a million little choices and interactions, and there's always a lingering voice in your head saying, "What if you're really screwing this whole thing up?"

Reassurance and encouragement are always appreciated by parents, but not always received, which is why a note from one camping dad to another has people celebrating the kindness of anonymous strangers.

"You are killing it as a dad."

Someone on Yosemite Reddit thread shared a photo of a handwritten note with the caption, "To the man who left this thoughtful note on my windshield at Lower Pines Campground this weekend, I extend my heartfelt gratitude; your acknowledgment of my efforts to be a good father means a great deal to me."



The note reads:

"Bro,

I camped in the spot behind you last night. Let me just say, you are killing it as a dad. First off, I watched your wife guide you in as you backed up your trailer and nailed it on the first try without any yelling. Then your kids unloaded from the truck and were mild-mannered and well behaved. You told stories around the campfire and I had the pleasure of listening to the sounds of giggles and laughter.

From one dad to another, you are killing it. Keep it up.

P.S. Whatever you cooked for dinner smelled delicious!"

How often do we share these thoughts with strangers, even if we have them? And who wouldn't love to get a surprise bit of praise with specific examples of things we did right?

Everyone needs to hear a compliment once in a while.

So many people found the note to be a breath of fresh air and a good reminder to compliment people when we feel the urge:

"That would make any daddy's eyes water."

"It’s always nice, as a guy, to get a compliment."

"I complimented a guy's glasses at work (I'm also a guy, and btw they were really cool glasses, I wasn't just being nice) and now he keeps trying to tell me where he got his glasses and how I should get some. But I'm just having to be polite because I already have glasses and I'm not in the market. I finally had to tell him I'm not going to buy them lmao I just like them on him.

Made me feel like that's the first compliment he's had in years because he can't stop talking about it. Also I mainly liked the glasses because I think he's cute but he really thinks it's just the glasses haha jokes on him that cute bastard."

"I was in the store with my wife and one of our 'adopted nephews' yesterday (we’re close friends with his parents and we’ve known him and his brother since they were newborns and 2yo, respectively). A woman came up to me at checkout while my wife was running out to the car and said 'I’m not sure what your family relationship is here, but I just have to tell you how nice and refreshing it is to hear all the laughter and joy from the 3 of you. You both seem like such a good influence on him and it warms my heart.' It’s such a small thing but as a dude, I can’t remember the last time someone gave me a compliment in public and it made my freaking day."

"10/10 letter. The and not yelling part gave me a good chuckle lol."

"We need so much more of men getting such heartfelt and sincere compliments. Thanks for sharing. ❤️"

"I’ve never considered leaving a note, but when I see a harmonious family with good parenting, it’s healing for me. My childhood was awful."

"Such an awesome compliment! Even though I don't have children myself, I like to remind my friends too that they're doing great & it brings them happy tears."

"This made me cry. I love that you are getting your 'flowers.' My dad sucked, I’m so glad you are one of the good ones."

"This made me cry too. It’s so hard to be a human. Let alone a parent. Getting a good job sticker every now and then really means a lot these days."

"I'm a big bearded guy and I would cry if I got this note. More people like this, please."

The best part of this story is that no one knows who the dad who wrote the note is, not even the dad who shared it. It wasn't written for clout or notoriety, it wasn't to get attention or make himself look good. No name or signature, just an anonymous act of kindness to uplift a stranger whether he needed it or not.

We all need to hear or read kind things said about us, and sometimes it means even more coming from an anonymous stranger who has nothing to gain by sharing. A good reminder to share it when you feel it—you never know how many people you may move and inspire.

This article originally appeared last year.

Airport staff track down footage of woman's last moments with dad

After a woman lost her father suddenly, she remembered their last moments together were in an airport hugging goodbye so she reached out to see if they were willing to locate the footage. It was a day like any other day for Megan Cyr. The Canadian woman was visiting her father in due to fly back home from Winnipeg to Calgary only to miss her flight due to a mix up in time.

This seeming moment of misfortune turned out to be a gift of extra time with her dad before he died. She writes, "On December 28, 2020, I was set to leave Winnipeg and head to Calgary. However, I misread my departure time. My flight was at 7:00 AM, not 7:00 PM, as I had told my parents. I woke up that morning to realize the flight had already departed."


Cyr wasn't too concerned about the mix up in time. It was an easy fix with a quick call to the airline to get on a flight leaving the following day. Her extra day at home was a pleasant surprise for her dad as he was expecting her to already be back at her own home when he finished his shift at work. The pair spent the evening playing board games before she needed to head back to the airport in the morning.

Due to a delicious carry-on package that Cyr didn't want to see tossed in the trash if security wouldn't let it through, her dad hung back right out side the security checkpoint. He was on breakfast burrito rescue duty and took his job very seriously.


"My dad patiently waited to ensure no burrito was wasted. I gave him a thumbs-up once they went through the scanner, and that was the last time I saw him alive," Cyr shares.

That last goodbye was etched in the grieving daughter's memory. Knowing how special it was and likely never wanting to forget it, Cyr decided to take a chance and reach out to Winnipeg Richardson International Airport where she and her father had their last moments together. The woman knew the request for security footage was a long shot so after she sent the email she didn't think much about awaiting a response.


But to Cyr's delight she heard back, sharing, "every few days, I received an email from someone at the airport. I remember one stating the request had been moved to Upper Management and that there was hope. After a few exchanges, on January 20, 2021, I was gifted the video of our final moment together."

Thanks to the kindness and determination of Winnipeg airport staff, a grieving daughter has an unimaginable priceless gift–the gift of seeing her last embrace with her father. Cyr says while she'd much rather have her dad instead of a video that she will be forever grateful for the kindness of strangers.

"There is no logical reason I should have a video of our last goodbye. Typically, those moments are granted when we can anticipate someone’s death," Cyr writes, but the video of her getting an extra squeeze from her dad will be cherished forever.

A woman who is frustrated with her name.

It’s fair to blame parents if they give their child a name and the initials spell out something unseemly or embarrassing. They should have considered this before giving the child the name. However, you can’t blame someone with funny initials after getting married because no one will reject the love of their life for having a last name that starts with the wrong letter.

A woman shared that she can’t stand her initials because she can’t wear monogrammed clothing. "[My initials] are the bane of my existence, and I can never have traditional monogramming (first, last, middle) without it being a sandwich." Yes, her initials, in the traditional monogram form, are BLT. They are a tasty option for lunch but probably not something you’d want on a fancy necklace or bathrobe. She also refuses to eat the sandwich. "Raw tomatoes are disgusting to me personally,” she adds.

Why is it that in traditional monogram form, a married woman’s initials are different than if she was writing them first, middle, and last? “A monogrammed gift for a woman should include her first, middle, and last initial or, if she is married, her first, maiden name, and married name initials. Traditionally, a woman's monogram is presented in first, last, and middle initial order,” The Monogram merchant writes.

For example, Jacqueline Bouvier Kennedy would have a traditional monogram of JKB.



Some commenters shared their initials, and many were worse than BLT.

"My friend's is AIDS, so dont worry, i remember in secondary school having to sew our initials on pillows for home economics. I felt bad for her."

"I’m D.M.B. - all I’m missing is the U."

"Mine are TB.... just as unappealing haha."

"My initials are BS, so don't feel bad. I get cracked on all the time."

"Hubs initials are ET. Cue 'ET phone home,' circa the '80s from all his so called friends at work."



"My initials are RAD, lol."

"I knew a girl with the initials PMS, I think food is better than that."

"Mine happen to spell 'ELF', and I hated it as a kid. Now I embrace it, lol."

"My brother’s are R.A.T. He kinda embraced it, an animal lover and all."

"I'm APE lol."



It was once believed that having unfortunate initials meant more than suffering the occasional embarrassment—they could take years off your life. In 1999, a study found that men with positive initials, such as WOW or JOY, lived 4.5 years longer than those with neutral initials, while those with negative initials, such as DIE or ROT, died 2.8 years later.

The idea was that people with negative initials subconsciously think less of themselves, which could lead to an unhealthy lifestyle compared to someone with positive initials. However, six years later, that study was debunked by a subsequent study that found there is “no persuasive biological theory of how longevity should be significantly affected by initials."

Pamela Redmond Satran, author of "Baby Names Now," says we should still consider initials when naming children.

"Every conventional naming book gives the guideline, 'Don't forget to look at the initials,'" Satran said, according to CBS News. "Even if the second study contradicts the first, and having bad initials is not going to shorten your life span, it could make what there is of your life less pleasant. And who wants to foist that on innocent children?"