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'It kinda made me laugh': Mother of Brooklyn pre-schooler sees a big shift in baby names

Are these people ahead or behind the baby name curve?

via Susan Jane Golding/Flickr

A group of school kids in New York City.

The funny thing about baby names is that they are incredibly personal and also entirely dependent on current trends. Baby name experts say that there is roughly a 100-year trend where specific names become extremely popular and then become “old people names” until they are brought back by a younger generation who finds them cool.

A TikToker named Laura, who lives in Brooklyn, New York, noticed that parents in her borough, which is known for being a bit ahead of the cultural curve, have pivoted to giving their children traditional baby names. She believes this trend is a counter to another popular trend in baby names: “Trajedeighs” or giving children relatively common names with quirky, unconventional spellings such as Zackiri (Zacahry), Bittneigh (Brittany), or Ashleigh (Ashly).

@laurainbk

What are baby names like these days where you live? #babynames #names #nametrends #babyname #baby

Are traditional names making a comeback?

“We got my two-year-old daughter's class list, and it kind of made me laugh because, while in some parts of the country, people are naming their kids like Breighlynn and Braxleigh and Peightyn and whatever, I guess, in Brooklyn, we're going in the complete opposite direction,” Laura shared in her video.

Here are some of the names of kids in her daughter's class:

Edith

Oscar

Arthur

Nicholas

Bonnie

Owen

Henry

Ruby

Lewis

The post inspired many people in the comments to share updates on the name trends in their area. “I heard this joke that the preschool classes in NYC are the same as the boat passenger list at Ellis Island,” a commenter wrote.

“Mind you, I'm in California and my kids friends are Coyote, Denver, Sahara, Dior, Storm, Silver, Story, Velvet, Lion,” a Californian wrote. “Seattle Preschool teacher here. I had a class with Edith, Eleanor, Ernestine, Ruby, and Louise once. Called them my old lady gang,” a teacher in Seattle wrote.


Why do names rise and fall in popularity?

This unique cultural back and forth, where society collectively makes a name popular and then once it reaches its peak, abandons it altogether, is known as “frequency-dependent selection.” It works for names, as well as dog breeds. Historically, certain dog breeds have risen in popularity, such as Dalmatians in the 1940s or Rottweilers in the 1990s, only to fall out of favor once they become too trendy.

“Frequency-dependent selection is just a fancy way of saying that there is a pressure to be the same or different,” Mitchell Newberry, an assistant professor of complex systems at the University of Michigan, told Vice. “If a name gets too popular, then people don’t want to use it anymore, and there’s pressure to be different.” In fact, when we look at baby name trends, you can see that they follow a very predictable trajectory. A step rise in popularity, a brief plateau, and then a decline that was almost as rapid as its ascent.

The predictable cycles in baby names and dog breed popularity are eye-opening because they make you wonder how often we make authentic choices in life. How many of the decisions that we make are based on either joining the crowd or intentionally running in the opposite direction? If all we do is simply react to the behaviors of others, when are we truly being ourselves?

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'We're naming a child, not a dog': Man fights with wife over naming baby 'Zoomer'

Has the unusual baby name trend gone too far or is he stuck in the past?

via Polina Zimmerman/Pexels

A couple arguing over what to name their baby

Over the past decade or so, there has been a trend of parents choosing to give their children unique names. “We are deep in an era of naming individuality, where parents assume that having a [name] sound distinctive and unique is a virtue,” Laura Wattenberg, the founder of the naming-trends site Namerology, told The Atlantic.

There are multiple reasons for this change in American culture. One is that people have fewer children, so their uniqueness has become more important for parents. Another is that baby name data has pushed parents to go to further lengths to come up with names that won’t make them the third John or second Maria in a classroom.

The internet has also played a role in the change. People with unique names stand out online. Good luck if you’re looking on Facebook for a former classmate named Matt Smith.

Joe Pinsker at The Atlantic also points out that picking a unique name has become a trend, so it has become a type of conformity. “Trying not to be like everyone else makes you just like everyone else,” Pinsker wrote.

The unique name trend has also caused friction among parents. A father-to-be who goes by the name Aaronsaway on Reddit asked the AITA forum whether he was in the wrong for being “rude” to his wife for shooting down her unique baby names.

The boy’s name that caused the most drama was Zoomer.

“My wife and I are expecting our first child in the coming months and we have chosen not to find out the sex until the baby is born. Things are starting to feel very real now so we’ve started to properly discuss names, but we’ve realized we both have vastly different tastes in name style and we are having a hard time finding the right one,” Aaronsaway wrote.

He says that his wife likes unique names that he finds “tacky and silly,” while he prefers “traditional names.”

“Last night she showed me a short list she had put together and thought I might like. The names on the list were:

Girl: Fern, Fennix, Rhodes, Faun, Brixtyn, and Kinley

Boy: Spark, Diesel, Quincy, Phoenix, Buck, and Fox”

Aaronsaway countered by suggesting some traditional versions of the names she chose.

But Aaronsaway finally snapped when his wife suggested Zoomer for a boy.

“I asked if she was serious and said it was a stupid name. She asked what my problem was and why I was so dismissive of all her ideas and shooting down all the names she likes. I told her we were naming a child and not a dog, and that names can have a huge impact on the child,” Aaronsaway wrote. “I said I don’t want my child to be bullied or taken less seriously because they have a ridiculous name. She told me I was rude and that I was the bully for making her feel unsupported.”

The wife started crying and went to bed.

So, is the dad-to-be right in dismissing his wife’s unique suggestions or should he get with the times and give his child a one-of-a-kind name?

The commenters overwhelmingly supported Aaronsaway.

The most popular comment came from AsOne8433, who wrote: "So many people naming their kids like a 9-year-old naming a goldfish or a valley girl naming a pocket dog. Unfortunately, it indicates that the parent considering these names does not see the child as a person, but a thing, an amusing accessory to show all her fans how cool she is."

Willing-Helicopter26 agreed.

"I definitely feel like you should discuss names you like and consider a more unique middle name, but ultimately this IS a person not a pet," they wrote. "Lots of these names are more appropriate for pets. Your wife needs to be a bit more grounded in her selections. Fern isn't bad. Quincy isn't terrible, either. But please don't name your kid Zoomer."

The few dissenters didn’t like the way he talked to his wife.

“You're allowed to not like her name choices, and she's allowed to not like yours. You're allowed to veto one another—but not to be mean to each other,” NightOwlEye wrote.

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Husband asks if he's being 'controlling' for rejecting his wife's 'ridiculous' baby names

He refused to name his daughter Caeleigh.

via Cottonbro Studio/Pexels

A couple debates whether to name their baby Caeleigh.

There has been a significant change in how Americans name their children over the past few decades. Years ago, parents gave their children names that helped them fit in, and now they want them to have names that stand out.

Laura Wattenberg, founder of the naming trends site Namerology, told The Atlantic that in 1950 the percentage of babies born that received a common name was around 28%. However, in 2023, that number has dropped to just 7%.

“We are deep in an era of naming individuality, where parents assume that having a [name] sound distinctive and unique is a virtue,” Wattenberg told The Atlantic. The competition between parents to come up with unique names means that they risk giving their child one that’s so outlandish it could cause them trouble down the line.

Multiple studies show that having an unusual name can hamper a child’s economic and social prospects.

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A husband and wife at odds over a baby name

via Cottonboro Studio/Pexels

A father-to-be recently fought with his pregnant wife over what to name their daughter, and it sparked a good debate on Reddit. A user named NeverlyLane asked the AITA forum if he was wrong for rejecting his wife’s unusual name suggestions.

“I suggested my all-time favorite name, Anna. My wife suggested Caeleigh (pronounced Kailey, and yes, she spelled it out). I vetoed it,” the husband said.

“She suggested another name, Ryleigh (Riley, and again she did spell it out). I vetoed it and suggested Riley spelled the normal way. She refused. She then suggested Novalynn. I vetoed, suggesting Nora as an alternative. She again refused,” he continued.

The mother may be trying to be unique by coming up with names where the “ly” is replaced with “leigh,” but it’s a popular choice nowadays. Replacing “ly” with “leigh” is one of the biggest trends in baby names over the past few years.

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A couple fighting over a baby name

via Cottonboro Studios/Pexels

The mom-to-be couldn’t handle the rejection, so she lashed out at her husband. “What’s the point in talking about it if you veto all my choices, you controlling a**hole!” she said. “Maybe if you picked something normal, we might get somewhere, but you won’t even try to compromise!” the husband responded.

Looking to see if he was right, he posted about the exchange on Reddit, and just about everyone agreed with him.

"You’re doing your daughter a favor by vetoing these names," Cautious-Spited wrote. "Thank you for standing up for your unborn child. People should really stop naming their children traghedeighs and consider the fact that they will be adults one day," Reb-Lev added.

"You should suggest brockleigh," throwaway6827206t joked.

"Yeah, mom may never see it this way, but maybe if she can imagine being her kid and having to either explain how to pronounce or spell their name correctly over and over for their entire life—substitute teachers, doctor’s appointments, as an adult meeting with new clients/staff/customers EVERY SINGLE TIME…that’s not a burden you should put on your child for a first name just because you think it makes the name cooler," RavenWood_9 wrote.

The husband showed his wife the thread, and she agreed that her spellings were a little “out there.” The couple then compromised by choosing uncommon names with a history. “Anyway, we eventually decided on Reya Annaliese as our working first choice, with Mercy, Freya, and Eloise as our backups,” the husband wrote.

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