upworthy

Golden Years

Golden Years

A senior citizen was about to be scammed out of $9,000. A Canadian bank teller saved the day.

"His biggest blessing is losing a couple of hundred and not thousands."

Photo Credit: Canva

A scammer on the computer. A senior citizen falls for it.

Scam artists have gotten more advanced when it comes to diabolically tricking people out of their money, especially senior citizens. And now with cryptocurrency, which is confusing to many and completely accessible online, there's an added layer of concern for the most vulnerable.

Which is why, more than ever, people need to be on the lookout for swindlers. Luckily, some really good folks are stepping up. On the subreddit r/scams, there are 1.6 million weekly visitors; time and time again, they help alert people to perpetual fraud.

One bank teller posted, "You all saved my customer today" and then told a heroic story about an elderly customer attempting to deposit a check.

"I had a customer come in today and he had a cheque that he wanted to deposit," the bank teller wrote. "Super normal, no red flags. He asked about how long the hold will be. Still, no red flags. Since we're in Canada and we celebrate Victoria Day, the banks are closed on Monday. So, his 5 business day hold will take us to May 21."

banks, bank teller, elderly, senior citizens, scams A bank teller dispenses money at a bank. www.flickr.com

Here's where things took a turn. "I told him that and he said he needs at least $9000 released right away," the bank teller added. "Now I'm even more curious and I asked why. He said he needs 10% to send to his crypto account so he can withdraw the $90,000 USD that his crypto account has generated."

Luckily, this bank teller's antenna went up. "Skeptical, I asked what account, how he opened it, the website—the whole ordeal," the bank teller wrote. "To my surprise, he told me. He clicked on a FACEBOOK AD and deposited a couple of $100 back a few months ago and now it's generated to $90,000 USD. But in order to get the $90,000—he needs to deposit $9,000."

"Yeah, no. I told him he's being scammed, grabbed my phone, and showed him the numerous crypto scams posted on reddit," the bank teller added. "I said his biggest blessing is losing a couple of $100 and not thousands."

There are over one hundred comments on this thread alone. One pointed out: "We all have a blind spot. In reality, most of us over fifty are hesitant to listen to our family members and neighbors. Stubborn. We think we are so smart, and gotta maintain that street cred. It took a nurse I had never met to get my attention about a health issue. It may take a bank employee to open my eyes about something like this. Thank you for diving into his problem."

This person noted how refreshing it was to see that the customer, who had truly gotten their hopes up, actually listened to the teller: "The biggest surprise here is that he actually listened and was willing to believe he'd been scammed. We see so many horror stories about people sticking their heads in the sand and refusing to accept reality, it's such a nice change of pace."

There are so many other stories that run the gamut of scams across every platform. One person told a harrowing story of their mother who got defrauded out of her entire retirement fund. The thread has over 500 comments of suggestions, as well as communal support.

@droidsavvy

Some have no idea about these 🫡

The good news is there are ways to combat these fraudsters. First, it's important to know what to look for.

The National Council on Aging (NCOA) recently posted the top five scams targeting seniors. These include "The Grandparent Scam," in which someone impersonates a grandchild asking for help, scams that appear to be loans from reputable banks, "tech support scams" (which I have personally fallen for), government scams asking for private information like Social Security numbers, and one of the most upsetting—the romance scam.

"As more people turn to online dating, con artists are seizing the opportunity," NCOA's Jessica Johnson wrote. "Romance scammers create fake social media profiles and use them to gain trust and steal money. In some cases, these scammers may be (or pretend to be) overseas. They may ask their victims to pay for visas, medical emergencies, and travel expenses to come to the U.S."

Johnson adds that as of two years ago, these scams have totaled well over one billion dollars in loss.

-Dr. Regina Koepp gives tips on scammers. www.youtube.com, Dr. Regina Koepp

As for what you can do? First, know—and let those in your life know—that if you get scammed, don't be embarrassed. Have consistent conversations about how clever these scammers have become and how common they are. Advise anyone who might be vulnerable to never give out important information to someone emailing or calling for it.

If it happens, contact local police, banks, and the Federal Trade Commission. Adult Protective Services also has resources on how to get started.

The FTC also posted these helpful tips:

  1. "Never transfer or send money to anyone, no matter who they say they are, in response to an unexpected call or message. Even if they say it’s to 'protect it.'"
  2. "Hang up and verify. Hang up the phone and call the company or agency directly using a phone number or website you know is real. Don’t trust what an unexpected caller says, and never use the phone number in a computer security pop-up or an unexpected text or email."
  3. "Block unwanted calls. Learn about your call blocking options to stop many of these scammers before they reach you."

The topic gained extra attention last year with the film Thelma, in which actress June Squibb plays a woman on a mission to recover her scammed money (her methods are not recommended, but the film, based loosely on a true story, is aces).

June Squibb stars in the movie Thlema. www.youtube.com, Magnolia Pictures

From Your Site Articles
scams
Golden YearsIdentity
Golden Years

'Boomer panic' is a real phenomenon, and there's a heartbreaking reason for it

This isn't just young generations bashing the old.

Photo credit: Canva

Boomer panic is real.

In a video posted in September 2023, TikToker @myexistentialdread used the phrase “boomer panic” to explain how baby boomers (1946 to 1964) can quickly become unhinged when faced with the most minor problems. It all started when she visited a Lowe’s hardware store and encountered a boomer-aged woman working at the check-out stand.

“I had a dowel that didn’t have a price tag on it, whatever, so I ran back and took a photo of the price tag. And as I was walking back towards her, I was holding up my phone… because I had multiple dowels and that was the one that didn’t have the price tag on it,” she said in the video. “And she looks at me and she goes, ‘I don’t know which one that is,’ and she starts like, panicking.” The TikToker said that the woman was “screechy, panicking for no reason.”

older woman upset, boomer reactions, boomer panic Older people can become frustrated over seemingly small things.Photo credit: Canva

Many people raised by boomers understood what she meant by "boomer panic." "Boomer panic is such a good phrase for this! Minor inconvenience straight to panic," the most popular commenter wrote. And while there was some unfortunate boomer-bashing in the comments, some younger people tried to explain why the older folks have such a hard time regulating their emotions: “From conversations with my mother, they weren’t allowed to make mistakes and were harshly punished if they did.” The TikToker responded, “A lot of people mentioned this, and it breaks my heart. I think you’re right,” Myexistentialdread responded.

A follow-up video by YourTango Editor Brian Sundholm tried to explain boomer panic in an empathetic way.

“Well, it's likely that there actually was a reason the woman started panicking about a seemingly meaningless problem,” Sundholm said. “Most of us nowadays know the importance of recognizing and feeling our emotions.” Sundholm then quoted therapist Mitzi Bachman, who says that when people bottle up their emotions and refuse to express them, it can result in an "unhinged" reaction.

TikToker Gabi Day shared a similar phenomenon she noticed with her boomer mom; she called the behavior “anxiety-at-you.”

Day’s boomer mother was “reactive,” “nervous,” and “anxious” throughout her childhood. Now, she is still on edge with Day’s children. “She's immediately like gasping and just really like exaggerated physical reactions, and then, of course, that kind of startles my kid,” Day said. “Again, I know that this comes from a place of care. It's just a lot,” she continued.

@itsgabiday

It comes from a place of love but it is exhausting 🫠😬 #millennialmomsoftiktok #boomergrandma #reparenting #gentleparenting

There is a significant difference in emotional intelligence and regulation between how boomers were raised and how younger generations, such as Gen X, millennials, and Gen Z, were brought up. Boomers grew up when they had to bottle up their feelings to show their resilience. This can lead to growing anger, frustration with situations and people, chronic stress, and anxiety—all conditions that can lead to panicky, unhinged behavior.

Ultimately, Sundholm says that we should sympathize with boomers who have difficulty regulating their emotions and see it as an example of the great strides subsequent generations have made in managing their mental health. “It may seem a little harsh to call something 'boomer panic,' but in the context of how many of them were raised, it makes a lot of sense,” Sundholm says. “It also underlines the importance of emotional regulation skills and teaching them to future generations. And maybe most important, having compassion for those who never had a chance to learn them.”

older person's hands holding a younger person's hands, compassion for elderly Having compassion for older generations can go a long way.Photo credit: Canva

This article originally appeared in March.

From Your Site Articles
mental health
Golden YearsIdentity
Golden Years

Study discovers people don't age steadily, but in dramatic bursts at two specific ages

This explains SO much about your 40s.

Photo by Nati/Pexels

If you feel "old" practically overnight, there may be a good reason for that.

Aging is weird. You're trucking along, enjoying your middle-aged life, finally feeling like a real adult, when you look in the mirror one day and gasp. "Where did those wrinkles come from?" "Is that skin on my arm…crepey?!?" "Why am I aching like that?"

Somewhere in your mid-40s, you start noticing obvious signs of aging that seem to arrive overnight. You assumed it was a gradual process that you just hadn't noticed, but it sure as heck felt like it happened really fast.

New research indicates that may very well be the case. A 2024 study from researchers at Stanford tracked thousands of different molecules in people age 25 to 75 and found that people tend to make two big leaps in aging—one around age 44 and another around age 60. These findings indicate that aging can actually happen in bursts.

aging, age, old, growing up, growing old, 40s, 60s Simpsons Gif y.yarn.co

“We’re not just changing gradually over time. There are some really dramatic changes,” said senior study author Michael Snyder, Ph.D., a geneticist and director of the Center for Genomics and Personalized Medicine at Stanford University. “It turns out the mid-40s is a time of dramatic change, as is the early 60s. And that’s true no matter what class of molecules you look at.” The researchers assumed the mid-40s changes would be attributed to menopausal or perimenopausal changes in women influencing the overall numbers, but when they separated the results by sex they saw similar changes in men in their 40s.

@suddenly_susan_

The accuracy 🤣 #40s #genxtiktok #womenover40 #relatable

"“This suggests that while menopause or perimenopause may contribute to the changes observed in women in their mid-40s, there are likely other, more significant factors influencing these changes in both men and women. Identifying and studying these factors should be a priority for future research,” said study author Xiaotao Shen, PhD, a former Stanford Medicine postdoctoral scholar who now teaches at Nanyang Technological University in Singapore.

elderly couple, aging, age, growing old, aging in bursts Aging happens in bursts, scientists find.Canva Photos

The study included 108 participants who submitted blood and other samples every few months for several years. The scientists tracked age-related changes in 135,000 different molecules—nearly 250 billion distinct data points—to see how aging occurs.

The study may shed light on the reasons for jumps in certain diseases and maladies at certain ages. For the 40-somethings, scientists found significant changes in molecules related to alcohol, caffeine, and lipid metabolism, cardiovascular disease, and skin and muscle. For those in their 60s, changes related to carbohydrate and caffeine metabolism, immune regulation, kidney function, cardiovascular disease, and skin and muscle were found.

body, human body, anatomy, study, aging Research shows the body goes through specific changes in our 40s and 60s.Canva Photos

The study authors did note that lifestyle might play a role in some of these changes. For instance, alcohol metabolism may be influenced by people drinking more heavily in their 40s, which tends to be a period of higher stress for many people. However, the researchers added that these bursts of aging in the mid-40s and early 60s indicate that people may want to pay closer attention to their health around those ages and make lifestyle changes that support greater overall health, such as increasing exercise or limiting alcohol.

The research team plans to study the drivers of these aging bursts to find out why they happen at these ages, but whatever the reasons, it's nice to know that the seemingly sudden onset of age-related woes isn't just in our imaginations.

It's understandable that we worry about aging, as physical signs of aging remind us of our own mortality. We also have all kinds of social messaging that tells us youth is ideal and beautiful and old is bad and ugly, so of course we give aging the side-eye. But none of us can avoid aging altogether, so the more positive and healthy we are in our approach to aging, the better off we'll be, no matter when and to what degree aging hits us.

This story originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

From Your Site Articles
aging
Golden YearsIdentity
Golden Years

7 'old people' sayings that are actually solid life advice at every age

"Make all your words sweet because tomorrow you may have to eat them."

Photo credit: Canva

Elder wisdom can come in handy.

With age comes wisdom, or at least we hope it does. As we get older, we collect life lessons that we can pass along to younger generations, sometimes with lengthy stories, sometimes with quippy sayings.

Adages like "A penny saved is a penny earned," or "Early to bed, early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise," have been part of our collective treasure chest of life advice for generations, but the aphorisms that spring from the experience of our loved ones and mentors are often the most meaningful.

Someone shared that they'd read and appreciated this old man's advice: “My grandpa once told me 'if you get on the wrong train, get off at the nearest station, the longer it takes you to get off, the more expensive the return trip will be.' He wasn’t talking about trains.” The person asked for more tidbits of wisdom from old folks and people started sharing sayings they heard from their elders growing up.

Here are some of the best "old man advice" sayings and how they can be applied in a person's life.

"You might miss what’s ahead of you if you keep concentrating on what’s in the rear view mirror."

Another commenter put it another way: "Don't look behind you, you aren't going that way." This adage is about not dwelling on the past. Many of us have a tendency to spend more time mentally in the past, rehashing old memories or being nostalgic for what once was, than we do in the present or looking forward to the future. There's nothing wrong with a little reflection, but if most of our focus is in the past, we miss out on the present. Rear view mirrors are for quick glances, not where our focus should be.

"Do the right thing, even if nobody is watching."

This saying is about good character and true integrity. If you notice someone drop a $20 bill and no one is around to see but you, do you give it back to them or do you pick it up and keep it? If you realize that a store didn't charge you for an item, do you point it out and make it right or do you allow the mistake to remain? There are opportunities each day for us to choose between right and wrong, and those choices really speak to who we are if they are made without anyone else knowing.

Lisa and Bart Simpson discuss combining showmanship with integrity, outdoors.bart simpson episode 21 GIFGiphy


"Be nice to everybody you meet on the way up the ladder. You'll see the same faces on the way down "

Don't get cocky and don't burn bridges you think you won't need to return to. There's value in being kind for its own sake, but there's also the reality that being kind also makes people like you. When people like you, they're more likely to lend you a helping hand, and you never know when you're going to be in a position to need one. It's also a good reminder that you're not inherently better than anyone else just because of where you are in life. We're all constantly in flux, so it's important to stay humble and kind.

In other words, "Make all your words sweet because tomorrow you may have to eat them."

"One of the most powerful negotiating tools is silence."

The power of silence in general is often underrated, but it can be an especially useful tool in a negotiation. Some people are so uncomfortable with silence that they will make concessions simply to avoid it. And sometimes the best response to an unreasonable demand is to just say nothing and stare, letting the other party come to the realization themselves. It takes calm confidence to simply be quiet and let the silence fill the room, which can feel surprisingly intimidating.

Person giving a playful side-eye with a slight grin, wearing a black jacket; "BOUNCE" logo visible.Eddie Murphy Shut Up GIF by BounceGiphy

"Always listen to your gut, even if you can’t explain it."

Ah, the strange and mysterious sense of intuition that we can't really describe but know when we feel it. Whether it's getting a creepy vibe about a person or a little voice telling you to do or not do something, those "gut instincts" can serve us well. Of course, if we are prone to anxiety, our instincts can sometimes be confused with anxious thoughts, but "go with your gut" is solid advice anyway.

“It doesn’t matter what path you’re on if it’s the wrong mountain.”

Sometimes people trying to find their way end up hitting roadblock after roadblock, which may mean they just haven't found the right path yet or might mean they need an entire overhaul of their life. That might look like switching career paths entirely, rather than trying to find a job in your field that fits. It might mean changing majors in the middle of your studies when you find yourself not enjoying any of your classes. It might mean finding a new community or reevaluating your relationships.

"The harder I work, the luckier I get."

Several sayings line up with this one, like "Luck is the intersection of preparation and opportunity," and "Luck favors the prepared mind." There's a lot to be said for fortune and hard work going hand in hand. If we expect good things to just land in our lap, we will likely be disappointed, but if we move in the direction of things we want to happen and do the work of preparing for good things to come our way, "luck" frequently seems to follow.

Finding a saying that resonates can be really helpful when we're facing a specific challenge in life, especially when we commit it to memory and repeat it often.

This article originally appeared in March.

From Your Site Articles
life advice
Golden YearsIdentity
Trending Stories