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Married couple sticks it to nosy friends and relatives with viral 'announcement' prank

They got so tired of the baby question, they decided a formal announcement was in order.

Photo via Carrie Jensen/Imgur, used with permission.
One couple's perfect response to people asking when they're going to have kids.

Every couple has gotten the question at some point, especially from pesky parents and in-laws. It's a rite of passage when your relationship starts to become serious, and it only ramps up faster and faster after you get married: "When are you guys going to start having kids?"

Like many couples, Carrie Jansen and her husband Nic had heard this question a million different ways, a million different times.

The pressure really started to mount after the pair got married. While Carrie loves kids (she's an elementary school teacher, after all), she and Nic simply aren't interested in having kids of their own. Now or ever.

"It's not what I was meant for," explains Carrie in a Facebook message. "It's like, I love flowers, and everyone loves flowers. But that doesn't mean I want to grow my own. I'm perfectly happy admiring other people's gardens."

Carrie wanted to tell her family that they don't plan on having kids but knew if she did, they'd say something like, "Oh you'll change your mind one day!" and that pesky question would keep rearing its ugly head. So she decided to get creative.

Ah, yes, people who have chosen not to have kids absolutely love having their thoughtful decision immediately dismissed as silliness! Worse, there's the camp that insists they'll regret it one day, and begs the couple to reconsider.

Still, it's not an easy conversation to have with loved ones and relatives.

"We don't want kids, but if it’s Grandma asking, I won’t tell her straight up...because we don’t want to give her a heart attack," Carrie told Buzzfeed. "So usually, I’ll give her the general ‘We’ll see!’ or ‘Not this year!’”

pregnancy, moms, motherhood, family, couples, childfree, culture, love, relationships, marriage, petsDressed to the nines on their wedding day. Photo via Carrie Jansen, used with permission.

Rather than continue to deflect the question over and over, Carrie decided that a clear and formal announcement made sense. But how to make the announcement was another matter. How could she and Nic strike the right tone? Serious, but not morose. Firm, but playful. Final, but optimistic.

But that's not to say that the couple wasn't planning on making any big changes. In fact, they were adding another mouth to feed to the family, and they decided to announce it with a series of maternity-style photos, revealing the twist:

The new addition was a puppy named Leelu, not a baby.

"My husband and I have been married 3 years and everyone is bugging us about having a baby. Close enough right?" she captioned the photos shared to Facebook and Imgur.

pregnancy, moms, motherhood, family, couples, childfree, culture, love, relationships, marriage, petsLook at my newborn baby... puppy. Photo via Carrie Jensen/Imgur, used with permission.

Her pictures went massively viral, with many of the commenters giving her props for hilariously addressing the dreaded "kids " question.

"If you don't want kids, don't have kids. Seriously. Have fun with each other. I had three kids early and it's all about them now," wrote one commenter.

"I wish people would just mind their business raising a kid ain't easy and cheap," wrote another.

"I got my husband a vasectomy for his birthday this year. Best gift ever," chimed in a third.

Carrie was overwhelmed and inspired by the viral response. "Having children is definitely a hot topic, and one that is evolving in this generation like so many other social issues," she says. "It's exciting to find others that feel the same way I do.”


pregnancy, moms, motherhood, family, couples, childfree, culture, love, relationships, marriage, petsThe happy, child-free couple at the beach.Photo via Carrie Jensen/Imgur, used with permission.

Carrie is hardly alone in not wanting to have kids — in fact, a record number of women are choosing not to have kids today.

Pew Research recently concluded that 47% of adults 18-49 say they're "unlikely" to ever have children, a number that has grown steadily over the years. Statistica backs this claim up, finding that 46.9% of women aged 15-50 in the United States are childless. Despite the numbers, however, because we still live in a patriarchally-driven society, women regularly face the expectation that they should be mothers, and they often are judged if they decide not to be.

When you think about it, it's pretty baffling! Child-free people are not some fringe minority. They make up about half of all adults. It should be viewed as a completely normal choice that requires no explanation or, yes, even funny gimmick announcements.

Whether you want to have one kid, five kids, no kids, or a puppy, the choice should be yours and no one else's.

There are a lot of reasons couples might choose not to have children. It could come down to the cost, the stress, the loss of freedom — or simply because they don't want to.

What's especially great about Nic and Carrie's viral post is that it went on to inspire other couples to do the same: Make cheeky announcements about puppies, their decision to go child-free, or even their vasectomies!

No one else has the right to put pressure on you to change your body and life in a drastic way. Thankfully, because of women like Carrie — and partners like Nic — who aren't afraid to bring the subject out in the open, the expectations are slowly but surely changing.

This article originally appeared nine years ago.

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Modern Families

Parents who had kids over 35 share the complex truths about being 'old' moms and dads

"I've been called their grandmother a handful of times now, but I find it hilarious."

Image via Canva

People who had kids over 35 share their experience being 'older' parents.

More Americans are becoming parents at older ages. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), the average age for women in the United States who have their first child is 27.5 years old. In another study from the National Center for Health Statistics (NCHS), between 1990 and 2023, the fertility rate for women ages 35 to 39 increased 71%,. For women ages 40 to 44, the rate increased 127%.

Yet, having kids after 35 is a unique experience. In a Reddit forum, member @rainybitcoin posed the question: "Parents who were over 35 when your kids were born—how is it now?" They went on to add, "What was it like being the 'old mom' or 'old dad' (or were you?) and what is it like now your kids are older?"

Parents who had kids later in life offered their firsthand experience and advice on what it's really like. These are 15 of the most honest (and real) responses.

having kids, becoming parents, parenthood, having a kid, parentingTired Episode 2 GIF by FriendsGiphy

"I had mine at 40/42. Now they are in their 20s and everything is fine. I still have strength to help them move into new flats or whatever. Only problem I had was in primary school when collecting my son and his friend shouted to him: 'Your grandad is here'." —@Key-Interaction-6281

"I had my kids the same age you did. Mine are all still under 10. I've been called their grandmother a handful of times now, but I find it hilarious. I turn 49 later this year, and my youngest just finished kindergarten." —@Strawberrywaffles001

grandma, grandmother, mom, mother, motherhoodMood Grandma GIFGiphy

"I feel like a salmon that went upstream, spawned and is now so tired I'm happy to drift back downstream while my body decomposes. Maybe a bear will eat me if I'm lucky." —@spiteful-vengeance

"It worked out very well. He is 20 now and in college and I just retired at 65. And it’s been such a wonderful part of my life. I think my wife feels the same way." —@No-Savings7821

"38 and 42 when kids were born, 48 now, kids are 6 and 11. It's kind of heavenly. I sometimes wonder if I’m actually in heaven." —@Guitar-Nutt

"My daughter was born just in time to help us celebrate our 20th wedding anniversary. I was 40, my husband 42. Other than my husband once being mistaken for her grandfather while on a walk in Yosemite, our age was never an issue. I look younger than I am and my daughter definitely kept me active. I was the go to mom who took her and her friends to amusement parks and concerts. My husband and I took her on many vacations. By the time she was born, we were settled in our careers and financially able to provide her with experiences she wouldn’t have had when we were young. Today she is 32, happily married and thriving. We talk every day and have a great mother/daughter relationship. If I had it to do over again, I wouldn’t change a thing." —@OPMom21

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"I was 39 and 42 when my kids were born; and I'm now 66 and they are 27 and 24. We were ten years older than the other parents in our childbirth class and our baby group. But my kids went to a preschool where there were lots of older parents -- I was probably the mean age of the moms there. It was in a community (Evanston, IL, suburb of Chicago) with lots of older parents. I was more of any outlier as my kids grew older, because we tended to be older than many of the parents. I used to joke that I didn't look old I actually was old. Or sometimes people thought I was younger because of the ages of my kids. One of the other parents told me Now most of the friends I grew up with are grandparents, even though none of their kids had kids young. I have a good relationship with both of my kids -- although it was strained at times when they were teens, particularly my eldest. I work hard at getting, staying healthy so I can be around for them for a long time. My own mom died when she was 50 and I was 20, so I've already made it past that frightening point on both sides of it. I didn't want my kids to be motherless children until they were well into adulthood. I'm not sure what else you want to know. I have two nieces who both had kids when they were older than 35 in San Francisco, which, I just read has the oldest mothers in the country. They are fine about it." —@here_and_there_their

"I certainly was not ‘the old mom’ because like my peers, I got my career going first before having kids after 35 and then when my kids went to school, the other parents were also in their early 40s. We were all well educated and professional and so our kids attended a private school where younger parents would have been unusual." —@leatclowns

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"Here I am, ready to burst the "everything is amazing" bubble! ...Although I don't fit the brief 100%... I had my youngest at 34. But close enough? It's horrible compared to the kids I had in my early and mid 20s! I am healthy. I am fit and active. But there is NO comparison to how much more energy I had ~10 years ago! Please don't get me wrong! I love all of em to bits! All of them were planned and so very much wanted! But I have so much less energy, so much less patience,...like, there really are no words to describe it! The worst though, is when it comes to injuries. Since I am, and always was, very active - injuries do happen from time to time. That's just the way things go, when you're running, skiing, horse riding, biking,...,...In my 20s, that would be a sprain, some bruises or such... but now? I was out 6 weeks (!!!!) due to a stupid tumble in the snow! It wasn't even a bad fall! My body just isn't as flexible anymore, my reflexes aren't as fast anymore. I feel so sorry for my youngest, who will never meet the super active, high energy, up for anything person, that I was for my older two. I'm sorry folks, but there's a reason professional athletes mostly retire in their 30s. It's because your physical abilities start to decline. Even for professionals!" —@Alone_Lemon

"I’m 48(m) my wife too, we have 11, 7, and nearly 3 year old. We are in the thick of it with trying to raise 3 kids, prime of careers, but yet worrying about saving for retirement at exactly the same time as saving for college. Don’t have time to feel old or tired, it’s all go around this place. The mostly grey haired wrinkly face guy I catch a glimpse of sometimes reminds me of our age, but luckily I spend more time looking at my much younger looking wife than myself. She on the other hand has the raw end of the deal. :)"—@ Realist1976

passport, passport stamp, travel, traveling, international travelBorder Patrol Europe GIFGiphy

"I'm male - I was 41 when my daughter was born and 43 when my son was born. I was living in a big urban city, so 'older parents' weren't that uncommon. When I talk to younger people about having kids my advice is always the same: Have them when you are young. There is a biological reason a 25-year-old can stay up late and still get up for work in the morning. It's not for nightclubbing. It's for parenting infants & small children. By the time I was 18 my parents were in their mid-40s. They could still travel together and live life. You will feel you will never have enough money or enough time to have kids. So if you are in a relationship and want to have them, then have them." —@StoreSearcher1234

"I had a easy time when I had my daughter at 19 yrs old. Not that easy when I had 2 sons back to back at 36 and 37. Everything was harder especially recovery. I had C Sections with all and i was running around and cleaning house when I got home with daughter. With sons it took weeks to recover. But I have to say the boys got easier as they got older and I’m proud to say we all lived thru it!" —@debbiedo2019

"I do not know anyone who intentionally had kids before 35. We’re all doing great lol. However, my friends who had kids before 35 struggled with financial and relationship insecurity…" —@AdmirableCrab60

old, getting old, older, feeling old, old ageAging Season 9 GIF by FriendsGiphy

"I was 40, everyone around me has had kids about the same age so socially it’s not a big deal, but personally I feel old and tired." —@strumthebuilding

"I'm probably never going to meet my grandchildren. Other than that, things are pretty good, I still see both of my kids every week." —@blinkyknilb

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Modern Families

People discuss brutally honest reasons why so many Boomer grandparents seem to be hands-off

"They were also pretty hands off as parents, too."

Image via Canva

People offer their theories on why Boomer grandparents are more absent.

Boomer grandparents have recently come under fire by their Millennial children for how they grandparent. Many Millennials have opened up online about their parents' less-than-stellar help with grandkids and their overall absence.

In a Reddit forum discussing the differences between generations, user @No_Language_423 posed the question: "Why are so many Boomer grandparents hands-off?" They went on to add, "Genuinely curious about this. Why is it that so many Boomer grandparents seem completely uninterested in being involved or helping out with their grandkids in a real, consistent way?"

In a further explanation, they added, "From what I’ve seen and heard, a lot of Boomers actually did have active, supportive parents when they were raising their own kids. Their moms would babysit, cook, or even move nearby to help out. But now, when Millennials become parents and hope for that same kind of support, it’s like even asking is seen as too much. Some even act insulted by the idea."

old couple, grandparents, grandma, grandpa, older coupleup s GIFGiphy

However, they also noted this description of Boomer grandparents can't be generalized. They added, "Of course, there are outliers. I’m not talking about the people who comment, 'Well I help my kids all the time.' That’s great, but I’m noticing a pattern, not isolated cases. There seems to be a broader generational vibe around this. It doesn’t feel like a case-by-case thing, it feels like a shift in attitude."

They ended their post with more pondering thoughts. "At the same time, I hear a lot of Millennial parents saying they already plan to be very involved grandparents someday. So what changed? Is it a cultural shift? A difference in how retirement is viewed? Or maybe Boomers didn’t get as much help as we assume? Curious to hear what others think, especially from people who’ve experienced this dynamic firsthand."

Many people chimed in with their thoughts and firsthand experience as to why Boomer grandparents seem to be hands-off. These are 15 of the most compelling responses.

boomer, boomers, boomer grandparents, grandparents, boomer grandkidsOld Lady Reaction GIFGiphy

"The parents of boomers didn’t call their kids boomers; they called them the ME generation. Because it was all about them. They’re the ME generation." —@BEniceBAGECKA

"They were also pretty hands off as parents, too."—@ azulsonador0309

"Their moms were 23 when they had kids. Their kids were 23 when they had kids. Grandma was 46. Today’s grandmas are in their sixties. They have a hard time getting through the day without their own naps." —@Ok_Membership7264

"My theory is that it's related to people having kids later in life. The grandparents are older on average." —@nineoctopii

retire, retirement, boomer, boomers, boomer grandparentSeason 7 Showtime GIF by DexterGiphy

"It's because they had children because 'that's what's done,' not because they actually wanted them. Now that they're 'free,' they aren't going to give that up for anything. Notice how they are also distant with their own kids. It's not like they're interested in their kids, but not the grandkids. They want nothing to do with any of it." —@ExcellentCold7354

"I'm 56. Most 56 year olds these days still have full time jobs and other responsibilities to where babysitting and moving are not viable options." —@shammy_dammy

"Have you met Gen X? They were feral kids for a reason. The boomers could barely be bothered to raise their own children. They certainly aren't going to be stepping up for the grandkids." —@gwenkane404

anxious parent, millennial parent, high maintenance parenting, parent, millennial parentsMy Baby No GIF by CBeebies HQGiphy

"Millennials have also changed. Every time I offer to help, I get a scroll of instructions, gluten-free snacks, feelings charts, and nap negotiations that last longer than peace talks. Any small deviation is treated like trauma. It’s exhausting." —@Revolutionary-Buy655

"I'm a millennial with Boomer parents. My parents were pretty hands off when I was a child, so it's not surprising they were hands-off with their grandchildren. My parents dropped me off with my grandparents for weekends so frequently that I had my own bedroom there. I plan to be an involved grandparent because I value the relationship I had with my own grandparents so much. I feel sorry for the Boomers. They don't realize how much they are missing out on by focusing on themselves." —@CandidateNo2731

"They were sold the idea of retirement their entire lives. And now they feel entitled to that instead of adjusting with the times. They’re loss, historically." —@rollbackprices

parents, parenting, frustrated parents, annoyed parents, boomer parentsseason 7 kids GIFGiphy

"I think part of the answer is because a lot of them didn’t really want to have kids in the first place. But back then it’s just what you did. You got married at 20 and started popping out babies shortly after. If you didn’t, you were an abomination to the family." —@Screamcheese99

"We are older than the previous generation's grandparents. Believe it. Being 60+ and trying to care for toddlers is hard! Also, despite our experience and knowledge, we are often given ridiculous instructions and rules to follow by our own children, along with lists of likes/dislikes to adhere to. They expect entertainment in ways we are just not able to provide. Personal example from my attempt at babysitting my grandchild: I literally have not moved the car seat, that she installed, even an inch, but my DIL huffs, sighs, makes comments when getting her out of it. I am nice enough to drive her to her job to shorten their commute home, but I even do that wrong. So, forget it. I tried." —@TXteachr2018

"I think its because we live so far away from each other." —@Apprehensive_Pie_105

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"Hmm. I feel like the sense of community is gone. Starting with the Boomers in my family they emigrated to the US and scattered away from each other. States away from each other they had no support system and worked themselves ragged. There wasn’t really a village to help raise a child. Now that they are retired it’s like having a second chance at life and they don’t want to spend it watching kids. They want to pursue their hobbies and relax which I honestly don’t blame them." —@KorraNHaru

"Many Boomers (not all! so don't come for me lol) have deep, untreated trauma and mental health issues. Many are even very detached from their own existences at this point. Narcissistic traits are common among them, which is based in deep self-loathing. I think deep down a lot of them feel ashamed of how they raised their kids and don't want to mess up their grandkids as well." —@Arysta

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Family

Divorced couple's unconventional co-parenting solution hailed as 'selfless'

"Working through an amicable divorce means thinking outside the box."

Photo credit: Canva

Birdnesting is a way for couples to go their separate ways without as much disruption.

For parents going through divorce, the number one challenge is often figuring out how to not disrupt life for the kids. More and more coparenting couples are discovering that making children bounce back and forth between different living arrangements doesn’t have to be the path taken if it doesn’t actually work for the family. In fact, there are many different ways to go about it.

For Susan Fowler and her ex-husband Josh Fowler, losing their family home (and the consistency provided for their five kids) didn’t feel like an option. So, in an effort to “think outside the box,” they decided to keep the home, and simply take turns living in it.

“It was scary at first, figuring out the logistics, each finding a room to rent,” Susan explained in a TikTok clip, “But it was also way cheaper than two houses big enough for 6 people.”

@sparklysusan Working through an amicable divorce means we get to think outside the box. What really works best for our family? We realized keeping the kids in their same home is a top priority. Also, it means that we both get to keep living here part time as well, and we don’t have to lose out on all the love and effort we’ve put into this family home.
♬ Walking Around - Instrumental Version - Eldar Kedem

Rather than upsetting all five of her kids and making them go through the stress of having to pack up and go to another home every couple of days or weeks, there’s only one person who ends up leaving. And for that ease alone, Susan is "grateful" every time she hauls her bags to the car to head to the room she rents from a friend.

Plus, she writes, “we don’t have to lose out on all the love and effort we’ve put into this family home.”

Susan’s video has racked up nearly six million views, and the idea has received a ton of praise for being such a win-win—from fellow parents and former kids of divorce alike.

“This shows the level of maturity between the two parties.”

“This should be a law! Kids didn’t ask to be brought into this world. “This is exactly what should be done. Keeping kids grounded is everything!”

“I lived out of a suitcase for years because I was switching houses every week. Everything in life felt temporary. Thank you for doing this.”

“This is the most selfless way to share custody. A friend who I grew up with had 50/50 parents, said he had 2 houses and no home.

“Amazing co-parenting!! Putting the kids first!!”

“As a kid that had to take 6-hour road trips between houses, thank you for putting their comfort first.”

@sparklysusan Replying to @Emu Thompson ♬ original sound - sparklysusan


This strategy, while unconventional, is not the first of its kind, and it’s gaining traction. Many parents have found that “birdnesting” divorces, as they are commonly called, are not only practical, but protective of children’s well-being. The idea is that, like in the animal kingdom, little ones still get to have the security of a “nest” while parents take turns taking care of them.

It isn’t a fool proof plan, of course. There’s still a shifting family dynamic, which can be confusing. A ton of communication is also still required to figure out balancing responsibilities, boundaries, schedules, etc. Plus, not everyone can necessarily keep up with the financial demand of two homes.

But if both parties are aware of those factors and can work together to address them head on, the stability is likely well worth it.

As for Susan and Jason, working together doesn’t seem to be an issue. On her TikTok, she goes into detail about how they continue to meet once a week to “workout admin things for the family.” Through those meetings, they came up with a schedule where Susan lives in the family home on Mondays and Tuesdays, while Josh resides there on Wednesdays and Thursdays. Then they each alternate staying in the home from Friday to Sunday. Each of them has to arrive at the house by 10am, which is after the kids leave for school, meaning which parent stayed the night at the house also is in charge of mornings.

@sparklysusan Replying to @Samantha ♬ original sound - sparklysusan

It’s clear that they each have the same top priority: their kiddos. And it’s lovely to see parents who can keep that in mind while going their separate ways. It’s not easy, but sometimes it doesn’t have to be as hard as we think.

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