If you work in an office or will soon be required to return to one after working from home for an extended period of time, understanding office etiquette can be a challenge—especially small talk. There's no denying that making small talk with coworkers can be awkward.
But mastering the art of small talk at work isn't as hard as you think. In a Reddit forum discussing small talk in the office, workers shared their insights on how they finally cracked the code on office small talk. The biggest takeaway? It's way less complicated than you think.
Here are six tips that helped people get more comfortable and confident with small talk at work:
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"Started my first real office job seven months ago and spent the first few months completely lost on workplace social dynamics. Everyone spoke in this polite surface level way that felt fake but also seemed mandatory. After months of observation I finally figured it out: office small talk isn't about the actual content. It's about acknowledging someone's humanity in a low stakes way. That's it. 'How was your weekend?' doesn't require details. 'Pretty good, did some hiking. You?' is the perfect response. They don't actually want your whole weekend schedule, they're just being friendly. 'Busy week?' translates to 'I acknowledge you exist and seem stressed.' You can just say 'yeah it's been a lot' and that's a complete interaction. Done...Office social dynamics are way simpler than I built them up to be in my head. Be pleasant, keep it brief, move on. That's literally it. Nobody expects profound connection at the coffee machine" - JohnnyIsNearDiabetic
"The thing is, these moments and brief conversations can turn into something more , you see these folks everyday and you build on that surface level communication day after day. To be honest this has been a lot more difficult post covid wfh culture, but I highly recommend getting involved, it really makes work a lot more interesting and engaging, then eventually it just straight up enables more opportunity for yourself. Take this from someone who was really engaged in work until my role became the doldrums where I just get on with things. I think everyone needs interaction." - Skelachi
"Another great thing to do in the office is give complements about people behind their backs. Everything gets around, and you want it to be positive stuff. Obviously be genuine about the compliments tho." - Impossible_Barber538
"You just unlocked the adult version of 'don’t be annoying'. Brevity is your superpower in any low-stakes interaction." - HugeInvestigator6131
"My world view is - Repeated interactions build familiarity. Familiarity supports connections. Connections build networks. Networks is how you get stuff done. Doesn’t matter if it’s the front reception staff or the CEO. Connect in the least obnoxious way and the rest will follows." - Unkinked_Garden
"It can be a burden, but I let people complain to me, and I do my best to sympathize. You might not choose to do that, but mostly people like to complain, if they feel comfortable enough after the initial inane chatter. Just keep that in mind - you might want to avoid it. In fact it’s probably smart to avoid it, but I let people bend my ear. It’s ok." - joeykey
@coffeewithsimonHow to initiate small talk and keep a convo going. Work edition. #careeradvice #careertiktok #worktips #smalltalk #communication #communicationskills
How to make small talk with coworkers, according to experts
Dr. Jonathan Thorp, CEO at Quantum Connections—a program that equips leaders and employees with the dialogue skills needed to foster connection, collaboration, and inclusion—tells Upworthy that small talk is the "micro-connection" that keeps workplaces human.
"Psychological safety, appreciation, and empowerment are the real drivers of connection," says Thorp. "Small talk is where those things start, through curiosity, listening, and genuine interest. It is the social handshake before collaboration begins."
Looking for more ways to get better at small talk? Here are six more quick tips for mastering small talk with coworkers:
Use obvious opening lines
"It's easier if you talk about something you both see at this moment or just did. For example, you can ask, 'How was that meeting?' or 'Have you tried the new coffee?'" Jan Hendrik von Ahlen, managing director of JobLeads, tells Upworthy. "Something safe, easy, and without high pressure. Good topic ideas include the current workday, some light weekend plans, the weather on that day, or the commute. Skip things like money, health, or politics."
Lead with curiosity
"Ask before you tell," says Thorp. "Curiosity builds safety and shows you value the other person’s perspective. A simple 'How is your day going so far?' can open the door to trust."
Ask specific light questions
"Instead of simply asking, 'How are you?' try asking, 'What was one good thing from your weekend?' or something along this line," says Hendrik von Ahlen. "Repeat a detail: 'Oh, you're fixing a bike? What kind?' Be interested and curious about what they are saying. Specifics start real chats, but remember to avoid anything too personal."
@thatcareercoachReplying to @runesblade Small talk 101 - get to know your coworkers #corporate #work #careeradvice #careercoach
Mirror and acknowledge
"Repeat or reflect what you heard to show attention: 'Sounds like you have a busy week ahead.' These small signals of recognition strengthen connection more than any topic itself," says Thorp.
Share a little about you and invite others to do so
"Another tip is to offer one light or fun fact about yourself," shares Hendrik von Ahlen. "For example: 'I started doing 10-minute walks at lunch and it really helps.' Then you can ask them, 'Have you got any quick reset tricks like that?' Sharing something lighthearted like this makes you seem more human without any kind of oversharing. But keep it positive: don't vent about co-workers or private work."
Keep it real, not scripted
"Authenticity beats performance," adds Thorp. "People can sense when you are running on autopilot. Be present, not perfect, and treat small talk as a practice in empathy rather than etiquette."
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