Anxious mom-to-be asked what parents 'love about having children' and the responses were beautiful
Twitter users agree that parenting is more joy than work.
The thought of having children can be overwhelming for a lot of people. People who have kids often warn those without them that their kid is going to take over their entire life. They complain that children are extremely expensive and that you’ll never get a good night’s sleep until the child has turned 4.
Now, I have a 5-year-old and the only thing that’s really true is that children cost a lot of money. A big chunk of the cash you spend on a kid is for food. Mine never stops eating. He eats as much as I do and I’m a 45-year-old man.
I hear him say, “Dad, I’m hungry. Can I have some food?” at least six times a day.
I also don’t think that children take over your entire life unless you let them. It’s a sliding scale. When they’re a newborn, they own 90% of your life and you only have the remaining 10%. But, by the time they’re 5, you get about half your life back. While that still seems pretty sad, it’s not a huge problem. Having kids teaches you to be a lot better at time management and to take advantage of free time when it’s available.
When it comes to sleep, smart parents sleep train their kids at a young age so that everyone in the family can get a good night’s rest. It’s not easy, but it pays huge dividends.
Rose Stokes, an award-winning freelance columnist in London, recently learned that she is pregnant and was very anxious about having a kid because of all the things she’s heard from people with kids. So she took to Twitter to ask parents to tell her what they “love about having children” to give her a more positive perspective.
Without wanting to undermine the struggles of parenthood, which I know are huge, I'm getting a bit anxious with lots of people telling me how hard and difficult being a mother will be. As an antidote: parents of Twitter, what big or small things do you love about having children?— Rose Stokes (@Rose Stokes) 1641548612
Stokes received a ton of incredibly positive responses from people who truly love having children. They eased her mind by telling her that she would experience the greatest love of her life after having children. They told her that being a parent is one of the funniest experiences she’ll ever have.
The parents of Twitter also made an important point: Children make you a better person. I always think about parenting as a stress test on your personality. If you want to know what’s wrong with you, have a kid. You’ll quickly figure out all of your weaknesses. The good thing is that once we know our weaknesses we can fix them.
Here are some of the best responses to Stoke's question: “Parents of Twitter, what big or small things do you love about having children?”
It's hard to describe what it's like to have a child.
I think the reason it seems like parenthood is all bad is it’s easy to describe the bad parts and impossible to describe the good parts because they are so good they are other-worldly.
— Lucy Huber (@clhubes) January 7, 2022
Mother love. The moment you hold your baby and this new emotion sweeps over you, you are changed forever. You won't believe it until it happens. Your kids make you feel pure joy, happiness, rage and sadness. And they will make you laugh.
— Justabaker #hearmeroar (@Justabaker17) January 7, 2022
There are a lot of joyous moments.
So many things. Waking up with their arms wrapped around me, constant cuddles. Saying “I love you” every time we leave a room. Hearing their worries and mad, made-up stories about imaginary fox families; silly kitchen discos every weekend, eating dinner together with “fake wine”
— Victoria Richards (@nakedvix) January 7, 2022
To me… being a mother is a lot more like being crazy, head-over-heels in love than anything else. It’s visceral, too - I crave their skin, physical touch; can’t get enough of their hair and breath and laughter. When you love someone so much you could peel them and eat them? That
— Victoria Richards (@nakedvix) January 7, 2022
Children change your perspective.
My daughter is two, and her favourite film is my favourite film - Singin’ In The Rain. Watching her watch it has given me a whole new appreciation for it, and she’s shown me new jokes I hadn’t noticed which are obvious to her
— Greg Jenner (@greg_jenner) January 7, 2022
It's hard but worthwhile.
It maybe the hardest job in the world but it’s also the best and most meaningful. What I can promise you is that it gets better and better. Mine are now 9,10 and 14 and I wish I could stop the clock right here. Not pure joy. But many moments of it.
— Isabel Oakeshott (@IsabelOakeshott) January 7, 2022
My ride to here hasn’t been at all easy. But we’ve found our groove now & have done for quite a while. Chaz will be six in April & has become very funny. He’s also very sensitive & I love that he’s a sponge for knowledge which in my case is biased towards flowers!You’ll rock it x pic.twitter.com/Snt3Wj2liy
— Sophie Rumble #JohnsonOut (@sophiearumble) January 7, 2022
It's not as hard as people say.
I found that none of this was the case. The 19 months I\u2019ve had with my son have not been easy of course but they have contained so much joy and adventure and laughter. Seeing the world anew with him, having cuddles and watching him learn are such beautiful things.— Isabel Hardman (@Isabel Hardman) 1641552763
They make you a better person.
People don't tell you that you will find your kids hilarious. That they will add structure and balance to your life. They will improve your time management and make you a more empathetic and forgiving human.
— Laura Durcan (@Rheum2improve) January 7, 2022
Watching them see the world in an entirely new way. It makes you see it in new ways, too. Everything is new again, every day.
— Heather Cox Richardson (TDPR) (@HC_Richardson) January 8, 2022
They're fun and funny.
Children are funny, even babies, and if you don't take everything so seriously, you can have so much fun watching them grow.
— Polly Karr (@karr_pe) January 7, 2022
For every stomach churning, eye-bag making, heart-aching hardship of the first few years, there’s moments of pure wide-eyed magic from the most basic and hackneyed places, and you get to feel it too. They’re also comedy gold without any intention or effort. pic.twitter.com/JmaQOleVm9
— Chris Duffy (@vonduffer) January 7, 2022
They are so funny - Finn makes me laugh every single day. Also watching how they grow and develop is fascinating. The way they think and the connections they make - plus how they absorb everything around them. Yes parenthood is tough, but it is brilliant. Xx
— Ruth Davidson (@RuthDavidsonPC) January 7, 2022
The great thing about asking a wide swath of humanity about a common experience is that you get so many great perspectives on the matter. Some parents shared the emotional experiences that come with having children. While others focused on how kids can fundamentally change your life. After reading through most of the responses, I think that Stokes probably got a clear idea about what having a child is like.
Well done, Twitter.
- How to talk to your mixed-race kids about race. - Upworthy ›
- A mom describes her tween son's brain. It's a must-read for all parents. ›
- The coolest scientist in America has some terrific advice for parents ... ›
Our mouths loves chips. Our bodies not so much.Photo by 
You can eat well without giving up sweets completely.Photo by 
12 non-threatening leadership strategies for women
We mustn't hurt a man's feelings.
Men and the feels.
Note: This an excerpt is from Sarah Cooper's book, How to Be Successful Without Hurting Men's Feelings.
In this fast-paced business world, female leaders need to make sure they're not perceived as pushy, aggressive, or competent.
One way to do that is to alter your leadership style to account for the fragile male ego.
Should men accept powerful women and not feel threatened by them? Yes. Is that asking too much?
IS IT?
Sorry, I didn't mean to get aggressive there. Anyhoo, here are twelve non-threatening leadership strategies for women.
Encourage.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When setting a deadline, ask your coworker what he thinks of doing something, instead of just asking him to get it done. This makes him feel less like you're telling him what to do and more like you care about his opinions.
Sharing ideas.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When sharing your ideas, overconfidence is a killer. You don't want your male coworkers to think you're getting all uppity. Instead, downplay your ideas as just "thinking out loud," "throwing something out there," or sharing something "dumb," "random," or "crazy."
Email requests.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Pepper your emails with exclamation marks and emojis so you don't come across as too clear or direct. Your lack of efficient communication will make you seem more approachable.
Idea sharing.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
If a male coworker steals your idea in a meeting, thank him for it. Give him kudos for how he explained your idea so clearly. And let's face it, no one might've ever heard it if he hadn't repeated it.
Sexism.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When you hear a sexist comment, the awkward laugh is key. Practice your awkward laugh at home, with your friends and family, and in the mirror. Make sure you sound truly delighted even as your soul is dying inside.
Mansplain.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Men love explaining things. But when he's explaining something and you already know that, it might be tempting to say, "I already know that." Instead, have him explain it to you over and over again. It will make him feel useful and will give you some time to think about how to avoid him in the future.
Mistakes.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Pointing out a mistake is always risky so it's important to always apologize for noticing the mistake and then make sure that no one thinks you're too sure about it. People will appreciate your "hey what do I know?!" sensibilities.
Promotions.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Asking your manager for a promotion could make you seem power- hungry, opportunistic, and transparent. Instead, ask a male coworker to vouch for you. Have your coworker tell your manager you'd be great for the role even though you don't really want it. This will make you more likely to actually get that promotion.
Rude.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Sometimes not everyone is properly introduced at the start of a meeting. Don't take it personally even if it happens to you all the time, and certainly don't stop the meeting from moving forward to introduce yourself. Sending a quick note afterward is the best way to introduce yourself without seeming too self-important.
Interruptions.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When you get interrupted, you might be tempted to just continue talking or even ask if you can finish what you were saying. This is treacherous territory. Instead, simply stop talking. The path of least resistance is silence.
Collaboration.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When collaborating with a man, type using only one finger. Skill and speed are very off-putting.
Disagreements.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When all else fails, wear a mustache so everyone sees you as more man-like. This will cancel out any need to change your leadership style. In fact, you may even get a quick promotion!
In conclusion...
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Many women have discovered the secret power of non-threatening leadership. We call it a "secret power" because no one else actually knows about it. We keep our power hidden within ourselves so that it doesn't frighten and intimidate others. That's what makes us the true unsung heroes of the corporate world.
About the Author: Sarah Cooper
Sarah Cooper is a writer, comedian, and author of 100 Tricks to Appear Smart in Meetings. Her new book, How to Be Successful Without Hurting Men's Feelings, is out now.
The comedic book cover.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
A satirical take on what it's like to be a woman in the workplace, Cooper draws from her experience as a former executive in the world of tech (she's a former Googler and Yahooer). You can get the book here.
This article was originally published on March 25, 2019.