+
Identity

Let's all take a pause before commenting on someone's weight, fictional character or not

Disney's short about a ballerina's triumph revealed an undercurrent of cruelty about obesity that needs to end.

obesity, weight, body image
Mark Production/Canva

People with obesity should be able to express joy and confidence without shame and criticism.

Folks, we need to talk.

Last week, I wrote an article about Disney’s new short, “Reflect,” which had been creating some buzz. The 2 1/2 minute film about a larger-than-average ballerina who triumphs over the mirror by dancing with joy and confidence is an ode to the body image struggle so many people face. It’s sweet, positive and inspiring.

But many people’s reactions to the film—or even just the idea of the film—were not.


Commentary has been mixed, as is often the case, but I’ve been stunned by the casual cruelty people throw around when it comes to weight. I’ve been writing on the internet for a long time and am fairly immune to trollish comments, but these comments feel different. These aren't trolls being outrageous to get a reaction; these are people voicing their genuine prejudices.

I’m a thin person and found it disheartening, but when I put myself into the shoes of an overweight/obese/larger-than-average person, the comments came off as utterly crushing.

First, there were a lot of sarcastic “Oh great, let’s glorify/celebrate obesity,” comments. Nothing in this film celebrated obesity. The only things being celebrated were the joy of expression through dance and a young woman finding she had power over her own insecurities. Celebrating those things through a large-bodied character is not glorifying obesity; it’s merely showing that people who don't fit the standard mold can express themselves joyfully and don’t have to be held back by insecurity. Those are objectively good messages.

Second, there were a surprising number of “fat people are just lazy” comments. Um, this film is literally depicting a fat person exercising. Like, she's dancing the whole time. The opposite of lazy. What more do people want?

Third, “We should focus on teaching kids to eat right and exercise instead of trying to make people feel good about being fat." Hmm. Helping people feel confident in their bodies, whatever shape or size they are, is not the same as making people "feel good about being fat." The logical corollary here is "people should feel bad about themselves if they are above a certain [totally arbitrary] size or weight or shape," which is ridiculous. Shame is counterproductive. More on that in a moment.

But in terms of education about eating well, how about we walk and chew gum at the same time? How about we encourage healthy living and make sure people know their worth isn't wrapped up in their weight? How about we recognize that there are plenty of thin people who eat crappy food and don’t exercise much and that weight is not always an indicator that someone doesn't eat well?

There are actually a lot of ands that we all need to internalize when it comes to bodies and fat. Obesity in general is associated with health problems and not all weight issues are due to not eating right or exercising enough and thin people can be just as unhealthy as obese people and fat people deserve support and compassion (or at least just be allowed to "be") and someone else's body size really is nobody else's business to comment on.

"But it's a character! It's not even a real person!" It doesn't matter.

Commenting critically or cruelly on a fictional character's body primarily does two things:

1) It reinforces common biases and stigmas surrounding people who are overweight, which is dangerous. Harvard University has shared research showing that bias against obesity can cause doctors to assume a patient's symptoms are due to weight and prevent them from investigating further, which can lead to missed diagnoses. Additionally, many doctors are not well-trained in what causes obesity or how to treat it, so patients who are overweight can be impacted by both bias and a lack of knowledge and understanding about their bodies.

(Side note: Obesity is not as simple as "calories in/calories out"—that's an antiquated myth according to Harvard obesity expert Dr. Fatima Cody Stanford. What you eat matters, of course, but it's just one piece of a large, multifaceted puzzle.)

2) It actually discourages people from losing weight. Cruelty is discouraging and judgments are demotivating. That's not just a guess—research backs that up. And real people who see themselves in the character you are mocking or criticizing will see themselves in your comment. If you genuinely care about other people's health and want to do something about obesity as a health issue, making gross assumptions and mean comments about fat people is 100% NOT the way to address it. It's counterproductive.

"But obesity is unhealthy!"So is negativity—literally. But negativity comes with the side effect of bringing down everyone else around you, which can impact their health as well, so which is worse?

Every obese person has surely heard it all before, so critical comments aren't telling them anything they don't already know. It's not kind, it's not helpful and it does far more harm than good.

Joy and confidence, on the other hand, are motivating. When people feel good about themselves, they are more likely to be successful in whatever endeavors they undertake, whether their goal is to create healthful habits or perfect a tricky dance move.

That's what makes the message of "Reflect" so powerful. And that's why complaints about a character with obesity being portrayed in a positive light completely miss the point. We all deserve the freedom to express ourselves with joy and confidence, no matter what shape or size body we are in.

A Korean mother and her son

A recently posted story on Reddit shows a mother confidently standing up for her family after being bullied by a teacher for her culture. Reddit user Flowergardens0 posted the story to the AITA forum, where people ask whether they are wrong in a specific situation.

Over 5,600 people commented on the story, and an overwhelming majority thought the mother was right. Here’s what went down:

“I (34F) have a (5M) son who attends preschool. A few hours after I picked him up from school today, I got a phone call from his teacher,” Flowergardens0 wrote. “She made absolutely no effort to sound kind when she, in an extremely rude and annoyed tone, told me to stop packing my son such ‘disgusting and inappropriate’ lunches."

Keep ReadingShow less

It's incredible what a double-sided magnet can do.


A new trend in treasure hunting called magnet fishing has blown up over the past two years, evidenced by an explosion of YouTube channels covering the hobby. Magnet fishing is a pretty simple activity. Hobbyists attach high-powered magnets to strong ropes, drop them into waterways and see what they attract.

The hobby has caught the attention of law enforcement and government agencies because urban waterways are a popular place for criminals to drop weapons and stolen items after committing a crime. In 2019, a magnet fisherman in Michigan pulled up an antique World War I mortar grenade and the bomb squad had to be called out to investigate.


Keep ReadingShow less
Pop Culture

Woman was mocked online for calling an $80 purse a 'luxury item.' Her response went viral.

"I'm so grateful that my dad was able to get me one. He worked so hard for that money.”

@zohtaco/TikTok

Zoe Gabriel, showing off her new purse from Charles & Keith

Insults of any kind are painful, but jabs towards someone’s financial status are their own breed.

In January 2023, Singapore-based Zoe Gabriel was on the receiving end of this particular flavor of mockery when she posted a TikTok about a purse from local retail brand Charles & Keith—a gift bought for her by her father.

In her excitement, the 17-year-old called the bag, which costs around $80, a “luxury” item as she unwrapped it. Her excitement was sadly cut short by some of the negative comments she received.

One comment seemed to stand out above the rest and prompted Gabriel to post an emotional response video.

Keep ReadingShow less

Ring doorbell video captures what it's like to be the default parent.

Kids, man. I'm not sure of the scientific way audacity is distributed, but kids have a lot of it and somehow make it cute. That audacity overload is especially interesting when you're the default parent—you know, the parent kids go to for literally everything as if there's not another fully capable adult in the house. Chances are if your children haven't sought you out while you were taking a shower so you could open up a pack of fruit snacks, then you're not the default parental unit.

One parent captured exactly what it's like to be the default parent and shared it to TikTok, where the video has over 4 million views. Toniann Marchese went on a quick grocery run and *gasp* did not inform her children. Don't you fret, they're modern kids who know how to use modern means to get much-needed answers when mom is nowhere to be found. They went outside and rang the doorbell.

Back when we were children, this would've done nothing but make the dogs bark, but for Marchese's kids, who are 3 and 6 years old, it's as good as a phone call.

Keep ReadingShow less
Pop Culture

'American Idol' contestant has perfect response to Katy Perry's 'mom-shaming' joke

The 25-year-old used the moment to stand up for moms everywhere.

@sarabethliebe/TikTok

"Keep loving your babies."

You might recall us singing the praises of Sara Beth, the exuberant young mom with major vocal chops dubbed the “Accidental American Idol.”

During Sara Beth’s initial audition for the show, judge Katy Perry made a joke that rubbed many viewers the wrong way.

Before Sara Beth even began to sing, the 25-year-old revealed that she had three children, which prompted Katy Perry to dramatically stand up from her seat and feign shock. When Sara Beth, all smiles, said, “If Katy lays on the table, I think I’m going to pass out,” Perry retorted, “Honey, you’ve been laying on the table too much.”

Keep ReadingShow less

YouTube creator Steve Mould shows us what echo looks like through an acoustic camera.

It’s bizarre to think about seeing sound, but nowadays we can do just that. If you haven’t seen an acoustic camera before, that’s because they’re mainly used for industrial purposes, but they’ve been available commercially from gfai tech since 2001.

YouTuber Steve Mould, who has a science channel with over 2.1 million subscribers, took the complicated concept of the acoustic camera and made it easy to understand in his latest video, “Acoustic cameras can SEE sound.”

In the video, Mould explains how an acoustic camera is much like your smartphone's video recorder. But it also creates visual representations of sound emanating from where it’s generated within the video.

Keep ReadingShow less