Americans share the top 13 things foreigners should avoid when visiting the U.S.

Sorry, but you can’t drive from New York to LA.

america, american tourists, national parks
An ambulance, a Waffle House and an angry bison.Photo credit: via RDNE Stock project/Pexels, Neal Wellons/Flickr and Karolina Wv/Pexels

While the United States is undeniably one of the most culturally dominant countries in the world, its depth and complexity go far beyond what most people understand before seeing it for themselves.

The U.S. is a melting pot of diverse cultures, histories and landscapes, creating a rich and complex national tapestry that takes time and travel to truly comprehend. Heck, even Americans ourselves have a hard time understanding each other from time to time.

It’s a place where every state can feel like its own little world, each with its own traditions, accents and cuisines. So, it’s understandable that when many people from around the world visit for the first time, there are some things they probably wished they had known ahead of time.


To help people better understand America’s unique quirks, a Reddit user named AlainasBoyfriend asked the online forum, “What should a foreigner avoid while visiting the United States?” While it’s reasonable to assume the comments would be about avoiding dangerous neighborhoods or tourist traps, the conversation was a lot more positive. It was centered around the vastness of the U.S. geography and the regional differences that people from another country may not expect.

The big takeaway is that America is a huge place where our states can be as different as most countries. Any place with regions as diverse as Hawaii, Oklahoma, Alaska and New York will be hard for most people to grasp on the first visit.

Here are the 13 things foreigners should “avoid” when visiting the U.S.

1. Watch for wildlife

“If you go to the national parks, don’t attempt to take selfies with the wildlife. A full grown bison will throw you through the air like a crumpled piece of paper.” — Juergen2993

“I want to really emphasize this. There are US Park Rangers who are full-time employees of the National Park Service. Their job is to protect the park, the wildlife, and visitors. Take the posted signs seriously and listen and do what rangers advise. Yearly, a dozen or so people die in the Grand Canyon National Park, often tourists who go hiking without enough water or food and are not aware of how treacherous the terrain and weather can be. Same for Big Bend NP in Texas.” — aaby-rose

2. Don’t underestimate the ‘rural-ness’

“If you are visiting a more rural area, like Montana where I live, don’t underestimate the rural-ness. You might not be able to get a hotel in a small town and there are plenty of places where there aren’t any hotels or accommodations. You can take the highway and run out of gas because there aren’t any gas stations for 70 miles. Also, if it is a dirt road, and there are a lot of them in the rural U.S., don’t ever assume that you will have cell/GPS reception or that the dirt road goes anywhere besides 50 miles into the mountains where you can get stuck or break down.” — Violet624

3. America is huge

“The flight from London to New York is only about an hour longer than the flight from New York to Seattle.” — UnspecificGravity

“And we don’t have any kind of sensible train infrastructure connecting cities.” — NobodyCool1234

4. You can’t drive from NY to LA

“We had an exchange student from France staying with us (NY). One day, we saw her with a map of the US, said she was going to take a bus to California because she had heard so much about it on television. We had to sit down and explain it was going to take a week, each way.” — MedicinalTequila

“Lol I have some German friends who flew into Texas and wanted to make a day trip to Los Angeles during the week they were in the US. After that first trip, they planned much better and now visit the country by regions and give themselves more time.” — MarbleousMel

5. Give us space

“I find a lot of foreigners have about 2 1/2 inches of a personal space bubble, while us Americans value our space. Keep at least a 2-3 feet distance when conversing with strangers. I’ve had an Italian guy come so close I thought he was going to kiss me. Very uncomfortable for someone who isn’t used to a lack of personal space.” — MasterPip

6. Forget the stereotypes

“Leave all your stereotypes about America home, it’s a hugely diverse country and your experience in one part of the US will be very different to your experience in another. Keep an open mind and have fun.” — Zerbey

“But.. Murica!!! Seriously I try to get this across to people. The United States is not one place. Or even 50 places. It’s huge and a cultural melting pot like no other. There is absolutely no way to stereotype ‘America.’ Remember guys, Hawaii, Florida, New York, Alaska and Oklahoma, etc, are vastly different places. And they’re all their own unique thing, different from the next state over.” — BlueIsBlackbird

7. Don’t travel with pot

“Taking weed across state lines. It’s not legal everywhere.” — Gromit801

8. Avoid the chains

“Don’t go to the big chain-type places. Go to the mom-and-pop little restaurants and coffee shops and specialty shops. You will usually find new cool things you enjoy.” — Election Proper8172

“To add to this: FOOD TRUCKS!!!” — OpeusPopeus

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9. Avoid sensitive topics

“When visiting the U.S., it’s best to avoid discussing sensitive topics like politics and religion with strangers, even if they bring it up.” — Vexina1997

“I’m a huge fan of Bill Burr’s catch-all non-committal response: ‘Hey, fair enough!’ You just say, ‘Hey, fair enough’ to any baiting comment.” — Heretic Jones

10. Be sure to tip

“Generally, you should tip at sit-down restaurants with full service (ie waiter comes and takes your order, brings food, refills drinks and clears your dishes). At these places, traditionally the minimum is 15%, but most people I know tip closer to 20% standard.” — Heliawe

11. Don’t get the large

“Ordering a large at a restaurant, or especially a movie theater. I don’t care how hungry you think you are, you will not eat/drink it all in one sitting.” — Amazing_Excuse_3860

12. Buy travel insurance

“Medical travel insurance that goes into the 7 digits. Someone from my country had the misfortune of having a stroke in the USA. 150k+ in expenses. When I went there it was my number 1 concern: getting insurance.” — N0t_N1k3L

“Underrated comment. You can run, but hospital debt might find you unable to return. Use a fake name. Get a fake name and a story ready now. You do not speak English nor any modern language. When discharged, run. This also applies if you have health insurance.” — univ06

“Avoid a hospital visit. Whatever you think it costs, it’s more.” — pug_fugly_moe

13. Be careful around police

“Don’t interact with the police unless you absolutely need to.” — Snackdoc189

“If you didn’t call them, don’t talk to them, at all.” — Shastadakota

“Yeah they’re honestly not there to help you, and some will be annoyed if you ask for so much as directions.” — Honestnt

  • Texan who moved to the UK shares 3 ‘mortifying’ experiences that almost made her want to leave
    A woman in a cowboy hat and a woman in a phone booth in the UK. Photo credit: Canva

    If you’re looking to move abroad from the United States, the United Kingdom seems like a natural candidate on its face. After all, moving to the UK means you’ll already speak the language, be relatively familiar with the country’s political structure, and exist within a similar pop culture and media ecosystem.

    But many people who move to London or its surrounding areas are stunned to learn just how different American and British cultures can be.

    Ashley Jackson recently moved from Amarillo, Texas, to South Manchester. She’s been documenting her journey acclimating to the new culture on her TikTok channel. Recently, she shared three “mortifying” experiences that almost made her rethink her new life in the UK.

    texas, london, uk, america, americans, living abroad, UK culture, american culture, cultural differences
    London at night. Photo credit: barnyz/Flickr

    In the tongue-in-cheek post, she reiterates that despite the difficulties and hilarious flops that have arisen from her new life, she’s still having a great time living in Manchester. But things were certainly touch-and-go for a while at first.

    “One, I’ve had a full-on conversation with a person and I didn’t understand a lick of it. She had a very different accent I couldn’t understand,” Jackson says.

    Accents and regional dialects in the UK are among the most diverse and wide-ranging in the world. In the U.S., there are subtle differences between Southern, Cajun, and Northeastern accents, for example. But that’s nothing compared to what even locals encounter in the UK. Even they sometimes have a hard time understanding more niche or obscure dialects like Glaswegian or Devonian. Most Americans are woefully unprepared for the accents they encounter there.

    Issue number two for Jackson? “It hailstoned. While on a hike up a hill, it rained, hailstone, my daughter was crying. Everyone was wet, soggy, feet muddy. Quite traumatizing for all of us, but we’re still here.”

    Weather in the UK can be all over the map, but one thing the region is famous for is rain and hail. Heatwaves and climate change have only contributed to hailstones becoming larger and more frequent. In another video, Jackson says acclimating to the weather in the UK has been a challenge, noting that she had to “toughen up.”

    And finally, issue number three: “I was cut off by my GP (general practitioner) after the 10-minute mark. I didn’t realize there were 10-minute time slots for doctor’s appointments. Learned that one the hard way.”

    One big appeal of living in the UK is the mostly free healthcare provided through the NHS. However, appointments can be hard to come by, and many doctors are strict about keeping visits under 10 minutes so they can manage their patient load. Jackson was stunned to be “cut off” in the middle of a visit, but for locals, that’s just the way it goes.

    Americans moving to the UK often experience extreme culture shock. We sometimes expect the cultures to be so similar that the small differences that do exist catch us completely off guard.

    The language, though fundamentally similar, can take Americans a while to pick up on. British culture is full of slang, regional dialects, and colloquialisms that can be confusing for outsiders. One American who moved there, for example, was baffled when everyone kept calling her cookies “biscuits.”

    A lot of American daily conveniences either don’t exist in the UK or are far more rare. Air conditioning and garbage disposals, for example, are hard to come by. Houses and living quarters in general are much smaller than what most Americans are used to as well.

    Work culture is very different in the UK as well. Citizens usually have a stronger work-life balance and a government-mandated minimum of five weeks of paid vacation.

    In short, moving from America to the UK won’t necessarily be easy just because of the common language. Whether you ultimately enjoy American or British culture more is a matter of taste, but it will take some getting used to—that’s for sure.

    As for Jackson, she says in her videos that even if the adjustment wasn’t easy, she loves the rain, the NHS, and the walkability of life in the UK. She just had to stick it out through a few embarrassing faux pas before she could start enjoying all the perks.

  • 15 things tourists notice in the U.S. that Americans totally miss
    A family poses in front of a home with an American flag.Photo credit: Canva
    , ,

    15 things tourists notice in the U.S. that Americans totally miss

    “I’ve lived in the US my whole life. Somehow, I’ve never noticed this before.”

    Tourists see new places with fresh eyes and fresh observations. In 2024, 72.4 million tourists visited the United States, according to the National Travel and Tourism Office. (That’s a lot of eyes seeing America in a new light.)

    Tourists to the States have pointed out that Americans really do like to put ranch dressing on everything. They’ve also noted that in the U.S., squirrels seem to run rampant.

    While these are insightful observations, most Americans would say they already know them to be true. On Reddit, Americans shared the shocking realizations they had about the U.S. that were only revealed to them by tourists.

    As one American noted, “I’ve lived in the US my whole life. Somehow, I’ve never noticed this before.”

    These are 15 eye-opening things tourists brought to Americans’ attention that truly blew their minds:

    Culture

    “We sure do have a lot of flags everywhere.” – myfourmoons

    “American coins don’t have numbers on them.  Some of the coins will say ‘One Cent’ or ‘Quarter Dollar’ but I don’t think that’s helpful if your English is not so good. And sometimes that labeling is just not in a place that easy to see on a coin.” – chocotacogato

    Michael White, a former spokesman for the United States Mint, told The Gainesville Sun that the reason coins in the U.S. don’t have numbers is simple: “It is an artistic choice in the majority of instances.”

    White added that certain coins in the past in the U.S. have used numerical notations, including the dime, nickel, and quarter. The article notes, “From 1809 to 1836, there was a half dollar imprinted with ’50 C.’ That was changed to ’50 cents’ for two years and then, in 1838, artistic choice deemed it should be called ‘half dollar.’”

    “The gap around the stall doors in public restrooms. It’s weird, and I hate it.” – SidheRa

    “So. Many. Insurance. Commercials.” – Reddit_Talent_Coach

    “Bank drive-thru lanes. I was told ‘why don’t you just get out of your car and walk in the bank?’” – JWilsn_Art

    According to Wells Fargo, “motor banks” (aka drive-in and drive-thru banks) were invented in the U.S. and came into existence in the 1930s.

    “That every morning, all American children from kindergarten to 12th grade, stand before the US flag (found in every classroom, ofc) and recite “the pledge of allegiance” to the country in unison, with their right hands over their hearts. Upon learning this universal American school experience, my Russian colleague said: ‘That is the most Comm*nist thing over ever heard!’” – jzzdancer2

    The Pledge of Allegiance, written by Francis Bellamy, debuted in 1892, according to the American Legion. Over the years, it went through various edits until it was recognized by Congress and included in the U.S. Flag Code on June 22, 1942.

    “How much daily life revolves around cars. In many cities, if you don’t drive, you basically don’t exist. It’s convenience on steroids.” – Prior_Bank7992

    Mannerisms

    “That Americans switch between hands when eating with silverware, cutlery, etc.” – BasilRevolutionary38

    Called the “cut-and-switch” table habit, it’s described by NPR as when you “hold your fork in your left hand and cut with your right and then put down your knife so you can switch your fork to your right hand before you take a bite.”

    Americans actually adapted this use of cutlery from the French. Writer Mark Vanhoenacker explained to NPR, “Americans got it from France in the 19th century even as France was giving it up, and no one knows why France gave it up. Maybe just convenience or another change of fashion.”

    “We smile too much. To the point where foreigners, specifically Asians (Korean and Chinese) have pointed out that our smiles feel disingenuous and mean nothing. Really hit home, but despite that, I still smile ‘too much’.” – BMdabbleU

    “How much casual socializing we do with strangers. From small talk to things people in other places consider weirdly intimate (like talking about health problems).” – Practical-Water-9209

    “The lean! The fact that people from the U.S. tend to lean on things while standing, no matter how inappropriate a place or circumstance. I’ve thought about it, and I think its because the U.S. (for the most part) isn’t walkable, so we aren’t used to standing for as along as other countries.” – Lobstertales143

    The Central Intelligence Agency has deemed the “American Lean” a dead giveaway that someone is an American. In 2019, Jonna Mendez, the CIA’s former chief of disguise, and Gina Haspel, former CIA director, told NPR that Europeans can easily spot Americans in a crowd.

    “They think that we are slouchy, a little sloppy,” Mendez said. “And they think that they can almost see that in our demeanor on the street because they stand up straight. They don’t lean on things.”

    Food

    “Root beer tastes like medicine. It’s still my favorite soda but… yeah it tastes mediciney.” – TheNerdNugget

    “Had a German foreign exchange student and she said ‘All American breakfast is dessert. Pancakes, donuts, Cinnabon, muffins, French toast…’ I was like yea you have a point lol.” – dom954

    Words

    “Apparently Americans use the word ‘awesome’ a lot. I’ve had people in other countries tease us for how we think everything is awesome lol. But to be fair, tons of things ARE awesome, and also you’re talking to me on vacation when I’m in the best mood of my life lol.” – Gold_Telephone_7192

    “‘Yeah’ ‘Yeah no’ ‘Yeah right’ ‘Oh yeah’ ‘Hell yeah!’ All mean different things!” – zippy_97

  • Non-Americans share the 13 dead giveaways a tourist is American
    A group of Americans looking at a map. Photo credit: via SoStark/Flickr
    ,

    Non-Americans share the 13 dead giveaways a tourist is American

    “Americans recognize other Americans in most countries because they smile at strangers on the street.”

    It’s wonderful to go on vacation and learn all about other people’s cultures. But when you travel to another country, you also learn a lot about your own. When you’re a fish out of water, it’s easy to see the ways you stand out in a foreign environment. It’s especially noticeable when you’re an American, because your culture is known around the world.

    A big way Americans stand out overseas is through their fashion. Wearing a New York Yankees cap, cargo shorts, and white New Balance sneakers may be camouflage in America, but in Paris, you stick out like peanut butter on a baguette.

    americans, american tourists, americans aborad, americans on holiday, tourists,
    Americans looking at a map. Photo credit: tAlex Bikes/Flickr

    To reveal the many ways Americans stand out while traveling, a Reddit user asked non-Americans a simple question: “Besides their accent, what’s one way you know a tourist is American?” The post received over 18,000 responses. Evidently, there are a lot of ways to spot an American abroad.

    Here are 13 of the best responses:

    1. They wait to be seated

    “When visiting Paris, my wife and I learned they don’t seat you at restaurants. You just walk in and sit down at an available table. We figured it out after standing around at the entrance a few times. Then we started noticing other American tourists doing the same.”

    2. They start conversations with everyone

    “Saying ‘hi, how are you?’ to the barista, servers, retail workers. My country doesn’t quite have that culture so I find it really sweet.”

    “I’m fascinated with Norway and remember watching a vlog from an American who had moved there. She said one of the biggest differences was the lack of politeness, because people view it as fake. I would love to live somewhere that’s more introverted than the US.”

    “The absolute fearlessness of asking anyone on the street about anything.”

    “This is something i still don’t understand after being in Europe for a few years. Why are people so afraid of other people just like them?”

    “I’ll literally talk to anyone that wants to chat me up, never thought that was uniquely American.”

    americans, american tourists, americans aborad, americans on holiday, tourists,
    Americans filming on a city street. Photo credit: Joseph Tame/Flickr

    3. The smile is a dead giveaway

    “When I went to Italy with a friend, I couldn’t figure out why everyone greeted me in English before I said a word. I don’t wear running shoes outside of the gym, I dress pretty posh, I can’t remember the last time I owned a baseball cap, and I try to have a basic grasp on the local language. How can they tell I’m American? My friend told me, ‘it’s because you’re smiling at them.’”

    “It’s not so much about the fact that Americans smile, it’s how you smile. Nobody here smiles with their teeth. Maybe if they heard a really funny joke or are trying to look happy in a picture, but that’s about it. When I visited America, my family literally spent hours trying to learn how to properly smile with all your teeth showing. I still can’t do it correctly, it looks weird. I remember the first times I saw pictures from a highschool yearbook on the internet. I thought, ‘What is wrong with them? Why are they smiling so much?’ If you smile with your teeth at someone in Europe, it’s either your job, or you’re American.”

    “Americans recognize other Americans in most countries because they smile at strangers on the street.”

    “I live in New York, I don’t understand this smiling thing.”

    Why do Americans smile so much? It’s because they come from a diverse country. A study of 32 different countries found that emotional expressiveness is correlated with diversity. When people are around others from diverse cultures, they are more likely to use a smile to build trust and cooperation.

    4. Americans are very polite

    “Some of yous are way more polite than expected. Whenever I hear someone say ‘ma’am’ I know they’re American. Like one time I was in Lidls and there was an American family asking someone who worked there if they sold ‘cell phones’ and when the woman said they didn’t they were all ‘oh okay, thank you for your time ma’am! Have a great day!’ which is mucb more cheery than the average Scot.”

    “Yes, sir, that’s southern manners.”

    “I’m gonna piggyback the Midwest in here, too. If you just walk away without putting something like this in Kansas, you might as well have slapped them.”

    americans, american tourists, americans aborad, americans on holiday, tourists,
    American tourists. Photo credit: Canva

    5. Americans are friendly

    “Most American tourists I’ve come across are really friendly and talkative. They always seem to be genuinely stoked to be here haha.”

    “Let’s put it this way: in the Eurozone, you can make a day trip of going to another country. For most of the US, getting to literally any other country is a massive ordeal with a huge price tag, so when we get to go, it’s a really special occasion that we have to make the most of because a lot of us have no idea when or if we’ll ever get to do it again.”

    6. They are amazed by old things

    “Girlfriend used to work on a farm and an estate in the U.K. and would often have Americans in awe of the old buildings. One once said ‘some of these buildings are older than my country.’”

    “Reminds me of that old saw ‘Americans think a hundred years is a long time, Europeans think a hundred miles is a long way.’”

    7. They need to find a trash can

    “If you see an American in Japan, they will frantically look for public trash cans. The absence of trash receptacles is something unfounded in the US, and we become confused at the idea of having to hold it for extended periods of time.”

    “EXACTLY!! Im American, went last year and i ended up having half of my backpack filled with trash until i found a trashcan, it didnt help it was mid summer so we would buy drinks from vending machines a lot, not all the vending machines had trashcans.”

    americans, american tourists, americans aborad, americans on holiday, tourists,
    An urban dumpster. Photo credit: Canva

    8. They won’t stop tipping

    “Tipping. Americans will try to tip everyone, even in countries where tipping isn’t a thing/is considered a serious insult.”

    “True. I used to work in a bar in the UK, and American customers would insist on tipping me even after I declined. The relief on their faces when I took the money was hilarious.”

    9. They shop late at night

    “They’re looking for a store open at like 11 pm. Even if in most European countries stores close at like 7-8 pm.”

    “Yeah, I’m italian but live in the US right now. One of my coworkers went to Italy on vacation and she was texting me stuff like ‘there’s no circle k here?’ Lmao.”

    10. Just look at their feet

    “Americans will be wearing sneakers.”

    “Yep. I walked into a museum in Germany, and the woman selling tickets greeted us in English. We were dressed conservatively, and hadn’t said a word, yet she knew. I asked her how, and she said, ‘It’s your shoes.’ Indeed, I was wearing running shoes.”

    Although there is no specific reason why Americans tend to wear sneakers more often than people in other countries, a major factor is car culture. When you don’t walk much, you value comfort and style over everything else. Plus, America is a country based on individuality, which breeds a culture that’s more casual than in other developed countries.

    11. They take off their shoes in the airport

    “I hear that us Americans can easily be spotted in the airport by the fact usually were use to taking off our shoes in TSA.”

    “Dude when we landed in Japan a couple of years ago I started to take my shoes off to go through customs and I’ll never forget, one of the agents there just completely froze and looked at me like I had frogs coming out of my ears. He then motioned for me to put my shoes back on. I was very embarrassed.”

    12. It’s how Americans dress

    “Baseball caps, University spirit wear, cargo shorts, free t-shirts from events with ads and text all over them, and for the older Americans, they always seem to just kinda stand in the middle of everything looking around.”

    “People may mock Americans for wearing shirts with ads on them but Europeans and their soccer (ahem, football) gear is just as questionable.”

    “As opposed to football jerseys with ads prominently featured on the design that the wearer paid good money for.”

    “For the longest time, I thought that there was a soccer team named Fly Emirates.”

    americans, american tourists, americans aborad, americans on holiday, tourists,
    A peanut butter sandwich. Photo credit: Canva

    13. They’re looking for peanut butter

    “If they buy peanutbutter. It sounds very weird, but everyone who buys peanut butter where I work, turns out to be American.”

    “I was desperately homesick while living in Belfast and had a quiet cry in the grocery store because I wanted it and couldn’t find it. I eventually did, made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, and felt better. Not seeing the sun for three months was doing my head in.”

    Interestingly, although Americans are stereotyped as the biggest consumers of peanut butter in the world, it’s actually much more popular in developing nations such as Burkina Faso, Myanmar, and Chad, where it is used as a nutritional supplement and an ingredient in soups and stews.

  • A linguist from Alabama explains the surprising origin story of the Southern word ‘y’all’
    The history of the word "y'all."Photo credit: Wikimedia Commons

    Head anywhere in the Southern United States, and you are likely to hear one distinct word: “y’all.” “Y’all,” which combines the words “you” and “all,” may be predominantly used in the South—but not for long.

    Paul E. Reed, a linguist at the University of Alabama who studies Southern American English and Appalachian English, told NPR in 2025 that “it’s expanded much more outside of the South” thanks to Americans under 40. (Add it to the list of Gen Z slang.)

    How “y’all” entered the English vernacular is a fascinating tale. Linguist Danny Hieber, PhD, explained the origin story of “y’all” to his TikTok followers—and it stems from a surprising language.

    @linguisticdiscovery

    What do all y’all think about “y’all”? @Landon If you enjoyed this video, you’ll love the Linguistic Discovery newsletter! Deep dives into how language works, language profiles, explainers of terms/concepts in linguistics, reviews, and more! LinguisticDiscovery.com/newsletter (Also available on Substack or Patreon.) #yall #yalldve #South #Southern #English #dialects #grammar #pronouns #linguistics #language#French#LingTok#LearnOnTikTok

    ♬ original sound – Linguistic Discovery – Danny Hieber, PhD

    A linguist explains the ‘y’all’ backstory

    According to Hieber, present-day English doesn’t have a plural form of the word “you” like other languages. In Old English, there were three forms of “you”:

    • Thou (subject)
    • Thee (object)
    • Thine (possessive)

    Hieber goes on to explain that “you” became singular thanks to French. In French, “you” translated to:

    • Tu (singular)
    • Vous (plural + polite)

    “After the Norman Conquest of England in 1066, French had a huge influence on English,” he said. “So English speakers started borrowing that pattern into English and used ‘you’ to politely address one person.”

    He added that over time, this became the default way to address a single person. Along those same lines, the word “be” also followed suit.

    “It used to be that the verb ‘be’ was conjugated like this,” explained Hieber, with the plural use becoming “are.” “That singular verb got pulled along into the singular too, and now the conjugation of ‘be’ looks like this:”

    • I am / we are
    • Thou art / you are
    • He, she, it is / they are

    However, it created a “gap,” and “English speakers have been trying to settle on a ‘you [plural]’ ever since,” said Hieber. Enter: y’all.

    @genteelandbard

    Where and how did the word “Y’all” begin in the southern United States? #genteelandbard #savannah #storytime #historytok #southerncharm

    ♬ Natural Emotions – Muspace Lofi

    The history of ‘y’all’ in the South

    There are many theories as to how y’all infiltrated American English in the 1700s, per NPR. One theory states that it has British origins, where the words “ye” and “aw” were combined and used in the British Isles. From there, Scots-Irish immigrants brought it to Appalachia in the U.S.

    The other theory is that it originated in West Africa, and when enslaved people were brought from there to the South, it began to spread. After the Great Migration, Black Americans brought the term north with them, expanding its use.

    However, the term “you guys” is still commonly used in most Northern states. There are also many regional variations throughout the country, including “yinz” (used in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania) and “youse” (used in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania).

    Americans respond

    Viewers had lots of opinions on Hieber’s video, including how different regions have termed the plural form of “you”—and their thoughts on y’all:

    “Sorry… y’all is singular all y’all is plural.”

    “In the upper Ohio Valley, we also say things like, ‘All yinz guys,’ a sort of amalgamation of Pittsburgh’s ‘yinz’ (we’re an hour away), and the Midwest ‘you guys.’”

    “From CA but living in the south..I just cannot bring myself to say y’all..feels so unnatural.”

    “Washington born and y’all made it into my vocab.”

  • Kobe Bryant explains why failure ‘doesn’t exist’ and to stop fearing it
    Kobe Bryant talks about failure.Photo credit: MykChiz/YouTube

    NBA legend Kobe Bryant was one of the greatest competitors of his generation, and his work ethic was distilled into a single phrase: Mamba Mentality.

    “You wake up every single day to get better today than you were yesterday,” Bryant said in an interview posted on Twitter (X) in 2020. “Doesn’t matter what you are—basketball player, hockey player, golf player, painter, writer… doesn’t matter.”

    It was about dedication to the process, not just the results, and about obsessively preparing and outworking everyone else in the building.

    Bryant described one way he placed process above everything else in a 2015 interview with Jemele Hill during BET’s Genius Talks. She asked Bryant, “How did you become one of those people who doesn’t seem to be afraid of failing?” Bryant flipped the question on its head.

    Bryant didn’t believe in failure

    “Seriously, what does failure mean? It doesn’t exist. It’s a figment of your imagination. What does it mean? I’m serious. I’m trying to think. How can I explain it?” he responded.

    He tried to explain the concept of failure through the opposite idea—perpetual success—which he also didn’t believe exists:

    “So let’s use happy endings then we can relate this to failure, why it’s not existent. Everybody talks about how everybody wants a happy ending, right? Now, let’s go through the reality of it. Let’s look at a fairy tale story. It’s like Snow White. She gets a happy ending. She finds a prince or whatever, she goes along, she lives happily ever after. Well, I call bulls**t on that because two months later, the fact is they had an argument and he’s sleeping on the couch. Right? So the point is, the story continues. … So if you fail on Monday, the only way it’s a failure on Monday is if you decide to not progress from that, right?”

    kobe bryant, bryant 24, mamba mentality, basketball, lakers
    Kobe Bryant. Photo credit: Keith Allison/WikimediaCommons

    Bryant added, “So to me, that’s why failure’s not existent. Because, you know, if I fail today, okay, I’m going to learn something from that failure, and I’m going to try again on Tuesday. I’m going to try again on Wednesday.”

    Later in the interview, he extended this belief across disciplines, noting that even if he never achieved his ultimate dreams on the basketball court, he would take the lessons he learned there and apply them to his next endeavor—for example, business.

    Kobe Bryant at a charity event. Photo credit: Neon Tommy/Wikimedia Commons

    “But, if I don’t take that stuff and apply that someplace else, then that’s failing, which to me is the worst possible thing you could ever have is to stop and to not learn,” Bryant said. 

    The Mamba Mentality has a life of its own

    Bryant’s thoughts on success and failure mirror the oft-repeated wisdom that it’s not the destination but the journey that truly matters. Sure, you’re going to win some games and lose others, but the most important thing is constant improvement, no matter the arena. That’s the Mamba Mentality. Although Bryant may have left us, his drive lives on in everyone he inspired to be their absolute best.

  • ‘To see within’: How the Icelandic concept ‘InnSæi’ can help you make better decisions
    A woman looks out over the crashing water. Photo credit: Canva
    ,

    ‘To see within’: How the Icelandic concept ‘InnSæi’ can help you make better decisions

    InnSæi (pronounced “in-sy-ay”) is an Icelandic philosophical framework for understanding and cultivating intuition.

    Have you ever been in a meeting where something appeared…off, but you couldn’t explain why? That subtle feeling is the Icelandic concept of intuition known as InnSæi (pronounced “in-sy-ay”).

    While many of us dismiss gut feelings as “woo woo,” neuroscience is beginning to prove otherwise. Research from institutions like the Max Planck Institute for Human Development shows that our intuition is very real. Researchers report that intuition results from our unconscious mind processing information much faster than our rational brain. Your body senses subtle clues and patterns you don’t consciously notice, communicating through hunches and that feeling of “just knowing.”

    In our hyperconnected world, we’ve grown distant from this inner wisdom. Notifications ping, feeds scroll endlessly, and information floods in from every direction, taking us far away from InnSæi.

    To do so, it’s worth asking: what if you could reconnect with this lost sense? What if you could tap into this hidden intelligence to make better decisions, lower stress, and handle life’s uncertainties with more confidence?

    This brings us to InnSæi. Let’s explore what it means, why it’s more relevant than ever, and how you can begin cultivating it today.

    The true meaning of InnSæi

    The word InnSæi combines two Icelandic roots: Inn (meaning “inside” or “inward”) and ‌Sæi (to see, also evoking “sær,” meaning “sea”). This beautiful, poetic compound reflects three connected aspects of intuition.

    curiosity, psychology, styles, mental, health
    A person sits in front of the ocean with their back to the camera. Photo credit: Canva

    The sea within

    This refers to the ongoing activity of your unconscious mind: a place of imagination, vision, and quick pattern recognition that works below conscious awareness. Neuroscientist Joel Pearson describes intuition as “the learned, productive use of unconscious information.” Your mind is constantly active, continually connecting ideas, like a steady, ever-moving current. Research shows that our brains begin processing decisions up to seven seconds before we are consciously aware of them.

    To see within

    Self-awareness, also known as metacognition, is like a mirror for your mind, allowing you to clearly observe your thoughts, feelings, and reactions. It helps you differentiate genuine intuition from fears, biases, or wishful thinking that can obscure judgment. Studies show that developing metacognitive skills improves emotional control and boosts decision-making. By turning your focus inward, you can block out the noise and pay attention to what truly matters in your inner world.

    To see from the outside

    This dimension represents an inner compass, or the natural competence to steer life’s uncertainties with inspired confidence. It focuses less on strict rules and more on staying true to your authentic values and deeper intuition. This compass provides clarity, focus, and fortitude, guiding you through the most chaotic times.

    Why intuition is more important than ever

    We live in an era of constant information overload. Today, an average person consumes more data in a single day than someone in the 15th century did in a lifetime. Our attention has become a limited resource, continuously pulled by content algorithms, 24-hour news cycles, and endless virtual distractions.

    curiosity, psychology, styles, mental, health
    Three children play with a tablet. Photo credit: Canva

    This nonstop flow of information can drown out your intuition. It creates a disconnect from your body, your internal signals, and the indicators that could guide you toward the right path. As Icelandic author and intuition expert Hrund Gunnsteinsdóttir notes, “We’ve outsourced our inner expertise.”

    Intuition embodies more than just a desirable trait; it is a key part of innovation, creativity, and effective leadership. A 2017 study found that Nobel laureates see intuition as a key factor in their revolutionary findings. Similarly, business leaders often credit their most successful decisions, especially in uncertain or urgent situations, to their gut instincts.

    Intuition is like a muscle—you can strengthen it through practice.

    Four ways to cultivate your InnSæi

    1. Connect with your gut (5-15 minutes)

    Your body holds subconscious knowledge. When something feels wrong, you might notice tension in your stomach, tightness in your chest, or a sense of unease. These bodily signals often happen before you become consciously aware of the issue.

    Try this: Take a few slow, deep breaths. Put one hand on your stomach and notice its movement with each inhale and exhale. Ask yourself what you are sensing—warmth, tension, calm, or unease. Name these feelings silently or out loud. Notice any changes as you breathe and pay attention to what your body is telling you. Do this daily to make the signals more familiar.

    Ask yourself simple, honest questions: How am I feeling today? Is this decision aligned with who I am right now? Notice whether your stomach feels at ease or tense.

    With regular practice, your body’s internal signals grow clearer.

    2. Keep a daily journal (5-15 minutes)

    Stream-of-consciousness journaling is a profoundly effective way to gain mental clarity. Letting thoughts drift freely onto paper without editing or restraint creates mental space. Research shows that handwriting improves clarity and memory more than typing.

    curiosity, psychology, styles, mental, health
    Someone writes in their journal. Photo credit: Canva

    Try this: Set a timer for 5 to 15 minutes and write without stopping. Do not analyze, censor, or judge what you write—just keep the pen moving. If you hit a blank, write “I don’t know what to write” repeatedly until another thought appears. Afterward, briefly review what you wrote and make a note of any emotions or physical sensations you notice.

    Over time, you’ll begin to observe patterns: recurring fears, internal critical voices that aren’t yours, or repetitive thought loops. Building this awareness helps you distinguish between true intuition and mental chatter. As you write, pay attention to your body. Observe physical reactions to your ideas.

    3. Be mindful of what captures your attention

    Your focus is the gateway to intuition. It shapes your inner world and your perception of reality. Yet, we rarely notice what captures our attention during the day.

    Try this: Carry a small notebook throughout your day. When something captures your attention—a phrase, a color, or a strong emotion—immediately write it down, noting the time and place. Keep this up for a week.

    curiosity, psychology, styles, mental, health
    A woman writes in her journal. Photo credit: Canva

    At the end of the week, review your notebook. Select 10 words or phrases that stand out most. Write these in a vertical list on a new page. Spend two minutes simply observing the list—do not analyze. Notice if feelings, ideas, or connections come to mind. Write down any motifs or impressions that arise.

    Paying close attention to your focus uncovers the underlying influences shaping you. This can function as a strong catalyst for creativity.

    4. Cultivate flow (60 minutes)

    Flow is the magical state where you forget about time and self, fully immersed in what you’re doing. Research shows that in states of flow, the brain decreases activity in executive control regions and increases activity in sensory areas, creating space for intuitive insights to surface.

    curiosity, psychology, styles, mental, health
    A woman in a black dress holds a scarf in the wind. Photo credit: Canva

    Try this: Select a task that is meaningful but slightly challenging for you. Set a timer for 60 minutes. Remove all potential distractions (phone, notifications), and consider playing only instrumental music. Focus on the task without stopping to judge or edit. Afterward, take three minutes to note how you felt and any thoughts that came to you during the session.

    Gunnsteinsdóttir used this technique when developing a strategy for her work on InnSæi. She downloaded a template, set a timer, and let her vision flow onto the page. “I didn’t stop to think about what I was writing; I simply allowed what emerged to flow,” she explains. After 60 minutes, she read what she had written and made only minor tweaks.

    After your flow session, reflect in your journal: Did you lose sense of time? What would you do differently next time? Did this state help you access your inner compass?

    Charting your way forward

    In tough times, a strong InnSæi is vital. Trusted intuition anchors you and yields richer guidance.

    Begin with one small new practice: spend five minutes on intentional breathing each morning, or write a journal entry at night thinking about how your body felt that day. Keep a notebook for tracking observations that catch your attention. Schedule one 60-minute flow session each week. Track your progress in your journal and review it weekly to notice changes or patterns.

    curiosity, psychology, styles, mental, health
    A person in a white t-shirt and colorful hat sits in front of the water with their back to the camera. Photo credit: Canva

    With practice, your inner signals grow clearer. Observation becomes sharper, decisions more confident, and you handle uncertainty with ease. Your ever-present intuition is a steady guide. Will you make space to listen?

    Begin now—your inner compass is prepared to guide you.

  • A man at a bar bought a rude stranger a drink and used it as a brilliant lesson about consent
    An uncomfortable woman is approached by a man at a barPhoto credit: Canva

    The situation was familiar enough to be exhausting. A man at a bar had bought a woman a drink. She didn’t want to go home with him. He apparently felt those two things were in conflict.

    “You are not going to come home with me?” he said, audibly frustrated. When she said no, he pushed back: “But I bought you a drink.” She got up and walked away.

    A TikTok user who goes by @tripptokk10 was standing nearby when this happened, already at the bar ordering his own drink. He watched the woman leave, looked at the man still standing there working through his grievance, and made a decision. He ordered two shots.

    “I slide it over to him,” he explained in his TikTok video, posted December 20, 2025. They took the shots together. Then he leaned in and made his point: “So are you going to come home with me or what?”

    The logic was the same. The conclusion was absurd. That was exactly the point.

    In the video, filmed casually at home in a robe and bonnet, he explained what he was responding to: “This one’s for the boys who think buying a woman a drink at the bar means that she should go home with you. No, it doesn’t. She doesn’t know you.”

    A man stares at a woman at a bar.
    A man stares at a woman at a bar. Photo Credit: Canva

    The same creator posted a second video about another night, different bar, same basic dynamic. This time a man had approached one of his female friends, put his hands on her shoulders without asking, and kept going despite her visibly trying to shrug him off. When she tried to walk away, he reached for her hand. The TikTok user stepped in and told him to back off.

    What happened next is the part that stayed with people. The man started apologizing, directing the apology not at the woman he’d been grabbing, but at the guy who’d intervened. “You didn’t do anything to me,” the creator told him. “You were harassing her.”

    The man’s response: “I respect you so much.”

    He described how confused and frustrated he felt in that moment. “Go apologize to her and change your behavior,” he said in the video, “because an apology without changed behavior is just a manipulation tactic.”

    That line hit harder than the shot glass moment for a lot of viewers. The dynamic he was describing, where a man harms a woman and then seeks absolution from another man rather than the person he actually hurt, is one that gets talked about in academic gender studies literature but rarely gets explained so plainly in a 60-second video in a bathrobe.

    Neither incident is complicated. Nobody got arrested, nobody threw a punch, nobody did anything that required a news alert. What spread was simpler than that: one person noticed something wrong, said something proportionate, and kept his head on straight when the whole thing got weird. Apparently that’s still worth talking about.

    This article originally appeared earlier this year.

  • How to live more productively by understanding your distinct ‘time personality’
    A person planning with a calendar (left) and a person running late (right).Photo credit: Canva

    It’s true that we all have the same 24 hours in a day. But it’s our own personal relationship to those 24 hours that greatly determines what that day looks like.

    Time is one of those things that is both a constant in our collective reality, and yet highly subjective to the individual. It’s why one person hears “We need to be there 6:30” and translates that to “We need to be out the door in fifteen minutes,” and another person translates it as “Oh, I have plenty of time to change my clothes, walk the dogs, listen to a podcast, and clean out that junk drawer!” And of course, these two individuals will be spouses. It is universal law. 

    It would seem that—much like how knowing whether you’re an introvert, extrovert, or somewhere in between can help you navigate social settings—knowing your MO when it comes to time management can really help make your day flow a lot smoother. 

    That’s where the four “time personalities” come in. 

    In an article for Verywell Mind, experts Kristin Anderson, LCSW, and Dr. Ryan Sultan, explained that most of us fall somewhere on a spectrum between “very rigid” and “very flexible.” There are, of course, various factors that dictate why we might fall into a certain spot—including neurodiversity, age, and other aspects of our overall personality. But regardless, knowing the gifts and challenges of our go-to time management settings can greatly affect how we “function.”

    See which one below seems to resonate the most. 

    The 4 Time Personalities

    1. The Time Optimist

      The never-ending mantra, or perhaps the “famous last words,” of this personality is “I’ve got plenty of time!” regardless of what the clock says.

      Because of this, Sultan says time optimists “don’t really feel pressure under a time crunch.” They truly believe they can fit multiple tasks into a short amount of time and don’t easily account for potential delays, which leads to chronic tardiness. 

      “They’re ones who leave for a dinner reservation with just enough time to get there, as long as there’s no traffic and they hit every green light,” said Sultan. 

      Folks who consider themselves time optimists might benefit from exploring the “double it rule,” which has you automatically double the amount of time you think it’ll take to get somewhere or complete a task. 

      2. Time Anxious

      Unlike time optimists, “time anxious” personalities feel an enormous amount of pressure, assuming “everything that can go wrong, will go wrong (e.g., traffic, delays, getting lost on the way).” Therefore, they attempt to ease this tension by showing up to things incredibly early. 

      Dealing with time anxiety involves many of the same tools to handle everyday anxiety, such as grounding techniques (5-4-3-2-1 technique, deep breathing), cognitive restructuring (challenging perfectionism, setting realistic goals), and structured planning (using calendars/apps, setting “worry time”). These strategies help shift focus from the future to the present, reducing the fear of wasted time. And maybe, just maybe, the time anxious can experiment with being fashionably late to low-pressure situations. 

      3. Time Bender

      For time benders, the whole concept of time is merely subjective. Where time optimists overestimate what they can accomplish within a certain amount of time, time benders create entirely different time rules for themselves. “Being 10 minutes late basically counts as on time,” Anderson uses as an example. 

      These are the curious, creative souls who thrive under pressure and easily lose track of time when they reach a flow state, or bounce from inspiring task to inspiring task.

      To help curb time-bending tendencies, a good option could be the “Pomodoro Technique,” which has you working in focused, 25-minute bursts followed by short breaks to maintain high energy and concentration. 

      “Time blindness” might sound very close to “time optimism” and “time bending,” but the former is associated with an actual inability to perceive the passage of time. That’s why Anderson and Sultan explained that this category is frequently found in those with ADHD or executive function issues.  

      4. Time Blind

      “It’s not that these folks don’t care about being late or making other people wait,” said Anderson. “Without external reminders or cues, it’s easy for them to lose track of how long things take, which makes sticking to a schedule more challenging.”

      Sultan added, “Their brains actually have a difficult time registering and processing temporal information, causing impairments in working memory, executive functioning, and temporal discounting.” 

      Though time blindness might be more deeply ingrained than the other three personalities, there are several proven tools that can help—from simple, tried-and-true methods like visual/audio timers (think hourglasses and analog clocks) to apps designed to help strengthen time estimation. And of course, these tools aren’t exclusively beneficial to those with bona fide time blindness. Optimists and benders can try them out as well. 

      Once you better understand how you uniquely navigate time, you’re better able to (a) incorporate strategies that help you work within your limitations and (b) give yourself a little grace. Perhaps that last part is most important.

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