upworthy

presidential race

One afternoon, my 8-year-old son came home from school and informed me that Hillary Clinton is going to ban cheeseburgers.

At least, that's what a kid at school told him. He wanted to know if it was true.

I know I'm not the only parent who's found talking to their kids about this election a little bit more "challenging" than anticipated. I presume that you, like me, are probably ready for this election to be over.


After the whole Hillary-banning-delicious-cow-sandwiches incident, I decided to let my son watch the beginning of the first debate with me so he could hear what Clinton really thinks. Unsurprisingly, Donald Trump made a bit of a bigger impression on him and didn't exactly set a shining example of what being presidential looks like. Trump spent the last hour of the debate attacking his opponent's health and threatening to say "really tough things" about her, which meant he was gonna say mean things about her husband (who isn't running for president right now).

She sat through three debates with him. That takes stamina. GIF via CBS News.

I worried what Trump would do to kick it up a notch in the second debate and what kind of example this was setting for my son and daughter.

Then some news broke about an old tape of Trump and a bus and Billy Bush and bragging about doing not OK things to women, and it was announced that those comments would be addressed in the first question at the second debate. I didn't feel confident that the conversation that ensued would handle the topic of consent responsibly.

Regretfully, I told my son he couldn't watch the second debate with me...

No. No it's not. GIF via NBC News.

...which turned out to be the right call.

It seems weird that I'd have to shield my children from what should be a very informative example of our democracy in action. Yet there I was, doing just that. The problem is, like many parents, I really want my kids to learn about the democratic process.

So what's a parent to do?

Here are six not horrifying conversations I had with my kids about democracy this election season. I hope you find them useful and/or adorable.

1. On fact-checking:

When your kid's primary source of gossip is other kids, it's important to make yourself accessible to answering any questions they might have. Here, something clearly got lost in translation on the playground.

8yo: Daddy, is it true Hillary Clinton is gonna ban cheeseburgers?
Me: Where did you hear that?
8yo: At school, Teddy said she was gonna ban all cheeseburgers and candy and guns and stuff.
Me: Ah, no. She’s not going to ban any of those things. She does want to fix the rules to make buying guns safer for everyone.  Teddy is confused.
8yo: Then why did Teddy say she was going to?
Me: Well, sometimes people get incorrect information. If you ever want to know if something's true, just ask me, we can look it up together.
8yo: Fine, can I punch you in the stomach now?
Me: No, that's only for before dinner.






For the record, a good punch in the stomach has provided me more thoughtful introspection than watching the debates.

You'll see on Election Day, Trump. SPOILER: It's not. GIF via CBS News.

2. On temperament:

As if it isn't hard enough teaching your kids about appropriate and inappropriate behavior, doing it while one presidential candidate is demonstrating all of the "don't" behavior is even harder.

4yo: Daddy, why is Donald Trump yelling at Hillary?
Me: Well, some people aren’t good at controlling their tempers and listening. You know how when you are upset, sometimes I have to get you to calm down before we talk?
4yo: Yeah?
Me: Well, Donald Trump isn’t good at calming down or listening. He wants to boss people around and make them do what he wants, even if it isn’t a good choice.
4yo: He should calm down and listen more.
Me: Yeah, he’s just not very good at that.




On the other hand, Trump has been a delightful role model of how not to behave, and my 4-year-old could really use that right now, what with how she responds to criticism like he does. 4-year-olds: Earth's adorable defensive irrational narcissists.  

Trump doing his best toddler impression.

3. On building walls:

Honestly, I'm starting to think my 8-year-old would've been a great debate moderator. He asks the obvious questions that a 70-year-old belligerent uninformed presidential candidate refuses to think about or answer.

8yo: Daddy, why does Donald Trump keep talking about a huge wall? Wouldn’t he have to build it into space? Otherwise people could climb or fly over it.
Me: Um … OK. Yeah, making a bigger wall is silly. But the more important thing to ask is why it’s there? Do you know what immigrants are?
8yo: They’re people who come to live here from other countries.
Me: Correct. So some of those immigrants come here from other countries like Mexico. And sometimes they come here without permission because they need to make money to send home to their families or want to feel safer than they did in their country or it's sometimes hard to find work where they live. And Donald Trump says that they want to come here to hurt people and steal things.
8yo: Do they?
Me: Nope. They actually pay $11 billion into the economy each year, and then they can’t use any of the stuff that they pay for because then they’d get in trouble.
8yo: What’s the economy?
Me: Um…






We'll talk about the economy when he's older. But at least he's thinking things through logistically, unlike some people we know.

Former Mexican President Vicente Fox explains a big hole in Trump's wall plan. (The current president of Mexico later seconded that motion.) GIF via Fusion.

4. On campaign ads:

I don't know about you, but here in Colorado, the commercials that run when we watch the nightly news lately have been not what I would call "family friendly."

If you believe the local attack ads, my congresswoman wants to protect child predators (she doesn't). Also apparently there's a ballot measure that will pressure people to end their life if they are terminally ill, even if they don't want to (it won't).

Neither of those things are true, but try explaining that to a kid.

8yo: Daddy, is this commercial talking about how Hillary is bad?
Me: Yes, but here's the thing: Never believe anything you see in commercials.
8yo: Why?
Me: Well, the folks who make political commercials like to only tell one side of the story and sometimes don't tell you what you really need to know.
8yo: Even Hillary commercials?
Me: Yes. They're probably telling stories a little better than Trump commercials, but they still will skip over important details. If you see it on a commercial, you should probably google it too and get the whole story.
[Commercial comes on about how my Democratic congresswoman is super stoked to let all the child murderers out of jail.]
Me (loudly, to drown out audio): HEY, KIDS! WHAT DID YOU DO AT SCHOOL TODAY, I WAS JUST WONDERING! WAS IT SUPER FUN?! DID YOU STEAL A CAR OR LIGHT THE BUILDING ON FIRE?! (Continues this charade for 30 seconds until awful ad goes away.)
Kids: DADDY, WHY DO YOU KEEP YELLING AT US?! USE YOUR INDOOR VOICE! WE DON'T STEAL!







Make the horrible stop! GIF from "Friends."

Obviously, the smart choice here is to just turn off the news until 2017, but where's the fun in that? Either way, my kids just learned a great lesson in doing their own research. And I learned that they don't steal or set things on fire. Maybe I am actually OK at this parenting thing?

5. On breaking glass ceilings and good role models:

This conversation just gave me all the feels. I don't know how my daughter was aware of the gender of all our previous presidents (although she does love the musical "Hamilton"). But she did the math. And then asked this:

4yo: Daddy, Hillary will be the first girl president?
Me: Yup.
4yo: I want a girl president for once. It’s about time. Also, Donald Trump keeps yelling and being mean.
Me: Yeah, he’s been making some bad choices lately.
4yo: Can you talk to him, please?
Me: Um….




I could try talking to him, but he doesn't seem to listen. Maybe he needs a time-out? GIF via NBC News.

She thinks politics are boring and is adamant that she won't run for president herself one day. I can't decide if I'm relieved about that or not.

6. On voting:

The most clutch part of being a citizen is the whole voting thing. So I sat down with my kids and went through the ballot section by section. (We have mail-in balloting in Colorado, which is so much more convenient). We have like 473,023 things on the ballot, including nine state ballot issues, a ton of judges, and 22 different presidential candidates. I walked the kids through the major initiatives, and then we got to president.

Me: OK. So for president, should I vote for Jim Hedges from the Prohibition Party?
Kids: WHO IS THAT?! NO!
Me: OK, what about Roque De La Fuente from the American Delta Party?
Kids: NOOOOO!
Me: What about Ron Silva from the Nutrition Party?
Kids: NOOOOO!
Me: What about Donald Trump?
Kids: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO! He's MEAN!
Me: So Hillary Clinton, then?
Kids: YES!!
Me: Why?
4yo: Because she's a girl!
Me: Do you have a better reason?
4yo: She's cute! And I want a girl president!
8yo: She's not cute! She's a grandma!
Me: Have any better reasons?
8yo: I just want her because you want her. I don't really know enough stuff about what she believes and stuff.
Me: That, sir, is an astute observation. When you get to vote for president, I hope you learn all the stuff first. Don't take my word for it.
8yo: OK, can I go play now?

















Full disclosure here: I have no idea if I'm doing any of this right.

Kids are impressionable. I don't want to turn them into little robots who spout talking points from political parties on the playground. I want them to be exposed to lots of different ideas. But I'd prefer if their beliefs come from an empathetic place that considers the greater good for all (I'm zany like that). Which is why I believe Trump is a poor choice for me personally. I'm planning on sending a clear goodbye message to him this year with my vote.

This is a metaphor for the message I hope all Americans send to Donald Trump on election day. GIF via Time/YouTube.

Obviously, like all parents, I'm making this up as I go. What about you? How have you handled it? Let me know. And please vote. That way we won't spend four years having to explain horrifying things to our children about topics they will have plenty of time to learn about when they are at the actual appropriate age to actually talk about them.

I'm gonna go let my kid punch me in the stomach now instead of reading what Trump said today on Twitter. If you were looking for something to do, this nonpartisan site will tell you where and how to vote. Please? And while you're at it, ask your friends how they handle these conversations.

That President Barack Obama, he sure knows how to give a speech.

Photo by Robyn Beck/AFP/Getty Images.


So it's no surprise that on July 27, 2016, the house was packed as the 44th U.S. president addressed the nation at the Democratic National Convention in Philadelphia.

Photo by Robyn Beck/AFP/Getty Images.

He was there to stump for his former rival and secretary of state, Hillary Clinton, of course.

Photo by Aaron P. Bernstein/Getty Images.

But his speech was about so much more than that.

While Obama certainly had a few digs for candidate Donald Trump up his sleeve and made sure to tout the high points of his own time in the White House, he also had some inspiring stuff to say about the power of creating our own America through the ballot box — regardless if we vote red or blue.

1. Obama pointed out that we have to care about democracy 365 days a year — not just one Tuesday in November.

"If you want more justice in the justice system, then we’ve all got to vote — not just for a president, but for mayors and sheriffs and state’s attorneys and state legislators," the president explained.

2. He made sure to note it's totally fine if you don't always agree with everything a candidate is saying. In fact, that's actually sort of the point.

What you shouldn't do, the president implored, is abstain from the voting process because you don't see your views fully represented. The only way to make change is to get involved yourself.

3. The president reminded listeners that tomorrow isn't something to be afraid of — it's something we create with our actions.

That's kind of what makes America so great.

4. Obama also acknowledged change can't happen without a lot of hard work from the ground up from people like you and me.

One of the great things about the internet is that it's made getting involved with politics easier than ever. While Obama was talking specifically about the DNC's own organizing arm, it's never been more clear that the future of politics and political organizing lies with the younger generations of people who are just getting involved for the first time.

5. He ensured us that, even when times get tough, real change is within reach if we work hard enough.

6. He even gave a shout-out to a political revolution that will likely shape election landscapes for years to come.

7. And with three simple words, Obama reminded us disparaging your opponent may be easy, but it doesn't produce results.

When the crowd erupted in "boos" at the mention of Trump's name, Obama was quick to reiterate that booing is not democracy in action — organizing, canvassing, making phone calls, and voting is.

The president knows that a great speech or inspiring quote means nothing if it doesn't spark real action.

Take a hint from the president — even if he didn't win your vote — and cast a ballot this November for your candidate. Register to vote today.

Most Shared

There was more to Third Eye Blind's RNC-related performance than just 'trolling.'

Whether or not you agree with their message, their willingness to take a stand speaks volumes.

Do you remember the band Third Eye Blind? (Don't lie; you know you do.)

GIF from Elektra/YouTube.


Well, they were in Cleveland to play a show at the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame while the Republican National Convention was taking place down the street. Playing for an RNC-friendly audience, the '90s alt-rockers decided to use the platform to speak up for their own personal beliefs.

Stephan Jenkins of Third Eye Blind performs during a 2012 concert in New York City. Photo by Jason Kempin/Getty Images.

But in what many are calling an act of "trolling," the band's Cleveland show didn't feature many of the band's hits. Instead, it featured something much more heartfelt: truth.

"To love this song is to take into your heart the message and to actually have a feeling to arrive and move forward and not live your life in fear and imposing that fear on other people," Jenkins told the crowd before strumming the opening chords of "Jumper," a song about a gay friend of his who jumped from a bridge to his death.


He called on the audience to welcome LGBTQ people such as his gay family members "into the American fabric."

Some cheered and some booed, but everyone, for that brief moment in time, had a chance to reflect on where they stand on these important issues. Maybe if society would have been more accepting at the time, Jenkins' friend wouldn't have lost his life to suicide. While it's too late to change the past, a more welcoming world is still deeply needed today.

Four years ago, singer Jenkins blogged about the band's invitation to the 2012 RNC and why they declined.

"This is not my mom's Republican Party anymore," Jenkins wrote for The Huffington Post, criticizing the party's stance on things like LGBTQ issues, voter ID laws, disaster funding, and reproductive health.

"If I came to their convention," he later wrote, "I would Occupy their convention."

Fast forward four years, and Jenkins got his chance to do just that.

Jenkins performs during a 2014 concert in Dover, Delaware. Photo by Theo Wargo/Getty Images for Firefly Music Festival.

And whether or not you agree with Jenkins on political issues, you really have to respect the fact that he's willing to stand up for what he believes is right.

He's willing to put his career and reputation on the line to get across what he believes is an important message. Did he alienate some fans? Possibly. Still, he had the bravery to take a stand, and that's worthy of applause.

After slow-jamming the news with the president of the United States, Jimmy Fallon asked the commander-in-chief if he thought the Republicans were happy with Donald Trump as their nominee.

Image via "The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon"/YouTube.


Naturally, the president couldn't resist the obvious dig.

GIF via "The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon"/YouTube.

But the message he delivered next was sobering and surprisingly sympathetic to Republicans.

Image via "The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon"/YouTube.

"I actually am not enjoying, and I haven't been enjoying over the last seven years, watching some of the things that have happened in the Republican Party because there's good people in the Republican Party," the president said.

And he had a stern message for Democrats who might be tempted to take pleasure in their political opponents misfortune:

"What's happened in that party culminating in this current nomination, I think, is not actually good for the country as a whole. It's not something Democrats should wish for."

"Democracy works, this country works, when you have two parties that are serious and trying to solve problems," Obama told Fallon.

A healthy Republican Party, the president argued, is essential to making concrete, lasting progress, insisting that the last thing Democrats should root for is a weak, poorly led opposition.

"You want folks who understand the issues and where you can sit across the table from them and you have a principled argument, and ultimately, you can still move the country forward."

To some extent, this is simply an extension of what Obama has said countless times before.

Photo by Spencer Platt/Getty Images.

Exhorting political opponents to debate each other in good faith is a theme the president frequently returns to, dating all the way back to his breakout 2004 Democratic National Convention speech.

But it has taken on a new urgency now. As we're seeing, a fractured GOP doesn't lead to a stronger democracy or country but instead leads to greater incivility.

It's how you wind up with a presumptive nominee who argues that a federal judge should be disqualified from adjudicating a case against him on the basis of the judge's race.

It's how you wind up with GOP Sen. David Perdue saying a "prayer" for President Obama but actually quoting a Bible verse, which, in its original context, has frequently been interpreted as a call for the subject's death.

And, on the other side, it's how you wind up with protesters throwing eggs at Trump supporters, punching them, and even allegedly assaulting them with weapons.

The good news? It doesn't have to be this way.

See! There's LBJ! And Eisenhower! Happy! Together! Photo by Abbie Rowe/LBJ Museum and Library.

"There are wonderful Republicans out in the country who want what's best for the country and may disagree with me on some things but are good decent people," the president said.

The more Republicans put their best, most thoughtful, most qualified people in charge, and the less Democrats argue with them vigorously without shouting them down or right-hooking them in the face, the better off we'll all be.

Because, whether you're a Democrat, a Republican, or neither, the president is right: The best version of our democracy is not when we all agree on everything — but when we disagree in good faith.

Watch the full interview below: