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21 anonymous parents confess how they're battling burnout by any means possible

"I throw out my kids' crafts and I don't feel bad about it."

Canva Photos & Skylight

Parents are really struggling, and they're confessing the little ways they get by under all the pressure.

I was trying to make a dentist appointment for my two kids last week. Or, rather, I was trying to reschedule a dentist appointment. I'd made one six months ago at their last visit for a day and time that seemed to make sense, but that was basically an educated guess at best. Six months might as well be six years ago! I had no idea what our schedule would be so far in the future, so I did my best. But now it was time to move it, of course, because I had been completely wrong.

I called the office, but no answer. Called again, no answer. Left a message, no call back. Finally, I was able to get a hold of someone through the office's text line. They offered up some new dates and times, which was great. So, I went to check our calendar.

Day 1 didn't work because of back to school "sneak previews." The timing on Day 2 didn't work because my youngest isn't allowed to show up to daycare summer camp past 11 (don't even get me started). Day 3 didn't work because the plumber was scheduled to come that morning. Day 4 didn't work because I had a dentist appointment of my own! I thought day 5 might be a winner, but then my wife reminded me that it was the second day of school—and we couldn't take our kids out of school on their second day of both starting new schools!

In the end, honestly, I just gave up. I needed a break. I had other things to do and my brain was starting to hurt. Plus, I'd already spent what felt like hours on this allegedly simple task.

So, my confession as a dad is that my kids are currently overdue for the dentist, and making them a new appointment is still pending on my To-Do list, because I literally just can't right now. Apparently, I'm not the only one who feels that way.

The folks at Skylight have been collecting confessions from anonymous parents, who share how they're surviving the chaos: Whether it's taking shortcuts, telling little white lies, or just feeling guilty for always falling short. Whatever it is, these parents are doing their best and still struggling.

But that doesn't mean that some of the confessions aren't hilarious. Others are incredibly moving. Overall, it's the perfect picture of the joy, the love, and the anxious guilt that all come together to make up modern parenting.

Yes, people knowingly sign up for this when they have kids, but it's impossible to know just how difficult and frustrating it can be before you're in the thick of it every day. It's also awesome and so fun and joyful! That's the beauty of it all.

Here are some of the best responses from Skylight's anonymous confessions.

parenting, parents, kids, family, stress, anxiety, parenting stress, millennial parents, modern families, culture, society "Sometimes I book a babysitter just so I can drive around in my car alone."Skylight

"I skip pages at bedtime stories." —Dad, 33

"There's a 50/50 shot I forget it's early dismissal. " —Dad, 48

"Still haven't unpacked their backpacks from June. Should be fun." —Dad, 41

"Whenever I want time alone I tell the kids I'm planning Christmas. Even if its March. " —Mom, 45

"I never filled out my kid's baby books. " —Mom, 29

"I throw out my kid's crafts and I don’t feel bad about it. " —Mom, 44

I relate to so many of these, so much so that it hurts. As I'm writing this, there is a cardboard box in my garage filled with just a year's worth of my kids artwork, school papers, and crafts. The box is overflowing and I keep having ideas of sorting through it so I can save the really good stuff, but I just can't get around to it. Literally, I can barely get to the box because it's buried under a ton of other junk I have to sort through!

In my house, we've all but given up saving new artwork unless it's really special, and most of what's in the box will probably be thrown away. I feel guilty as hell about it but I just can't create more hours in the day to deal with it.

parenting, parents, kids, family, stress, anxiety, parenting stress, millennial parents, modern families, culture, society "I secretly prayed my kid's Little League team would lose."Skylight

Here are some more good ones:

"Sometimes when my children are fighting I just let them have it out and continue to read my books." —Mom, 37

"I tell my kids I'm going in my room to work, and not to interrupt. When in fact I am eating ice cream and watching my show." —Mom, 36

"If we don’t have cash in the house for the tooth fairy, we use money from their piggy bank." —Dad, 35

"I tell my kids I’m studying, but really I’m reading my spicy book. " —Mom, 42

"That cute, smiling picture I posted on IG? My toddler was having a full blown meltdown and the only reason she smiled was because I sang Baby Shark." —Mom, 33

"I’m never sad when a practice or game canceled for rain or heat!" —Mom, 39

As a travel soccer family, I can definitely relate to the sweet relief of a cancelled practice. Our daughter goes about three times per week year round, which is an enormous time commitment. The practices are usually in the evenings around dinner time, and we have a younger kid that needs to keep a normal schedule, so practice evenings are usually pretty chaotic and often end with one or many of us eating junk from McDonald's. Worse, I feel a lot of guilt that I stay in the car or at a nearby coffee shop working on my laptop while other parents are out in lawn chairs watching practice. What am I doing wrong? I wonder constantly.

parenting, parents, kids, family, stress, anxiety, parenting stress, millennial parents, modern families, culture, society "I told my kid our town doesn't have a hockey team, because lord knows I'm not waking up ... to take him to practice."Skylight

OK, here are just a few more:

"All I want is time with my kids and time without my kids." —Mom, 33

"Yes, I threw out your Halloween candy." —Dad, 52

"I’ve forgotten my son at early pick up before." —Mom, 37

"Some days, I feel like I’m not giving enough to either side of my life." —Mom, 32

"I’m constantly feeling guilty when I’m not with my kids but feel overwhelmed when I’m with them. " —Mom, 44

Ah, yes, the true brilliance of being a parent is that you get to feel like you're failing in every aspect of your life simultaneously. Parenting takes time and energy away from advancing in your career, but don't worry, your career also takes time and energy away from being a great parent. It's so awesome!

You can see all the confessions as they roll in right here.

parenting, parents, kids, family, stress, anxiety, parenting stress, millennial parents, modern families, culture, society "i told them I had to work late, but I just drove around crying until I felt better."Skylight

In 2024, Skylight teamed up with The Harris Poll to create something called the Mental Load Report. The findings were fascinating and illuminating.

The survey results showed that parents spent an average of 30.4 hours per week on "planning and coordinating family schedules and household tasks," or the equivalent of a near-full-time job.

Parents were found to receive an average of 17.5 communications (emails, texts, phone calls) about their kids' activities every week. It's a stark difference from when we were kids and our parents never heard anything until it was Report Card time.

Planning for "time off"—securing childcare, summer breaks, activities, etc.—took over 100 hours per year. Summer vacation? Yeah, right.

Moms, unsurprisingly, are carrying more of the mental load. But 60% of all parents felt taken for granted or under-appreciated in their household for all the care and planning that they do.

Add it all up and it's no wonder the US Surgeon General put out an advisory warning recently about the poor mental health of parents. An advisory is a "public statement that calls the American people's attention to an urgent public health issue and provides recommendations for how it should be addressed." The report lobbied for expanded paid family leave, expanding public and private insurance coverage of mental health care like therapy, and creating more family-friendly and free community spaces like parks.

Those measures would go a long way, but in the meantime, parents are just trying to cope any way that they can. Whether that's stealing some of your kid's Halloween candy for a little pick me up, or telling them you have an appointment just so you can go somewhere quiet and scream in your car. We're getting by, however we can.

After 50 years, a controversial calendar surprised the world in a wonderful way.

"I felt I looked more beautiful than I've ever felt in my life," Amy Schumer says about the Pirelli calendar.

Progress is usually measured in calendar years, not calendars themselves. But this may be an exception.

For more than 50 years, Italian tire manufacturer Pirelli has released an annual calendar. Typically filled with pictures of models posing provocatively in various states of undress, the almost always NSFW calendar was the very epitome of the adage "sex sells."

For the 2016 calendar, they decided to try something a little different.


All GIFs from Harper's Bazaar/YouTube.

The 2016 Pirelli calendar features women ranging in age from 19 to 82, and only one of them is a professional model.

This is a marked difference from calendars in past years that featured the likes of Adriana Lima, Kate Moss, Karlie Kloss, Miranda Kerr, and Rosie Huntington-Whiteley.

But the 2016 calendar lineup — shot by Annie Leibovitz — features writer and editor Tavi Gevinson, tennis champion Serena Williams, artist Yoko Ono, author Fran Lebowitz, rock legend Patti Smith, famed producer Kathleen Kennedy, businesswoman Mellody Hobson, director Ava DuVernay, philanthropist Agnes Gund, visual artist Shirin Neshat, model (and Pirelli calendar alum) Natalia Vodianova, and comedian Amy Schumer.


The calendar embraces the fact that women come in all shapes, sizes, and colors. It's a feminist statement.

And that seems to be a sentiment shared by many of the calendar's stars. For example, here's DuVernay, the history-making director of "Selma," on what the calendar's shift means to her.

Neshat echoes those feelings with her own statement. What's interesting, however — and what might actually be the biggest sign that yes, this is a step in the right direction despite there being so much more progress to be made — is how simple these goals seem.

Honoring women based on accomplishment and not solely on youth or appearance shouldn't have to be a statement in and of itself — but it is.

There's no real "shock value" in overt, hyper-sexualized pictorials anymore.

"A white, able-bodied cisgendered woman being naked is just not revolutionary anymore," Rookie Magazine founder and editor-in-chief Tavi Gevinson tells the New York Times. "I don't think anyone is going to be like, 'Damn, I wanted those naked chicks.'"

There is no shortage of "naked chicks" in magazines or online. But places that used to use sexualized nudity to draw attention — such as Playboy, which has announced a sunset of the magazine's famous nude photo spreads, and the rebranding efforts of magazines like Maxim — are finding there can be more success in simply taking things from a more real (and less airbrushed) angle.

The 2016 Pirelli calendar promotes self-love and finding your own definition of beauty.

No, it's not "Real women have curves" or Meghan Trainor lyrics about how awful "skinny bitches" are. Those cases simply trade in one pain point for another. We can do better.

Amy Schumer tweeted her picture from the calendar — in which she's wearing nearly nothing — along with a perfect rundown of the contradictions women (and all people, really) are forced to navigate on a daily basis.

But during a behind-the-scenes interview, she really summed up what makes Pirelli's 2016 calendar so great: She can see herself in it. Literally.

And while unlike Schumer, you and I may not actually see ourselves in the pages, maybe we can catch glimpses of ourselves a little bit here or a little bit there in the calendar's pages — the good, the bad, the beautiful, and the ugly — more so than ever before.

2015 saw some great progress for women around the world, and this is a great way to keep up that momentum in the new year. What better way to start 2016 than with some love and acceptance?

Learn more about the making of Pirelli's calendar in this video from Harper's Bazaar.