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Parenting

Parents share 24 unhinged sentences they never imagined saying before having kids

"Please stop licking the shopping cart."

licking, kids licking, kids lick, germs kids, gross kids
Image via Canva

Parents share funny and unhinged things they've had to say to their kids since becoming parents.

Being a parent brings unexpected surprises everyday. From sudden unexpected talent show appearances to their hilarious locker decor and expert roasting quips, kids are always keeping parents on their toes. And their antics have required a number of unhinged parenting sentences to be uttered. In an online parenting community, member @Plomaster69 posed the question to fellow parents: "What's a sentence you never thought you'd say until you had kids?"

They went on to explain, "'Please stop licking the shopping cart.' I said this to my 4-year-old at Target last week and had to pause for a moment. Like, where do you even begin with that conversation? How did we get to a point where I needed to explain why metal shopping cart handles aren't meant to be tasted?"

It's a conversation that they anticipated many other parents have had to have with their kids. "Before kids, I thought parenting would be about teaching important life lessons and having meaningful conversations. Instead, I spend my days saying things like 'we don't put PlayDoh in our ears' and 'the dog's food is not people food' and 'yes, you still have to wear pants to the grocery store," they shared.

playdoh, playdoh hair, playdoh gif, playdoh fun, playing with playdoh90S Hair GIFGiphy

They ended their post by adding, "The weirdest part is how these completely unhinged sentences just roll off your tongue now. My neighbor heard me tell my kid 'stop trying to marry the vacuum cleaner' and didn't even blink. We've all been there."

Fellow parents had plenty of relatable phrases to share. These are 24 of the most unhinged (and funny) things parents have said to their kids:

"'Don't use your willy to swipe the Kindle screen'." @alancake

"'Stop folding your sister'."@ Cluelessish

"Similar. But, 'Don't lick the toilet!' In a public bathroom." @Musin_Geek

lick toilet, licking toilet, toilet bowl, toilet, lickToliet GIF by Adult SwimGiphy

"'Please stop sniffing each others butts'." @Affectionate_Cow_812

"'Please stop beatboxing when I'm on the phone with a client'." @Mamapalooza

"'Don't drink your bath water'."@ shoshinatl

up nose, stick up nose, put up nose, up your nose, stick in noseGood Burger Dancing GIF by BounceGiphy

"'Don’t put the bottoms of shoes on your face.' 'Don’t lick the cat.' 'Don’t stick that up your nose'." @TopHippo3938

"Hahaha yeah..... things like 'We do not eat stones'. 'Please don't attack the cheese with the scissors', and 'Legos don't belong in the fridge'. 'Please put your plate back on the table and use a fork, you are not a dog.' 'you shouldn't wear your sisters panty on your head when we are going out' are common occurrences and my kids are 7 and 10....Sometimes I run out of words though. My 7yo has developed a habit of climbing up to the very top of doorframes and sticking there like a freaking gecko until someone passes through to pounce... what do I even say. 'You're not a predator, stay on the ground'?" @No_Assistant2804

"We keep a list of ours! Some notable additions: 'Not everything has to be a hat, (child name)'. 'Please don’t play the piano with you face'. 'Try not to sneeze on your pain au chocolat again'. Special mention for one to my husband: 'There’s nothing sexy about piles, Jack.'" @sophie_shadow

"'Did you just GLUE your sister’s foot to that?!' -me, just last night." @winezilla08

glue, glued, school glue, gluing, elmer'selmers glue school GIF by Elmer's ProductsGiphy

"'We do not steal other people’s pets and set up pet shops at the side of the road'. 🙈" @kt1982mt

"'No eating the stairs'. You could swap out stairs for table, garbage can, me. It’s all valid. Poor little guy is going through it but he also refuses to hold anything made for teething and prefers to run wild and free." @imwearingredsocks

"'How many pretzels did you put up your nose?!'" @BabeWithThe_Power


Girl stops 80s game show host in his tracks as he tries to kiss her

The 80s seems like a completely different lifetime when it comes to what was considered acceptable behavior. Things people deemed acceptable or were just part of everyday expectations for television back in the 60s through well into the 90s would get stars blacklisted today. But there was one game show in the 80s that had moments so cringy that even for the times may have raised some eyebrows though everyone seemed to go along with it, except one brave little girl.

The Canadian show, Just Like Mom ran from 1980-1985 even with the uncomfortable moments between the game show host and young girls. The girls who were aged 7-12 would appear on the show with their mother answering questions about each other and competing in bake-offs to see which pair knew each other best. Just Like Mom was created by Catherine Swing, the wife of the show's host Fergie Olver who would often stand uncomfortably close to the girls and elicit kisses.

 80s game show; just like mom; Fergie Olver; 80s childhood; family game show; body autonomy Mom hugging crying daughterPhoto credit: Canva

Recently a compilation video of the game show host behaving in a manner people might consider questionable is going viral. In the video the Olver stands near the girls, often putting his hand on their backs, placing his face close to theirs to ask questions. The very first clip shows 11-year-old Lee Ann, Olver hovers over her asking what color her eyes are.

"What color are your eyes?" Olver asks before the child tells him they're blue, to which he responds, "they're not blue, now don't tell me that. Look at me a little closer." Just as the girl leans in slightly, appearing hesitant to do so, Olver quickly kisses the child on the side of her mouth and declares, "they're green."

 80s game show; just like mom; Fergie Olver; 80s childhood; family game show; body autonomy Dad kissing child on cheekPhoto credit: Canva

The audience sounds as if they didn't know how to react to the bizarre moment. Some people loudly gasp, others uncomfortably chuckle, while a few seem to let out a high pitched surprised squeal. The girl also laughs uneasily while the host remains extremely close. Video clip after video clip shows similar interactions where the host tries to either kiss the girls or have them kiss him but one little girl refused. While it appeared that she was nervous to do so in front of a live audience, on television and refusing a directive from an adult, she stood her ground.

This was a moment where parents can see in real time the benefit of teaching body autonomy and the power of teaching children that no is a complete sentence. Olver originally didn't accept the young girl's "no," attempting to coerce her into kissing him when she was clearly uncomfortable and uninterested in the request.

The host perches himself up close to the young girl and says, "you look like a girl who likes to give out hugs and kisses," to which the girl laughs with discomfort before saying, "not really." That didn't stop him, Olver continued, "not really? can I have a hug and a kiss?" This time the girl gives a very direct answer through nerves by shaking her head no while saying "uh-uh." She's clearly uncomfortable as she bites her fingernail trying to assert authority over her body against someone much older.

At this point the child has been clear. She immediately told the host she didn't give out hugs and kisses and when that didn't work she mustered the courage to say no more directly. Olver was still not accepting of the child's boundaries and continued to apply pressure by questioning her decision, "I can't have one?" Again the child shakes her head and says no but he persists, saying "even if I say...whisper in your ear that Alison you're going to win the show? I still can't have a hug and a kiss?" Alison sticks to her answer so Olver changes tactics, telling the child, "Well I guess you can't win the show then if I don't get a hug and a kiss."

 80s game show; just like mom; Fergie Olver; 80s childhood; family game show; body autonomy Mom comforting daughterPhoto credit: Canva

Alison stayed firm in her no but the host's behavior resulted in the child's mother calling him a dirty old man. In the end the host appears to have moved on and told the girl she did a good job answering one of the questions, but to top the praise Olver attempts to sneak a kiss. The little girl didn't let that deter her as she quickly dodged his advance.

It seems apparent that Alison's parents instilled the idea of bodily autonomy in her giving her full permission to say no to adults and anyone else who dares to get in her space without consent. While the experience was probably not one that she would've ever wanted to have, that moment likely gave permission to other young girls watching to tell the host and other like him no. And no is a complete sentence, especially when it comes to someone's body. There's no further explanation needed. No further clarification. The answer is simply no. Well done Alison. Well done.

This article originally appeared in May.

Culture

Boomers and Gen Xers share 30 things they don't miss from the 80s and 90s

"Using those Noxzema pads to burn and dry out my pimply face. It had a smell, too."

Images via Canva

Boomers and Gen Xers discuss the things they don't miss from the 1980s and 1990s.

Nostalgia is all about remembering how things were in the "gold old days." But sometimes, upon further reflection, some things really sucked in the past despite how rosy our colored glasses made them look. Boomers and Gen Xers are reminiscing on the things they really don't miss from the 1980s and 1990s.

Over on Reddit, member pizzagamer35 posed the question to Boomers and Gen Xers: "What is something you do NOT miss from the 80s-90s?"

Boomers and Gen Xers had plenty of throwback experiences and products they are happy to never come across again. These are 30 of the most nostalgic responses from Boomers and Gen Xers about things they don't miss about the 80s and 90s.

 landline, landline phone, 90s phone, phone call, retro phone Saved By The Bell Laughing GIF  Giphy  

"Long distance phone bill." —gohdnuorg

"Having to wait until after 7pm or whatever so you could call your long distance friends because it was free after that." —raz0rbl4d3

"Answering the landline and having no idea who's calling. Just raw, unfiltered anxiety." —Fit-Interview-3886

"Not having GPS." —recrysis

"Smoking or non smoking and still be in the smoking section." —Less-Lengthiness4863

 smoking, smoke, cigarettes, smoking section, smoking 90s mothers day smoking GIF  Giphy  

"Using those Noxzema pads to burn and dry out my pimply face. It had a smell, too." —poizon_elff

"Waiting for JPGs to load one line at a time." —timmayd

"Those hair ties with the two giant plastic beads on them that EVERY mom used to tie up their daughter's hair in pigtails. God forbid she lose her grip on one while she was already ripping your soul out through your scalp." —Honey-Badger-90

"Third degree burns from metallic seat belt fasteners." —JLMTIK88

"Not being able to use the internet if someone needed the phone line to be free." —Joshawott27

 internet, internet 90s, dial up internet, old internet, slow internet Girl 90S GIF  Giphy  

"Satanic panic." —Historical_Spot_4051

"Buying a CD and realizing all the songs suck, except for one, maybe two." —11B-E5

"Batteries and flashlight bulbs. Holy crap they were crap. I still remember seeing the little LED light on our shitty car radio and asking dad what kind of light that tiny dot was. He told me it was a diode and diodes kinda 'last forever'. I immediately wondered why the hell we weren't developing that tech." —snoozieboi

"Shoulder pads." —Thin_Apartment_8076

 shoulder pads, shoulder pad, 80s shoulder pads, 90s shoulder pads, vintage style Mc Hammer Dancing GIF by Jukebox Saints  Giphy  

"Ordering pizza by calling the restaurant and yelling your order to a guy in a noisy kitchen. Missing an episode of your favorite TV show (or forgetting to tape it if you had a VCR) and not being able to see it until summer reruns, or maybe never." —Imaginary-List-4945

"Terrible contact lenses." —MandatoryMatchmaker

"To contribute something small: manual computer defragmentation. It took several hours and you couldn't do anything else." —rena-vee

"Pay Phones that gave you limited talk time." —Aggravating-Iron9804

 pay phone, payphone, payphones, payphone, 90s phone Season 3 Marge GIF by The Simpsons  Giphy  

"Gym class. Boys were expected to know how to play sports. My dad taught me how to fix tractors and cut firewood, but he didn't teach me sports because no one ever taught him. The gym teacher didn't teach us sh*t. When we f*cked up or didn't know what to do, the jocks would laugh and the teacher would join in the fun." —Fluffy-Cupcake9943

"The 'heroin chic' body type." —Heartbreak_Star

"Panty hose." —Kitty-haha

"Aqua net=hair that absolutely did not move! And you could see little hairspray bubbles 😔🫠😂😂." — IAmTheBlackStar1979

"Having to rewind VHS tapes like it was a part-time job." -—Repulsive_Corgi_6187

 vhs, vhs tape, vhs rewind, rewinding vhs, vhs rewinding Animated GIF  Giphy  

"Waiting by the radio for your song to play so you can record it on tape." —mycrml

"Serial killers. They just can't exist at the same level anymore. Plus we got all the lead out of stuff. So now people are 100% normal. 100%." —PrimeNumbersby2

"Manual roll up/down windows in cars." —Human-Average-2222

"Carpeted bathrooms. someone shared a bunch of pictures of them on some nostalgia account and i could smell the pictures through my phone 🤢." —GoblinHeart1334

"Busy signal on the phone." —crjconsulting

Image via Canva

Frugal people share the best $50 or less investments that have saved them exponentially more.

Sometimes you have to spend money to save money, and people who live a budget-conscious, frugal lifestyle have perfectly mastered how to do it.

In a Reddit post, member jul_on_ice posed the question: "What’s one small upgrade (under $50) that saved you more money than you expected?"

They continued, "Talking about small wins that compounded over time over one thing that made a drastic difference. Frugality is often about not spending but sometimes investments can pay off. Maybe something that made work easier. Made life better. Made you more comfortable. Or something bought once that replaced lots of things you once had to spend on."

Fellow frugal people had lots of money saving hacks to share. These are 35 things that frugal people spent less than $50 on that have saved them lots of money.

"Vacuum sealer. I’m single and most shopping/recipes are four or five meals for me. Often I would have food waste because I no longer wanted the food after the third meal. Now I cook, have the leftovers I want, and vacuum seal the rest in portions. Keeps the food fresh and saves room in my freezer." —mercfan3

"Don’t rent the modem/router combo from Comcast. Just buy your own." —Dove_of_Doves

"A couple of incredibly mundane purchases that I should have made years earlier: having extra sets of measuring spoons (~ $3 per set) makes cooking so much easier; a digital cooking thermometer (~ $15); and a tire inflator that plugs into the car's cigarette lighter ($35) so I can top up the tires at home, rather than trying to find a place with a working air hose. ETA: A french press ($20) and electric kettle ($25). Have used the same french press for more than a decade, and get better tasting coffee without buying filters or K-cups. An electric kettle is surprisingly useful." —Taggart3629

"$9 3-cup rice cooker." —CeleronHubbard

"Popsicle molds. I live in the desert and we eat so many popsicles. Making them myself has saved money and they’re healthier." —Adventurous-Fig-5179

"Dropped cable, kept internet only. Pay for separate Netflix and Disney and all total we save $35 a month over the cable bundle. We did not watch 90% of the channels included. Definite win for us." —GarudaMamie

"Adding an over-the-air antenna. Is a great addition to cutting that “cable tv” cord. It is much easier than you think." —williamtrose367

"We got a renter friendly bidet and it has saved us SO MUCH in toilet paper usage." —Specific_Wait_8006

"We went with cloth diapers when the kids were little it saved us a bunch and kept a bunch of garbage out of the landfill. Once they were potty trained we were able to sell a lot of them." —Responsible-Charge27

"Maybe not a quantifiable dollar amount of a change, but I switched my mindset from “Unitaskers are bad” to “Unitaskers are acceptable if they do the 1 thing better than anything else”. Example: Those plastic pulled pork meat claw things are not better than a fork for the task of shredding meat, but a good mandolin slicer is much faster and probably safer overall than a knife, and rice cookers can cook rice exceptionally well, even if that’s all they do." —Ryutso

"Needles and threads. You can fix anything material with small rips or tears. I’ve extended the life of clothes, bags, and kids stuffed animals by years." —baldbutthairy

"I know this sounds crazy, but realizing I could buy more than one of something (e.g. bath mats, reading glasses, chargers, etc.) I had to really work on changing my thinking around this due to past financial challenges." SomeTangerine1184

"Second hand slow cooker. Money saving meals made from cheap tinned foods: daal, chilli, casserole, soups." —Ambitious_Ad1844

"Anything like this is usually an inexpensive household repair that I waited too long to do. Replacing loose door handles, fixing a leaky faucet, repairing the drip line from my A/C. Little cheap things that just made my life... better." —gogomom

"My aeropress has been a ridiculously good investment. It’s much more portable than a french press. I have it with me now while I’m travelling and I can access a good cup of coffee using the hotel kettle." —mrjasong

"I am a freezie human and nowhere is that more apparent than on airplanes. So I had this 'warm fuzzy' vest for wearing on the plane with a tougher outer fabric and a soft fleecy inner. I paid a seamstress to add an invisible zipper to one of the seams on the inside of the vest and now the gap in between the fleece inner fabric and the tougher outer fabric is what in the 1920s would be called a 'passthrough pocket' or modern hunters might call it a 'game pocket'. But you know what else? It's now my personal item and I wear it on the plane, Scott-e-Vest style, but cheaper. And now because of that, I can fly more budget airlines because I have less luggage-as-in-bags." —heinfamousj

"The jury is still out, but I recently made the switch to rechargeable AA batteries. I'm optimistic this will save me money as I use AAs in my camera flashes and go through a lot of them. It's not a purchase, but rather a process that I think is going to help a lot. I put everything on my 2% cash back credit card and pay it off at the end of the month. Recently, to get a better handle on my daily spending, I decided on what my monthly credit card bill goal should be. Divide that number by 30 and I get my daily spending goal. I then created a spreadsheet and track how much I spend each day and have a column with a running total for over/under. It's motivating to look and see 'Hey, I'm $XXX under budget so far for the month.' The daily goal is high enough to account for things like gas in my truck, haircuts and groceries." —No_Blueberry_8454

"Yearly paper planner. No more missed rendez-vous or deadlines, no more late fees. I tried going digital, but it doesn't work for my ADHD brain. I just snooze the reminders and forget about it. Until it's too late. So I went back to paper, and it's worth the $12-ish per year to me." —Duck__Holliday

"Bought a dead battery Dyson vacuum on Facebook market. Did the Ryobi battery upgrade. Got cheap 8ah Ryobi battery off ebay. Got a cheap Ryobi battery Charger off facebook market. Total all was about $50-60 and it works great." —antsam9

"Dying my hair at my hairdresser rather than at home. No more stains from the home dye. No wrecked towels, clothing or hair." —JoyCrazy

"If you drink a lot of soda or sparkling water, a Soda Stream can help you save. Just the CO2 canisters comes out to about $0.11 for 12 ounces vs paying about $0.50 per can of store bought soda. What gets you are the syrups… that can bring the price up to $0.40 ish per 12 ounces. So to be extra frugal, you could make your own fruit syrups and skip the store-bought stuff. Make a simple syrup (one part sugar, one part water; boil on the stove) and add lemon or lime or orange juice or whatever… I’m sure there are recipes all over the internet. And boom, homemade La Croix. It’s an investment to start, but saves over time." —Drooly_Cat_1103

"Somewhat location dependent but if you are in a dry climate like me and rely on humidifiers running 24/7, buy a cheap water distiller on Amazon (I think mine was like $60 but close enough, you might even find one under 50 if you look/wait for a sale). Distilled water gets pricey, but not using distilled water will junk up your humidifier with minerals which is both a bitch to clean and can eventually cause problems with the function. Save yourself the trouble. Also useful for steam cleaners, mixing your own cleaning sprays from concentrates, misting bottles, etc. At least if you have hard water, anything where you are repeatedly putting a lot through a very small line, distilled is preferred to prevent mineral buildup." —ilanallama85

"I got a Walmart+ membership (got it for $49, it renews at half off the $99 at anniversary). I get free shipping, so when I need something small (like shampoo), I don't need to run to the store. I've used Walmart+ so much more than I ever used Amazon Prime. It costs less, and I find I buy less random crap with Walmart+ than Prime." —sbinjax

"Three inexpensive manual coffee makers: Bialetti Moka Express pot, Bodum French Press, and V60 pour over. Bought all 3, virtually new, at the thrift shop for under 20 total about 5 years ago. The Bialetti makes an espresso-like cup, the Bodum is rich and strong, and the V60 makes a softer, smoother cup of coffee." —zeitness

"Not sure this will ever meaningfully 'pay out' on the investment, but a timer switch for the bathroom fan. I have ADHD and benefit from as many "set it and forget it" items as I can possibly get. Now I can set the fan, have a shower, walk away, and it'll turn itself off after a decent airing-out, and I don't end up walking by the bathroom 4 hours later like 'how long has the fan been on??' Less electricity used, less wear and tear on the fan, less conditioned air lost. Is it more savings than the amount I spent? Probably not for a long time. But it feels better!" —Kitchen-Owl-7323

"A shutoff valve to go above the shower heads in my kids’ bathroom’s so I can limit the flow. We have high water pressure and my kids universally put the faucets at max flow. I used the valves to cut the flow in half. The water pressure is still great but now they use half the water and the hot water now lasts through all six of our showers. I haven’t calculated the savings but I know we are using much less energy in water heating and much less water." —nottherealme1220

"A $30.00 pair of very high quality sharp scissors bought at a sewing machine store 20 years ago freed me forever from paying for haircuts. One YouTube video showed me how to trim & maintain - done. My brother bought a clipper set for $20.00 at the same time and does his own cuts. All that money gets plunked into savings!" —VulcanGreeting

"i switched from some fancy expensive work boots id been wearing to some 18 dollar shoes with 10 dollar insoles i got at walmart. i added the extra insoles on top of the existing ones for extra comfort. this saved me however how much i would have spent for my foot pain that was nearing bad enough to warrant medical attention. these are seriously the most comfortable shoes i have ever owned, i even wear them outside of work, on hikes, just going out on a wet day. over a year in and the extra insoles might need replaced in a few months but the shoes and their original insoles (the ones on bottom) are holding up perfectly. I'm in a better mood at work now too." —cccameronnn

Canva

A concert crowd. An 80s woman. A skateboarder.

When many think of Generation X, they think "cynical slacker," i.e. baby-busting latchkey kids who were faced with so much world trauma, they never had the time nor the resources to process.

The Financial Brand, a database benefiting marketers, describes the generation as "once characterized as apathetic 'grunge kids.'" But now, with age, there has been a pivot in the perception, at least in terms of advertising. "Gen Xers are now known for independence, individualism and entrepreneurialism."

They further explain how we came to be this way: "Their childhood was marked by the end of the Cold War and the rise of personal computers — indeed, Gen X invented the internet economy — as well as a record-high divorce rate and the AIDS epidemic. They entered adulthood in a poor economy, which was further destabilized by the 9/11 terrorist attacks and the 2008 Great Recession, contributing to the generation’s reputation for cynicism. Many are now caring for children and aging parents at the same time, and Gen Xers carry the highest debt load of any generation."

  Reality Bites, Winona Ryder, Ben Stiller, 80s movies, Gen X  www.youtube.com, Universal Studios 

But what ultimately became of this hardship was happiness. We were scrappy because we had to be. Our individualism turned many of us into entrepreneurs who created our own guidelines and goal posts. Out were the rule books so many of our parents followed and in was the idea that we could kinda just do whatever the heck we wanted.

In the recent article "Yes, Generation X is the coolest generation and (whisper it) the happiest too" forThe Independent, Bill Borrows confidently exclaims, "Gen-Xers (those born between 1965 and 1980) are now in their fifties and still doing what they were doing after the Berlin Wall came down and have never really stopped doing: having fun, living life."

Borrows notes the slew of authors writing about Gen X, many with conflicting theories. He shares how The Economist "dubbed us the new problem generation," while Vogue actually admits we're cool, as we were the "unbothered people that nobody talks about."

He claps back, "The cool ones have always been the 'unbothered people that nobody talks about.' Welcome to the party – it’s been going on for decades, but better late than never. It’s nice that Gen Z (1997–2012) are getting the memo too."

The key to our happiness is our coolness. From high school to now, a lot of us just didn't stop living a fun life. The Pixies come to town? We're there. Skateboard parks and bar crawls? Sure. Maybe it was our latchkey independence that told us we didn't have to become stodgy, so…we didn't.

And the truth is, even though we were labeled unhappy slackers, we were always happy. Fifteen years ago, researchers specifically studying Gen X claimed we've been doing just fine for a while. In Alene Dawson's 2011 article "Study Says Generation X is balanced and happy," for CNN, she cites University of Michigan's The Generation X Report which claims Gen Xers (who at the time were between 30–45) are "active, balanced and happy."

Using the research, Dawson takes apart myths one by one. One such myth was "Generation X is depressed." On the contrary, she writes, "Generation X is actually pretty happy. Two-thirds of Generation X are satisfied with their job; 24% of these workers rated their job at 9 or 10 on the satisfaction scale. On a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 meaning very happy, the median happiness score was 8, with 29% of Gen Xers saying they were very happy, scoring a 9 or 10."

Many have opinions on the matter. In the comment section of Borrows' piece, one person writes, in part: "They were the last generation to grow up in an era where home ownership was a choice, not a pipedream, and in which corporations and investment groups hadn't utterly wrecked the rental market. They benefited from having relatively comfortably well-off parents, a low cost of living, and are currently the wealthiest demographic by age in the whole country because Austerity didn't devastate their earning ability as much as every generation that came after."

Even other generations agree. "It's lovely to see you X'ers grow up and find out what us boomers knew all along, that life is what you make of it. So sweet."

Over on the subreddit r/GenX, a Redditor perfectly exemplifies why Gen X was both cool and remain (for the most part) happy:


"a) we didn't start the fire.
b) we collectively fixed a hole in the g-damned ozone layer.
c) Ryan Reynolds.

I don't even need to get into our musical contribution to know the debate doesn't even need to begin."

Did you know the "pignose" on your backpack actually serves a purpose?

It’s always fascinating to gain new understanding of everyday sayings or items that we previously took for granted. In this case, new understanding might give you a whole new way to use said item. The item we’re talking about today is pig noses. Don’t worry, no actual pigs have been harmed.

As explained by a short and sweet video from @TheIronSnail on YouTube, pig noses are the name for that ubiquitous diamond shaped-latch with the two holes in it that you’ve undoubtedly seen on at least one of your backpacks.

The more formal name for this piece is a "lash tab," which makes its mysterious function actually make sense…if you’re a hiker, anyway. Lashing is a term for fastening two things together (usually a tool and a bag) with rope, to make traveling rugged terrain a little easier.

Lash tabs specifically were first used by mountaineers going on expeditions through colder climates, and therefore would hold ice tools—the ice pick, first and foremost.

As Michael Kristy, host of @TheIronSnail demonstrates in the clip (albeit with a hammer instead of a ice pick but you get the gist), the tool would first go through a loop at the bottom of the backpack, be flipped upside down, then tied with a small piece of rope that’s looped through the two hole of the pig nose. That way the ice pick—or hammer, or whatever—is secure without swinging about with every step.

  - YouTube  www.youtube.com  

But how did these diamond patches become a mainstream backpack staple, even for those who don’t hike?

In an interview between Reader’s Digest and Ryan Lee, director of product at JanSport backpack company (you know, that backpack brand that ALWAYS has pig noses) explained that back in its early years, JanSport sold their products at the campus bookstore at University of Washington. The students would then buy the backpacks meant for hiking and mountaineering to carry their books to class. That tipped JanSport off that maybe their backpacks were just as good for everyday folks. However, they kept the diamond tab to add a bit of rugged, adventurous flair. “A signature detail to nod to the past,” as Lee put it.

 backpacks, jansport, lash tab, hiking, mountaineering, fashion, history, explainer videos Going from class to class in college is pretty much the same things as hiking. Photo credit: Canva

That said, they lash tabs might seem like they don’t really function anymore, especially since, as Kristy noted in his video, most backpacks no longer come with the bottom loop intended to work with the tab. But, they can still be used, even if not to the same degree. You can still use a small bit of rope or cord to tie things to your backpack. You just might want to make sure that pig nose is made of a durable material like real leather and has reinforced patches and dense stitching warns backpack designer Dan Vinson.

@its.sherif

This is actually a genius idea🤯#sherifelsahly

Whether you now use your lash tab to make traversing the rugged terrains of life a little easier, or simply use it for style points, it’s cool to know you have options.