Leanne Ely has some aging advice that's actually great for any age.
We all have a different idea of what “aging gracefully” looks like, but it seems inarguable that we’d all like to get older in a way that feels healthy and fulfilling.
For women especially, helpful advice in this arena can feel hard to come by for a number of reasons. Blame it on historically claiming caretaking roles (and therefore not always acquiring self care skills), societal messaging of “women shouldn’t age, period,” or some other outdated nonsense.
Luckily, a bit of life advice from those who actually have made it to the golden years intact tends to help cut through the noise. New York Times bestselling author and the creator of SavingDinner.com, Leanne Ely just came out with a video with three key pieces of advice for women entering their 50s (especially perimenopausal women) who want to maintain their physical and mental wellbeing.
“If you are 50, I have a word of advice for you. I'm 67. Been there, done that, got the t-shirt,” Ely quipped at the beginning of her clip. “I am post-menopausal now, and so I am going to give you my 17-year advantage viewpoint, okay?”
Without further ado, here’s what Ely suggested:
1. Lift weights
An older woman lifting weights. Photo credit: Canva
“Preserve your bone, do everything in your power to use your body as the strength machine that it is,” Ely explained. “You don't want to be walking around complaining about your knees or your hip pain or whatever it is.”
“Your body needs to cooperate with your dreams. And the way that you do this is by getting in the best shape of your life. And I am not kidding. Move it or lose it and that goes for your muscles.”
She added that exercise alone can’t accommodate muscle health, and offered the tried-and-true advice of maintaining a balanced diet, saying, “...Feed your body like it is the most important person in your life. Feed it like your baby. Make sure that you're getting the right amount of protein, that you're hydrating correctly, and that you are feeding your mind...”
But it’s not just the body that needs to, as Ely put it, “cooperate with your dreams.” Relationships do too, which brings us to…
2. That man is not worth skipping your dreams for
A woman and her supportive (or perhaps unsupportive) partner. Photo credit: Canva
“Do you hear me?” said Ely. “I cannot tell you how many poor relationships I've been in and that includes way back then when I was 50. I spent nine years in a relationship with a man who looked down on me, and I didn't even see it.”
Of course, the best protection against this happening, Ely noted, is having a healthy self-esteem in the first place. Because “when you feel good about yourself and you know yourself, that is gonna trump all of the garbage that any man can throw your way.”
Which brings us to…
3. Be content with yourself
A content older woman smilingPhoto credit: Canva
“Know who you are. Stand firm in that person of who you are. This is important because you aren't here to be someone's second fiddle. You're not here to be degraded and spoken down to and condescended to and gas lit. You are here on purpose and for purpose. You are a human being and you are important. Just as you are. Without ever doing anything, you're here on purpose and for purpose and think about what that means. That means that you came to this earth because you were needed to be here on this earth and your purpose maybe it is yet to be found. But I do know this, if you work towards something that you love, you will find your purpose.”
This last one is a lesson so many of us take a lifetime to learn regardless of how many times we hear it, but always a good reminder.
Unsurprisingly, Ely’s video quickly racked up over 60,000 views and a flood of comments thanking her for her truly sage wisdom.
For many, it harkened back to a time when we were actually able to seek out advice like this from older women.
“This is why so many ancient cultures revered older women as the wise goddesses they are. Perfect advice. 56 here and these words grow stronger every day. 🙌💪”
Thank you for sharing! We as Gen X women need more older women role models like this. The “little frail old lady” stereotype was everywhere in our culture when we were growing up—no wonder we’re kinda scared to age. But here is a woman who is strong and vibrant and more self assured as she ages. I’m inspired! ✨
Others shared how they were already taking some of this advice, particularly tip #1—and reaping the benefits from it.
“65 year old here, I started adult ballet at 50 and can confirm that it changed my life. Now, 15 years later I take 4 classes per week; 2 of them are Pointe classes, something I never thought in my wildest dreams I would accomplish. I'm in the absolute best shape of my life. Doing splits and back bends, lifting weights and ensuring adequate protein intake to maintain my passion for ballet. It's been a life changer for my health, my mental wellbeing and my soul.”
“You are SO right!! I began putting priority on my work outs around age 54. I am 59 now. I feel as strong and healthy as when I was 35. People are commenting about me aging in reverse. Yes skin scare matters. But truly it is the work out!!! It is the protein and healthy diet. You are SO right! ✨🥰✨”
It probably goes without saying, but this is clearly great advice for any stage of life. Then again, the best advice is usually timeless.
Adam Met at the Time100 NEXT event.Photo by Kevin Mazur/Getty Images for TIME
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