+
upworthy
Pop Culture

People shared the 17 'dead giveaways' that someone has just lost an argument

People have a hard time admitting they are wrong.

how to argue, winning an argument, reddit
via Pexels

"Whatever, I'm over it!"

Here’s the problem with starting an argument with someone who’s clearly wrong. People with opinions that are not based on facts or logic have trouble with critical thinking, which also makes having a discussion with them terribly tricky because they don’t know the rules of engagement.

The first step to avoiding these situations is not having an argument. But if you have to settle a disagreement, it’s best to frame it as a discussion instead of an argument. The difference? “A discussion is a respectful exchange of information. An argument is a coercive attempt to be acknowledged as right or smart or sensitive,” Steven Stosny, Ph.D. writes in Psychology Today.

“In arguments, we invalidate feelings and undermine perspectives. In discussions, we validate feelings and expand perspectives,” Dr. Stosny continues.


One of the keys to having a good discussion is to listen to the other person and ask plenty of questions. This makes the other person feel heard and more likely for the two of you to find common ground. It can also reveal how much they know about the topic at hand.

But if you wind up getting into an argument, there are some telltale signs that you won the debate because the other person has been thrown from their facts and talking points and has to save face. A Reddit user by the name ViForYourAttention asked the forum, “What statement screams ‘I just lost the argument'? And they received a ton of great tactics and sayings that people turn to as a last resort.

The discussion wasn’t just full of great “gotcha” moments but a frank discussion on how to have an honest debate by learning to spot cheap tricks and personal attacks.

Here are 17 statements that scream, “I lost the argument.”

1.

"Pointing out a small discrepancy in an otherwise factual statement and pretending that invalidates their whole argument. 'I saw you get in a blue car and drive off with your secret lover when you said you were going for a walk.' 'You're completely wrong. It was a blue SUV, and I did go for a walk after.'" — jiyida8112

2.

"As soon as someone shifts the goalposts. It is important to be able to identify this. It is also important to know the difference between this and someone wording their initial argument poorly. ... But in general shifting goalposts means that they were losing an argument because of a unstable basis, so they'll shift their previously dogmatic basis to something more broad or they'll change their entire opinion midway through a conversation. The way to combat it is simply to always keep in mind the original intent of the conversation. Know what the initial claims were and move on from there always keeping those in mind." — Sovreign_grounds

3.

“I concede.” — Southern_Snowshoe

4.

"You spelled 'x' the wrong way." — GustavoAlex7789

5.

"I know you r but what am I?" — MineDamnBrain

6.

"Any personal insult. As soon as you comment on the person and not the topic, you've lost." — Aunt_Anne

7.

"[The moment someone says] 'I don't even care' or 'this is dumb."' — KarlaKaress

XXXSimply unstable added:

"'Whatever' or 'I'm over it' or both combined into 'Whatever, I'm over it!'"

8.

"You just lost a customer." — Sucros

9.

"When my husband sits there with that look on his face. That look that says he is waiting for me to put together some obvious pieces that I missed. I always find those pieces eventually. And then I concede, with an air of torture because he's always right. Always! As soon as I see that look, I lost." — gecepix937

10.

"Saying something completely irrelevant to the argument that they found on your post/comment history." — PM_ME_UR_FEET_69

11.

"'Oh yeah? Well, I know someone else who thought that way. Adolf Hitler!'" — hawt_pawket

12.

"Do your research." — Orenge01

13.

"'You always have to get the last word.' A statement made exclusively by people who are trying to have the last word, but are out of points." — ScruffyTuscaloosa

14.

"'I'm not talking about it anymore!' Yeah, because you know youre making absolutely no sense." — WRA1THLORD

15.

"Bringing up an entirely different topic. Whataboutism as they say." — TDeath21

16.

"When they start projecting. For example, they start accusing you of something that they're doing - like being bigoted. Or they start threatening to report or block you even though they're in the wrong." — HyperDogOwner458

17.

"You just always have to be right." — sugabeetus

Health

Psychologist explains why everyone feels exhausted right now and it makes so much sense

Psychologist Naomi Holdt beautifully explained what's behind the overarching exhaustion people are feeling and it makes perfect sense.

Photo by Jamie Street on Unsplash

It seems like most people are feeling wiped out these days. There's a reason for that.

We're about to wrap up year three of the COVID-19 pandemic, and it's been a weird ride, to say the least. These years have been hard, frustrating, confusing and tragic, and yet we keep on keeping on.

Except the keeping on part isn't quite as simple as it sounds. Despite the fact that COVID-19 is still wreaking havoc, we've sort of collectively decided to move on, come what may. This year has been an experiment in normalcy, but one without a testable hypothesis or clear design. And it's taken a toll. So many people are feeling tired, exhausted, worn thin ("like butter scraped over too much bread," as Bilbo Baggins put it) these days.

But why?

Keep ReadingShow less
Modern Families

My family just flew to three European countries and home again for $149 per person total

Here's how we traveled from the U.S. to London, Athens and Vienna and back again for less than the cost of one domestic flight.

Photo courtesy of Annie Reneau

My husband and kids sitting on Ted Lasso's bench in Richmond, U.K.

Our family of five just got back from a nearly 3-week European vacation—three different cities in three different countries—and we only paid $149 cash per person for all of our flights combined.

It sounds too good to be true, but it's not. It sounds like there's got to be a catch, and there is, but not like you might think.

Welcome to the world of travel hacking, where if you learn to play the points and miles game well, you can take vacations you (or at least I) never thought possible.

Keep ReadingShow less

All GIFs and images via Exposure Labs.


Photographer James Balog and his crew were hanging out near a glacier when their camera captured something extraordinary.

They were in Greenland, gathering footage from the time-lapse they'd positioned all around the Arctic Circle for the last several years.

Keep ReadingShow less
Family

Woman's rant to have less mom influencers on social media is so spot on

"Most of us are not living these aesthetic perfect lifestyles."

@elledotmo/TikTok

Woman calls for less mom influencers on TikTok

The curated perfection of social media—where every room, outfit and activity feel plucked straight out of a Pinterest board—can be a soothing escape from the messiness of real life.

But let’s face it—it’s easy to get oversaturated in this type of content. And after being constantly inundated with spotless kitchens and flawless faces and endless matcha-favoring morning routines, the aspirational easily becomes aggravating.

The rise of momfluencers can be a prime example of this. Sure, many mommy bloggers offer really helpful tips, product suggestions and doses of inspiration to their followers. But at the same time, they do push an ideal that doesn’t acknowledge the messy, chaotic reality that most moms experience everyday.

And that is exactly what one mom is fed up with.

Keep ReadingShow less
Joy

People share different thoughts on what makes someone a good friend

The responses show that we prioritize different things in our friendships.

Photo by Sam McNamara on Unsplash

Friendship is an important part of leading a fulfilling life.

According to an October 2023 Pew Research Center report, 61% of adults in the U.S. say that having close friends is an essential part of living a fulfilling life—a far higher percentage than those who say the same about being married (23%), having children (26%) or having a lot of money (24%). The research also found that having more friends is linked to being more satisfied with friendships in general. Approximately 81% of people with five or more close friends share they are "completely" or "very" satisfied with their friendships, while 65% of those with one to four close friends say the same.

But what does being satisfied with friendship even mean? What earns someone the label of "friend"? Or more importantly, what does it mean to be a good friend?

We asked our audience what makes someone a good friend, and the responses were interesting. Naturally, there were some common themes, but people also had some diverse ideas about what's important in a friendship.

Some people shared short, sweet lists of traits that are essential in a friendship:

"Caring, loyal, kind and completely non-judgemental." –Annika B.

"Trustworthy, loyal, supportive, flexible, patient, understanding. Caring." – Jonathan S.

"Kind, helpful, supportive and honest." – Marjorie M.

"Conversation and laughter. Kind and caring." – Kathleen M.

"Unconditional love, laughter, and honesty." – Molly H.

"When you are a better person with them than by yourself. And kindness ❤️" – Gillian N.

"They know how to really listen without judging." – Bernadette C.

two women sitting on a couch laughing

Friends laugh together.

Photo by Surface on Unsplash

Others offered a bit more detail:

"Being able to pick up where you left off even if some time has passed and it feels like no time has passed. Someone who will give you straight advice, but love you even if you don't follow it." – Melissa O.

"Someone you can talk honestly with, belly laugh with, but also just sit in silence with…knowing they just get you." – Lori T.

"Someone non judgemental who loves you even when you’ve struggled to love yourself. Someone who loves you unconditionally despite your flaws." – Sue H.

two people hugging

Friends comfort one another.

Photo by Priscilla Du Preez 🇨🇦 on Unsplash

"Kind, supportive, dependable, wants to spend time together, someone you can laugh and cry with. There on your important days, and in your time of need. And you have to be all those things for them in return." – Della D.

"They get you, allow you to be who you are, laugh with you, cry with you, no matter time or distance - you just pick up where you left off, they back you up - even when you’re not there to defend yourself." – Zan M.

"Honesty, kindness, understanding, ability to disagree without anger, trust, willing to tell each other hard truth with love, forgiveness." – Deborah H.

"They fill a need you have. There are many different kinds of friends. Childhood friends ,School friends, work friends, church friends etc...they all play a special role in your life." – Elizabeth B.

two women with their hands over each other's eyes

Friends don't judge.

Photo by Sam McNamara on Unsplash

And finally, some people offered specific details and personal anecdotes about their friendships:

"Sharing common interest and really caring about each other. listening is very important not just speaking to each other. My best friend of 60 years passed away a couple of years ago and I cannot tell you how much I miss her and her nonjudgmental friendship." – Carole J.

"Someone who supports you publicly and tells you hard truths privately, who cheerleads your successes and empathises your lows, who trusts you and you them. Who loves you flaws and all - but all of this you reciprocate in being a good friend. Time flies together and even after months apart you pick up like it was yesterday. Who you want to tell your big news too and your bad news too first." – Elsa P.

"Has great sense of humour, shared interests & values, compassionate, empathic, kind, doesn’t try to 'fix' me, doesn’t minimize my lived experiences as 'not so bad,' able to listen without judgment, and allows me to be there for them." – Linda H.

three older people walking arm in arm

Friends are there through thick and thin.

Photo by Philippe Leone on Unsplash

"I don’t know, sometimes they just love you, even when you don’t want them too. You have to acknowledge them, they don’t ask for anything just want to be with you. I have a 30 yr friendship because she didn’t give up on me. I came to realize she was more forgiving and accepted me for just me. She’s not too kind, sometimes selfish but she’s there, when you get older you also accept and understand no one is perfect and if you get mad at everyone you might wind up without friends we start dying off or in old age homes. We are who we are, just love each other flaws and all. Annoying things find a way to keep friendship, not awful bad things. You guys know what I mean." – Ney C.

"Someone who knows they can call you at 2 AM, and you can do the same. Someone you house and dog sit for, whose dogs come to greet you when they hear the garage door open and who happily sit on you. Someone that refused to let you pay for Lyft to get to chemotherapy appointments, but took you each time, checked on you afterwards, brought food knowing that you didn’t feel like cooking, visited to talk about all kinds of things, and just was there for you when you were feeling the considerable side effects of chemotherapy." – Yaca A.

We all need people in our lives we can depend on, share our joys and sorrows with, and support in return. And if we have a hard time making friends, we can always rely on the wisdom of preschoolers to remind us of the basic building blocks of friendship.

Internet

A story about 'lemon pie' is taking the internet by storm and leaving readers in tears

It might be fictional, but it's stirring up some real feelings.

@sappoop/TikTok, @finneyfrog/TikTok

Reader reacts to "lemon pie" story

There appears to be a growing trend on TikTok: heartbreaking slice-of-life stories, told as a slideshow. These usually mimic a text conversation between two people caught in a vulnerable moment, showcasing something quite moving and profound in the mundane.

Take for instance the “orange peel story” which went viral only a couple of weeks ago. It follows two college students post break-up, one of whom still has feelings for the other. A tender exchange encourages them to believe that they will find love again.

Now, there’s a new story making the rounds, and it’s every bit as touching.

Keep ReadingShow less