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Family

Man responds to family looking to reconnect after throwing him out of the house 37 years ago

At 16, they accused him of something he didn't do and left him on the streets.

families, abandonment, homelessness

A man contemplates how to respond to an email.


On March 16, 2024, Upworthy shared the story of a Redditor named Fancy-Anywhere-4733 (FA for short) who had an incredible dilemma: How do you respond to your family 37 years after they threw you out of the house as a 16-year-old for a bogus reason?

Now, he has shared his response, which is full of honesty, strength and grace.

First, here is some background (you can read the whole story here).

FA’s mother died when he was 12 years old and 2 years later, his father married a woman named Ashley with two kids, Mark (14) and Emily (12). “I got along with Ashley and Emily really well, but Mark, not so much so,” FA recalls. The following year, this rivalry came to a head when both boys fell for the same girl, Lisa, that FA began to date, much to Mark’s annoyance.


To get FA back for dating his crush, Mark planted some of Emily’s panties in his dresser drawer for his stepmother to find on laundry day.

broken family, upset teen, homeless teen

A distressed teen afraid of his future.

via Christian Erfurt/Unsplash

“I had no answer as I'd never seen [the underwear] before,” FA wrote. “Of course, no one believed me. No matter how much protesting I did." Mark added to the lies by saying that FA often stared at Emily and once said he wanted to marry her.

FA’s father threw him out of the house for being a "perv" and he was forced to live on the streets, doing whatever he could to get by. After decades of hard work he created a new life. He had a good job, was married with 4 kids and had finally found real happiness.

Recently, at the age of 53, his stepsister, Emily, whom he hadn’t spoken to in years, emailed him. Emily revealed that Mark got drunk and admitted that he set FA up and the news has been like a “bombshell” was dropped on the family.

“After sharing this revelation with Mom and Dad. Dad started crying, like really crying,” Emily wrote in the email. “I've never seen him cry before. I believe it because he has been carrying around a lot of guilt all these years. Obviously, now knowing the truth, he is now having to deal with the consqueses of his actions. However, after several hours of talking, we all came to the conclusion that we needed to find you and make amends. I have spent hours trying to locate you, in the hopes that I could reach out and extend a heartfelt apology for the years of misunderstanding and mistreatment and hurt.”

woman on computer, family fights, forgiveness

A woman writing an email late at night.

via Muzuno K/Pexels

Receiving the email was an incredible shock, and FA wasn’t sure whether he would respond at all. “I'm, however indifferent to the idea,” FA admitted. “Like, I have no ill feelings towards [Emily]. She obviously was young and had no real say in the matter. But with lots and lots of therapy, I learned to let go of that hate and anger and to let go of them. As well with all the love I receive from my wife, kids and in-laws, it's all I really need.”

FA received countless comments from people who suggested some ways to respond to the to the email. Two days later, he shared his response to Emily in a new post:

Dear Emily,

I appreciate you taking the time to reach out to me, but I must be honest with you. The years of pain and hurt caused by the lies and manipulation by Mark and the betrayal by Dad have left deep scars that will never be truly healed. While I understand that you are now aware of the truth and are genuinely sorry for what has transpired, I find it difficult to simply forgive and forget.

The betrayal and abandonment I experienced at the hands of my own family have left me with a sense of distrust and resentment that can never be overcome. The damage that has been done has impacted me in ways that you may never ever fully and truly understand, and the idea of trying to reconcile now feels like an insurmountable task.

I have spent years in therapy trying to come to terms with the pain and deep trauma I endured, and I have worked hard to build a wonderful life for myself that does not rely on the presence or approval of those who turned their backs on me.

While I am grateful for the apology and the newfound awareness of the truth, I do not feel compelled to rekindle a relationship that was built on lies, deception and betrayal. Especially after all these years.

I have found peace and closure in distancing myself from those who caused me harm, and I do not see the need to reopen old wounds in the name of reconciliation. While I believe in the power of forgiveness, that isn't something I can give.

I wish you all the best in your life, I really do, but I must prioritize my emotional health and self-preservation above all else. I hope you can respect my decision and understand that the wounds of the past will take a lifetime to heal. I would appreciate if you pass this fact on to the others and please don't reach out again. I must look to my future and not my past.

Sincerely, [FA]

email, man writing, family drama

A man writes an email on his laptop

via Christian Hume/Unsplash

"This is a good response. You are letting them know that the door is closed, and you didn't give them any information on whether you have a family," Primierofilho wrote in the comments. "That’s (one of) my favorite parts of [FA's] beautifully eloquent reply. By denying his ex-family any information of how he is doing, they don’t get to know which way to turn their feelings," Darkstormchaser added.

One of the most powerful parts of FA’s letter is the clear reason why he will never be able to forgive them. Even though he believes in forgiveness, doing so would unravel a lot of the work he’s done to heal after the incredible, nearly insurmountable pain they have caused him.

Forgiveness was simply a bridge too far and FA should be proud that he drew up clear boundaries with his family. There was no reason why he should trade an ounce of his peace of mind in exchange for giving solace to those who abandoned him as a teen.

Wheel of Fortune/Youtube

That was quite impressive.

Listen, while we all love a hilarious Wheel of Fortune fail, watching an epic win can be just as entertaining. And that’s exactly what recently happened on The Wheel when a contestant named Traci Demus-Gamble made a winning puzzle solve so out-of-nowhere that it made host Ryan Seacrest jokingly check her for a hidden earpiece.

In a clip posted to the show’s YouTube account Friday, Jan. 17, Demus-Gamble waved to her husband who was standing on the sidelines before going up to the stage for her next challenge: guess a four-word “phrase.”

Demus-Gamble wasn’t off to a great start, as only two of her given letters (“T” and “E”) made it to the board. And the odds didn’t improve much after Demus-Gamble, admittedly “nervous,” gave the letters “M,” “C,” “D,” and “O” and only two of those letters showed up once on the board.

“Again, not too much more, but who knows, you’ve had a lot of good luck tonight,” Seacrest said. “Maybe it’ll strike you.”

Then, all in under ten seconds (more like in 1.5 seconds), Demus-Gamble correctly guessed, “They go way back” like it was nothing.

Watch the incredible moment below:

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

"How in the world did you solve that last one?" Seacrest asked.

"I just dug deep, I dug deep," Demus-Gamble said.

Yeah, you dug real deep," Seacrest replied. "Congratulations, great, great work."

“Now THAT was an amazing solve.”

“Wow! That was impressive!”

“I couldn't solve that one to save my life, but Demus-Gamble got it like it was nothing.”

“There's only one way to describe this to me: 😦”

At the end of the clip, Seacrest opened the envelope to reveal that Demus-Gamble’s puzzle solve won her $50,000, earning her a total win of $78,650. Certainly not chump change.

As for her winning strategy—Demus-Gamble assured no cheating was involved. “I just dug deep," she told Seacrest. We’ll say.

This article originally appeared in January

Service dogs deserve vacations, too.

Service dogs are professionals who are trained to be attentive, helpful and extremely well-behaved for their owners who rely on them for everyday living. They aren't easily distracted and have solid control over their impulses because their job performance is vital to humans who need them. No one wants a service dog going rogue.

But underneath all of that self-control and professionalism, service dogs are still dogs, as an adorable reunion on a Disney cruise ship makes delightfully clear.

Ashton McGrady is a content creator who shares her adventures with her Golden Retriever service dog, Forest, who has an affinity for Disney characters. In one video, she shows Forest choosing his own stuffy at a Disney gift shop, even putting the money on the counter to pay for it himself. But another video of Forest being reunited with his favorite character, Pluto, has people the world over feeling his joy vicariously.

Watch:

@radiantlygolden

proof that distance won’t keep the very best of friends apart ❤️🚢✨ we love you pluto!!! #servicedog #servicedogteam #disneytiktok #disneycruiseline #disneycruise #hostedbydisney

Ashton calls Forest her "best pal and lifesaver," and it's clear from her videos that they make a great team. People loved seeing the good doggo get to let loose and enjoy a romp with Pluto and how the cast member interacted with him as well.

"Those dogs are such good pups and work so hard to keep their owners safe, it’s nice to see them play for a bit ❤️"

"This is the most golden retriever golden I’ve ever seen 🥰🥰🥰"

"i just know the actor under the costume was having the best day ever."

"DID PLUTO WAG HIS OWN TAIL??? This is the best thing I’ve seen all day"

"It's like the Disney hug rule applies to dogs...but it's play with them until they are done."

The "Disney hug rule" referenced here is an apparently unofficial "rule" that DIsney cast members when dressed in character don't end a child's hug until the child let's go—basically letting the child hug the character as long as they want to. It's not an actual rule, but it's a thoughtful practice some cast members use to make sure their young guests don't leave a character meet disappointed.

For Forest, the equivalent is playing until he (or his owner—he's on the job, after all) decides he's done.

This isn't the first time Forest has had a touching reunion with Pluto. Ashton shared another video with a similar interaction—it's clear that Pluto truly is Forest's bestie.

@radiantlygolden

I just want to go back to this moment 🥹 if you’re friends with pluto and you see this, you made our entire day ♥️ #waltdisneyworld #wdw50 #epcotfestivalofthearts #festivalofthearts #epcot #charactermeetandgreet #disneytiktok #distok #servicedog #servicedogteam #servicedogsatdisney


Ashton also uses social media to educate people about service dogs, as there are a lot of misunderstandings out there about what service animals are, how they work, and where they are allowed to be.

Though service dogs and their owners will often naturally form a bond, a service dog is not a pet; it's a working animal that assists a person with disabilities or health conditions. In fact, service animals are considered medical equipment, in the same category as a wheelchair or an oxygen tank, and they are allowed to go anywhere the person they are serving would normally be allowed to go—even if other animals are not allowed. As the Americans with Disabilities Act website states: "Under the ADA, State and local governments, businesses, and nonprofit organizations that serve the public generally must allow service animals to accompany people with disabilities in all areas of the facility where the public is allowed to go."

Service dogs are sometimes confused with emotional support animals, but they are not the same thing. Service animals are trained to do specific tasks related to mitigating a person's disability, which could range from recognizing when their owner is needing medical attention to reminding them to take a medication to guiding them around an obstacle or across a street.

@radiantlygolden

If a business is not pet-friendly, they may only ask these TWO questions! note: “emotional support” is NOT considered a valid answer to question 2. thank you @Disney Parks for this great example of how it should be done. #servicedog #servicedoglife #servicedogteam #disabilitytiktok #disneyparks

There are some guidelines and laws that govern how the general public as well as private businesses should interact with service animals. First, no one should pet a service animal unless their handler specifically invites them to. Second, there are only two questions a business owner or their staff members are allowed to ask a person with a service dog: 1) Is the dog a service animal who is required because of a disability? And 2) What work or task has the dog been trained to perform? They are not allowed to ask for documentation, ask what disability the person has or ask that the dog demonstrate what they can do.

For people who need them, service animals like Forest are a vital part of living a full life. They are also working professionals who deserve a break now and then, so it's fun to see this good doggo having the time of his life with his buddy, Pluto.

You can follow Ashton on TikTok and YouTube.

This article originally appeared in January

Diane Tirado/Facebook

Left: Teacher Diane Tirado. Right: The note she left for students after being fired.

If you're of the mind that kids today are being coddled and not properly prepared for the real world, well, you might want to buckle up for this one. The story out of a public school in Florida has parents and teachers alike up in arms.

A Florida teacher was fired for giving her students zeros for missing assignments. Diane Tirado has been a teacher for years. Most recently, she was an eighth-grade history teacher at Westgate K-8 School in Port St. Lucie, Florida. Diane recently gave her students two weeks to complete an Explorer notebook project, but several students simply didn't hand it in. Since there was zero work done, Diane gave them zeros.

She got fired for it.

schools, teachers, education, grades, students, parentsMichael Scott from The Office saying "What?"Giphy

The elementary school has a rule called the “no zero policy."

The lowest possible grade that teachers can give students is a 50, even if they don't turn anything in. That means that an extremely poor completed assignment is worth the same number of points as no assignment at all.

Hardly seems fair, right? Westgate is far from the only school that has such a policy, however.

whiteboard, education, classroom, teacher, middle school, 8th grade A message written on the whiteboard for her students after Diane Tirado was firedDiane Tirado/Facebook

It's a rule that Diane, unsurprisingly, does not agree with. After she was fired for disobeying, she left her students a charming goodbye message on the whiteboard.

"Bye kids. Mrs. Tirado loves you and wishes you the best in life. I have been fired for refusing to give you a 50 percent for not handing anything in. Love, Mrs. Tirado"

The scale, as outlined by the school, reads as follows:

A = 90 to 100
B = 80 to 89
C = 70-79
D = 60-69
F = 50-59

Diane later shared the story on Facebook, hoping to spread awareness about the school's policy.

“A grade in Mrs. Tirado's class is earned," she said.

“I'm so upset because we have a nation of kids that are expecting to get paid and live their life just for showing up and it's not real."

Diane's post has gone viral, and most commenters agree with her position – it's not fair to hand out grades for work that doesn't exist.

No zero policies are common in many schools, and teachers notoriouslyhate them. But it's at least worth considering why they exist. Some educators say it's because when a student earns a zero, it's very difficult for them to ever recover their grade in that class. In other words, it may be too harsh. Others argue that, if you don't want a zero, don't turn in nothing! Getting an earned-zero is a great way to learn to at least try.

A follow up statement from the school stated: "Ms. Tirado was released from her duties as an instructor because her performance was deemed sub-standard and her interactions with students, staff, and parents lacked professionalism and created a toxic culture on the school’s campus. ... During her brief time of employment at West Gate, the school fielded numerous student and parent complaints as well as concerns from colleagues. Based on new information shared with school administrators, an investigation of possible physical abuse is underway."

However, school representatives did not deny the existence of the no zero policy, and Tirado claims the school engaged in a smear campaign after she became a "whistleblower" on their policies. She's currently considering legal action against the district.

Still, the debate over the grading policy rages on.

“The reason I took on this fight was because it was ridiculous. Teaching should not be this hard," Diane said.

This article originally appeared 6 years ago.

Pets

London man finds a mysterious egg, incubates it, and launches a Pixar-worthy journey of love

When Riyadh found an abandoned egg, he had no idea that it would change his life.

Courtesy of Riyadh Khalaf/Instagram (used with permission)

When Riyadh found an egg, he had no idea how much it would change his life.

The story of Riyadh and Spike starts like the opening to a children's book: "One day, a man was walking along and spotted a lone egg where an egg should not have been…" And between that beginning and the story's mostly sweet ending is a beautiful journey of curiosity, care, and connection that has captivated people all over the world.

Irish author Riyadh Khalaf was out walking in Devon, England, when he came upon an egg. "We just found what we think is a duck egg," Riyadh says in a video showing the milky white egg sitting in a pile of dirt. "Just sitting here on its own. No nest. No other eggs."

Thinking there was no way it was going to survive on its own, Riyadh put the egg in a paper cup cushioned with a napkin and took it home to London, which entailed two car rides, a hotel stay, a train ride, a tube ride, and a bus ride. He said he used to breed chickens and pigeons, so he had some experience with birds. Knowing the egg could survive for a while in a dormant state, he ordered an incubator on Amazon, and the journey to see if the egg was viable began.


Even though it was "just an egg," Riyadh quickly became attached, and once it showed signs of life he took on the role of "duck dad." Every day, the egg showed a drastic change in development, and Riyadh's giddy joy at each new discovery—movement, a discernible eye, a beak outline—was palpable. He devoured information on ducks to learn as much as he could about the baby he was (hopefully) about to hatch and care for.

Finally, 28 days later, the shell of the egg began to crack. "I could see this very clear outline of the most gorgeous little round bill," Riyadh said—confirmation that it was, indeed, a duck as he had suspected. But duckling hatching is a process, and one they have to do it on their own. Ducklings instinctively know to turn the egg as it hatches so that the umbilical cord detaches, and the whole process can take up to 48 hours. Riyadh watched and monitored until he finally fell asleep, but at 4:51am, 29 hours after the egg had started to hatch, he awakened to the sound of tweets.

"There was just this little wet alien staring back at me," he said. "It was love at first sight."

Riyadh named his rescue duckling Spike. Once Spike was ready to leave the incubator, he moved into "Duckingham Palace," a setup with all of the things he would need to grow into a healthy, self-sufficient duck—including things that contribute to his mental health. (Apparently ducklings can die from poor mental health, which can happen when they don't have other ducks to interact with—who knew?)

"My son shall not only survive, but he shall thrive!" declared the proud papa.

Riyadh knew it would be impossible for Spike to not imprint on him somewhat, but he didn't want him to see him as his mother. Riyadh set up mirrors so that Spike could see another duckling (even though it was just himself) and used a surrogate stuffed duck to teach him how to do things like eat food with his beak. He used a duck whistle and hid his face from Spike while feeding him, and he played duck sounds on his computer to accustom Spike to the sounds of his species.

"It's just such a fulfilling process to watch a small being learn," said Riyadh.

As Spike grew, Riyadh took him to the park to get him accustomed to the outdoors and gave him opportunities to swim in a small bath. He learned to forage and do all the things a duck needs to do. Throughout, Riyadh made sure that Spike was getting the proper balanced nutrition he needed as well. Check this out:


After 89 days, the day finally came for Spike to leave Riyadh's care and be integrated into a community of his kind "to learn how to properly be a duck." A rehabilitation center welcomed him in and he joined a flock in an open-air facility where he would be able to choose whether to stay or to leave once he became accustomed to flying. Within a few weeks of being at the rehabilitation center, his signature mallard colors developed, marking his transition from adolescence. Spike has been thriving with his flock, and Riyadh was even able to share video of his first flight.

This is the where "And they all lived happily ever after" would be a fitting end to the story, but unfortunately, Spike and his fowl friends are living in trying times. The rehabilitation center was notified by the U.K. government in December of 2024 that the duck flock needed to be kept indoors for the time being to protect them from a bird flu outbreak and keep it from spreading.

Building an entire building for a flock of ducks is not a simple or cheap task, so Riyadh called on his community of "daunties" and "duncles" who had been following Spike's story to help with a fundraiser to build a "Duckingham Palace" for the whole flock. Riyadh's followers quickly raised over £11,000, which made a huge difference for the center's owners to be able to protect Spike and his friends.

All in all, Riyadh and Spike's story is a testament to what can happen when people genuinely care. If Riyadh had left that egg where it was, it may not have made it. If Spike hadn't survived and been moved to the rehab center, the ducks there would be in greater danger of the bird flu due to the costs of building an indoor shelter for them. Despite the ongoing bird flu threat, the story really does have a happy ending.

Thank to Riyadh for sharing Spike's journey with us. (You can follow Riyadh on Instagram here.)

This article originally appeared in January.

@bunchesofbeggs/TikTok

This Manager think PTO is for vacation, not "life changing events."

What does it take to be a good boss? You can answer this a bajillion different ways—being a clear communicator, earning employee trust, providing constructive feedback, and fostering a positive and supportive work environment while also being open to feedback and recognizing your team's contributions—but really, it all seems to stem from respecting your employees as fellow human beings.

And part of that means acknowledging that these employees have lives that are, frankly, more important to them than the job, and not penalizing them for it. One manager, and Gen Zer no less, seems to fully understand this basic principle, and folks are applauding her for it.

Elizabeth Beggs, who manages a five-person team for a packaging distribution company in Virginia, recently made a TikTok sharing which time-off requests she “rejects.”You’ll see why “rejects” is in quotes shortly.

One example: when a female rep notified Beggs that she was likely having a miscarriage. After the team member asked how she can file for time off to see to the issue, Beggs immediately responded, “Girl, go to the doctor! We’re not submitting time off for that!”

In Beggs’ mind, PTO is for “vacation,” not medical emergencies. What a concept.

@bunchesofbeggs Edited to clarify- 1. My team is all salary. 2. These examples are not all recent or from my current position. 3. My team works hard and hits thier KPIs above and beyond. Time off is meant to recharge and be used how you need it, not to handle life changing events #mangers #corporate #genzmanagers #sales #vetstocorporate #veterans ♬ original sound - Elizabeth


Beggs went on to explain a couple more situations, like when a parent who was “up all night” with a sick kid. And her last one wasn’t even negative—she had an employee who wanted to work a half-day to do something nice for their anniversary.

“Seriously, if any of these triggered anyone, then you need to evaluate how you run your team as a manager,” she concluded.

By and large, the response to Beggs’ management style has been overwhelmingly positive, and people seem to find it completely refreshing.

“You are not a manager, you’re a LEADER,” one person wrote.

@bunchesofbeggs Everything you do should be to better your team, not to make your life easier #leadership #ownership #corporatelife #veteran #military ♬ original sound - Elizabeth

Another said,“The better you treat your employees, the more loyal they will be and the better work they will put out. Most people do not understand how management works.”

A few noted how this attitude seems to be more present among younger leaders.

One person commented, "millennial manager here. My team members are human first, employees second. Like just go do what you want but get the work done too.”

Another joked that “Boomer managers could NEVER.”

Beggs would later clarify this doesn’t mean she doesn't have clear productivity expectations for her team (who work on salary). Perhaps if she had a team member not making their KPIs (key performance indicator), there would be an additional conversation surrounding time off, but there is still an inherent respect as a fellow human being. Which, to her, means treating bona fide time- off as a way to “recharge and be used how you need it, not to handle life changing events.”

@bunchesofbeggs If you’re planning does not account for people being human- it’s bad planning #genzleaders #armyvet #militaryvet #genz #corporatelife #corporate #manager #timeoff ♬ original sound - Elizabeth

Younger generations might get labeled “lazy” or “entitled,” but they are also the ones fighting to change the status quo, so that we all may be treated less like cogs in the machine, and more like actual human beings. Its leaders like Beggs who show that operating in new ways doesn't compromise productivity, and in fact enhances it. We might not be able to change the global standard overnight, but we certainly aren’t going to get to a better place without leaders who choose to serve their community rather than a bottom line.