Motherhood

Women in the United States are having kids later in life. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, the average age for women becoming first time moms rose from 26.6 years in 2016 to 27.5 years in 2023.

Pregnancy at 35 and older was once referred to as a "geriatric" pregnancy. Now, they are now referred to as "advanced maternal age" pregnancy.

On Reddit, moms who had kids from the ages of 38 to 43 shared their raw and real experiences being pregnant at an older age. While some moms shared their experiences as first time moms, others offered their experience welcoming another baby into a growing brood later in life.

And these moms did not sugar coat their experiences. These are 12 real-life stories from older women who had babies from 38 to 43.

"I had my son at 43. I am tired and my knees hurt. My hair all fell out and I went into perimenopause as soon as I stopped breastfeeding. I have finally accepted I’m old and squishy and it’s only going to get worse. On the other hand I am so much more patient and compassionate compared to even my 30s so I find joy in parenting I wouldn’t have in my younger years. I get tears in my eyes cooking dinner or doing preschool drop off because it’s so freaking special to have this kid of mine and my happy little family. I also know I have a lot of life experience to bring to the table compared to younger moms." - TheLowFlyingBirds

"It was much harder getting and staying pregnant with my 3rd at 38. I also found that the older my kids were getting, the harder it was to imagine “staring over”. They really become so much easier. But my gosh that 3rd baby is just the best thing ever. Makes me want a fourth!" - bluewind_greywave

"I’m tired but I have no idea if I’m more tired than anyone else. It’s fine. Do it if you want. Just think about fertility issues as time goes on. Otherwise, just wait. You’ll be fine." - Key-Trips

"Had my 2 at 39 and 41. They are 6 and 4 now. Sure, we are exhausted, but they also keep us young in a way. We have to go out and do more." - gussie0422

"I’ve had kids in my 20’s, 30’s and 40’s. Look, there are pluses and minuses to each age, but it’s harder in your 40’s than your 30’s. I mean, it’s kinda obvious; caring for infants and toddlers is physically demanding and you’re not the person you used to be in your 40’s. Recovery takes longer, sleep is more precious, illnesses can be harder to shake. That doesn’t mean it isn’t worth it. Just don’t go in with rose-colored glasses." - Sundaes_in_October

"I had my two at 38 and 40. Am I tired? Yeah. But i might be tired anyway and I still manage to have a job and cook dinner and work out and stuff. Literally nothing else though. If I were younger and richer I’d be going for a third." - imstillok

"I had one at 30 and one at 38 (secondary infertility) - even though I wouldn't change it or give him back, I could never have another one. He has Autism - not even profound - just Level 1, but it's still really hard - I am so exhausted all the time. It takes everything I have to be a functioning mother and most of the time I feel like I'm failing because of my extreme exhaustion. If I were younger, maybe I would take the gamble having another kid, but knowing that the quality of your eggs only deteriorates as your age, I would just have to to assume that any other kids I have would most likely have some sort of special need or neurodivergence, and I am already too tapped out. I definitely don't mean to sound like a downer, but I just wanted to give you a perspective on what it can look like." - The-Housewitch

"I had one at 37 and one at 40. The second pregnancy was definitely tougher due to my age. It didn’t seem to me that it should be that different but it was. If you do choose to go that route, be aware that you need a lot more observation and things can definitely get dicier." - badadvicefromaspider

"I had one kid at 37 and another at 38. I’m exhausted. My bones hurt. But I love the kiddos so much I’d do it again." - Great-Mediocrity81

"Just bear this in mind; having kids later in life you could face the possibility of going through menopause at the same time your teens are going through puberty. Happened to us. It's a doozy." - brockclan216

"It really depends on your health. Pregnancy, birth and new born phase has been fine for me over 40. But I have an autoimmune disorder which has been many times more painful and exhausting. I’m sure parenthood differs at every age but a lot depends on the individual. My 80 year old MIL can get on the ground and play. I couldn’t at 35. She would likely lose her temper at a toddler, I wouldn’t. If you are able to, and want to, age by itself isn’t an issue. Get a good Ob who monitors you closely as over 35 is high risk due to AMA. I personally prefer more motoring as pregnancy can go from low risk to high risk quickly. The biggest issue is genetic disorders but you can screen for those." - heatdeathtoall

"I got pregnant (accidentally) with my first child and gave birth at 38. I'd say overall it wasn't terrible. I ended up with some heart problems and baby never read well on NSTs towards the end of pregnancy which made it stressful. But I had no morning sickness. Just a lot of fatigue the first trimester. Baby is 8 months old and I imagine it took me longer to recover from my C-section than if I'd had it 10 years ago but even at that it wasn't terrible. Another plus to being older was I got more scans so that was nice, but of course more appts and more time. I think my biggest hang-up with being an older parent is I feel like I won't get to be around as long as being a younger parent and also giving her a sibling may be out of the question but I almost feel like it needs to happen so she isn't alone someday. Morbid, sure. But I've clearly thought about the future. Overall I have no regrets aside from it not happening even just a big sooner. I'm at a good place in life. I feel ready to teach her and guide her through life and more than that I just feel capable of doing those things well." - MilkyMama4U