gen x vs millennials

Parenting styles are always changing from generation to generation. And Gen Xers are taking note about how vastly different their parents' (from the Silent Generation and Baby Boomers) style of parenting differs from Millennials.

One Gen Xer shared, "Something I’ve noticed the last 10 years or so is how much parents are constantly 'doing' something with their kids all summer. I have a few friends that are much younger and have children of all ages. It seems like everyday they are going to the zoo, going to the park, going to a museum, waterpark, taking them horseback riding etc. It never stops."

After explaining the observation, they continued, "I just remember being a kid and playing outside all summer and maybe doing 1-2 things all summer. Do kids really need this much constant stimulation? Please correct me if I’m wrong. It just seems like A LOT."

Many Gen Xers agreed, and explained the value in giving their kids space growing up. "My kids are older now, but when they were young, I tried to do a combo of unstructured time and fun activities in the summers. We'd have a few days of unstructured time in a row, then hit a museum or water park or something to break it up. I think they both have value," one wrote.

And another Gen Xer added, "It’s not an all or nothing thing. Being around your kids 24/7 so they get smothered and never learn to make their own decisions is bad but our parents basically ignoring us all the time was just as bad. There’s a pretty large happy medium where you hang out with your kids sometimes while in other times you leave them to their own devices."

The post garnered further reaction, and healthy debate. Other Gen Xers disagreed, noting their parents could have been more involved with them growing up.

One Gen Xer explained how their parents' hands-off style influenced theirs to be completely different. "We were also just kinda generally neglected. Like, I was in Little League in the summer, but I had to ride my BMX bike like 45 minutes to get to practice, and I for sure had to make lunch for myself before I left home. I suspect that part of what’s going on now is a reaction to that," they wrote.

Some Millennials also shared that they intentionally don't overstimulate their kids. "This has not at all been my parenting style. To take it even further, I feel doing so is ultimately a disservice to the kids, no matter how well intended. Too many children have become dependent on constant outside stimulation," one wrote. "Too many kids are too damn busy. Learning to amuse yourself is a life skill, and parents ought to be encouraging it. Let them just be once in awhile, especially on their Summer break."

However, other Millennials defended their more 'involved' parenting style proudly. "I read that on average working mothers today spend more direct time with their children than stay-at-home mothers did in the 1970s. That was pretty telling to me. ETA: My point being that parents in our generation in general probably spend more time with children," one shared. And another added, "My father once bragged to me he had never changed a diaper. It was not the flex he thought it was."

One Millennial parent summarized their parenting style succinctly: "I think it's because Millennial parents see their kids as human beings and not just something they had to make and raise cause society told them to."