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Mom comes out to her 7-year-old as a sexual assault survivor. The discomfort was worth it.

Sometimes speaking our truth can help history from repeating itself.

sa, sexual assault

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Almost all the important conversations are uncomfortable

Sarah Shanley Hope's story is frighteningly common.

As a kid, she went over to her neighbor's house one day to play with her best friend. While there, her friend's older brother sexually assaulted both of them.

Hope was only 6 years old.

Being so young, she didn't know how to verbalize what happened or how to process it. She carried the pain with her for years, until she had daughters of her own.

two women hugging each otherPhoto by Eye for Ebony on Unsplash

She told her own girls from the beginning, "You're in charge of your body." But at times, the message seemed to ring hollow.

Mostly, Hope recalls her older daughter, now 8, rolling her eyes, having heard the refrain so many times before: "There goes mom being overprotective, again."

But one day Hope got a call from school. A boy in the class had been caught inappropriately touching some of the girls. Her own daughter had even had a run-in with him.

"He kept hanging on me even after I said 'stop'! It was so annoying," Hope recalls her daughter saying.

Hope decided that, finally, it was time to tell her daughter her own story — her own "Me Too" moment.

"I finally said, honey, the reason I'm paying such close attention to this is that mommy had an experience when I was a kid, where someone did something to my body that wasn't OK."

"I don’t want you to feel badly inside like I did," she continued, according to her impassioned post on Medium. "I want you to know that we can always talk about the hard and confusing stuff.”

An uncomfortable but, sadly, necessary conversation. You can watch what happens next in the video below:

Why She Told Her 7-Year-Old Daughter About Her Own MeToo Story?

7 might seem like a very young age to tackle such a weighty conversation. But it might be necessary even earlier than that.

The National Center for Victims of Crime estimates that 20% of women (and 5-10% of men) recall an incident of sexual abuse as a child, with kids between 7 and 13 being the most vulnerable.

Those are horrifying statistics for any parent, so horrifying that we might wish we could be with our kids every second of the day to protect them from the horrors of the world. But we can't.

The best we can do is make sure they are aware of the danger and armed with knowledge about what to do if they need help. That includes direct talks — like the ones Hope has had with her kids — and modeling proper boundaries in our own lives.

In Hope's case, sharing her story has triggered a wave of positive change in her own community. She says several of her parent friends have called her recently for advice about how to have these conversations with their kids of all ages. And that's definitely something we need more of.

"We can’t undo the harm," Hope writes. "What we can do is choose discomfort over hiding from the pain — or worse, repeating it."

This story originally appeared on 01.26.18

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Transforming Spaces: Expand Furniture's space-saving wonders are redefining living areas

Expand your living space with these ingenious furniture solutions for modern homes

In today's world, where urban dwellings are increasingly compact, maximizing limited living space has never been more pressing. Enter Expand Furniture, a trailblazer transforming tight quarters into versatile, stylish living areas.

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The Junior Giant Table

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Imagine a sleek console table, quietly sitting in your cozy studio apartment, that magically transforms into a grand dining table fit for a family feast. This isn't a scene from a futuristic movie—it's the Junior Giant Table from Expand Furniture.

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But here's the real magic: the MurphySofa Migliore is a perfect companion to Murphy beds, making it a space-saving superhero. Imagine transforming your living room into a bedroom without the usual furniture shuffle. This sofa gracefully slides or folds away, harmonizing with the Murphy bed to optimize your space without compromising style or comfort.

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In a world where every square inch counts, the MurphySofa Migliore isn't just furniture—it's a lifestyle upgrade.

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Step into a world where a bookcase spins into a bed, and a table emerges like a scene from a modern-day fairy tale. This isn't just clever design; it's the Compatto – Wall Bed Revolving Bookcase Table from Expand Furniture, a triumph of multifunctionality in interior design.

The Compatto is an alchemist in the furniture world, seamlessly transitioning from a chic bookcase to a cozy bed to a functional table. This ingenious piece doesn't just save space; it redefines it. Your books and cherished keepsakes have a stylish home on their shelves, and when the night falls, a comfortable bed folds down, welcoming a restful sleep. In the morning, it transforms again, offering a table space for your coffee or laptop.

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