People listed everything from kitchen quirks to mind boggling sleep habits.
No relationship remains unchanged after moving in together. This is the chapter where you learn about your significant other’s truest self, in many ways—their habits, ticks, how they manage chores and money, their sleep patterns, their level of tidiness, their communication style, how they handle conflict, etc. The good, the bad, and yes, the ugly.
And while having these revelations can end a relationship, it’s also a milestone that helps endear our partners to us, and helps both partners connect on a deeper level. Some initial anxiety can lead to wholehearted commitment…with maybe even a few laughs along the way.
Recently, folks online decided to open up about their own personal discoveries they made about their other half after moving in together, and boy are these stories entertaining, not to mention relatable. Read along for a good chuckle, and to remind yourself that if you live with a sweetheart (and their peculiarities) you are not alone.
“He will occasionally (usually when I'm not around to be appalled) eat dry tortellini straight out of the bag when he's reading in bed. Dry. Tortellini.”
“We were fixing to watch a movie and he wanted popcorn. He said ‘too bad we don’t have any lettuce.’ I asked if he wanted a salad, he said ‘No, I want popcorn and lettuce.’ He said he never said anything at the movie theater because he always knows they never have lettuce. The man eats bites of lettuce and popcorn together. His whole family does.”
“She doesn't fully close cabinets or lids. She'll leave out a jar of anything (jelly, peanut butter, etc) and give the lid a quarter turn then call it a day.”
“In the middle of the night I will wake up to him having both of his arms straight in the air like a damn zombie. If I lay too close to him when he does this I get a surprise mammogram when he inevitably drops his arms down.”
“He set tons of alarms, but none actually wake him up.”
“While I'm cooking, he insists on opening the goddamn oven MULTIPLE TIMES to check if it's ready. Makes me homicidal.”
“My partner secretly freaks out whenever I'm cooking and the stove is set any higher than medium-low. if i walk away for more than one second, he would turn it down and not say anything.”
“My boyfriend sleep talks, yells, sings, and laughs. I’ve woken up in a panic thinking someone was breaking in because he had yelled at the top of his lungs “WTF ARE YOU DOING HERE” just to look over seconds later and see him with his eyes closed and mouth wide open 💀”
“How every single cup of coffee is left 1/4 full around the apartment.”
“He sleeps like a vampire; sleeping on his back, with his arms straight by his sides or folded on his chest. Every. Single. Night. Some nights he doesn’t even change his position at all. I was seriously concerned during the first couple of nights we slept in the same bed.”
“He completely undresses before going to the bathroom to poop.”
“Evidently there is a right way and a wrong way to fold towels.”
“I always thought that when movies or TV shows feature someone talking in their sleep, and they just spout random, silly nonsense, that it was mostly for comedic effect and wasn’t really a reflection of real life. Nope. My partner talks in his sleep and it’s always just absolute random, silly nonsense. The most recent one was, in a tone of dismay; ‘There’s ice cream all over the stairs…’ followed by a drawn out ‘broooooooo.’ He also just periodically giggles in his sleep, which, frankly, is one of the most adorable things I’ve ever seen from another human.
“He wanted to put all the cutlery just straight into a drawer without any divides between knives, forks and spoons. Just... All in there in a mess.”
“My ex slept with his eyes slightly open. The first night I thought he died. The second night I almost performed an exorcism.”
“She is capable of reversing her sleep schedule as needed. I've had the same sleep schedule for decades and she just... makes up new ones when needed.”
“He wakes up every night to find something to eat from the fridge while half asleep.. And drops food all the way from the fridge back to bed. And sometimes leaves cutlery in the fridge.”
“She eats Oreos by taking a tall glass and filling it about three quarters full of the cookies then she fills the glass with milk. She then waits about 5-10 minutes, stirs it all into a slurry and eats it like soup.”
“She doesn’t talk in her sleep but she hums. Sometimes I can make out the tune. Last night it was Pink Pony Club.”
“Socks. All over the place.”
“She rarely wears clothes, she's the naked neighbor, and now so am I.”
And then, sometimes it’s about being surprised by the sense of peace our partners bring us. This can be especially true for those that come from traumatic living situations. It can be just as much of an adjustment to simply have a drama-free home.
“How unbelievably, and almost uniquely, normal she is.She has no drama. No family issues. No trauma induced fetishes. She likes Superman and loves people for who they are. She’s mild mannered and kind. Loves animals. Like she has ZERO crazy. We’ve never raised our voices to one another in 9 years together.Coming from 30 years of chaotic relationships, it’s still a little unsettling to me sometimes. Like we’ve been married 7 years now and I still wait for the crazy to pop up, but there very well may just not be any. She’s the definition of a breath of fresh air. Every day.”
- Intimacy coach debunks myth about couples who post too much about themselves on social media ›
- A growing number of married Americans are together but live in separate homes. Here's why. ›
- Couples sleeping in separate beds Articles and News - Upworthy ›
- Dad of 2 young kids admits he and his wife sleep separately - Upworthy ›
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There's a reason why some people can perfectly copy accents, and others can't
Turns out, there's a neurodivergent link.
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Have you ever had that friend who goes on vacation for four days to London and comes back with a full-on Queen's English posh accent? "Oooh I left my brolly in the loo," they say, and you respond, "But you're from Colorado!" Well, there are reasons they (and many of us) do that, and usually it's on a pretty subconscious level.
It's called "accent mirroring," and it's actually quite common with people who are neurodivergent, particularly those with ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder). According Neurolaunch, the self-described "Free Mental Health Library," "Accent mirroring, also known as accent adaptation or phonetic convergence, is the tendency to unconsciously adopt the accent or speech patterns of those around us. This linguistic chameleon effect is not unique to individuals with ADHD, but it appears to be more pronounced and frequent in this population."
Essentially, when people have conversations, we're constantly "scanning" for information—not just the words we're absorbing, but the inflection and tone. "When we hear an accent, our brains automatically analyze and categorize the phonetic features, prosody, and intonation patterns," writes Neurolaunch. For most, this does result in copying the accent of the person with whom we're speaking. But those with ADHD might be more sensitive to auditory cues. This, "coupled with a reduced ability to filter out or inhibit the impulse to mimic…could potentially explain the increased tendency for accent mirroring."
While the article explains further research is needed, they distinctly state that, "Accent mirroring in individuals with ADHD often manifests as an unconscious mimicry of accents in social situations. This can range from subtle shifts in pronunciation to more noticeable changes in intonation and speech rhythm. For example, a person with ADHD might find themselves unconsciously adopting a Southern drawl when conversing with someone from Texas, even if they’ve never lived in the South themselves."
People are having their say online. On the subreddit r/ADHDWomen, a thread began: "Taking on accents is an ADHD thing?" The OP shares, "My whole life, I've picked up accents. I, myself, never noticed, but everyone around me would be like, 'Why are you talking like that??' It could be after I watched a show or movie with an accent or after I've traveled somewhere with a different accent than my 'normal.'
They continue, "Apparently, I pick it up fast, but it fades out slowly. Today... I'm scrolling Instagram, I watch a reel from a comedian couple (Darcy and Jeremy. IYKYK) about how Darcy (ADHD) picks up accents everywhere they go. It's called ADHD Mirroring??? And it's another way of masking."
(The OP is referring to Darcy Michaels and his husband Jeremy Baer, who are both touring comedians based in Canada.)
Hundreds of people on the Reddit thread alone seem to relate. One comments, "Omfg I've done this my whole life; I'll even pick up on the pauses/spaces when I'm talking to someone who is ESL—but English is my first language lol."
Sometimes, it can be a real issue for those around the chameleon. "I accidentally mimicked a waitress's weird laugh one time. As soon as she was out of earshot, my family started to reprimand me, but I was already like 'oh my god I don’t know why I did that, I feel so bad.'"
Many commenters on TikTok were shocked to find out this can be a sign of ADHD. One jokes, "Omg, yes, at a store the cashier was talking to me and she was French. She's like 'Oh are you French too? No, I'm not lol. I'm very east coast Canada."
And some people just embrace it and make it work for them. "I mirror their words or phrase! I’m 30. I realized I start calling everyone sweetie cause my manager does & I work at coffee shop."