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Joy

Here are 19 'unconventionally attractive' types people love, proving everyone is beautiful

“What a wonderful, body-positive thread.”

attractive features, types, beauty standards

via Stronganova/PixaBay

A couple hiding a kiss

As a culture, we are always talking about the fact that the “ideal” man or woman we see represented in advertising is so unattainable that it damages people’s mental health. But the reality is that when it comes to dating, 99% of us aren’t out there looking for someone the media thinks is ideal. We’re much more likely to search for the “type” we like best. And what's cool is that just about everyone is somebody’s type, whether they know it or not.

The funny thing is that some people have a very specific type, while others cast a much wider net.

A Redditor by the name of MyPasswordIsABC999 asked people on the forum to share a “type” they’re attracted to but “too embarrassed” to tell anyone. The question was a big hit, receiving over 17,000 responses, and most were proud of their type. In fact, the most popular comment on the thread was, “So many of these aren’t embarrassing."

People shared all the different types they’re into, whether it’s those who are larger, thinner, have big or small features, and are tall, short or medium height. They also shared their favorite personality types, whether geeky, assertive, nice or mean.

"You know what I just love about this whole entire thread? Basically, every person in the world is attractive to someone else…that’s just so damn wholesome," Runningprofmama wrote.

Another commenter was pleased by the refreshing tone of the thread. "What a wonderful body-positive thread. This is rare," WhaleSexOdyssey wrote.

The thread might have been responsible for some love connections, too, as some people pointed out they were the type the commenters appreciate.

Here are 19 of the best responses to the question: “What’s a ‘type’ you’re attracted to but too embarrassed to tell anyone?”

1. Mad scientists

"What about a German scientist that is a high achiever with publications, patents, 80% of a PhD, and their own lab? Oddly specific, I know." — DAngerscientist

2. Mean-looking women

"I like women that are kind of mean or at least look mean and stern." — Juicecalculator.

3. Stabby-adjacent

"Crazy enough that I think I might actually get stabbed, but not crazy enough to actually do it." — CryaxisOG

4. Girls with big noses

"Girls with big noses. I’m not quite sure why. Something about a prominent nose just adds a unique sexiness to a woman’s face." — Wokeupstilltiredwrote.

6. Any type

"I literally have no type and no girl ever believes me. Scrolling through this post proves it. I'm just like yep strong girls love 'em, thick girls love 'em, goth girls love 'em, tomboy girls love 'em, tall girls love 'em, short girls love 'em." — Hydroxs

7. Gray-haired men

"I’m 38, and I’m starting to be attracted to men with gray hair, or at least salt and pepper hair, which is completely age-appropriate, but it feels really weird." — Meansecurity

8. Larger girls

"I’ve always been attracted to larger girls. I was embarrassed about this when I was younger, but fortunately got over it." — shoesofwandering

9. Strong woman

"Assertive, not in a bossing around kind of way, more a she gets what she wants kind of way while still being a kind person." — HelferleinLarger girls

10. Shy girls

"Super shy girls. Dating one currently and I love her so much. I feel like people assume if you like shy quiet women that you just want someone subservient. But the truth is I just like taking care of her and I love the way she looks at me when I predict what she wants and is so happy because I pay attention to her so I know how to love her and serve her." — AbyssWankerArtorias

11. Larger men

"I only discovered this about myself with the guy I’m dating now. Was always into really skinny dudes and only dated skinny dudes and then I saw my guy one day, thought he was really cute, immediate crush.

He was wearing a mask for the first few months of knowing him (only knew him as a coworker), and then one day I see him walking around without his mask and oh my god he is gorgeous. I had to physically avert my eyes because I couldn’t stop looking at him. I’m pretty shy and unapproachable to people I don’t really know, so he stopped talking to me but I couldn’t stand it, overcame my shyness and went and confronted him about it one day (playfully), took his phone and put my details in it, and told him to talk to me. A month later we were dating. Anyway. I like thinking about it.

He’s soft and comfy and so strong so I feel really safe with him. I call him my pillow bf I’m seeing him later and I can’t wait." — PsychicNinja_

12. Geeky guys

"The awkward geeky guys with glasses, the ones who are confident in the things they love but just a bit awkward.
There's just something I love about winding them up, because sometimes they'll try and give as good as they can get. But once they don't know what to do they're usually smiling and having fun but have no idea what to say. That's the bit I like.
The minute I see I can get that reaction out of someone I'm hooked.

But it's also an issue, because usually they have low self-esteem so at some point it turns into a why are you dating someone like me." — AddictiveMischief

13. Big beefy men who are nerds

"Big boys. Human equivalents of bears. Tall and broad with thick arms and soft bellies, that could just pick me and throw me around. There is no too big. I loved climbing trees as a kid and now I'm rediscovering that hobby.

Men who watch anime and play video games and have any other nerdy hobby. I'm not joking. I was a weird anime kid growing up, it contributed to my bullying, I refused to give up on my interests." — ghostyface6

14. Girls with crooked teeth

"Absolutely. I never knew I liked this so much until I realized some other folks are into it, too. I find it very humanizing and interesting. Add in some sorta sleepy eyes (just a little bags under the eye) and I'm SOLD." — PolkaWillNeverDie00

15. Tall and slim guys

"I really like looking at this type aesthetically. They just make visually pleasing lines, especially if they're leaning against a wall with their hands in their pockets or sitting in a rocking chair." — CCVeediVee

16. Buff women and twinks

"I like women that are manly and men that girly. Call that the bisexual agenda." — heyhihaiheyahehe

17. Whatever Jack Black is

"Whatever the f*** Jack Black is, but I’m NOT embarrassed. He’s f***ing hot to me. Fat, bearded, talented, and passionate. My kind of man. WOOF!" — Lostswansong

18. Red-haired men

"Men with red hair! Although I’m not embarrassed! Although a bit embarrassed to have a 'type.' It seems kind of shallow. It just seems to be unusual to love a specific hair color!" — Hagrid'sSexyNipples

19. Ice queens

"Every woman I've ever been with is cold, detached and acts like an aloof cat." — Dammulf

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Our favorite giveaway is back. Enter to win a free, fun date! 🌊 💗

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Here are the incredible dates:

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Grab your favorite person and get some much-needed ocean time. Did you know research on “blue spaces” suggests that being near water is linked with better mental health and well-being, including feeling calmer and less stressed? We’ll treat you to a beach adventure like a surfing or sailing class, plus ocean-friendly bags from GOT Bag and blankets from Sand Cloud so your day by the water feels good for you and a little gentler on the ocean too.

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Love nights in as much as you love a date night out? We’ve got you. Have friends over for a movie night or make it a cozy night in with your favorite person. You’ll get a Disney+ and Hulu subscription so you can watch Nat Geo ocean content, plus a curated list of ocean-friendly documentaries and a movie-night basket of snacks. Easy, comfy, and you’ll probably come out of it loving the ocean even more.

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Date includes two (2) three-day GA tickets. Does not include accommodation, travel, or flights.

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Mental Health

Happiness researcher explains how making a 'reverse bucket list' can change your life

Counterintuitive in our culture, but effective.

arthur c. brooks, harvard, psychology, happiness research, bucket list

Gage Skidmore/Wikimedia Commons

Harvard researcher Arthur C. Brooks studies what leads to human happiness.

We live in a society that prizes ambition, celebrating goal-setting, and hustle culture as praiseworthy vehicles on the road to success. We also live in a society that associates successfully getting whatever our hearts desire with happiness. The formula we internalize from an early age is that desire + ambition + goal-setting + doing what it takes = a successful, happy life.

But as Harvard University happiness researcher Arthur C. Brooks has found, in his studies as well as his own experience, that happiness doesn't follow that formula. "It took me too long to figure this one out," Brooks told podcast host Tim Ferris, explaining why he uses a "reverse bucket list" to live a happier life.

bucket list, wants, desires, goals, detachment Many people make bucket lists of things they want in life. Giphy

Brooks shared that on his birthday, he would always make a list of his desires, ambitions, and things he wanted to accomplish—a bucket list. But when he was 50, he found his bucket list from when he was 40 and had an epiphany: "I looked at that list from when I was 40, and I'd checked everything off that list. And I was less happy at 50 than I was at 40."

As a social scientist, he recognized that he was doing something wrong and analyzed it.

"This is a neurophysiological problem and a psychological problem all rolled into one handy package," he said. "I was making the mistake of thinking that my satisfaction would come from having more. And the truth of the matter is that lasting and stable satisfaction, which doesn't wear off in a minute, comes when you understand that your satisfaction is your haves divided by your wants…You can increase your satisfaction temporarily and inefficiently by having more, or permanently and securely by wanting less."

Brooks concluded that he needed a "reverse bucket list" that would help him "consciously detach" from his worldly wants and desires by simply writing them down and crossing them off.

"I know that these things are going to occur to me as natural goals," Brooks said, citing human evolutionary psychology. "But I do not want to be owned by them. I want to manage them." He discussed moving those desires from the instinctual limbic system to the conscious pre-frontal cortex by examining each one and saying, "Maybe I get it, maybe I don't," but crossing them off as attachments. "And I'm free…it works," he said.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

"When I write them down, I acknowledge that I have the desire," he explained on X. "When I cross them out, I acknowledge that I will not be attached to this goal."

The idea that attachment itself causes unhappiness is a concept found in many spiritual traditions, but it is most closely associated with Buddhism. Mike Brooks, PhD, explains that humans need healthy attachments, such as an attachment to staying alive and attachments to loved ones, to avoid suffering. But many things to which we are attached are not necessarily healthy, either by degree (over-attachment) or by nature (being attached to things that are impermanent).

"We should strive for flexibility in our attachments because the objects of our attachment are inherently in flux," Brooks writes in Psychology Today. "In this way, we suffer unnecessarily when we don't accept their impermanent nature."

What Arthur C. Brooks suggests that we strive to detach ourselves from our wants and desires because the simplest way to solve the 'haves/wants = happiness' formula is to reduce the denominator. The reverse bucket list, in which you cross off desires before you fulfill them, can help free you from attachment and lead to a happier overall existence.

This article originally appeared last year.

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History (Education)

40 years after the Challenger exploded, one teacher shares how the ride was almost her fate

"I had no idea that anything like this could ever be part of my life."

NASA; Challenger explosion; Challenger crew; teacher in space; Challenger 40th anniversary

NASA/Wikimedia Commons

The Challenger crew.

In January 1986, the space shuttle Challenger took off with seven crew members on board, ready to make history. It was a big deal because this space mission wasn't just full of astronauts. Christa McAuliffe, a high school history teacher, was on board the spacecraft after winning a contest for the Teacher in Space Project. This would've made her the first teacher in space, so schools across the country wheeled televisions into their classrooms to allow students to watch history.

Instead, tragedy struck. The shuttle exploded just 73 seconds after takeoff due to "the destruction of the seals that are intended to prevent hot gases from leaking through the joint during the propellant burn of the rocket motor," according to NASA. All seven passengers on the Challenger perished in the explosion, leaving the country in shock.

NASA; Challenger explosion; Challenger crew; teacher in space; Challenger 40th anniversary The Challenger on crawler transportNASA/Wikimedia Commons

January 2026 was the 40th anniversary of the accident, and NewsChannel 5 caught up with one of the teachers who was competing for the seat McAuliffe occupied. Carolyn Dobbins taught at McMurray Middle in Tennessee in 1984 when NASA announced the Teacher in Space Project. Having always wanted to go to space, Dobbins applied for a seat on the shuttle. Over 11,000 teachers applied to be the one who would make history, and to Dobbins' surprise, she was chosen as a semifinalist. "I had no idea that anything like this could ever be part of my life," she said.

The retired teacher explains to the news station that she spent days on her application for space, saying, "An amazing thing happened." She shares about the series of snow days in 1985. "Snow day. Then we had another snow day and another snow day. Those snow days were what I needed! It was basically a mini-book about your beliefs, your desire to go into space, getting to the soul of the person."

NASA; Challenger explosion; Challenger crew; teacher in space; Challenger 40th anniversary The Challenger explosion. Kennedy Space Center/Wikimedia Commons

She admits that some of her students were worried about her going into space if she were to be chosen, but she brushed off their concerns, saying, "'Oh, I'll be back.'" Dobbins was completely confident in the success of the mission and excited to be able to do something she once thought was impossible. After being interviewed by a panel in Washington, D.C., she was sure she would be chosen for the mission. All of the teachers invited to be interviewed were also confident they'd be chosen, according to Dobbins. But only one could go, and the person chosen was 37-year-old mom of two, Christa McAuliffe, a teacher at Concord High School in Concord, New Hampshire.

Dobbins stood in front of her television watching the shuttle take off instead of experiencing it herself. Once the announcer said the magic words, "We have liftoff," the almost astronaut shares that she let out a sigh of relief before saying, "Way to go, Christa." She then turned off the television.

"Within seconds, the phone rang," Dobbins tells NewsChannel 5. "It was a friend. I said, 'Isn't it great? The shuttle has gone!' She said, 'Carolyn, you don't know.' It was the tone. You don't know. I just put the phone down, flipped on the TV. There it was. Already the footage was going of the explosion. That is still such an emotional moment."

NASA; Challenger explosion; Challenger crew; teacher in space; Challenger 40th anniversary Jay Greene in the control room after the Challenger explodesNASA/Wikimedia Commons

Dobbins taught for 53 years before retiring, and while she would've been willing to go on another mission that aimed to put a teacher in space, she's thankful for the life she has been able to live.

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Pets

Vet demonstrates 'squish the cat' method of safe cat handling in delightfully helpful video

There's a reason Dr. Burstyn's "How to pick up a cat" video has been viewed 23 million times.

cats, pets, cat handling, veterinarian, feline behavior

Helpful Vancouver Vet/YouTube

Handling a cat may seem like a delicate matter, but being delicate isn't actually the way to go.

If you've ever tried to make a cat do something it doesn't want to do, you've likely experienced the terror that a cat's wrath can invoke. Our cute, cuddly feline friends may be small, but the razor blades on their feet are no joke when they decide to utilize them. Even cats who love us can get spicy if we try to manhandle them, so we can imagine how things will go with cats who don't know us well. But sometimes it's necessary to handle a cat even if it's resistant to the idea.

This is where Vancouver veterinarian Dr. Uri Burst yn comes in. His "How to pick up a cat like a pro" video, in which he demonstrates a few ways of picking up and handling a cat, has been viewed over 23 million times since he shared it in 2019. Unlike many viral videos, it's not humorous and nothing outrageous happens, but the combo of Burstyn's calm demeanor and his repeated instructions to "squish that cat" has endeared him to the masses.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

The video truly is helpful; he shows the ways to pick up a cat that make them feel the most secure using his cats, one-year-old Claudia and 14-year-old Mr. Pirate. He explains that cats spook very easily and it's best to introduce yourself to them gently. Let them sniff your fingers, keeping your fingers curled in, and once they've sniffed you, you can often give them a light rub on the cheek or under the chin.

Picking them up is a different story. The reason many cats will claw or scratch you when you try to pick them up is because they feel unsupported or unsafe, so they'll scramble around trying to get some footing. Burstyn shows how he picks up Claudia with one hand under the chest and one hand under her abdomen. If he needs to carry her around, he squishes her into his body so she feels "nice and supported." He may even put a hand under her front paws.

cats, pets, cat handling, veterinarian, feline behavior Cats can be finicky about how they're held. Photo credit: Canva

Then came the best part of the video: "Squish That Cat"

"Now if we do have a cat who's trying to get away from us?" Burstyn said. "We always squish that cat. If you're trying to hold the cat down, whether it's to trim their nails or to give them a pill, or whether you just want to have a cat not run off for a moment, squish that cat. All you need to know about cat restraint is to squish that cat."

Burstyn explains that cats generally feel very secure being squished, even if they're really scared.

"Sometimes cats come to me in the clinic, and they're quite afraid," he said. "And you just gently squish them, and they'll sit there and kind of not hurt themselves, not hurt us. Just hang out and let us do our thing."

He demonstrated putting a towel over the cat, explaining, "If you have a towel handy, this is one of the best cat restraint tools around. You can just throw a towel on the catty and squish her with the towel, that way they won't get a claw into you if they are scrambling about a bit. Very safe and gentle, and generally cats are very, very happy to be squished like that."

cats, pets, cat handling, veterinarian, feline behavior Squish that cat. Photo credit: Canva

Dr. Burstyn also showed how to do a "football hold," tucking the cat under your arm with them facing backwards. "So this is kind of an emergency way if you really need to carry a cat somewhere in a hurry," he said. Scooping up Claudia, he explained, "Little head's under your arm, butt in your hand, and you squish her tight to your body. And with that little football carry, you can basically hold a cat very securely and very safely, because it's really hard for them to rake you with their hind legs."

If you're worried about over-squishing your cat, Dr. Burnstyn says don't. "You don't have to worry about hurting a cat," he said. "They're very, very tough little beasts. You know, just squishing them against your body's never going to do them any harm. In fact, they tend to feel more safe and secure when they're being held tightly."

Dr. Burnstyn also demonstrated how to pick up and set down a "shoulder cat" who insists on climbing onto people's shoulders and hanging out there, as Mr. Pirate does. It's highly entertaining, as Mr. Pirate is a big ol' chonky kitty.

@yozron
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People in the comments loved Dr. Burnstyn's demonstration, with several dubbing him the Bob Ross of veterinary medicine. Even people who don't have cats said they watched the whole video, and many loved Claudia and Mr. Pirate as well.

"This is just proof that cats are liquid."

"12/10 cat. Excellent squishability."

"So essentially, cats love hugs? That's the most wonderful thing i've heard all day."

"This cat is so well mannered and looks educated."

"Mr Pirate is an absolute unit."

"S q u i s h . T h a t . C a t ."

"I need 'Squish that cat' shirt.

"Dang, that actually helped with my female cat. She has been through at least two owners before me and had some bad expriences which obviously resulted in trust issues. She has now been with me for two years and it had gotten loads better, but she still did not want me to hold her. Normally I simply would have let her be, but for vet visits and such it was not an ideal situation. But then I saw this video and tried to squish the cat. And she loves it! She is turning into quite the snuggly bug. Thank you!"

So there you go. When all else fails, squish that cat and see what happens.

You can follow Dr. Burstyn on YouTube at Helpful Vancouver Vet.

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Education

How to keep your mouth shut in conversations when you know you should really stay quiet

Most people never regret just staying silent.

quiet, finger over lips, don't talk, keep it to yourself, silence

via Canva/Photos

A woman with her finger over her mouth.

It can be hard to stay quiet when you feel like you just have to speak your mind. But sometimes it's not a great idea to share your opinions on current events with your dad or tell your boss where they're wrong in a meeting. And having a bit of self-control during a fight with your spouse is a good way to avoid apologizing the next morning.

Further, when we fight the urge to talk when it's not necessary, we become better listeners and give others a moment in the spotlight to share their views. Building that small mental muscle to respond to events rather than react can make all the difference in social situations.

argument, coworkers, angry coworkers, hostile work enviornment, disagreement A woman is getting angry at her coworker.via Canva/Photos

What is the WAIT method?

One way people have honed the skill of holding back when they feel the burning urge to speak up is the WAIT method, an acronym for the question you should ask yourself in that moment: "Why Am I Talking?" Pausing to consider the question before you open your mouth can shift your focus from "being heard" to "adding value" to any conversation.

The Center for The Empowerment Dynamic has some questions we should consider after taking a WAIT moment:

What is my intention behind what I am about to say?
What question can I ask to better understand what the other person is saying?
Is my need to talk an attempt to divert the attention to me?
How might I become comfortable with silence rather than succumb to my urge to talk?

tape over muth, sielnce, be quiet, mouth shut, saying nothing A man with tape over his mouth.via Canva/Photos

The WAIT method is a good way to avoid talking too much. In work meetings, people who overtalk risk losing everyone's attention and diluting their point to the extent that others aren't quite sure what they were trying to say. Even worse, they can come across as attention hogs or know-it-alls. Often, the people who get to the heart of the matter succinctly are the ones who are noticed and respected.

Just because you're commanding the attention of the room doesn't mean you're doing yourself any favors or helping other people in the conversation.

The WAIT method is also a great way to give yourself a breather and let things sit for a moment during a heated, emotional discussion. It gives you a chance to cool down and rethink your goals for the conversation. It can also help you avoid saying something you regret.

fight, spuse disagreement, communications skills, upset husband, argument A husband is angry with his wife. via Canva/Photos

How much should I talk in a meeting?

So if it's a work situation, like a team meeting, you don't want to be completely silent. How often should you speak up?

Cary Pfeffer, a speaking coach and media trainer, shared an example of the appropriate amount of time to talk in a meeting with six people:

"I would suggest a good measure would be three contributions over an hour-long meeting from each non-leader participant. If anyone is talking five/six/seven times you are over-participating! Allow someone else to weigh in, even if that means an occasional awkward silence. Anything less seems like your voice is just not being represented, and anything over three contributions is too much."

Ultimately, the WAIT method is about taking a second to make sure you're not just talking to hear yourself speak. It helps ensure that you have a clear goal for participating in the conversation and that you're adding value for others. Knowing when and why to say something is the best way to make a positive contribution and avoid shooting yourself in the foot.

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Learning

Video games used to build the cognitive skills Gen Alpha is missing out on. It's an easy fix.

"Children in the '90s played games that forced the brain to fail and try again."

video games; cognitive decline; cognitive skills; Gen Alpha; Millennials; Gen Z; old school gaming

Photo credit: Canva

Kids playing video games.

There was nothing more frustrating as a kid in the '90s than almost completing a level in a game only to hear that dreaded sound. It was your last life blinking before your eyes. Your only choice was to start over or turn off the video game and try again tomorrow. There was no getting around the fact that you were going to have to do it all over again, but next time you'd be faster, smarter, and better prepared than the last.

This is a skill that was built through repetition for Millennials and Gen X. That small annoyance in older video games exercised a muscle that would be helpful throughout life—one that increased the cognitive skills of these two older generations. And while older Gen Zers experienced this important brain development tool built into older video games, younger Gen Zers and Gen Alpha are critically missing out.

video games; cognitive decline; cognitive skills; Gen Alpha; Millennials; Gen Z; old school gaming Two kids enjoying a video game together on the couch. 🎮✨Photo credit: Canva

The brain development skills consistently present in video games from the late '70s through the '90s were frustration tolerance, critical thinking skills, delayed gratification, and pattern recognition. Licensed mental health counselor and former teacher, Veronica Lichtenstein, discussed '90s video games with Newsweek, saying, "You fought through levels, memorized patterns and finally saw the ending. It felt like you accomplished something. Your brain gave you this solid, lasting dose of satisfaction, like finishing a tough project.”

In a video by The Pizza Breakroom on Instagram, two men discuss an article allegedly written by a psychologist exploring this very phenomenon. "He said children in the '90s played games that forced the brain to fail and try again," one man reads. "Mario, Sonic, Prince of Persia, you had three lives, no saves, no hints. When you lost you learned patience, planning, and frustration tolerance. Today, many games guide kids step-by-step. Autosave every ten seconds and removes real challenge."

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Games like Roblox and Minecraft, which a lot of kids enjoy playing, are never-ending. The game seems to be designed to encourage the player to spend money to keep up with trends, such as offering new "skins." This isn't game money; it's actual money that requires an adult's debit or credit card. There are no significant rewards offered through the satisfaction of beating a level or the game in its entirety. If a child is struggling in the room they chose to play in, the game allows them to leave and enter a different room filled with different players.

“Nineties games are a challenge for building your skills. Today’s games are often a test for your psychological resistance. A great deal are built to track, exploit and addict,” Lichtenstein shares with Newsweek.

video games; cognitive decline; cognitive skills; Gen Alpha; Millennials; Gen Z; old school gaming Family gaming fun: everyone is focused and competitive!Photo credit: Canva

But all hope is not lost on building these important skills in the youngest generations. Nineties games are still around, along with their original, refurbished consoles. There are also all-in-one Nintendo and Sega consoles that have all the '90s games preloaded. Parents can encourage video game play on actual consoles, not tablets or computers. A big perk is also that parents can actually get to play with their child while jogging their own memory of cheat codes and game layout.

For some, it may be difficult to watch their child struggle to figure out how to move through the old school games, but the point is for them to learn frustration tolerance and other cognitive skills. These skills are essential to navigate the world as an adult, and introducing kids to the games their parents played at their age is a fun way to do it.

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