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12 non-threatening leadership strategies for women

We mustn't hurt a man's feelings.

women at work, comedy, leadership
With permission from Sarah Cooper.

Men and the feels.


Note: This an excerpt is from Sarah Cooper's book, How to Be Successful Without Hurting Men's Feelings.

In this fast-paced business world, female leaders need to make sure they're not perceived as pushy, aggressive, or competent.

One way to do that is to alter your leadership style to account for the fragile male ego.

Should men accept powerful women and not feel threatened by them? Yes. Is that asking too much?

IS IT?

Sorry, I didn't mean to get aggressive there. Anyhoo, here are twelve non-threatening leadership strategies for women.

women\u2019s communication, women in business, men

Encourage.

With permission from Sarah Cooper.

When setting a deadline, ask your coworker what he thinks of doing something, instead of just asking him to get it done. This makes him feel less like you're telling him what to do and more like you care about his opinions.

Sarah Cooper comedy, women, success

Sharing ideas.

With permission from Sarah Cooper.

When sharing your ideas, overconfidence is a killer. You don't want your male coworkers to think you're getting all uppity. Instead, downplay your ideas as just "thinking out loud," "throwing something out there," or sharing something "dumb," "random," or "crazy."

emails, comedy, gen

Email requests.

With permission from Sarah Cooper.

Pepper your emails with exclamation marks and emojis so you don't come across as too clear or direct. Your lack of efficient communication will make you seem more approachable.

office politics, men, relationships

Idea sharing.

With permission from Sarah Cooper.

If a male coworker steals your idea in a meeting, thank him for it. Give him kudos for how he explained your idea so clearly. And let's face it, no one might've ever heard it if he hadn't repeated it.

sexism, sexist comments, sexual harassment

Sexism.

With permission from Sarah Cooper.

When you hear a sexist comment, the awkward laugh is key. Practice your awkward laugh at home, with your friends and family, and in the mirror. Make sure you sound truly delighted even as your soul is dying inside.

threats, non-threatening, mansplain

Mansplain.

With permission from Sarah Cooper.

Men love explaining things. But when he's explaining something and you already know that, it might be tempting to say, "I already know that." Instead, have him explain it to you over and over again. It will make him feel useful and will give you some time to think about how to avoid him in the future.

leadership, work mistakes, hurt feelings

Mistakes.

With permission from Sarah Cooper.

Pointing out a mistake is always risky so it's important to always apologize for noticing the mistake and then make sure that no one thinks you're too sure about it. People will appreciate your "hey what do I know?!" sensibilities.

promotions, management, coworkers

Promotions.

With permission from Sarah Cooper.

Asking your manager for a promotion could make you seem power- hungry, opportunistic, and transparent. Instead, ask a male coworker to vouch for you. Have your coworker tell your manager you'd be great for the role even though you don't really want it. This will make you more likely to actually get that promotion.

rude behavior, ignored, self esteem

Rude.

With permission from Sarah Cooper.

Sometimes not everyone is properly introduced at the start of a meeting. Don't take it personally even if it happens to you all the time, and certainly don't stop the meeting from moving forward to introduce yourself. Sending a quick note afterward is the best way to introduce yourself without seeming too self-important.

interruptions, resilience,expression

Interruptions.

With permission from Sarah Cooper.

When you get interrupted, you might be tempted to just continue talking or even ask if you can finish what you were saying. This is treacherous territory. Instead, simply stop talking. The path of least resistance is silence.

typing, off-putting, work skills

Collaboration.

With permission from Sarah Cooper.

When collaborating with a man, type using only one finger. Skill and speed are very off-putting.

disagreements, solution, problem solving

Disagreements.

With permission from Sarah Cooper.

When all else fails, wear a mustache so everyone sees you as more man-like. This will cancel out any need to change your leadership style. In fact, you may even get a quick promotion!

strategies, power dynamics, team player

In conclusion...

With permission from Sarah Cooper.

Many women have discovered the secret power of non-threatening leadership. We call it a "secret power" because no one else actually knows about it. We keep our power hidden within ourselves so that it doesn't frighten and intimidate others. That's what makes us the true unsung heroes of the corporate world.

About the Author: Sarah Cooper
Sarah Cooper is a writer, comedian, and author of 100 Tricks to Appear Smart in Meetings. Her new book, How to Be Successful Without Hurting Men's Feelings, is out now.

humor, satire, executives

The comedic book cover.

With permission from Sarah Cooper.

A satirical take on what it's like to be a woman in the workplace, Cooper draws from her experience as a former executive in the world of tech (she's a former Googler and Yahooer). You can get the book here.


This article was originally published on 3.25.19

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5 ways people are going "All In" this week

From the silly to the sentimental, there are so many ways people like to go “all in” on something. Here are our five favorite examples this week.

5 ways people are going "All In" this week
5 ways people are going "All In" this week
5 ways people are going "All In" this week
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When you hear the words “all in,” what do you think? You might think of getting groovy at a nursing home, a french bulldog having a total breakdown in the drive-thru, or maybe even a snack bar company promoting self care. Whatever you picture, the idea is the same: Going “all in” means doing something with total commitment—literally giving it your “all” and going completely over the top. No second guessing, no holding back—just full-throttle enthusiasm with some creativity and flair thrown in. That’s how we get those viral internet moments we can’t stop watching.

This DWTS dance trend 

If you’ve been watching TV or on the internet this week, you might have seen the viral dance move Dylan Efron and Daniella Karagach performed while on Dancing With The Stars (DWTS) last week. The one particular move, where Dylan holds Daniella as she does a mid-air horizontal walk, is going viral with over 8k videos using the sound. Some of my personal favorites include a mom and her baby, two girls or a girl and her cat, proving this dance trend is truly for anyone to try.

All In on Fiber

Speaking of trends, there’s one that really is about going “all in”, it’s called #fibermaxxing. After years of protein being the biggest nutrition trend, it looks like fiber might be taking over. For good reason too, while protein can cause issues with digestion, fiber can lead to better digestion, blood sugar management, weight control and reduced disease risk. Our friends at All In made a video explaining the #fibermaxxing trend. Each All In bar has 6 to 7 grams of fiber , plus they are delicious. Don't take our word for it, though: Click here to try it yourself (for free).

This child's long hair

This creator went all in… on pranking the audience. I don’t want to give away the contents of this video, but let’s just say it’s creative- and it made me quite literally laugh out loud. There are a lot of "momfluencers" out there who make content that uses their children, and as relatable and heartfelt as it is, sometimes a little satire break is worth appreciating.

Two entrepreneurs getting down to business


Lots of people dabble in entrepreneurship. These two went "all in" on helping others learn it. After four years of interviews with CEOs , research, edits, and a Penguin Random House book deal (yes, seriously), their book, Down to Business, has made its way into classrooms and libraries around the world. Now they are teaching other kids that age is not a barrier to entry in entrepreneurship; the earlier you start, the further you can go—and an entrepreneurial mindset will serve you no matter what you do in life.

Bridesmaids who went all in

Last on our list; two bridesmaids who committed to the bit. These ladies went “all in” in their remake of the legendary scene from the movie “Bridesmaids”. If you haven’t seen the original movie, starring Kristen Wig and Maya Rudolph, this might be your sign.

In the viral TikTok this bride, Caroline, had no idea what was coming when she put on her favorite movie while getting ready for her big day. The fact that she wanted to watch her favorite show before her bridesmaids surprised her, makes this going “all in” surprise all the better.

Snag your free (!!) snack bar here while this deal lasts. Just pick up a bar at Sprouts and text a pic ofv your receipt to get it for free. Enoy!

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The Monkees' really were incredible singers, and this 1967 acapella Christmas song proves it

The Monkees have a complicated place in rock music history. But they were truly gifted musicians.

the monkees, monkees christmas show, riu chiu, 60s bands, music history ,rock n roll history, holiday songs, christmas songs
via The Monkees/YouTube

The Monkees singing "Riu Chiu."

The Monkees have a complicated place in the history of rock music. On the one hand, they scored some of the biggest hits of the ‘60s with “I’m a Believer,” “Last Train to Clarksville,” and “Daydream Believer.” On the other, they were a band manufactured in 1967 for a TV show that did little more than sing on their earlier records.

All that changed in 1967 when they wrestled control over their musical careers from the executives who kept them out of the studio and began recording their music with the “Headquarters” album. But even though they proved to be talented musicians, The Monkees were still branded as a prefabricated band whose success was owed more to session musicians and top-tier songwriters.

Anyone who doubts the talent of Mickey Dolenz, Michael Nesmith, Davy Jones and Peter Tork, look no further than a performance on The Monkees’ 1967 “Christmas Show” episode. Like every episode of The Monkees' TV show, this one featured a musical number. But this time, instead of a rock tune with a pre-MTV video of the band monkeying around, this featured the band singing an acapella version of “Riu Chiu,” a Spanish villancico that has attained some contemporary fame as a Christmas carol. The song is attributed to Mateo Flecha the Elder, who died in 1553.

The performance highlights the band’s unique vocal abilities that stem from different musical traditions. Before The Monkees, Dolenz was a rock singer, Nesmith was a country singer-songwriter from Texas, Tork was a folk musician and Jones was an English theatrical performer best known for his performance as the Artful Dodger in “Oliver!” But in this performance, their vocals blend perfectly.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

The “Christmas Show” episode was memorable for the band’s outstanding vocal performance but also stands as one of the more memorable Christmas specials in TV history. Coming on the heels of the “Summer of Love,” the story is about The Monkees babysitting Melvin Vandersnoot, the hard-hearted child of an affluent family. After numerous attempts to get him into the Christmas spirit, the Monkees warm up his icy heart after showing him love, something all the money in the world can’t buy.

Vandersnoot, was played with incredible maturity by Butch Patrick, best known as Eddie on “The Munsters.”

- YouTube www.youtube.com

The Monkees' television show would be canceled in 1968 and the band’s original run wouldn’t last much longer. But all four band members would remain in the music business. The Monkees would reunite in the late ‘80s after the show became popular in reruns and would continue to tour over the next four decades, although most of the time, it was without Nesmith. Nesmith would pursue a country career in the ‘70s, and even though his work received a lukewarm reception at the time, his innovative mixture of country music, humor and psychedelia has made him a pioneer in the alt-country genre. Nesmith died in 2021, shortly after touring with Dolenz.

Outside his work as the mainstay in Monkee reunions, Dolenz has starred in numerous theatrical productions and recently released an EP of R.E.M covers. He still tours as a solo act.

Davy Jones went on to perform in Monkee reunions and guest star on several TV shows, most notably on an episode of “The Brady Bunch,” where he was the target of Marcia Brady’s affection. He passed away in 2012.

Peter Tork was a mainstay of The Monkees’ live performances through numerous reunions and played in a band called Shoe Suede Blues. Tork died in 2019 after a long battle with cancer.

Today, The Monkees’ legacy is viewed far more generously than it once was. With documentaries, re-released albums, and streaming platforms making their full catalog accessible, a new generation has discovered both their irresistible hits and their deeper, more experimental work. What was once dismissed as a “manufactured” band is now understood as a groundbreaking pop-art project that evolved into a real group with real voices—literally and figuratively.

the monkees, monkees christmas show, riu chiu, 60s bands, music history ,rock n roll history, holiday songs, christmas songs Monkees members laughing and playing pretend finger instruments together. media4.giphy.com

And their performance of “Riu Chiu,” still shared widely online every holiday season, is a testament to something true fans always knew: The Monkees were the real deal.

This article originally appeared in August.

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Woman screams at a mom for bringing 2-year-old 'man' into the restroom. She had the best response.

Who is bothered by a two-year-old in the restroom?

bathroom, child in bathroom, angry woman, potty training, public restroom, women's room
via Canva/Photos

A young boy on a toilet in the women's restroom.

Parents already have to deal with a lot while traveling with their little kids. Being outdoors, exposed to danger and unknown conditions, they have endless worries. On top of that, parents do their best to ensure their child is not an inconvenience in public settings. Often, they end up reminding others of the importance of empathy and understanding.

A woman who goes by u/Public-Proposal7378 on Reddit shared how another lady gave her a trying time when she was shopping at a public restroom with her little son. The post was taken down later. The little boy accompanied his mother to the women’s bathroom, but a lady went off on her. However, she received an epic response from the mum.

bathroom, men's room, wome's room, bathroom sign, public restrooms. A bathroom sign.via Canva/Photos

A woman was confronted for bringing her young son into the women's restroom

The mom shared that she went to the washroom and took her son along with her. The woman got into one of the stalls. She mentioned that the bathroom was empty at the time, and the duo casually began talking. “I refer to him as a buddy, so clearly he's a boy,” she noted.

Soon, an older lady came into the bathroom and went into the next stall. Hearing the mom speaking to her boy, the lady freaked out and started screaming. She referred to the two-year-old as a "man" and began ranting. “She was telling me that this is the women's room and males should not be in here. She goes on and on about how this is inappropriate, she doesn't feel safe, and males need to be in the men's room or wait outside,” the mom recalled. The mom couldn’t help but burst out laughing at the woman's worry.


She decided to wait after she was done, so she could speak to the woman, but the lady refused to get out of the stall. “I can see her feet just standing in front of the stall door waiting for me to leave,” she remarked. The mom quickly left the washroom but waited outside. “She comes out about a minute or so later, and she comes face to face with the two-year-old that she was screaming about being in the women's room,” she wrote. The mom responded to her unruly comments with a single, bold question. “I asked her where exactly I should leave my two-year-old while I need to use the bathroom, while I am out with him alone, if he doesn't belong in the women's room,” she asked. The elderly lady had no response and immediately left.

The commenters supported the mom

restroom, athroom stall, public restroom, stalls, toilets, A public restroom.via Canva/Photos

“Why are people really that threatened by the idea that a literal baby is in a women's bathroom?” the mom asked. Several people commented, assuring the mom that she wasn’t in the wrong. Many related to her plight of being criticized while traveling alone with a child. u/oldtimehawkey wrote, “If there are stalls around the toilets, I don’t see what the problem is. As long as someone isn’t seeing me peeing, they can be in the bathroom.” u/betterthanbeer added, “Yeah, I got wrong-footed by my toddler daughter who had to pee ‘now’ and dashed into the ladies room faster than I could redirect her. Two ladies helped.” u/Calgary_Calico said, “What an absolute psycho. He's two, He doesn't even know what male and female are yet, lady.” u/jneinefr remarked, “This is wild to me. I'm sorry you had to deal with that, even without an incident.”

Although there is no exact age at which a mom should stop taking her male child into the women's room, it's common knowledge that it's okay to do so until the child reaches grade school. Then, they are probably old enough to wait outside for mom to finish or to use the men's room themselves. The mom in this story had the perfect response to the older woman's reaction to her child in the bathroom: Where should I leave him when I have to go to the bathroom? This forced the older woman to choose between her "safety" and that of a two-year-old. She wasn't going to win that battle.

This article originally appeared last month

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Beavers were brought to the desert to save a dying river. Six years later, here are the results.

Their engineering feats are pretty dam incredible.

beavers, beaver dam, animals, wildlife, ecosystem, nature, earth, sustainability, deserts, waterways, rivers, pollution, climate change
Canva Photos

Can outsider beavers save this dried up river?

It's not easy being a river in the desert under the best of circumstances. The ecosystem exists in a very delicate balance, allowing water sources to thrive in the harsh conditions. These water sources in otherwise extremely dry areas are vital to the survival of unique wildlife, agriculture, and even tourism as they provide fresh drinking water for the people who live nearby.

But man-made problems like climate change, over-farming, and pollution have made a tough job even tougher in some areas. Rivers in Utah and Colorado part of the Colorado River Basin have been barely surviving the extremely harsh drought season. When the riverbeds get too dry, fish and other aquatic creatures die off and the wildfire risk increases dramatically.

About six years ago, one team of researchers had a fascinating idea to restore the health of some of Utah's most vulnerable rivers: Bring in the beavers.

beavers, beaver dam, animals, wildlife, ecosystem, nature, earth, sustainability, deserts, waterways, rivers, pollution, climate change Beaver on riverbank. Canva Photos

In 2019, master's student Emma Doden and a team of researchers from Utah State University began a "translocation" project to bring displaced beavers to areas like Utah's Price River, in the hopes of bringing it back to life.

Why beavers? Well, it just makes dam sense! (Sorry.)

In all seriousness, beaver dams restrict the flow of water in some areas of a river, creating ponds and wetlands. In drought-stricken areas, fish and other wildlife can take refuge in the ponds while the rest of the river runs dry, thus riding out the danger until it rains again.

When beavers are present in a watershed, the benefits are unbelievable: Better water quality, healthier fish populations, better nutrient availability, and fewer or less severe wildfires.

It's why beavers have earned the title of "keystone species," or any animal that has a disproportionate impact on the ecosystem around them.

beaver, dam, dam building, nature, ecosystem Pbs Nature Swimming GIF by Nature on PBS Giphy

Doden and her team took beavers who were captured or removed from their original homes due to their being a "nuisance," interfering with infrastructure, or being endangered, and—after a short period of quarantine—were brought to the Price River.

Despite the research team's best efforts, not all the translocated beavers have survived or stayed put over the years. Some have trouble adapting to their new home and die off or are killed by predators, while others leave of their own accord.

But sine 2019, enough have stayed and built dams that the team is starting to see the results of the effort. In fact, beaver projects just like this one have been going on all over the state in recent years.

- YouTube youtu.be

The water levels in the river are now the healthiest they've been in years. The fish are thriving and Utah residents are overjoyed with the experiment's results.

According to an early 2025 column in The Salt Lake Tribune (i.e. six years after the beaver translocation began) the revitalization of the Price River has "helped save [our] Utah town."

"A tributary of the Colorado River, the Price River runs through downtown Helper," wrote column authors Lenise Peterman and Jordan Nielson. "On a warm day, you’re likely to find the river filled with tourists and locals kayaking, tubing and fishing along its shore. A decade ago, it was hard to imagine this scene—and the thriving recreation economy that comes with it—was possible."

Of course, it wasn't JUST the beavers. Other federal water cleanup investments helped remove debris, break down old and malfunctioning dams, and place tighter regulations on agriculture grazing in the area that depleted vital plant life.

But the experts know that the beavers, and their incredible engineering work, are the real MVPs.

beavers, beaver dam, animals, wildlife, ecosystem, nature, earth, sustainability, deserts, waterways, rivers, pollution, climate change An actual beaver dam on the now-thriving Price River Public Domain

In other drying, struggling rivers in the area, researchers are bringing in beavers and even creating manmade beaver dams. They're hoping that the critters will take over the job as the rivers get healthier.

Utah's San Rafael River, which is in bleak condition, is a prime candidate. In one area of the river, a natural flood inspired a host of beavers to return to the area and "riparian habitat along that stretch had increased by 230%, and it had the most diverse flow patterns of anywhere on the river," according to KUER.

It's hard to believe that beavers nearly went extinct during the heyday of the fur trapping industry, and continued to struggle as they were considered nuisances and pests. Now, they're getting the respect they deserve as engineer marvels, and their populations have rebounded due to better PR and conservation programs.

It's about dam time!

This article originally appeared in June.

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10-year-old girl walks into police station and brings officers to tears with 2 simple words

She's been handing out handwritten cards to officers all over the country ever since.

police, cops, police officers, law enforcement, heroes, 10-year-old, thank you letters, kindness
Photo credit: Canva

A 10-year-old has been handing out Thank You cards to police officers across the country for years.

10-year-old Savannah Solis knew she had to do something. Per KHOUN, the girl from Tyler, Texas had heard the tragic news that two local police officers in New York had been murdered. The news, all the way back in 2015, brought her to tears.

Solis knew that, as a kid, there wasn't much she could do, to stop the bad guys, to make the world safer. But she dreamed of one day being a police officer herself and being able to help. As a 5-year-old, Solis says her mother had a heart attack and the first person to arrive and offer help was a police officer. She never forgot that officer's kindness and bravery.

Savannah’s mom, Debbie, recalled the immense love and support the girl had for police officers all over the world. Inspired and mesmerized by their line of duty, she hoped and wished only the best for each of them. “We would drive by and see them stopping somebody and in the backseat she would pray, asking God to take care of them,” the mom recounted.

In the meantime, she wanted the heroes in her own community to know that she cared. So she decided to write personal letters. Hundreds of them.

police, cops, police officers, law enforcement, heroes, 10-year-old, thank you letters, kindness a piece of paper with a heart drawn on it Photo by Immo Wegmann on Unsplash

Her letters had two words recurring each time, “Thank you.”

Furthermore, the girl explained as best as she could what their service meant to her and how grateful she was to them for saving lives.

During her Christmas break, the girl went all out making these letters and posting them—she even delivered a few personally to police departments all over Texas.

“You are my heroes. I want to say don’t stop, please don’t give up. Many do not care or appreciate the sacrifices you make every day. But I do,” the girl remarked. Savannah added a note of inspiration which read, “Many are standing with me today to let you know that you matter. Officers across Texas, you matter to me. Officers in New York City, you matter to me. Officers all across America, you matter to me. Please keep taking care of us.”

One of Solis' deliveries was caught on video, per KXAN, where officers were moved to tears by her gesture.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

She went about taking autographs of as many officers as she could. Debbie noted that her daughter didn’t want celebrity or artist autographs but those of the cops. All the officers are seen shaking hands and getting teary-eyed as they read the cards colored and highlighted with the title, “My hero.”

Austin Police Department Assistant Chief Jessica Robledo felt proud of the girl’s gesture and of the fact that their role was so valued in someone’s eyes.

“The words she spoke from her heart touched every single officer. I noticed everyone was trying to blink back tears. That’s what it’s all about. She is an old soul. She knows the right thing to say and I don’t think she even realizes the impact of her words on these officers and this department,” she remarked.

That was 10 years ago. As Solis grew up, she continued her personal outreach to police officers all over the country, letting them know that their bravery was appreciated.

She visited a precinct in Manchester, New Hampshire as recently in 2021 where she brought cards to the officers, met the K9 dogs, and was introduced to the police horses as well. Commenters were blown away that Solis was continuing the gesture after so many years.

"Savanna. Officers need that inspiration with everything going on today. You're remarkable for doing this."

"Amazing young lady right, thank you Savannah I appreciate all your efforts to show your appreciation for our men, woman, dogs and horses in blue"

"What an amazing young woman thank you for sharing this post and thank you for your service to our city. And all the law enforcement officers all over the Country."

Bravo, Savannah!

This article originally appeared in July. It has been updated.

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Dad asks to pick up teen son for the last time. Neither expected such wholesome tears.

"We're gonna do one last uppy."

fatherhood, parenting, hugging, sons, children, love
Photo Credit: Eric Justice Guzman, Used with permission, Canva

A father asks his teen son if he can pick him up one last time.

It sort of started out as a joke. Eric Justice Guzman was feeling all kinds of conflicted on the eve of his son Colby's 15th birthday. On one hand, he was so proud of his only son, filling with joy as he watched his official journey into the center of his teen years. On the other hand, as time goes by so quickly, he realized there was an expiration date for being able to open his arms and lift him up, with the heft only a parent has in happily picking up their child—just as he had done with Colby when he was a baby, a toddler, and a young child.

In a now-viral video, we see Eric instruct Colby to say "uppy" and "put your arms up." He then warns him, "And I'm gonna pick you up and hold you for the last time." His other child watches and adorably says, "I want an uppy!" Colby looks at his dad for a moment, a bit trepidatious, and then goes for it with his full chest. Up his arms go as he exclaims, "Uppy," and Eric lifts him up. Colby wraps his legs around him, almost as if directed by his inner three-year-old, and their hug is magnificent. More than that, they both seem to realize the profoundness of this moment at the exact same time.

Their tears turn into laughs and inside jokes, and it's truly an important few seconds in their father-son timeline.

Eric writes on Instagram, "This turned out to be way more emotional than I thought it was going to be. Last night, in Colby’s last few hours as a 14-year-old, I picked him up and held him for the last time.

I was thinking about the last moments we have in life but we don’t realize it. The last time my friend group hung out together, but didn’t know it was the last. The last time I talked to my dad before he unexpectedly passed. And like here, the last time I held my son in my arms before he was just too big.

I knew I had the strength for one last time. One last time for my kid to say 'Uppy' and I can lift him up and hold him. One last time to carry his weight as I have so many times before, but I knew this is probably the last time.

We celebrated 15 years old today. He’s now a young man. I don’t know how we got here so fast. It seemed just yesterday he was following me around trying to do everything I did… now he fits my clothes."

There are over 200,000 likes and comments from parents, non-parents, and mental health professionals all supporting this wonderful moment. Many viewers were in tears: "Need a warning label on this video. I'm weeping at the gym."

One writes, "As a mental health professional who specializes in adolescent development… THIS IS LOVE IN MOTION. This is the result of years of building trust and intimacy. Dad, THANK YOU for being a safe space for your children."

And this person simply shares, "Men need to be hugged more."

Child experts reveal that it's not just men and boys who benefit from long hugs from their parents.

Anne Marie Kirsten writes in her article, "Why Your Family Needs 20-Second Hugs," that research shows hugs boost one's well-being. "The 20-second hug is exactly as explained on the proverbial tin," Kirsten writes. "It’s not just a light pat or a quick squeeze. It’s wrapping your arms around someone and hugging for about 20 seconds or more. Research shows that long hugs help your body release feel-good hormones and can reduce blood pressure."

Kirsten cites Dr. Kory Floyd, a professor of communication and psychology at the University of Arizona, whose research focuses on how touch affects the mind and body. “Increases in oxytocin show benefits for the body; it makes us feel calmer and alleviates pain,” Floyd notes.

fatherhood, parenting, dads, children, hugging Father holding his sleeping son. Photo by Seljan Salimova on Unsplash

Upworthy had the pleasure of asking Eric, who lives in Idaho, a couple of questions about the lovely moment.

Upworthy: It was such a beautiful sentiment, the idea of picking up your son for a big hug just before he enters the crux of his teen years. What made you think of this?

Eric: "I have a three-year-old daughter and as Colby’s birthday was approaching I was looking at her thinking back to when he was that age. I just couldn’t believe how fast time has went. My firstborn baby is now a young man. I was then thinking I couldn’t remember the last time I held him, so I decided I will make when the last time is. We’re gonna do one last uppy."

Upworthy: I saw you both got very emotional. Did you talk about it after? Did you expect your son to have such strong feelings?

Eric: "We both had no idea it was going to get emotional. Initially I thought it would be funny. He’s almost as tall as me at 6’4”. I just thought it would be a fun memory but as I was describing it to him, it hit me hard. I started tearing up. Then holding him we both realized what was more sentimental than we realized. He’s my only boy, and we do everything together. When I put him down I saw his tears, and that was unexpected for sure. Then I looked at his stepmom and sister and they both had tears, which hit me even harder."

Eric Guzman, Colby, fatherhood, sons, family Eric Guzman poses with his son Colby.Photo Credit: Eric Justice Guzman

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