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A woman hit on a gay man in a parking lot and the misunderstanding is so heartwarming

The enouncter was special for both of them but for different reasons.

via WowRealNeat/TikTok and TifanieMayberry/TikTok

Tifanie Mayberry and David Frazier discuss their chance encounter.

Usually, when you read a story about people being confronted in a grocery store parking lot, it's bad news. But not this time. Back in November of 2023, Portland, Oregon-based photographer David Frazier had an uplifting experience in the parking lot of a New Seasons market after being approached by a female admirer.

He later told the story on TikTok in a video that received over 3.4 million views. While making a quick run to the store, Frazier parked next to a woman driving a Tesla. He noticed she was eating, hanging around and “vibing,” so he flashed her a smile and went into the store, where he picked up a bite to eat.

Upon returning to his car, the woman was still there. She rolled down her window and asked Frazier, “Hey, are you single?” Frazier was taken aback by the question and replied: “Sadly, yes, I am. Um, also very gay, though.”

@wowrealneat
Dear New Seasons Parking Lot Girl, you’re so cool and ily ❤️ #fyp #portland #parkinglot #xoxo

He told the woman he was flattered and that asking never hurts. "You're just so handsome," she replied. Frazier returned the compliment, calling her "pretty," and the two shared a laugh and went their separate ways.

But the interaction stuck with Frazier. He thought it took real "guts" to tell a stranger you think they're attractive. He also felt that it was "kind" and "flattering" for her to compliment him. "She seemed like such a genuine and kind and earnest" and "cool" person, he said in the video.

He hoped the TikTok video he made would eventually reach her somehow. “You have uplifted me in a way that I didn’t know I needed, and it made me feel amazing, and I just wanted to say thank you and I hope you have such an incredible weekend,” Frazier told the woman through his post.

He also invited her to get a “friend coffee.”

Five weeks after Frazier posted the video, it successfully reached its intended audience of one. It was seen by Tifanie Mayberry, the woman driving the Tesla. She shared a reaction video where she watched Frazier’s original post. The video received over 11 million views.

@tifaniemayberry
#duet with @David #fyp WOW!! Never expected for this to come back around like this. OMG. The internet is internetting and I LOVE it!!

Mayberry followed the reaction video up with another, explaining that her behavior in the parking lot that day was a perfect example of where she is in life. She’s 35, single and ready to settle down and have kids. If that means she has to be a little forward in approaching men, so be it.

"So what you're witnessing is me just being like no BS and being 'like okay if I see me a good one, I just like to lasso them, and reel 'em in’ and be like 'Hey, I'm interested,' and that's just kind of where I am in life. And apparently, this one got back to me in a very unexpected way,” she said.

Mayberry added that she has yet to speak with Frazier but is looking forward to meeting him. She hopes that one day he’ll even make it to her wedding.

@tifaniemayberry
Well its been a very funny ending to 2023, and I have to say it ended things on such a great note for me 🥹❤️✨ Thanks TikTok!! @David - Coffee in the New Year?!

This article originally appeared in January.

From Your Site Articles

lgbtq

Heroes

Tired of being humiliated, these girls fought the sexist school dress code. And won.

"In a way, you're telling [a girl] that boys are more entitled to their education than she is."

Deanna Wolf/Facebook

Four middle-schoolers sat at the podium. Poised. Confident. Ready to challenge the Portland Public Schools board on its dress code.

Four teenagers stand at a wooden podium at a school board meeting Four students from Portland, Oregon, testified in front of the board in May 2015Image via PPS Communications/YouTube.

AnaLuiza, a seventh-grader, told a story of a friend who was pulled aside one day for wearing a skirt deemed to be too short.

The friend sat in the principal's office for hours while the staff tried to get ahold of her parents. She missed important classwork, and worse yet, felt humiliated by the ordeal.

"The only reason I go to school is to get my education," AnaLuiza told the board. "When I get dressed in the morning, my intention is not to provoke or be sexualized. My intention is to feel comfortable in my own skin."

Sophia, also in seventh grade at the time, spoke last.

"My problem with the dress code is that 100% of the students that get sent home are female. ... In a way, you're telling [a girl] that boys are more entitled to their education than she is. And I don't think that's acceptable."

They were absolutely right. Because if you're a preteen or teenage girl in America, you can get a dress code violation for almost anything: showing your midriff, shoulder, collarbone, leg, bra strap, or, in some cases, for just wearing something as harmless as spaghetti straps.

Girl with blonde hair wearing a tank top and sweater and jeans Stephanie Hughes of Kentucky was cited for a dress code violation for this outfit, which sometimes shows her collarbone. Photo by Stacie Dunn/Facebook

Girls who violate their schools' dress codes are accused of being distractions and are often humiliated in front of their classmates.

They're then either sent home to change (missing valuable class time) or forced to cover up with "shame clothes," like old sweatpants that have been lying around the guidance counselor's office for who knows how long.

This has been a problem for years, and a particularly frustrating one to solve. Almost everyone agrees schools need some kind of dress code, but almost no one can agree on what that should look like.

A girl at school wearing loose fitting shirt and black leggings Deanna Wolf of Alabama says her 15-year-old daughter missed an entire class period simply for wearing leggings and a loose-fitting shirt.Deanna Wolf/Facebook

But now, thanks to these brave Portland students and a couple of key community members, we might finally be making some progress.

The school board, to the surprise of many, agreed the dress code needed fixing. But that didn't mean it would be easy.

A committee was formed, including Sophia (one of the girls who testified in front of the board), parents, teachers, and other community leaders. Lisa Frack, president of the Oregon chapter of the National Organization of Women, and a parent, was one of them.

Frack said some issues were easy to fix, like the ban on spaghetti straps. That was quick to go. Others? Not so much.

There was plenty of back-and-forth. Are short shorts OK? How about cleavage? What about all of the subtle (and not-so-subtle) policies that unfairly target students of color?

A girl in yellow shirt smiling at the camera Marian Wilson-Reed of Texas says her 9-year-old daughter was pulled out of class because school administrators thought her natural hairstyle looked like a mohawk, which was against the rules.Marian Wilson-Reed/Facebook

Then there was the issue of enforcement. Although hopefully, with the new dress code, there would be fewer violations, the committee wanted to find ways to eliminate shaming and missed class time for students who broke the rules.

Despite debate on some of these specific issues, Frack said, the conversation always came back to the same basic point.

Some board members "felt like they wanted a little line in there reminding everyone that this is a learning institution. But that's exactly what we're trying to get away from," Frack said.

"We don't want to link clothing and learning. ... You can't learn math better or worse whether you have a tie on or a collared shirt or a tank top."

"We're going to basically have people covering what you have to do to not be naked."

The final approved dress code, one of only a few like it in the U.S., was a major improvement. But perhaps just as important was the conversation sparked by the process.

Gone was phrasing that specifically targeted bare midriffs, "plunging necklines," or "sexually suggestive clothing." The new, gender-neutral code essentially asks that students wear a top and a bottom (or a dress), and that their clothes not show profanity or reference drugs.

It's pretty simple. But the conversations that led to this point were anything but.

"It raised the issue of people's discomfort with how girls are objectified in this country. Is it a solution to tell them to cover up?" Frack said. She even recalled some of the adult members of the advisory committee having trouble talking about things like breasts and sexuality with a straight face — which, she said, is part of the problem.

For now, though, Frack just hopes this code can serve as a model to other districts looking to get with the times. Portland just rolled out the new policy in the fall of 2016, so it remains to be seen how it'll fare — especially when the weather gets hot again.

But so far, Frack said, all she's heard from parents is how happy their kids are to be free to be themselves without judgment.

This article originally appeared on 9.1.16

From Your Site Articles

The story behind the World's Smallest Park is even more delightful than you'd expect.

Like any good dreamer, Dick Fagan spent time writing, listening, and staring out his office window, a detail which is important to this story.

More than 70 years ago, from his desk on the second floor at The Oregon Journal, Fagan noticed a small, round concrete traffic median on top of which a traffic signal would be installed. Construction eventually wrapped up on the median, but no light or traffic signal ever went in.

Soon, the bare space grew thick with weeds and neglect.

After watching the space go unattended, Fagan went down to the median himself, cleared the weeds and trash, and planted some flowers.

Mill Ends Park from above. Photo by Don Ryan/AP.

He called it Mill Ends Park, after his popular newspaper column of the same name ("mill ends" are the odd, rough pieces of lumber often left over and discarded at mills).

On St. Patrick's Day in 1948, Fagan held a dedication ceremony and declared Mill Ends to be the World's Smallest Park.

Fagan, a proud Irishman, used his column to describe the "goings-on" at the tiny park, sharing whimsical tales of an active leprechaun colony led by head leprechaun, Patrick O'Toole.

He continued writing about the park and its fantastical inhabitants until his death in 1969. Shortly before he died, the city held a rededication ceremony for Mill Ends, complete with city council members, a ribbon cutting, an Irish pipe band, and an Irish dance group.

A local group gifted Fagan a permanent cement enclosure for the park, complete with stadium turf and a handmade leprechaun statue. Fagan was too ill to attend the ceremony and passed away just a few weeks later.

Mill Ends Park lives on to this day and has even earned international recognition.

Since 1976, Mill Ends has been an official Portland city park.

At 452.16 square inches (about the size of a laundry basket) it holds the Guinness Book of Records title for the world’s smallest park.

Mill Ends Park in 2007. Photo by brx0/Flickr.

Though it was moved briefly for roadwork, Mill Ends Park still sits in the median at the intersection of what is now Naito Parkway and Taylor Street.

The city looks after it, replacing the small tree and plants as needed, just as it would any other public park.

Mill Ends Park in 2017. Photo by Erin Canty/Upworthy.

Tourists and locals alike are encouraged to visit.

Just keep an eye out for traffic.

Photo by Erin Canty/Upworthy.

Over the years, the park has seen improvements like a butterfly swimming pool, a tiny ferris wheel delivered via full-size crane, and even dinosaurs.

Last stop of the trip. Someone filled this tiny park with dinosaurs!
A post shared by TC Harrison (@tcorama) on Aug 31, 2015 at 1:08pm PDT

After all these years, it's still a great spot for the occasional picnic...

The List having a morning laugh and a delicious breakfast in the worlds smallest park in Portland, OR. It was nice having the park to yourself for a change. #MillEndsPark
A post shared by The List (@thelistroadtrip) on Oct 10, 2016 at 12:29pm PDT

...or even a protest.

In 2011, the leprechauns joined forces with demonstrators and hosted what is likely the smallest Occupy Portland event on record.

Mill Ends Park during Occupy Portland. Photos by Another Believer/Wikimedia Commons.

What began as Fagan's simple effort to beautify a forgotten space has now become a world-class (albeit odd) landmark.

Yes, it's one of the many things that "keeps Portland weird," but it's also a living tribute to ingenuity and creativity. Never doubt what one dreamer can do with a little potting soil and a lot of imagination.

Allison Wildman crouches low to get a photo. Photo by Don Ryan/AP.

This 2-year-old with Down syndrome is breaking down stereotypes around child modeling.

True

Tiffany Stafford was flipping through a catalog when she saw a Target advertisement that floored her.

Her two sons, ages 6 and 8, immediately pointed out the model, saying “Mom, she looks just like Sissy!"

Tiffany had never seen something like this before: The child model had Down syndrome, just like her 2-year-old daughter Ellie.

Tiffany's crew (from left): Luke, Ellie, and Will. All photos via Tiffany Stafford, used with permission.

Then she started thinking about Ellie. She's friendly; she's playful; she loves to show off her favorite poses — the idea made sense.

After giving it some thought, Tiffany sent in photos of Ellie to modeling agencies, thinking, “It's worth a shot."

She reached out to agents near Aurora, Oregon, where she lives, and ended up connecting with an agent and ultimately getting Ellie signed to a modeling agency for print publications.

She was excited about the modeling idea for several reasons. First, she knew that Ellie loved being in front of the camera. But, second, and just as important, she believed Ellie would inspire children with disabilities and their parents.

In August 2015, Ellie booked her first campaign for Hooray Haroo, a children's clothing brand based in Portland, Oregon.

“Ellie is such a natural," Tiffany said. “She has some go-to poses like pushing her shoulder up, or putting her finger to her cheek ... we call that her 'model pose.'"

In modeling mode.

One of the best surprises came from the people who saw the advertisements. Tiffany received tons of love from family and friends, and eventually even from media outlets. KGW Portland interviewed her to do a story on Ellie, and a few days later she received a call from a friend that the story had been picked up by USA Today.

Tiffany says a lot of Ellie's success came about after she saw the inspiring work of the nonprofit organization Changing the Face of Beauty.

The group aims to get people of all abilities into mainstream advertisements and media, and they were able to collaborate on a campaign.

Tiffany is an advisory board member of the Down Syndrome Diagnosis Network and has recently joined forces with Changing the Face of Beauty to launch the campaign “Who's Next?" which encourages individuals with disabilities and their families to call out retailers and suggest they be more inclusive in their advertisements.

The less-serious side of modeling.

Tiffany doesn't want to push Ellie into a certain career.

She's not obsessed with the idea of raising a fashion icon (it's fine if Ellie doesn't want to be a model).

But for the moment, she is excited to help battle the stigma around having a developmental disability.

Tiffany's hope?

That the next generation will be even more understanding and loving toward people of all abilities.

Why Oregon's largest college is hosting its first Whiteness History Month.

Whiteness is very much a thing. That much we know.

GIF via Snuggie.

But whiteness is not simply "being white." Whiteness refers to the often invisible yet elaborate and pervasive system of privilege afforded to white people in our country and much of the world. Those with privilege, whether they want to or not, receive advantages and decision-making power in the media, private sector, judicial system, and policymaking. The idea of whiteness is ingrained in our systems and ways of thinking, and it has numerous cultural, economic, and legal consequences.

As far as cities go, it doesn't get much whiter than Portland, Oregon.

Photo by iStock.

As a new resident of Portland, I've quickly learned it's much more than brunch, beer, and bikes. Portland is home to great soccer, delicious food, and so, so, so many white people.

In fact, 76% of Portland is white, making Portland the whitest big city in the United States.

That's why for the first time ever, Portland Community College is offering a Whiteness History Month.

Developed by a subcommittee of the PCC Cascade Campus Diversity Council, the project, officially titled Whiteness History Month: Context, Consequences, and Change, is a month of programs and events to explore the origins of whiteness and its impact on the campus community and culture.

To be clear, Whiteness History Month is not a celebration of white power and privilege, nor is it Black History Month for white people.

The goal of Whiteness History Month is not to open old wounds or point fingers for the heck of it. Instead, the goal of the project is to develop new solutions to societal and community problems that are born of racism and privilege.

Big problems like over-policing, and small problems like the fact that when I went looking for a stock photo of a "college classroom" the first photo that came up was literally all white students:

Photo by iStock.

PCC's planning committee is currently soliciting programming ideas from students, faculty, and the community for the month-long event.

PCC is Oregon's largest post-secondary educational institution, serving over 90,000 students across four campuses and eight specialized centers. Programming for Whiteness History Month, to be held this April, will take place at all four campuses and may include discussions, lectures, films, presentations, artwork, and even plays.

It's all in an effort to spark dialogue, improve campus climate, promote student retention, and build partnerships in the community.

"Join us! When they're not shooting at us, it's fun over here." Photo by iStock.

Though the goals are admirable, some are calling the month-long diversity initiative "white-shaming."

GIF via Erykah Badu's "On & On."

And sadly, those voices are missing the point.

Whiteness History Month is not an attempt to shame white people for colonialism, racism, or even having privilege.

It is, however, an effort to get a very important conversation happening — one that is often derailed because we have difficulty talking about race or prefer to advocate for "colorblindness."

But when unarmed black people, even children, are gunned down by the police; when black people continue to die in jail cells under suspicious circumstances; when applicants with "ethnic-sounding" names are less likely to get job interviews; when being black is akin to having a credit score 71 points lower in the eyes of mortgage lenders; when transgender women of color are murdered at an alarming rate; when not one person of color is nominated for an acting Academy Award; when people in the 21st century are still dressing in black face; when protestors have to block shoppers and travelers to get people to pay attention to their messages; when I wake up every day as a woman of color hoping my name's not a hashtag by sundown, maybe, just maybe there's a problem here.

We can't fix racism until we can talk about how going through life with white skin is different from going through life with dark skin, and Whiteness History Month seeks to open the doors to exploring those differences so that we can at least have those conversations.

Demonstrators marching for an end to gun violence and the resignation of Chicago mayor Rahm Emanuel. Photo by Scott Olson/Getty Images.

Racism is in our neighborhoods, our courtrooms, our boardrooms. Much of it stems from whiteness and the inequality it creates and perpetuates, knowingly or not. We're not going to be able to tackle those problems until we acknowledge that the system isn't set up for everyone to get a fair shot.

As #BlackLivesMatter activist DeRay Mckesson suggests, those with privilege need to acknowledge it exists and use it to signal boost voices that too often go unheard.

While the name could use some work, Whiteness History Month has the potential to raise awareness of this important issue.

Portland Community College, a major employer and place of higher learning for the Pacific Northwest, deserves applause for taking bold steps to address the problem of racism and oppression in the campus community.

Real change isn't going to happen until we have some tough conversations and begin working together.

This inaugural event may not bring an end to all racism everywhere (that's a very tall order) but it's a much needed start.

A woman holds a sign with a quote from MLK during a march on Martin Luther King Jr. Day in St. Louis, Missouri. Photo by Michael B. Thomas/AFP/Getty Images.