upworthy

popular names

A group of school kids in New York City.

The funny thing about baby names is that they are incredibly personal and also entirely dependent on current trends. Baby name experts say that there is roughly a 100-year trend where specific names become extremely popular and then become “old people names” until they are brought back by a younger generation who finds them cool.

A TikToker named Laura, who lives in Brooklyn, New York, noticed that parents in her borough, which is known for being a bit ahead of the cultural curve, have pivoted to giving their children traditional baby names. She believes this trend is a counter to another popular trend in baby names: “Trajedeighs” or giving children relatively common names with quirky, unconventional spellings such as Zackiri (Zacahry), Bittneigh (Brittany), or Ashleigh (Ashly).

@laurainbk

What are baby names like these days where you live? #babynames #names #nametrends #babyname #baby

Are traditional names making a comeback?

“We got my two-year-old daughter's class list, and it kind of made me laugh because, while in some parts of the country, people are naming their kids like Breighlynn and Braxleigh and Peightyn and whatever, I guess, in Brooklyn, we're going in the complete opposite direction,” Laura shared in her video.

Here are some of the names of kids in her daughter's class:

Edith

Oscar

Arthur

Nicholas

Bonnie

Owen

Henry

Ruby

Lewis

The post inspired many people in the comments to share updates on the name trends in their area. “I heard this joke that the preschool classes in NYC are the same as the boat passenger list at Ellis Island,” a commenter wrote.

“Mind you, I'm in California and my kids friends are Coyote, Denver, Sahara, Dior, Storm, Silver, Story, Velvet, Lion,” a Californian wrote. “Seattle Preschool teacher here. I had a class with Edith, Eleanor, Ernestine, Ruby, and Louise once. Called them my old lady gang,” a teacher in Seattle wrote.


Why do names rise and fall in popularity?

This unique cultural back and forth, where society collectively makes a name popular and then once it reaches its peak, abandons it altogether, is known as “frequency-dependent selection.” It works for names, as well as dog breeds. Historically, certain dog breeds have risen in popularity, such as Dalmatians in the 1940s or Rottweilers in the 1990s, only to fall out of favor once they become too trendy.

“Frequency-dependent selection is just a fancy way of saying that there is a pressure to be the same or different,” Mitchell Newberry, an assistant professor of complex systems at the University of Michigan, told Vice. “If a name gets too popular, then people don’t want to use it anymore, and there’s pressure to be different.” In fact, when we look at baby name trends, you can see that they follow a very predictable trajectory. A step rise in popularity, a brief plateau, and then a decline that was almost as rapid as its ascent.

The predictable cycles in baby names and dog breed popularity are eye-opening because they make you wonder how often we make authentic choices in life. How many of the decisions that we make are based on either joining the crowd or intentionally running in the opposite direction? If all we do is simply react to the behaviors of others, when are we truly being ourselves?

Education

How much does your name affect your life? More than you might think.

A few things for parents to ponder when deciding what to name a child.

What we're named makes a difference.

"What's in a name?" Juliet famously asked Romeo, telling him a rose would smell just as sweet even if it were called something else. Is it really true, though? For Shakespeare's star-crossed lovers, names were a barrier, so of course they didn't want them to matter. But just as Romeo and Juliet's last names directly affected their love story, the names we are given and go by have an impact in our lives in ways we may scarcely be aware of.

Research from around the world shows that what people call us can influence what others think of us, and what personality traits we develop, and even what big life decisions we make for ourselves. That's not to say you can direct someone's life entirely by giving them a certain name, but there are some things prospective parents who are weighing baby name options might want to consider.

- YouTubeyoutu.be


Certain names come with certain stereotypes

Our names influence how people see us, for better or for worse.

I have no hard evidence, but I'd bet dollars to donuts that very few babies born in the 2020s will be named Karen, solely because of the get-me-the-manager stereotype that's been attached to the name. The name Chad may have met a similar fate for this generation of baby boys, but there will undoubtedly be other names that get taken down by popular culture.

Fair or not, certain names conjure up certain stereotypes. Psychologist Michael Varnum, PhD, shared some results from a 2018 study of 400 Americans that examined how certain names are perceived based on traits like warmth and competence. For example:

Elizabeth = seen as high in both warmth and competence

Misty = seen as low in both warmth and competence

Riley = seen as high in warmth, low in competence

Ruth = seen as low in warmth, high in competence

Names even come with physical stereotypes, and a 2017 study from Hebrew University of Jerusalem found that people can guess what a person's name is based solely on how they look with much more accuracy than mere chance.

how our names impact usNames affect how people perceive us.Photo credit: Canva

Our names might influence decisions we make

If your name is Dennis, are you more likely to be dentist than someone named Josh? If your name is Kelly, would you be more likely to donate Hurricane Katrina victims than someone named Molly?

Oddly enough, research basically says yes. In the aggregate, people tend to make decisions about their lives that align with the first letter of their name. Study results indicate that to move to states that resemble their names, choose careers that begin with the first letter of their name, choose brand names that share phonetic qualities with their own names, choose romantic partners that have similar last names, contribute to politicians with names that start with the same letter as their own name, etc.

Yes, one study even found that people whose names shared an initial with a hurricane name were more likely to donate to that hurricane's disaster relief efforts than others.

Again, these study findings are in aggregate, so we can't draw any individual conclusions based on any individual's name, but those findings indicate that names do make a difference.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

Our names can reveal our cultural identities

If you see the names Jerry, Juan, Jakob, Jayvon, and Jahan, you likely picture a different ethnicity or race or cultural identity for each one. Names are cultural, there's no question about it, and that reality can mean different things in different contexts.

There's the famous research showing that resumes with "white-sounding" names were more likely to be called for interviews over resumes with non-white names, despite have the exact same qualifications. So our names being associated with cultural or racial identities can result in discrimination when people's prejudices, whether conscious or unconscious, get in the way.

But race and ethnicity aren't the only cultural elements our names can reveal. Whether you have a traditional name or a unique name can reveal information about your family culture, such as whether or not your family or your community are more or less individualistic. Research shows that more unique names are more common among regions of the U.S. that were more recently part of the frontier, and that countries that are more individualistic tend to have more uncommon names. So even if your name is something your parents conjured out of thin air, it may not be as hard as you might think to narrow down some cultural information about you based just on your unique name.

man holding up a name tagDoes it really matter what your name is?Photo credit: Canva

It matters whether you like your name or not

One of the most interesting, though perhaps not surprising, findings in studies on names is that people who don't like their names tend to be less psychologically well-adjusted than those who like their names. Since our names are attached to our identities in a direct way, dissatisfaction with one's name would logically correlate with negative feelings about oneself and vice versa.

But it doesn't take an official study to know that going through life with a name you don't like would just stink. Thankfully, our names aren't written in stone. I've known several people who have changed their name in adulthood, deciding they were done being called a name that didn't suit them for whatever reason.

There's no way to predict what the next "Karen" will be or to know whether a child will actually like the name they're given or not, so parents must strike a balance between being thoughtful about naming a child and being overly anxious about getting it wrong. In the end, if a name turns out to be a poor choice, it can always be changed. Life's too short to fret over a name, and it's also too short to keep one you hate.

Family

Husband is certain wife’s baby name will cause too much pain for their child. Is he wrong?

"It's going to cause him major problems with passports and ID as well as job and college applications."

A father can't handle the name his wife chose for the baby.

It’s one thing to debate with your spouse over giving your child a name that is so unique it could cause them trouble. It’s another to fight with your spouse over giving your child a name that is so incredibly common it’s used as a placeholder when an unidentified man has passed away.

This was the problem a Reddit user (The_Doeberman), whose last name is Doe, faced when his wife wanted to name their baby boy after her grandfather, John.

“My wife is six months pregnant and wants to name our future son after her grandfather, who died of cancer in September. His name was John,” the husband wrote on the AITA forum

“I liked her grandfather, and I know he and my wife were very close, but I won't even consider it, not even for our son's middle name,” he continued. “I feel that's just setting him up for a world of problems, especially when he grows up and has to apply for jobs. Nobody's going to believe ‘John Doe’ is his real name.”


The wife thought that the husband was being difficult for vetoing the name and claimed he was “exaggerating” the issues the child would face.

But he has a pretty strong argument. The name John Doe is synonymous with the unclaimed dead body that someone finds in a roadside motel in the middle of nowhere or an anonymous victim of trauma that can’t be named in court documents. It’s also often used as a placeholder, which could cause the child problems when applying for college or a job.



There is no exact answer to why John Doe was chosen to represent the “everyman,” but it has been used in the UK for hundreds of years. It’s believed because John Doe was a popular name at the time. Later, in the US, unidentified females would come to be known as Jane Doe.

The husband used Reddit’s AITA page to ask whether he was in the wrong and the commenters were overwhelmingly supportive of him.

One commenter thought that "John Doe" was a bad idea but gave a solution that could work for the wife. “People will think it's a fake name. It's going to cause him major problems with passports and ID as well as job and college applications. He may have issues with medical stuff etc.,” they wrote. Instead, they suggested using an alternative version of “John” from another language.

“As an example only: Look for other languages' version of John. For example Eoin is the Irish way of spelling Owen. Eoin in itself is the Irish version of John…” they wrote.


Another commenter was blunt about their objection.

“I'm not superstitious, but I'd feel uncomfortable having a kid whose name basically stands for ‘found dead in the park, stab wound to the chest, no ID,’” they added.

One commenter noted all of the legal troubles that could come with having the name John Doe.

“I imagine a lifetime of getting stopped by the TSA for enhanced screening, of job applications being tossed for being fake and just everything being harder than it should be because you have a fake name,” they wrote. “If giving him the grandfather's name is so important, why not give him the grandpa's middle name?”

In the end, it's touching for a mother to name their newborn son after her grandfather, but according to the father and a legion of people online, “John Doe” simply carries too much baggage and would be more of a hindrance than a tribute. The good news is that there are many ways that the wife can pay homage to her grandfather that won’t make her son’s life more difficult.