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I told a kid a riddle my dad told me when I was 7. His answer proves how far we've come.

This classic riddle takes on new meaning as our world changes for the better.




When I was 7, my dad told me a riddle.

"A man and his son are driving in their car when they are hit by a tractor-trailer.

Photo via iStock.

(We were driving at the time, so of course this was the riddle he decided to tell.)

The father dies instantly.

The son is badly injured. Paramedics rush him to the hospital.

Photo via iStock.

As he is being wheeled into the operating room, the surgeon takes one look the boy and says:

'I can't operate on him. He's my son.'

How is that possible?!"

Without missing a beat, I answered:


"The doctor is his mom!"

Photo via iStock.

My dad first heard the riddle when he was a child in the '60s.

Back then, most women didn't work outside of the home.

Few of those who did had college degrees, much less professional degrees.

Female doctors were few and far between.

Back then, it was a hard riddle. A very hard riddle.

By 1993, when I first heard it, the notion that women could be highly skilled, highly trained professionals wasn't so absurd.

To me, it was normal.

I knew women who were lawyers. Bankers. Politicians. My own doctor was a woman.

To be sure, women still faced challenges and discrimination in the workplace. And even 20 years later, they still do.

But at its core, the riddle is about how a family can work. And that had changed. Long-overdue progress had rendered the big, sexist assumption that underpinned the whole thing moot.

A very hard riddle was suddenly not a riddle at all.

I never forgot it.

Now, I'm 30 — almost as old as my dad was he first told me that riddle.

My dad at 30 (left) and me at 30. Photos by Eric March/Upworthy and Mary March, used with permission.

I don't have kids, but I mentor a child through a volunteer program.

Once a week, we get together and hang out for an hour. We play ping pong, do science experiments, and write songs. Neither of us like to go outside.

It's a good match.

One day, we decided to try to stump each other with riddles.

He rattled off about five or six.

I could only remember one: The one about the man, his son, and the surgeon.

Photo via iStock.

I thought it would be silly to tell it.

I was sure that, if it was easy in 1993, it would be even easier in 2014. Kind of ridiculous, even.

But a part of me was curious.

It had been 21 years — almost as long as it had been between when my dad first heard the riddle and when he shared it with me.

Maybe it wouldn't be so easy.

Maybe I was missing something obvious, making my own flawed assumptions about how a family could work.

Maybe the world had changed in ways that would be second nature to a 13-year-old but not to me.

So I began:

"A man and his son are driving in their car, when they are hit by a tractor-trailer. The father dies instantly. The son is badly injured and is rushed to the hospital by paramedics. As he is being wheeled into the operating room, the surgeon takes one look at the boy and says:

'I can't operate on him. He's my son.'

How is that possible?!"

Without missing a beat, he answered: "it's his other dad"

Photo via iStock.

Times change. Progress isn't perfect. But no matter what shape a family takes, at the end of the day, #LoveWins.


This article was written by Eric March and originally appeared on 06.21.16

The world has come a long way in the past few decades when it comes to acceptance of people in the LGBTQ+ community. Those of us who grew up in pre-millennial generations remember a very different time, when hiding one's sexual orientation or identity was the norm, homophobic jokes barely batted an eye, and seeing someone living an "out and proud" life was far less common than it is today.

That was the world Dan Levy grew up in. The Schitt's Creek actor and co-creator was born in 1983, and on the day of the series finale of Schitt's Creek, his mom Deborah Divine shared a tweet that perfectly encapsulates not only the changes we've seen in society since then, but the impact Levy himself has had on that world.

She wrote:


"Today I regret every single second of worry back in the uninformed 80's-wondering how the world was going to treat my brilliant little boy who loved to twirl. Little did I know that he was going to kick that old world's ass to the curb and create a brand new one."

Oof, my heart.

It's difficult to measure the mark Dan Levy (and family) made with the hit TV show Schitt's Creek, but it's significant. It's not like we hadn't seen LGBTQ+ representation on television before—we just hadn't seen it quite like this. In most shows with LGBTQ+ characters, their identity was either a conflict or a punchline, as were people's reactions to them. Generally speaking, homophobia has dominated the storyline of such characters, whether it played out in comedy or drama.

In Schitt's Creek, Levy created a world where there was no homophobia. It just didn't exist amongst the characters in the show. The closest we came to seeing it was when Patrick was worried about how his parents would react to finding out he had a boyfriend, but that turned out to be a momentary fear that was immediately squelched by his parents' unreserved acceptance.

The rest of the time, all we saw in the town of Schitt's Creek was an embracing of the characters for who they were, quirky outfits notwithstanding. What we experienced in that world was an example of what the world could be.

And it was done with simple storytelling. The romcom sweetness David and Patrick's relationship from "meet cute" to marriage was something we've rarely seen with a same-sex couple on screen. Honestly, the joyful normalness of it all probably did more to help people understand and accept gay relationships than most overt activism ever could. Activism is important for advocating for rights and justice, but those battles are a lot easier to fight when people's hearts are on your side. And people's hearts are what Dan Levy has played a role in changing most.

He comes by it honestly. In a speech for GLAAD last year, Levy said that his family's unconditional love and support—as exemplified by his mom's tweet—were what made him feel safe to come out at 18.

Dan Levy reflects on creating Schitt's Creek, “A place where everybody fits in."youtu.be

"Had I not had the love to give me a sense of security, I don't know if I would have found my way out of the closet, let alone create the opportunity for myself to tell stories on television that have effected some kind of positive change in the world," he said. "Support, encouragement and love: three relatively simple acts of kindness that can change the course of a person's life."

For six seasons, Levy showed us a world where everyone embraces those three simple acts of kindness, so everyone is safe. What a wonderful world that turned out to be for all of us.

via Gage Skidmore / Flickr

There's a post that conservatives are sharing on Facebook that aims to make it seem like they are tolerant people, but they've been pushed to the point where they've decided to become a bigot.

Who pushed them too far? The LGBT community, people of color, liberals, and immigrants.

The post is clearly a total "Sorry, not sorry," post that attempts to have things both ways. It essentially says, "I was tolerant of those who aren't white, straight, and conservative, but I've become intolerant of them because they are destroying my way of life."




via Reddit

[Note: There are different versions of this post that say: "I have never cared if you were well off, or poor, because I've been both, until you started calling me names for working hard and bettering myself" and "I've never cared if you don't like guns until you tried to take my guns away."]

Who in the world is calling people names for working hard? Also, it's a little self-aggrandizing for someone to pat their own back by bragging about working hard and bettering themselves. But, hey, puffing yourself up is what Facebook is for.

Whoever shares the post is also looking to be praised for their toughness, "my patience and tolerance are gone." Congratulations on being so thin-skinned.

The post is also inadvertently funny because it says, "I never cared you were gay until you started shoving it down my throat." Now, what exactly was shoved down this person's throat and did they enjoy it or not? That reveal would make for a much more entertaining post.

So, what happened now grandpa?

The post also assumes that the LGBT community, people of color, liberals, and immigrants are all fighting against straight, white conservatives in an attempt to ruin their lives. When, in reality, most of the activists are simply fighting for equality.

There are extremists in all movements, so to paint each group with such broad-strokes shows a real lack of experience.

via Netflix


via Netflix

LGBT people aren't trying to turn straight people into drag queens. Protesting against systemic inequality isn't about blaming others people for your problems, it's about highlighting inequity and attempting to correct it.

And where does the original poster get the idea that immigrants are trying to erase anyone's history?

Someone came up with the perfect response to the "I don't care" post by pointing out the fact that the person who wrote the manifesto probably has supported Republican policies that have oppressed immigrants, people of color, and the LGBT community.

Naturally, these policies have encouraged liberals to fight back.

via Reddit

The poster does a great job of explaining how the person who "never cared" really does care about the rights of people who aren't like him or her.

People on the right love to talk about freedom, but it's more like, "freedom for me but not for thee." They are vocal about the freedom to own a gun, run a business without interference, and pay less in taxes to the state.

But they conveniently neglect the freedom for people to love who they choose, live where they want, and do what they wish with their bodies.

People who truly value liberty want it for those they disagree with as well.

In today's politically divided America, tolerance is a value that we need a lot more and more of, regardless of one's political affiliation. So, how about an "I never cared" post that goes something like this?

"You know folks, I never cared you were gay until I saw that gays, lesbians, and bisexuals are almost five times as likely to have attempted suicide, compared to heterosexual youth. So I stood up for your rights.

I never cared what color you were until I learned that Black people are up to six times more likely to be killed by police, so I marched alongside you.

I never cared about your political affiliation, until I realized it is a reflection of your values, so I listened. I also appreciated it when you listened to me when I shared my views.

I didn't care where you were from until I learned you were a refugee that came to America to provide your family with safety and opportunity.

I am not alone in feeling like this, there are millions more of us who feel like this, and we are going to change the world so it's a more tolerant, safe, and free place for all of us."

This morning, the U.S. Supreme Court issued a historic ruling that protects LGBTQ+ people from workplace discrimination. In the 6-3 ruling, two conservative-leaning justices, Neil Gorsuch and John Roberts, joined the four liberal-leaning judges in the decision. Gorsuch himself wrote the Supreme Court opinion.

The courts are supposed to be objective, so labeling justices as "conservative" and "liberal" always feels a bit reductive. But we live in a highly partisan era and it would be naive to ignore the politicized underpinnings of judicial appointments—especially in high-profile cases like this one, with a 5-4 split along conservative/liberal lines, which wouldn't have been surprising.

So how did these two conservative judges end up ruling in favor of the LGBTQ+ community, which is generally viewed as a liberal stance?

In a nutshell, they didn't. Not explicitly anyway.


The basis of the ruling isn't actually about legal protection based on sexual orientation or gender identity itself. In the opinion, Gorsuch explains that Title VII of the Civil Rights Act of 1964 prohibits workplace discrimination based on "race, color, religion, sex, [and] national origin." What the court determined was that the "sex" part of the law is what LGBTQ+ workplace discrimination cases really boils down to.

"If the employer intentionally relies in part on an individual employee's sex when deciding to discharge the employee—put differently, if changing the employee's sex would have yielded a different choice by the employer—a statutory violation has occurred," Gorsuch wrote in the 27-page opinion.

The entire opinion includes specific precedents and arguments against dissents issued by the other conservative justices, but the gist of the ruling is summed up in these two paragraphs:

"An individual's homosexuality or transgender status is not relevant to employment decisions. That's because it is impossible to discriminate against a person for being homosexual or transgender without discriminating against that individual based on sex. Consider, for example, an employer with two employees, both of whom are attracted to men. The two individuals are, to the employer's mind, materially identical in all respects, except that one is a man and the other a woman. If the employer fires the male employee for no reason other than the fact he is attracted to men, the employer discriminates against him for traits or actions it tolerates in his female colleague. Put differently, the employer intentionally singles out an employee to fire based in part on the employee's sex, and the affected employee's sex is a but-for cause of his discharge. Or take an employer who fires a transgender person who was identified as a male at birth but who now identifies as a female. If the employer retains an otherwise identical employee who was identified as female at birth, the employer intentionally penalizes a person identified as male at birth for traits or actions that it tolerates in an employee identified as female at birth. Again, the individual employee's sex plays an unmistakable and impermissible role in the discharge decision.

That distinguishes these cases from countless others where Title VII has nothing to say. Take an employer who fires a female employee for tardiness or incompetence or simply supporting the wrong sports team. Assuming the employer would not have tolerated the same trait in a man, Title VII stands silent. But unlike any of these other traits or actions, homosexuality and transgender status are inextricably bound up with sex. Not because homosexuality or transgender status are related to sex in some vague sense or because discrimination on these bases has some disparate impact on one sex or another, but because to discriminate on these grounds requires an employer to intentionally treat individual employees differently because of their sex."

What's interesting about basing the ruling on sex discrimination—aside from the fact that it makes perfect sense within the letter of the law—is that it serves as a loophole, which these conservative justices are able to rule in favor of LGBTQ+ protection under the law without explicitly defending anyone's sexual orientation or gender identity. In other words, they don't have to voice support for the LGBTQ+ community anywhere in this opinion—the law regarding sex discrimination covers it.

Gorsuch summed up the opinion as such:

"Ours is a society of written laws. Judges are not free to overlook plain statutory commands on the strength of nothing more than suppositions about intentions or guesswork about expectations. In Title VII, Congress adopted broad language making it illegal for an employer to rely on an employee's sex when deciding to fire that employee. We do not hesitate to recognize today a necessary consequence of that legislative choice: An employer who fires an individual merely for being gay or transgender defies the law."

The court has concluded that "the law," as written,protects LGBTQ+ folks from discrimination because LGBTQ+ discrimination is inseparable from sex discrimination.

What's striking about this ruling is that it means these protections have already been in place for the past 56 years. In some ways, that makes the ruling more powerful than if new legislation had been passed adding specific language regarding sexual orientation and gender identity. On one hand, it sort of allows the court to skirt around the question of specific protections for LGBTQ+ people. On the other, it essentially reaches an arm around the LGBTQ+ community and sweeps them into the broad protections already guaranteed to everyone else.

With the argument being made by a conservative justice and signed off by another, that's a huge, historic statement and a big win for LGBTQ+ workers.