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emotional intelligence

Saying "I love you!" by accident is one of life's most cringe moments.

For many of us, telling our friends and family that we love them is second nature. Every time someone leaves the house, "Love you!" Before bed at night, "Love you!" Getting off a call with them, "Love you!"

That's all well and good until that sweetly ingrained habit spills over into your work life. Especially when you're talking to an important client, where the boundaries of professional conduct are particularly important to uphold. (Do you feel the cringe coming?)

I Love You Elf GIF by MOODMANGiphy

A woman shared an oh-so-human story about absent-mindedly telling a client she loved him, and his thoughtful response has people cheering.

"Accidentally said 'Love you!' at the end of a call with an important client yesterday," wrote a Reddit user. "I heard him giggle as I hung up, and I was mortified. Today, I saw he emailed me this:"

The email began, "Hey—Just wanted to say that I didn't mean to laugh at you when you accidentally signed off on our call with a 'love you.' I just found it funny because I've definitely done that before, and I know it happens."

Okay, phew, he understood that the laughing was mortifying and he wasn't bothered by the "love you." But then he added the absolute best thing he could have said about the situation:

"I'm glad you have enough love in your life that that response comes naturally. If anything, you should be proud of that. :)"

Then he mercifully resumed their professional conversation. "Have a great weekend! We'll follow up about my call with Chris on Wednesday, as discussed."

embarrassing story, saying I love you on accident, workplace stories, professional communication"Love you!" Oops.Photo credit: Canva

He didn't just ignore the elephant in the room and let it hang over her like an awkward cloud. He put her at ease, letting her know he's done it before and it happens and is no big deal. But then he took it a step further, adding a deeper human layer to the moment by acknowledging the fact that the words flowing so automatically and easily for her meant she was surrounded by love.

The client's emotional intelligence and thoughtful response warmed people's hearts.

"What a great and respectful response. He is completely right, it’s such a beautiful thing to have that much love in your life that it comes out naturally."

"You work with good people."

"Honestly, this made my day 😂 It's so wholesome how they responded. Shows that a little kindness (even accidental) always leaves a good impression!"

"Such a classy response. Made you feel at ease while staying professional and moving the conversation forward."

"Green flags from that client."

Green Flag GIF by The Last Talk ShowGiphy

People also shared their own similar experiences with blurting out accidental "love you"s and it was a veritable love-fest:

"I told my supervisor I loved her at the end of our weekly touch point call - she chuckled and said she loved me too. We shared a good laugh. I am happy to see empathy from a random human, it is much needed."

"I said 'love you' to my new boss at labcorp when she called me to tell me I passed my drug test. Same thing, hanging up, not thinking, she gave me my results and my start date to come in for orientation and I ended the call with 'bye love you!'"

"Back in the day I straight up called one of my bosses mom. It was so embarrassing I almost died."

"A surprising number of people have done this at least once. Happens when you’re distracted and tired. My ex husband (a prosecutor) accidentally ended a phone call with 'I love you' when talking to a rural county sheriff in the middle of the night."

Embarrassed Hide GIF by florGiphy

"I had a coworker say 'love you,' just as we were about to hang up. There was an awkward pause, clearly neither of us had hung up, then he added, 'Don’t tell my wife.' We both laughed and finally disconnected."

"I did that with my ex husband last Thursday, we both burst out laughing lol. Happily we get along great and he and his fiancée are attending my wedding next week."

"Was on phone with my boss right after he had called his wife. He ended the call with "love you." Had so much fun telling him that while I cared for him, I didn't think it was love."

Embarrassing moments don't have to ruin your day—in fact, when handled like this client, they can turn into beautiful moments of human connection. This kind of relatability, empathy, and emotional intelligence makes us all feel better about our shared humanity, oopsies and all.

Family

4-year-old's emotional intelligence is off the charts and people are giving kudos to his mom

The bedtime conversation between Aldie and his mom is incredible to witness.

Aldie knows how to articulate his emotions better than most adults.

Sometimes they even stand out from grownups. Take young Aldie, for example, whose ability to articulate his feelings exceeds many adults. When you find out he's barely 4 years old, hearing him calmly talk about his emotions and good choices is all the more remarkable.

Aldie's mom, Jonisa Padernos, tells Upworthy that she's felt he was "really special" since he started talking in full sentences at 20 months. "Believe it or not, he had no major tantrums in his toddler years because he was always able to express [himself] with his words," she says.


Padernos started young, asking Aldie questions and giving him time to answer without interrupting. "I’d always ask his opinion or feelings towards something and I don’t rush him to answer," she says. "I give him time and just listen. I make sure I also tell him how I feel and explain to him because I think kids copy us, and if we do that, they would think that it’s normal to feel all those emotions as long as you can express it with words and [are] able to process it."

Check out the conversation between Aldie and Padernos at bedtime as he goes through a recap of his emotions that day, which has racked up more than 17 million views on TikTok.

@mom_aldie

Bedtime conversation. The last part made me ❤️🥹 #fyp #momlife

The way Aldie shared what he was feeling about his mom not letting him go outside, how he helped his papa make a better choice with his emotions, and how he described the different emotions he feels is more than most adults can muster when they've had "a hard time doing emotions" during the day. And the way Padernos listens and reflects and reassures him is so, so beautiful.

People in the comments agreed.

"Emotionally intelligent, articulate and able to string super sophisticated sentences together," wrote one commenter on Instagram. "I taught 7-year-olds that weren’t this advanced - heck, most adults aren’t this emotionally intelligent. I have confidence in his future and the consequences are working beautifully Mama. We have to raise kids other people will like too. 😍👏"

"Wowwwww….. I’m so amazed by this baby’s EVERYTHING … the emotional intelligence, the vocabulary, empathy, the processing skills…all of it! ❤️❤️❤️❤️" wrote another.

"The most mature conversation I’ve heard about emotions - tbh I don’t think I’ve ever been as honest about my feelings as this little one was 🙌🏽 feeling so inspired by both of them. ♥️🫶🏽✨" shared another.

There's a lot that parents can do to help their children develop this kind of emotional intelligence, and this interaction between Aldie and his mom is a prime example.

"My advice is just be present, encourage kids to tell you how their day was or anything, listen and give them time to express without rushing," says Padernos. "Be patient, consistent and honest when communicating with them. Always remember that kids mirror us and so we have to show and express our emotions so they will be encouraged to also express their feelings to us. And when we get mad or frustrated, also let them know and explain why and apologize if you feel that you’ve let your emotions get in the way."

While not every child will be able to understand and articulate as clearly as Aldie did at such a young age, most kids are far more capable of understanding and processing emotion than we give them credit for. Proactively teaching them how to communicate what they're feeling and explaining how emotions work can go a long way toward helping them develop the self-regulation tools they'll use throughout their life.


This article originally appeared on 4.4.23

This is a message we've all needed at least once in our lives.

Dads don’t typically get labeled as the parent you come to with an emotional issue—that’s usually one of the many jobs reserved for mom.

A father’s sensitivity, or lack thereof, is often depicted as going straight for “practical solutions” and preaching the values of stoicism—you know, the manly stuff. . There’s of course nothing inherently wrong with these coping strategies, but in times of despair when all you want is a shoulder to cry on, they can feel a little…less than satisfactory.

But sometimes we get stories of fathers breaking the mold with profound compassion. And when we do, it can help heal the parts of ourselves that maybe didn’t get that from our own dads.

That’s certainly the case for the millions of viewers who were moved when a woman named Fallon Thompson shared the incredible text her dad sent her right after a breakup.

As Thompson explained in her video, her partner dumped her in the driveway of her home, and her father saw the entire thing—prompting him to send a little reassurance.

First, he shared how his own experience with heartbreak helped him find the relationship he truly wanted.

“Hey baby girl…here is some perspective from your old man…I have had lots of relationships…from one night stands, to flights, to friends with benefits, to girlfriends, to live-in girlfriends, and then I met your mom” his message began.

girl dads, fatherhood, emotional intelligence

"What you are dealing with today is necessary in order for you to one day be able to discern when a person is really right for you."

www.tiktok.com

“I can say with certainty that when I met her, it was instantly different. I can also say I knew it was different because I went through those other experiences,” he continued. “So what you are dealing with today is necessary in order for you to one day be able to discern when a person is really right for you.”

He even tried to remind her to be grateful for the experience, without trying to diminish her pain.

“When someone lets you know that you are not for them, deal with…the knowledge that this person gave you back the most valuable thing in the world—your time…Rejoice…that your life is still completely yours and you have not wasted it shackled to someone that did not completely want you.”

Just when you thought it couldn't get any more poetic, the dad then used a brilliant metaphor about cows, bulls and bravery.

Simply put, he said that cows run away from a storm when they see it, and in the process “end up being tortured by the storm longer” since they inadvertently stay in it longer.

Bulls, on the other hand, run towards the storm. The feeling is initially “terrible” but the storm passes by quickly, bringing peace and a renewed sense of strength.

“Be the bull, and lean into your storm,” the dad concluded.” Embrace the suck and let it fill you up. You are strong enough to endure, and very soon you will be at peace. Still on your path, achieving goals, and with all of your time still in surplus. Love, Dad.”

This dad’s heartfelt message not only helped his daughter in a time of need, but millions of viewers as well.

“Tell you dad thank you on my behalf, I need that sm,” one person wrote.

Another echoed, “Your dad just fixed a little part of me. Thanks for sharing.”

One even quipped, “Oh to have an emotionally intelligent dad.”

In an interview with Buzzfeed, Scott (Thompson’s father) shared why it’s vital for dads to be emotionally available to their daughters.

"To the girl dads out there: Just be there. Be invested in their lives; they are so much tougher than us and deal with so much more than we will ever know. That’s why it’s so important to lift them up for both their wins and losses. The world is tough on our girls, and if we can support them during the challenges they face, eventually, they will be able to support themselves and make their own path. Hug your girls tight, never be afraid to be vulnerable with them, and tell them you love them any chance you get," he said.

Indeed, research has shown that fathers play a crucial role in helping their kids to become emotionally resilient adults. Not all fathers will actively take on this role, but even the second hand healing from witnessing it in other father-child relationships is potent. Thank you to dads like Scott who show just how impactful a father's love can be.

The fascinating way a horse reacts when it knows you’re angry.

A new study sheds light on our four-legged friends.

Has a horse ever given you major side-eye?

Think Mariah Carey on season 12 of "American Idol" ...


GIF from "American Idol."

Because if so, it might not have just been in your head.

According to a groundbreaking new study, horses can read our emotions much better than we previously thought.

And their eyes do a lot of their talking.

The new study, out of the University of Sussex in the U.K., analyzed responses from 28 horses when they were shown large photos of people making either angry or happy faces for 30 seconds.

When the horses were shown angry faces, their heart rates increased significantly. They also moved their heads to look at the angry photos through their left eye — a key sign that showed researchers the horses were perceiving a negative stimuli.

Secretary of State John Kerry, a fan of horses. Photo by Justin Sullivan/Getty Images.

So, yeah, you're right — even though that horse gave you that look that one time, it probably wasn't throwing shade Mariah-style. But researchers are confident that this left-eye thing means horses can read human emotion pretty damn well.

To understand this left-eye phenomenon, you've got to understand how the right and left brain works.

At a very 101 level, at least.

Many species (like horses) process what their left eye is seeing in the right hemisphere of their brain. And that's where the brain processes threatening stimuli, researchers noted.

So horses looking at the angry faces with their left eye suggests that they could tell the person in the photo might pose a threat to them.

Former French President Nicolas Sarkozy tries to pet a horse for a pic. Photo by Eric Feferberg/AFP/Getty Images.

“It’s interesting to note that the horses had a strong reaction to the negative expressions, but less so to the positive," researcher Amy Smith, a doctoral student at the university, said in a statement of the findings. "This may be because it is particularly important for animals to recognize threats in their environment. In this context, recognizing angry faces may act as a warning system, allowing horses to anticipate negative human behavior such as rough handling.”

The research isn't just cool — it uncovered a big "first." And it says a lot about how emotionally intelligent horses actually are.

The fact horses can read the facial expressions of another species is a pretty big deal.

"We have known for a long time that horses are a socially sophisticated species," Smith said. "But this is the first time we have seen that they can distinguish between positive and negative human facial expressions."

Queen Elizabeth II: Another world figure who's partial to horses. Photo by Eamonn M. McCormack/Getty Images.

These findings also come on the heels of another study published last summer that discovered horses wear their moods on their faces. You've just got to keep your eyes peeled.

As CNN reported, that study found that horses have 17 various subtle facial expressions that can indicate mood — one more than dogs and four more than chimpanzees.

"It was previously thought that humans possessed the most complex repertoire of facial expressions, and that ... the further away an animal was from humans, the more rudimentary their use of facial expressions would be," researchers wrote. "However ... it is apparent that horses also have an extensive range of facial movements, sharing many ... with humans and other animals."

It seems like the more we understand about these four-legged beauties, the more fascinating they become.

They're downright stunning, super adorable while splashing in water for the first time, and have surprisingly high emotional IQs. What are we going to learn next?


Russian President Vladimir Putin also apparently likes horses. Photo by Alexey Druzhinin/AFP/Getty Images.