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upworthy

Same-sex couples are particularly awesome at communication, according to new research.

There's a lot to learn about same-sex relationships. So why is there almost no research?

One of the most important elements of a healthy relationship is the ability to communicate well.

It's hard to have a happy long-term relationship without figuring out how to talk (and, yes, fight) in productive, healthy ways. In fact, research has shown that communicating effectively and openly is one of the key determinants of a stable, satisfying relationship. Almost half of divorced people say they plan to change how they communicate with their partner in their next relationship.


Photo by Charles McQuillan/Getty Images.

Some research shows that same-sex couples are particularly awesome at talking it out.

That's something that Dr. Megan Robins picked up on when she was doing her dissertation research on couples coping with breast cancer diagnoses. Most of the couples in her study were heterosexual and of mixed genders, but the study also included seven lesbian couples.

"They [the same-sex couples] had this qualitatively more positive feel to them than the opposite-sex couples," Dr. Robbins said in an interview. "It was only my impression, so I wasn't coming to any scientific conclusion, but they did seem to laugh together more, to be a little bit closer and more positive."

There was a problem, though: Robbins couldn't find much other research on same-sex marriages.

"When I looked for background literature on same-sex couples, I came up really short. There was almost nothing there," Dr. Robbins said. "There are certainly notable studies on same-sex couples out there, but we're talking thousands of articles on opposite-sex couples compared to a handful on same-sex couples."

Photo by Darren McCollester/Getty Images.

One of those "notable" studies she's talking about is one of the only other studies out there on same-sex relationships and happiness. It's a survey conducted by the Families and Work Institute and PriceWaterhouseCoopers, which found that gay couples don't really pay attention to gender roles when they're splitting up chores, and they're better at communicating openly.

According to the study, people in same-sex relationships also tend to be better at fighting fair and at resolving conflicts well. They have more positive relationships, on average, likely because they treat each other more like equals and care less about adhering to gender stereotypes.

Researchers drew these important conclusions from a really small body of evidence, so there's a lot more to learn.

That's where Dr. Robbins' new project comes into play. She's launching a study that looks at LGBTQ and straight couples and their day-to-day interactions.

"The focus of this study is how these couples can support — and maybe in some cases hinder — each other's health behaviors, things like smoking, drinking, and exercising. We know a lot about how heterosexual couples do this and what strategies work for them, but we know very little about how this information applies to same-sex couples," she said.

I'm hoping this study is one of many more to come because it's hugely important.

Often doctors and public health professionals aren't trained to address the health issues of the LGBTQ demographic; they may ask the wrong questions, give bad advice, or say really insensitive things.

Photo by Ty Wright/Getty Images.

"LGBTQ people are at-risk [health-wise] in the first place, and we don't know how to target them better, as far as couples go. I'm hoping that this information will help people to tailor interventions geared at improving health behaviors down the line," Dr. Robbins said.

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Making new friends as an adult is challenging. While people crave meaningful IRL connections, it can be hard to know where to find them. But thanks to one Facebook Group, meeting your new best friends is easier than ever.

Founded in 2018, NYC Brunch Squad brings together hundreds of people who come as strangers and leave as friends through its in-person events.

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Members also bond over their passion for giving back to their community. The group has hosted many impact-driven events, including a “Picnic with Purpose” to create self-care packages for homeless shelters and recently participated in the #SquadSpreadsJoy challenge. Each day, the 100 members participating receive random acts of kindness to complete. They can also share their stories on the group page to earn extra points. The member with the most points at the end wins a free seat at the group's Friendsgiving event.

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Image by Tax Foundation.

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When Munger passed, his estimated worth was $2.6 billion. Buffet, 93, is believed to be worth $119 billion.

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If you're grieving a loved one this holiday season, here's a gift you can give yourself

After losing her almost-4-year-old daughter to epilepsy, Kelly Cervantes created a "grief companion" that meets people wherever they are in their grief journey.

Images courtesy of Kelly Cervantes

Kelly Cervantes wrote her way through grieving the loss of her daughter, Adelaide.

Kelly Cervantes begins the Introduction to her book with five words: "Grief sucks. It's also weird." It's a concise truth that anyone who has lost a loved one knows all too well.

Grief is a universal experience—none of us get through life without loss—but it's also unique to each person. Most of us are familiar with the popular "stages of grief" theory, but denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance (along with guilt and a host of things) are less like sequential rungs on a ladder and more like pools you fall into at various times as you stumble your way through the grief process. Grief is not linear and it's not neat and tidy and it's not predictable.

Take it from someone who's been there. Kelly Cervantes lost her daughter, Adelaide, to epilepsy just shy of her 4th birthday. Using writing as a therapeutic tool to help her process Adelaide's medically complex life, death and everything that came after, Kelly created the book she wished she'd had as she was trying to navigate her own grieving process.

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