upworthy
Add Upworthy to your Google News feed.
Google News Button
Joy

People share their partner's weirdest quirks that they've learned to love

Sometimes a healthy relationship means accepting your partner thinks out loud…all the time.

relationships, pet peeves, quirks,
Representative Image from Canva

Ah, that special moment of realizing your beloved is an absolute weirdo.

There comes a time in every long term relationship when the honeymoon phase has ended, and your partner’s little quirks begin to reveal themselves. You know, that habit of hogging the blanket at night, or making an audible “ah” sound after every sip of soda. Those fun little idiosyncrasies that are both endearing and exasperating all at the same time.

And while these pet peeves can be aggravating, they also invite love on a deeper level. When you can truly appreciate someone for their imperfections, without judgment or resentment—and they can do the same for you—the result is more humor, trust, connection and joy. Frustrations dissolve into moments of laughter. And flaws become celebrations of each other’s humanity.

Recently, someone asked the folks on Reddit to share the “weirdest thing” their partners did, that they’ve learned to accept. The answers were adorable, hilarious, strange, and all around a fairly profound glimpse at what human relationships are all about.

Let’s take a look.


"When he's alone, he talks to himself in 3rd person, making comments on the things he's doing. 'Ladies and gentlemen, xxxx has done it again, he's made the best omelet in history.. for the 3rd time this month. He's the man of the year. Look at him getting a glass, and opening the fridge.. oooh is he going for orange juice? yes he is! okay now he needs to do something but what was it? ah righttt the toast. The toast, everybody. He almost forgot the toast.' Stuff like that. I'm glad he does it loudly, it's hilarious. Especially when he gets tired and stops mid-sentence but keeps doing what he's doing in silence. Even funnier when he starts speaking again all of a sudden."

via GIPHY

"She never, ever, ever eats the last bite of anything. She'll always have a bite of whatever left on her plate after a meal. She's never once, in the 20 years I've been with her, eaten the last piece of pizza. She'll never take the last peanut. I've never seen her finish a can of Pringles. Upside for me: I get the last everything."

"When he wakes up in the morning, he puts on ALL his clothes, just to walk to the bathroom, take them off and have shower. Why?? I will never understand that lol"

"My wife is a neat freak, always cleans up after herself and is putting things away. However I noticed that when she runs out of toilet paper she will just take the new roll and stand it on top of the empty tube instead of replacing it. I asked her why she does that and she said “it’s the one thing I allow myself to be lazy about”. I think it’s hilarious. OR My amazing, incredible wife absolutely refuses to reload the TP roll. It is complete out of character for her, but it's such a locked in behavior I have given up on correcting it. At least she isn't putting it on backwards!!"

via GIPHY

"He lays on the floor to decompress, which isn't too bizarre. But he lays down in weird spots and occasionally accidentally scares the shit out of me. One time, he was lying on the floor in the front entrance closet, petting the cat, and fell asleep. I just saw his legs on the ground sticking out from the closet. My first thought was that he had fallen, hurt himself, and was unconscious. But he was just snuggling the cat. Another time, I couldn't find him anywhere in the house and started to freak out. But he was lying on the back deck on his belly, talking to the skunk that lives under the deck. This was at night. So all I see is a man sprawled on the deck in the dark. Scared me silly."

"She sleeps with her eyes open occasionally, and will also sometimes laugh like someone just told her the greatest joke ever told while sleeping. I've accepted my little demon."

"He always finds random objects around the house to make into a 'hat' for me. Fresh laundry? Hat. Random plushies? Hat. Bubble wrap? Hat. Then he makes one for himself, we take a funny picture and hang it on our 'hat photos' wall."

via GIPHY

"She does gatherer things. bringing little trinkets home and presenting them to me. I always say very impressive! she puts little piles of things all over the house and gets upset if they are disturbed or I suggest getting rid of them."

"My husband occasionally talks in his sleep and will also laugh like a little girl in his sleep. It absolutely cracks me up and creeps me out at the same time."

"I don’t know how weird this is, but my boyfriend constantly talks to himself. He also gives voices to our pets- 2 cats and a dog. Each pet has a distinct voice and accent. Some of them have catchphrases."

"Sometimes when he’s getting ready for work in the morning, I’ll hear him having conversations with the pets and himself in all the various voices. It’s hilarious and adorable. Sometimes I catch myself doing it now, too."

"She mostly closes doors, but only mostly. Not fully ajar, not fully closed. I have never seen this wonderful woman completely close a door in 13+ years.Luckily, it’s just inside doors."

"He gets very concerned about his socks to the point he will count them when he's folding laundry and get irritated when he can't find all of them. Then he accused me of doing something with them. Like I would do anything with his stupid socks."

"He needs the GPS even though he knows the area and the way. If the GPS goes out, he’ll oddly panic."

via GIPHY

"Anything that could go or fit on top of anything else is called a "hat." There are no lids, there are no covers, there are no toppers or caps. We have a top-loader freezer. She wouldn't say 'close the lid.' She'd say 'put the freezer hat back on.' Bottle caps? No. Bottle hats. Does the pot of boiling water have a lid? Nope. It has a hat. Wine bottle stopper? Try again. That's a hat. Trash bin cover? Trash bin hat*. There are hats and only hats. Edit to add that she's a native English speaker, but her family is Lithuanian. I think it's something she picked up from her dad as a kid and it just became a habit. She is aware that it's goofy."

"All sauces are gravy. What kind of salad gravy do you want?"

"He does this loud chicken noise (like a baw-kak!) just randomly and it could be anywhere. It’s never been inappropriate, but it’s always surprising and I laugh every freaking time."

"To my wife, everything is a 'counter.' Tables, dressers, nightstands, basically any flat surface that is not the floor is the counter."

"He randomly licks me. We will be cuddling and he just will lick my shoulder real quickly. I don’t get it."

"My youngest had trouble learning to eat solids and my wife spent 3-5 meals a day for like 6 months mimicking eating to her. It’s now 9 years later and after every first bite of a meal she goes MMMMMMMMMM! It’s a charming relic of a stressful time in life."

"He does sock shoe sock shoe like a psycho."

via GIPHY

"She usually dresses normal but sometimes she goes through phases where she dresses like people from different eras. Like a 70s disco phase outfit or a 80s rock chick outfit or a 1950s dress outfit. It's one thing to do this for a day or something... she will do it for like 3-4 weeks straight, ordering clothes on amazon to make new outfits, wearing the outfits to go grocery shopping or walking the dog etc. And then she rinses and repeats every once in a while. She also will obsessively watch movies from that era when this happens. She has been doing this for 20+ years. She is known in our neighborhood for doing this."

"Bf is a biologist and absolutely cannot stop himself from interacting with any animal/insect/bird that his brain has deemed interesting. I've spotted him softly talk to bugs and bees when he thinks no one's looking. Also as long as he has deemed it safe, if we spot a snail (and he's REALLY GOOD at spotting snails it's insane) he WILL pick it up no matter the circumstances. We've spent HOURS in parks/sanctuaries in one single spot if he's spotted a cool lizard or an animal because we must make new animal friends. His parents tell me all the different insects, bugs and tiny animals he used to bring to them as a baby lmfao."

Pets

Dogs really do have favorite people, and here's how they decide who it will be

Sometimes their favorite people don't live in their house.

Dogs really do have favorite people. Here's how they decide

When my sister's dog, Junior, was on this side of the Rainbow Bridge, I was one of his favorite people. This dog would get full body wags every time I came around, and we'd spend most of the day cuddled up with each other. Now my dog, Cocolina, behaves in the same way whenever my sister comes to visit. But what goes into a dog deciding who their favorite person is? Spoiler, it's not always the person they live with.

Like humans, animals have their own personalities. You might rescue a dog thinking it will be the perfect companion, only to have the furry adoptee spend every waking moment following your partner around. You could spend hundreds of dollars on vet checkups, new harnesses, treats, and all the squeaky dog toys you can find, but that still won't be enough to convince a dog to love you. Instead of showering the giver of treats with kisses, they make goo-goo eyes at the pet sitter. It turns out they have their reasons.

dogs; dogs favorite; dog's best friend; pets; people and pets; rescue animals Corgi cuddles spreading joy and smiles!Photo credit: Canva

Since our canine friends can't talk, we have to rely on the experts to explain what the deal is with how dogs pick their favorite human. Carol Erickson, a Pennsylvania SPCA animal advocate, gave a brief interview with CBS News Philadelphia to explain her take on how dogs determine their bestest, most favorite person.

"What it comes down to for all dogs is they decide their very favorite family member by who gives the most consistent, high-quality attention, play, and physical affection: ear rubs, scratches, that sort of thing. Dogs get positive associations from being around people who consistently provide positive experiences, including treats, meals, play that they enjoy, and remember also that early association in those first six months can influence who a dog may like better later on," she tells the outlet.

Rover backs up Erickson's claim that the first six months are crucial in determining who will become the dog's favorite person later in life. The website says, "Many dogs bond hardest to whoever cares for them during their key socialization period, which occurs between birth and six months." However, they later note that dogs can still be socialized appropriately even as adults.

The dog-sitting website also explains that it's not uncommon for people who are not the dog's primary caregiver to be their favorite person. Pointing out that physical affection is vital to dogs, if the mailman gives out head scratches daily but the owner doesn't, the mailman may become the dog's favorite person. While physical affection and treats go a long way for some pooches, those aren't the only things that get puppy eyes melting with love.

dogs; dogs favorite; dog's best friend; pets; people and pets; rescue animals Joyful moments with furry friends! 🐶❤️Photo credit: Canva

"While positive experiences play a big role, a dog’s favorite person isn’t always just the one holding the treat bag. Dogs also respond to emotional connection, tone of voice, and even body language. Their preferences are shaped by a mix of familiarity, trust, and how well a person understands their needs," explains Elle Vet Sciences. They later add, "Dogs also take emotional cues from us. If a person is stressed, loud, or inconsistent, a dog may be less likely to form a deep bond with them. On the other hand, someone who offers reassurance and stability often earns the title of 'favorite' without even realizing it."

In short, if you want to be your dog's bestie, being consistent with affection, actions, and even training and grooming will get you there a lot faster than treats alone. Dogs aren't trying to be persnickety; just like humans, they enjoy being around people who show them that they enjoy their company—and maybe some treats.

Images via Canva/martin-dm, Daniel Torobekov

Dolphin parenting is a firm yet flexible parenting style.

People are choosing a number of different parenting styles to raise their kids today. From gentle parenting to FAFO parenting, there are seemingly endless options to choose from.

One parenting style that is geared to instill creativity and independence in kids is called "dolphin parenting." Coined by Harvard-trained psychiatrist Dr. Shimi Kang, the term describes parents who have a more authoritative parenting style.

"Like the body of the dolphin, these parents are firm yet flexible," she writes in Psychology Today. "Dolphin parents have rules and expectations but also value creativity and independence. They are collaborative and use guiding and role modeling to raise their kids."

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Dolphin parents are "adaptable, community-minded and valuing play, a sense of social connection, and the daily tasks of downtime, routine, regular sleep, exercise," says Kang, the author of The Dolphin Parent: A Guide to Raising Healthy, Happy, and Self-Motivated Kids.

She adds that this parenting style benefits kids long into their young adulthood. "When we parent that way, when we bring in that collaborative guiding, firm and flexible dolphin approach, we see young people with better physical/mental health, better self-motivation, better sense of creativity, innovation and problem solving," she says.

As a mother of three, Kang shares that she was raised by a "Dolphin Mom" and became one herself. "She had rules and expectations, including expecting us to do well in academics and be disciplined. But she also valued our autonomy, individual passions and independent choices," she explains in TIME.

According to Kang, there are six pillars of Dolphin Moms:

- Are balanced and collaborative
- Do not overschedule
- Do not over instruct
- Do not over protect
- Create a pod of support
- Adapt

There are two other styles of parenting that Kang has identified: tiger parenting (authoritarian parenting) and jellyfish parenting (permissive parenting). Dolphin parenting falls between these two.

Dolphin parenting's authoritative focus does not shut kids down, though. "With authoritative parenting, the doors of communications are open on either side, giving kids the space to make mistakes and express themselves in a respectful manner," Kang writes in Psychology Today.

dolphin, dolphin parent, dolphin parenting, parenting, parenting style A mother helps her daughter with the computer. Credit: August de Richelieu/Pexels

Kang cites research from the Harvard-based Grant Study of Adult Development to support dolphin parenting.

"It showed that the ability to adapt creatively and 'make lemonade out of lemons' was a key determinant of success," she explains in a post on her website. "In addition, individuals who displayed altruism and a sense of humor during conflict and stress were more likely to be in the top quarter of the 'happy-well' group, and those who scored highest on measurements of 'warm relationships' in childhood earned an average of $141,000 a year more at their peak salaries (usually between ages 55 and 60) than those who scored lowest."

Kang also notes that "other important predictors of being 'happy-well' were important lifestyle factors such as not smoking, little use of alcohol, regular exercise, and maintenance of normal weight."

Simply put, dolphin parenting is another parenting style that just might be the best for raising kids to be healthy, happy, and independent.

Credit: Canva

A couple talking over coffee.

Many people find making small talk to be an excruciating experience. They think it’s boring to talk with a stranger about the weather, sports, or weekend plans. They may also feel like they don’t have anything to contribute to the conversation, or they don’t understand the point of having one in the first place.

However, those who excel at making small talk have a tremendous advantage in their professional and romantic relationships, as well as forming new friendships. Most importantly, small talk is a window to transition into medium talk or, eventually, deep, meaningful conversations. The problem is that many people get stuck in small talk, and things stall before progressing to something beneficial.

conversation, friends, small talk, chatting Two women chatting in front of a fire. Credit: Atlantic Ambience/Pexels

How to get better at small talk

The great thing is that, like anything, making small talk is a skill that we can all improve by learning some simple conversation techniques. One technique that is great for keeping a conversation going, like hitting a ball back and forth past a net in tennis, is a simple statement:

"It reminds me of…”

A Redditor recently shared some great examples of how the phrase can be used to turn a mundane topic, such as the weather, into something much more fun:

Them: "It's been really rainy, huh?"

You:

Option 1 (Personal Story): "Yeah, it reminds me of a time I went on a run in the rain and nearly got hit by a car."

Option 2 (Music / Pop Culture): "It reminds me of every Adele song. When I'm driving, I feel like I'm in a music video."

Option 3 (Family): "It reminds me of my dad, he used to love playing with us in the rain as kids."

Option 4 (Thing you watched / World News): "It reminds me of this documentary I saw where they're trying to make it rain in the Sahara Desert.”

Option 5 (Place you lived): “It reminds me of when I lived in Australia, it barely ever rained there. I actually love this weather.”


- YouTube www.youtube.com

You see in this example that using “It reminds me of…” opened up the conversation to five potential new and more exciting topics. The “You” in the story could have responded with, “Yeah, it sure is rainy,” and the conversation would have ended right there. But instead, branching off the topic of rain into something a bit deeper took the conversation to the next level. You get extra points if you can take the “reminds me of” into a topic that you assume the other person will be interested in.

What’s a polite way to change the topic in a conversation?

Using “this reminds me of…” is also a polite way to move the topics in another direction, especially when it's a topic that you don’t want to discuss or one that makes you feel a bit uncomfortable. Or, if it’s a situation where the other person is monologuing on one topic for a very long time, this makes it easy to transition away from their diatribe.

conversation, small talk, chatting, cafe Two guys chat at a cafe. Credit: Helena Lopes/Pexels

Ultimately, the phrase is an excellent way for you to save the person you’re talking to from being stuck in the small talk rut as well. It shows you understand that when someone brings up the weather, they are merely getting things started with something both of you have in common. They probably don’t want to talk about the weather for 30 minutes, unless they are a meteorologist. “It reminds me of…” is an invitation to go a bit deeper and shows the other person that you’d like to learn more about them.

This article originally appeared in April. It has been updated.


Pets

Veterinarian shares 7 signs a cat loves you, even if it seems like they couldn't care less

What looks like aloof behavior in cats is often a sign of love.

Cats don't always show their affection in the way we expect.

One of the reasons so many people love dogs is that they usually make their bond with their favorite humans quite clear. Dogs wear their loyalty and affinity on their sleeve, whereas cats are a bit more...aloof.

Sure, some cats are affectionate little cuddle bugs, but many cats seem as if they couldn't care less about anyone, and even the snuggly ones can't be coaxed into affection if they're not into it at the moment. That doesn't mean they aren't feeling or expressing love, though. Some of the behaviors that make cats appear bored or disinterested are actually signs that they like you.

Dr. Sarah Wooten, a small animal veterinarian, shared a list of 7 signs that a cat loves you with Cats.com, and it might make cat owners feel better about their feline friendships.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

1. Slow Blinking

When a cat sits across from you and stares at you with sleepy-looking eyes, blinking slowly, it might seem like they're bored or tired. But those slow blinks are actually how they communicate peace and connection. "If you're seeing that with your cat, they love you," says Dr. Wooten.

2. Lap Sitting

One of our cats loves to sit in our laps, but only with her head facing away from us, which feels a bit impersonal. We'll take it, though, since sitting in our laps is apparently a sign of love.

"Not all cats love a large amount of body contact, petting, and things like that with humans," says Dr. Wooten. "Remember every cat is individual…but if your cat is a touchy-feely cat and loves to be touched by humans, then sitting in your lap for an extended period of time is definitely a sign that your cat loves and trusts you."

cats, pets, signs a cat loves you, kitties, animal behavior Cat sitting in a woman's lapPhoto credit: Canva

3. Present Dropping

If you've never had a cat bring you a dead mouse or the head of a bird or some other disgusting offering, consider yourself lucky. However, if you have, you should also consider yourself lucky, as it means your cat loves you. "Even though to us humans it seems pretty unsavory, to your cat it is a sign of love and dedication," says Wooten. Of course, it's not always dead animals—sometimes cats might bring you inanimate objects they've collected (which makes you doubly lucky).

4. Kneading Biscuits

The rhythmic kneading cats do on blankets, pillows, or their humans is a behavior that mimics what they did while nursing as kittens. "It's just a leftover instinctual thing that they do when they feel super happy and super connected," says Wooten. "So if your cat makes biscuits when they're near you, that is a sign of love and connection."

cats, pets, signs a cat loves you, kitties, animal behavior Cat making biscuitsPhoto credit: Canva

5. Purring

This one might seem like a no-brainer, but purring doesn't always mean affection. Cats purr for many reasons, including happiness or contentment, but also for pain or sickness.

"But if your cat's just hanging out at home and they're near you, and suddenly you hear the motor go on, that's a pretty good sign that they love you," says Wooten.

6. Rubbing or "Bunting"

If a cat comes up and rubs its face or body on you, that's a sign of love and connection. It's called bunting, and essentially, it's how the cat marks you as "theirs."

"Cats have scent markers in their paws, they have them on their face…and they also have them on the base of their tail," says Wooten. "So what cats will often do is they will rub their paws or their face or their tail on the people that they love and consider to be their property."

cats, pets, signs a cat loves you, kitties, animal behavior Who knew yawning and stretching could be a sign of love?Photo credit: Canva

7. Yawning and Stretching

Much like slow blinking, yawning, and stretching may easily be mistaken for sleepiness, but there's often more to it than that. It's a sign that they are comfy around you. "Especially if they're sleeping, if they see you [and] suddenly they get up, maybe they meow at you and then they yawn and they stretch, they get everything all good and feeling good, and then they come hang out with you, it's a sign of love," says Wooten. "That's a sign that they're very comfortable and that they're very happy to see you."

Cats may appear to be standoffish or only affectionate when they feel like it, but it could be that they are showing you they love you in ways that you might not recognize. Cats can be a lot harder to read than dogs, but they really do love us—just not always in the ways we expect.

Photo Credit: Canva

A person rushes through the airport. A man looks at a clock.

English writer and theologian William Penn once famously said, "Time is what we want most, but what we use worst." Most likely, he meant that most of us squander the time given to us, as though it’s an endless resource. But, for the sake of this topic, let's also apply it to those of us who simply can't manage time properly.

We all have those friends who are shockingly, chronically late to everything—and those who are always early. (I'm the latter, and it seems to be equally annoying to the people in my life.) The question is why are we this way and how can we learn to co-exist? There are many reasons that contribute to how we manage time, and they of course depend on a variety of individualized factors, but one theory floating around is actually how full or empty we see the proverbial cup.

From an article posted on University of Southern California's School of Psychology site, it all comes down to our bias toward optimism or pessimism. For the late arrivers, it's called the planning fallacy. "Psychologist Daniel Kahneman and colleague Amos Tversky introduced the concept in 1979, defining it as 'the tendency to underestimate the amount of time needed to complete a future task, due in part to the reliance on overly optimistic performance scenarios.'"

In other words, they might feel it will all "flow" as it's supposed to, so there's no need to plan ahead. "Psychologists call this mindset 'optimism bias.' While being optimistic has its benefits, such as an improved state of well-being, getting caught in the constant cycle of optimism bias can cause issues at work that impact productivity."

In a piece for The Decision Lab, author Kira Warje,further explains, "Whether it's building a house, launching a product, or studying for an exam, people tend to create overly optimistic timelines and budgets. This happens because we focus too much on the best-case scenario and ignore relevant historical data or potential setbacks."

She also explains the notion that an outsider would estimate time differently, writing, "Interestingly, the planning fallacy only affects estimations about one’s own task completion times. Outside observers tend to lean in the opposite direction, overestimating the time needed to complete a task."

As for the early-arrivers, we perhaps overestimate the amount of time something will take. Often this is driven by anxiety in general, but to couch it in similar terms, this would be a pessimism bias.

In her article for VegOut Magazine, culinary writer and chef Maya Flores she shares eight traits that people who often arrive early share. One is "They have a physical discomfort with rushing." This, at least for me, is so true. And although early-arrivers often tend to pessimistically assess a situation, we are actively trying to avoid feeling the discomfort that comes with rushing.

rushing, planning, being late, anxiety, travel A person drives frantically. Giphy GIF by HRejterzy

Another trait Flores shares is, "They have a complex relationship with control." This doesn't imply they're "control freaks." Flores writes, "They've identified what's actually within their power (when they leave, how they prepare) and released the rest. That need for control over their own state—their calmness, their preparation, their transition time—remains non-negotiable."

And if one digs even further, there may be deep-seated reasons for it. "Many early arrivers have a story: the time they were devastatingly late for something important, a chaotic childhood where nothing started on time, or a formative experience of keeping someone important waiting. They're not necessarily traumatized, but they've decided: never again."

In the Reddit post "Is anybody else chronically, pathologically EARLY?" there are well over 400 comments, many of whom back up the theory that this began in our formative years. One commenter writes, "My mom was 10 minutes late for everything my entire life, and I’ve been mortified by it for as long as I can remember. It wasn’t a crazy amount of time, but it was for things you just can’t be late to, weddings, doctor’s appointment, jury duty, that kinda thing. I’m always early because of her haha."

clock, time management, being late, being early, planning fallacy A clock does its thing. Giphy GIF by MOODMAN

Another shares, "Same here. I spent so much time experiencing consequences for other people’s lateness or waiting endlessly to be picked up as if the person responsible didn’t know what time things ended, so I have just chosen the opposite. I’m rarely dramatically early, but I can’t be late to things that have a firm start time."

Then there are those who have mastered the art of being "exactly on time." In an article for The Expert Editor, author Lachlan Brown, discusses these folks, who retain traits from both groups. "They possess a heightened sense of responsibility" and "they value structure and routine." If one has these characteristics, without the anxiety that often comes with them (at least for us early birds), they can land somewhere in the coveted middle.