Comedian Laura Clery gets candid about setting boundaries while co-parenting with an addict
Here's what she absolutely won't put up with.

Comedian Laura Clery gets candid about coparenting with an addict
Editor's Note: This story discusses addiction and its impact on families. If you or someone you know is struggling with addiction, the SAMHSA’s National Helpline is a free, confidential, 24/7, 365-day-a-year treatment referral and information service (in English and Spanish) for individuals and families facing mental and/or substance use disorders. Call 1-800-662-HELP(4357) for assistance.
Coparenting after a breakup or divorce can be hard, especially if the relationship didn't end on good terms. But sometimes, it's not just the relationship ending that causes coparenting to be difficult. Sometimes it's something that directly impacts the wellbeing of the children you have together: substance abuse. Major cultural differences and parenting styles can be hard to overcome, but substance use can affect the mental and physical safety of the children you both love.
Comedian and actor Laura Clery has been open about her own previous struggle with addiction, and has remained sober for more than a decade. The YouTuber got married, welcomed two children, and has since gotten divorced since then, maintaining her sobriety the entire time. But her ex-husband, Stephen Hilton, has had very public relapses since their divorce and, in a recent joint podcast, they shared that one of his relapses contributed to the breakdown of their marriage, leaving Clery on the rollercoaster of coparenting with someone in active addiction.
At the filming of the joint podcast, Hilton, a film score composer, revealed he's been sober. Unfortunately, it was shortly after the filming that he relapsed again. Since clearing the air about their struggles with Hilton's addiction to narcotics, (including fentanyl), Clery has been very vulnerable with sharing what it has been like to coparent with someone in active addiction. Their young children, Alfie, seven, and Poppy, four, are accustomed to seeing their father regularly, and Clery has aimed to continue this normalcy as much as possible even through Hilton's active addiction stages.
In a recent video, she explains how she found out he was in active addiction again and the boundaries she enforced when the producer relapsed.
When speaking about their coparenting relationship, she says, "It's feeling good. It's feeling functional...and I just feel like wow, everything is good. You know, even in his life, he's gotten some music opportunities that are really exciting, and I feel like I'm getting some opportunities with my podcast and making progress on my book. It's just, life is feeling good and then I open up Instagram three days ago to a video of him talking about he's in active addiction, and he's using and he's documenting the whole thing" she adds. "And my heart is broken. And I feel so stupid, and I feel so angry because you were just picking up my kids from...our kids from school."
The best-selling author continues to express disbelief as she recounts all the time he's had parenting the children alone while simultaneously documenting his relapse on the Internet. Clery explicitly states that she still loves Hilton and her goal isn't to bash him, explaining that she views addiction "as a cunning, baffling, powerful and progressive disease. So I don't think he's evil or bad. I think he's sick right now."
Clery explains later, "I guess it just makes it a little trickier when you've got kids in the mix and it's really f***ing sad to me because again, he's such a good dad, especially when he's clean. He's so loving, he adores them and we have so much fun together and yeah, my heart just breaks for the kids." She starts tearing up thinking about boundaries she has to put in place to keep them safe. "Yeah, like over the weekend he was supposed to have them on Saturday. It's like no, you're not seeing the kids. You're on drugs, you're not seeing the kids and they ask for 'daddy, daddy, daddy' and it's like 'no we're not doing daddy's house this weekend, you know, he's busy.'"
In another video uploaded to YouTube, Clery explains that, since his relapse, she holds a firm boundary that he cannot be alone with the kids. She has to be present to ensure safety, which she admits is hard as she says it feels like solo parenting all the time while he's actively using. Thankfully, Hilton has restarted his sobriety journey though it's unclear if he's sticking to it—which was a topic of their most recent joint podcast together.
In the joint podcast, Hilton admits to planning to do "controlled using" where he has periods of sobriety and periods of active use saying, "I've got a feeling that I'm not going to get away with this for very much longer. I feel like I'm walking a tight rope, like my original plan was to stop for 30 days and start again. Cause my point was that I'm blowing my life up anyway. I live on my own, there's nothing to lose. My kids don't live with me, I don't have anything to lose."
Hilton admits to struggling with depression which leads to him feeling the desire to use drugs. While Clery continues to reinforce the boundary around visitation with the children, she remains supportive throughout the episode. At one point she offers up a program that brought him joy in the past: when he was telling his story to people in hospitals and prisons who were struggling with addiction. It's clear that the composer wants to do the right thing and Clery wants him to be better for himself and their children, but boundaries are still required until longevity in sobriety is achieved again.
- Watch this powerful animated video show the tragic reality of addiction ›
- Woman shares startling before-and-after photo to give recovering addicts hope ›
- Eminem just reached an awesome addiction recovery milestone—12 years of sobriety ›
- Swim coach's reaction when toddler tries to kiss him is a masterclass in teaching boundaries - Upworthy ›




American portion sizes are colossal.
Tax shouldn't be a not-so-fun surprise at the end of your shopping trip.
A trip to the doctor shouldn't break the bank.
This totally isn't weird at all. Right?
It's a choice.
America loves extra sugar in savory foods.
Princess Odette Girl GIF by The Swan Princess
Rose GIF
sailor moon GIF
river phoenix 80s GIF 
All of this will be ours one day. Yay.
Elderly woman with white hair on phone, sharing a story about a dead person her child has never met.
Surprised elderly man in blue shirt against a yellow background.
Elderly woman in pink shirt using a smartphone on a garden swing.
TV for waking. TV for sleep.
Elderly man using a magnifying glass to read a piece of mail
Mom is totally humiliated after her kindergartner tells the teacher what she does for work
She was clearly mortified.
A mom is embarrassed by her child.
One of the great joys and stresses of parenting is that you never know what will come out of your child’s mouth. When you have young, inquisitive kids, they can say really inappropriate things to people without realizing they were being rude or possibly offensive. TikTok influencer Aurora McCausland (@auroramccausland), known for her DIY cleaning tips, recently told a funny story on the platform about how her son believes she makes a living. The problem was that she heard about it from her child's teacher.
Mom is embarrassed by her child
“The other day, I went and picked my five year old up from school and when I get to his classroom his teacher pulls me inside and says, ‘Hey, today he wanted to tell us about what Mommy does for work and said that Mommy makes videos in her bedroom but only when I'm [he’s] not at home,” McCausland recalled.
Given her body language while telling the story, McCausland was clearly mortified after hearing what her child said to his teacher. It makes it look like she may be posting videos to adult sites while her child is at school, which most people wouldn’t want their son’s teacher to know about.
The good news is that another teacher was there to clarify the young boy's comments by adding, “I think she makes TikTok videos.” The uncomfortable situation was a great invitation to chat with her son about what she does for a living. “So I have to have a conversation with my son about how he tells people what I do for work,” she finished her video.
The funny video went viral, earning over 1.7 million views on TikTok, and inspired many people to share the times when their children had funny ways of explaining their careers. The commenters were a great reminder to parents everywhere that if your child says something embarrassing, it's ok, just about everyone has been through it.
Moms share their most embarrassing moments
A lot of parents spoke up in the comments to show McCausland that she's not the only one to feel embarrassed in front of her child's teacher.
"My son told everyone that we were homeless (because we don’t own our home, we rent)," KBR wrote.
"I work in ortho.. my daughter told her teacher I steal people's knees bc she heard me talking to my husband about a knee replacement," Aingeal wrote.
"My son told a teacher we were living in our car over the summer. Camping. We went camping," Kera wrote.
"In kinder, my son thought Red Bull was alcohol and told his teacher I liked to have beer on the way to school," Ashley wrote.
My niece told her teacher her mom and dad work at the wh*re house. They work at the courthouse," Ellis wrote.
"My husband works as a table games dealer at a casino. Kindergartener, 'Daddy's a Dealer!' We now start every school year clearly stating he works at the casino," CMAC
"My son said we lived in a crack house…There’s a tiny chip in the wall from the doorknob," KNWerner wrote.
"My dad is a hospice chaplain and officiates a lot of funerals. My son and nephew were asked by their preschool teacher if their papa was retired or had a job. They told her his job was to kill people," Tiffyd wrote.
"My son said "my dad left me and I'm all alone" to a random person at the zoo. My husband was just at work," Shelby.
"I am now in my 70s. In my gradeschool, during the McCarthy era, I told my teacher my dad was a communist. He was an economist," Crackerbelly wrote.
"In Kindergarten, my daughter told her teacher that mommy drinks and drives all the time. Coffee. From Starbucks," Jessica wrote.
"Well I once told my kindergarden teacher a man climbs over our fence to visit my mom when her husband is not home... It was a handy man who came to fix gates when they were stuck," Annie wrote.
Ultimately, McCausland’s story is a fun reminder of how children see things through their own unique lens and, with total innocence, can say some of the funniest things. It’s also a great warning to parents everywhere: if you aren’t clear with your kids about what you do for a living, you may be setting yourself up for a very embarrassing misunderstanding. So, even if you think they know what you do ask them as see what they say, you could save yourself from a lot of embarrassment.
This article originally appeared last year and has been updated.