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Kate Winslet says women become more 'powerful' and 'sexy' in their 40s. She's spot on.

'Let's go girls, let's just be in our power. Why not? Life's too flipping short.'

Kate Winslet, aging

Kate Winslet describes the power of women in their 40s.

A weird thing happens to many women in their 40s, something I had heard rumblings of before I arrived at them but didn't fully understand until I was in them. Somehow, somewhat suddenly, you just get better.

I mean, there are definitely some complaints about aching bones and perimenopause to be lodged at this age, but there's an internal shift that happens where you sort of come into your own self. You know who you are and you feel comfortable in your skin.

Kate Winslet described it perfectly in a recent interview with BBC Radio 4's 'Woman's Hour.'


“I'm 47, there are bits that don't do what you want them to do anymore. There's something kind of fab about going: ‘Oh well, that's just the way it is, isn't it?’"

Yes. It is totally fab. My body has changed in ways that feel far too "old" for the age I feel inside, and there are some days when I look at my suddenly crepey arm skin and go "Whoa!" But generally, there's a kind of acquiescence to change that goes along with this age. Even if we take good care of ourselves and even if we use all the creams and serums in the world, our bodies are still going to change in ways we can't control. Fighting change is fruitless.

Winslet continued:

“But I think women come into their 40s, certainly mid-40s, thinking: ‘Oh well, this is the beginning of the decline and things start to change and fade and slide in directions that I don't want them to go in anymore.’ And I've just decided no.

“We become more woman, more powerful, more sexy. We grow into ourselves more, we have the opportunity to speak and speak our mind and not be afraid of what people think of us, not care what we look like quite so much. I think it's amazing. Let's go girls, let's just be in our power. Why not? Life's too flipping short.”

So much yes to all of that. I remember being younger and sort of fearing my 40s, feeling like it all must be downhill from there. But it's not. Not even close.

I'm exactly the same age as Winslet, and I've felt that power she describes.

One thing that happens is you start to simply and calmly not care what people think. It's not the purposeful, semi-rebellious version of not-caring-what-people-think that some are able to achieve when they're younger; it's a genuinely effortless confidence that just sort of arrives one day unannounced. There's a freedom in the effortlessness of it that is impossible to know until you experience it, but it's utterly delicious.

"Life's too flipping short" sort of sums it up. It's a saying we pay lip service to when we're younger, or which we use to justify all manner of YOLO risk-taking, but at this age it's more about not wasting our precious time or energy or life force on things that really don't matter.

This is not to say that women in our 40s have figured out the keys to everything or never experience self-doubt. Definitely not. But this decade is definitively powerful. It feels nothing like it looked like it would feel from the outside. I've never felt more comfortable in my own skin. I've never felt less pulled by trends. I've never felt better in my body (and yes, never sexier). I've had friends who are a little older than I am tell me about this phenomenon, and now that I've experienced it myself, I want to share it with women who might be fearing their 40s.

Never fear—the 40s are fabulous. Kate Winslet is right. We do become more ourselves, and it is amazing. And from what I've heard from women in their 50s, it keeps getting better, at least for a good while longer.

"Let's just be in our power," she says. Yes, let's. It's the absolute best place to be.

Identity

Celebrate International Women's Day with these stunning photos of female leaders changing the world

The portraits, taken by acclaimed photographer Nigel Barker, are part of CARE's "She Leads the World" campaign.

Images provided by CARE

Kadiatu (left), Zainab (right)

True

Women are breaking down barriers every day. They are transforming the world into a more equitable place with every scientific discovery, athletic feat, social justice reform, artistic endeavor, leadership role, and community outreach project.

And while these breakthroughs are happening all the time, International Women’s Day (Mar 8) is when we can all take time to acknowledge the collective progress, and celebrate how “She Leads the World.

This year, CARE, a leading global humanitarian organization dedicated to empowering women and girls, is celebrating International Women’s Day through the power of portraiture. CARE partnered with high-profile photographer Nigel Barker, best known for his work on “America’s Next Top Model,” to capture breathtaking images of seven remarkable women who have prevailed over countless obstacles to become leaders within their communities.

“Mabinty, Isatu, Adama, and Kadiatu represent so many women around the world overcoming incredible obstacles to lead their communities,” said Michelle Nunn, President and CEO of CARE USA.

Barker’s bold portraits, as part of CARE’s “She Leads The World” campaign, not only elevate each woman’s story, but also shine a spotlight on how CARE programs helped them get to where they are today.

About the women:

Mabinty

international womens day, care.org

Mabinty is a businesswoman and a member of a CARE savings circle along with a group of other women. She buys and sells groundnuts, rice, and fuel. She and her husband have created such a successful enterprise that Mabinty volunteers her time as a teacher in the local school. She was the first woman to teach there, prompting a second woman to do so. Her fellow teachers and students look up to Mabinty as the leader and educator she is.

Kadiatu

international womens day, care.org

Kadiatu supports herself through a small business selling food. She also volunteers at a health clinic in the neighboring village where she is a nursing student. She tests for malaria, works with infants, and joins her fellow staff in dancing and singing with the women who visit the clinic. She aspires to become a full-time nurse so she can treat and cure people. Today, she leads by example and with ambition.

Isatu

international womens day, care.org

When Isatu was three months pregnant, her husband left her, seeking his fortune in the gold mines. Now Isatu makes her own way, buying and selling food to support her four children. It is a struggle, but Isatu is determined to be a part of her community and a provider for her kids. A single mother of four is nothing if not a leader.

Zainab

international womens day, care.org

Zainab is the Nurse in Charge at the Maternal Child Health Outpost in her community. She is the only nurse in the surrounding area, and so she is responsible for the pre-natal health of the community’s mothers-to-be and for the safe delivery of their babies. In a country with one of the world’s worst maternal death rates, Zainab has not lost a single mother. The community rallies around Zainab and the work she does. She describes the women who visit the clinic as sisters. That feeling is clearly mutual.

Adama

international womens day, care.org

Adama is something few women are - a kehkeh driver. A kehkeh is a three-wheeled motorcycle taxi, known elsewhere as a tuktuk. Working in the Kissy neighborhood of Freetown, Adama is the primary breadwinner for her family, including her son. She keeps her riders safe in other ways, too, by selling condoms. With HIV threatening to increase its spread, this is a vital service to the community.

Ya Yaebo

international womens day, care.org

“Ya” is a term of respect for older, accomplished women. Ya Yaebo has earned that title as head of her local farmers group. But there is much more than that. She started as a Village Savings and Loan Association member and began putting money into her business. There is the groundnut farm, her team buys and sells rice, and own their own oil processing machine. They even supply seeds to the Ministry of Agriculture. She has used her success to the benefit of people in need in her community and is a vocal advocate for educating girls, not having gone beyond grade seven herself.

On Monday, March 4, CARE will host an exhibition of photography in New York City featuring these portraits, kicking off the multi-day “She Leads the World Campaign.

Learn more, view the portraits, and join CARE’s International Women's Day "She Leads the World" celebration at CARE.org/sheleads.


Community

Inspiring update on man who was recognized by sentencing judge as a childhood friend


He broke down in tears when he recognized her and promised to not let her down.

Inspiring update on man who was recognized by judge in court


There isn't a single person past the age of infancy who has never made a mistake, and the majority of people do something that they're not proud of at least once in their lives. While some mistakes are bigger than others, they're all moments we'd rather keep to ourselves most of the time. For some people those mistakes are poor decisions or lapses in judgment that land them behind bars.

One man found himself facing a judge for sentencing after making poor choices. Arthur Booth had the entire internet weeping after a video of him went viral when the sentencing judge in court recognized him as one of her childhood friends. When Booth recognized the judge, he began to openly sob with embarrassment. He was ultimately sentenced to 10 months in prison and ordered to a drug rehabilitation center.

People wondered what happened after that fateful day in court, and a couple of years later a short update came, showing him reuniting with the judge after finishing his sentence and rehab. But that was years ago, where is he now?

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Health

Over or under? Surprisingly, there actually is a 'correct' way to hang a toilet paper roll.

Let's settle this silly-but-surprisingly-heated debate once and for all.

Elya/Wikimedia Commons

Should you hang the toilet paper roll over or under?

Humans have debated things large and small over the millennia, from the democracy to breastfeeding in public to how often people ought to wash their sheets.

But perhaps the most silly-yet-surprisingly-heated household debate is the one in which we argue over which way to hang the toilet paper roll.

The "over or under" question has plagued marriages and casual acquaintances alike for over 100 years, with both sides convinced they have the soundest reasoning for putting their toilet paper loose end out or loose end under. Some people feel so strongly about right vs. wrong TP hanging that they will even flip the roll over when they go to the bathroom in the homes of strangers.

Contrary to popular belief, it's not merely an inconsequential preference. There is actually a "correct" way to hang toilet paper, according to health experts as well as the man who invented the toilet paper roll in the first place.

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via Casey Kelley (used with permission) and Vince Fleming/Unsplash

Casey Kelley shares her thoughts on kids in travel sports.

Parents whose children participate in elite travel ball leagues can spend up to $12,000 annually on fees, equipment, hotel rooms and gas. One mother, Casey Kelley, from Alabama, has spoken out, saying that if parents spend all of that money and time, their children should get to play in games. Kelley's daughter plays on a club volleyball team.

The topic was inspired by a conversation she had with other volleyball parents who agreed that every kid should get a decent amount of playing time.

“I’ll tell you what I think. I think, if you’re paying to be there, so it's not like high school sports, I think everyone should have the opportunity to play because this is a developmental league ... and they’re there to develop and to learn,” she explained in a TikTok video.

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Bill Moczulewski and Christy Conrad

Bill Moczulewski is a 57-year-old hardworking janitor at Walmart in Cabot, Arkansas. He works the night shifts from Tuesday through Friday, 10 pm to 7 am. Bill lives 5 miles from his job, and he has to walk there and back every day, no matter the weather conditions.

The entire walk, round trip, takes about 2 hours a day.

According to GoFundMe, Bill used to ride his bike to work but was struck by a car one day, but he wouldn’t let that stop him from returning to his job. He’s such a hard worker that he still made it to work using a walker. A few years later, Bill was struck by a car again.

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Does anybody really love to get their period?

Periods have been giving people a run for their money since the beginning of time. It's a pretty safe bet that nobody likes them. If there was a way to replace them with a text message, email or post card that simply read, "not pregnant this month," people would happily sign up for that instead. There are so many better ways to deliver the message than debilitating cramps, irritability, headaches and the need for menstrual products.

Emily Vondy took to social media to show her attempt to psyche herself up for her period, and it's got people laughing. The woman appears to be standing in a mirror filming herself do a pep talk to prepare herself for her upcoming menstrual cycle. But it was honestly probably doing the opposite, though the song is clearly a bop.

"The average woman has about 450 periods in her lifetime, which adds up to ten years. Ten years of our lives will be spent menstruating and I don't want all those years to suck, so this is my attempt to gaslight myself into thinking my period is super cool," Vondy says to open the video.

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Representative Image from Canva

We really are just making up words as we go along, aren't we?

Look, maybe it’s just because I’m no longer in the young crowd, but does it seem like we get new, confusing slang at an exponentially faster rate than before? Just when we finally decipher words likerizz and no cap, now there’s mewing and gyat to contend with. And this is coming from someone without children. I can only imagine how out-of-the-loop parents and teachers must feel.

That is, unless you’re Sam Salem, an eighth-grade substitute teacher who decided to take linguistic matters into his own hands by creating his own “Gen Z slang.”

Salem, who travels around the country doing comedy shows when not “facing his toughest audiences- classrooms full of Gen Z kids,” recently posted a series of videos to his TikTok sharing a truly diabolical plan to not only use made-up “Gen Z-sounding slang words,” but “gaslighting” his students into thinking they’re real.

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