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Fatherhood

New dad shares 5 genius, but often overlooked, delivery room essentials for new parents

“After going through the process recently, these were all super helpful.”

Credit: @hellommartin on TikTok

A master class in becoming a dad.

No matter how many books you read, classes you take, or podcasts you listen to, there are some experiences that you can not prepare for.

Becoming a parent is definitely one of them.

After months of waiting—puzzling over name choices, setting up the nursery, driving to the store late at night to pick up her current craving—the day finally comes. It’s time to head to the delivery room. You’re so ecstatic, you can hardly think straight—much less pack a bag or anticipate what the mother will need postpartum. When content creator Martin (@hellommartin) shared his five game-changing hospital essentials in a video posted to TikTok, it wasn’t meant to go viral. But over 835,000 views later, it’s clear that it struck a nerve—and resonated far beyond what he expected.

@hellommartin After going through the process recently, I’ve made a list of 5 items that you may not have thought of packing in your hospital bags. These were all super helpful for us. 1. Button down shirt - easy skin to skin access 2. Baby nail file (link in bio) - avoid face scratches 3. Extra long charger - moms will be laying down for 2 days straight (at least!) 4. Comfy shoes - dads, you’ll be in your feet a lot 5. Electrolytes / water bottle - make sure to hydrate #newborn #newdad #hospitalbag #childbirth #newbornbaby #fyo #foryoupage ♬ original sound - Martin

Why? He addressed something that many face but rarely admit: Dads want to be amazing, supportive partners, but they often have no idea how to do that.

“My ex fell asleep and did not help me at all in any way. This video is so healing to me,” wrote one mother in the comments. “This is insanely good advice,” replied another.

Suddenly, Martin’s video became something much bigger than tips and tricks. It started a conversation about how fathers can step up in meaningful ways during their family’s most important moments.

5 essentials that transform good intentions into real support

What made this dad’s advice so powerful was that each item was simple. They’re every day objects—not expensive or complicated—that become incredibly thoughtful gestures for the mom. Each one addresses a specific issue he learned through experience, and forms a template for what new, nervous dads need to follow to step up and become the support partner their family needs.

clapping, woman, applause, good job, praise Good job, Martin. media4.giphy.com

A button-down shirt

“Dads, you’re going to want to pack at least one button down shirt,” Martin advises. “It’ll give you quick and easy access to do skin-to-skin with your baby,” he continues, “which is crucial for bonding with a newborn.”

It’s not a good look for new fathers to be caught fumbling with their hoodie when the nurse approaches them with their newborn ready for some all-important skin-to-skin contact time. You want to be present, ready, and solely focused on meeting your child.

dad, newborn, hospital, mom, delivery The first moment between a father and his child is so special. Photo by Devon Divine on Unsplash

The research on skin-to-skin contact between fathers and babies is clear: it helps regulate the baby’s vital signs, promotes bonding, and creates a foundation for attachment that lasts a lifetime. A button-down shirt makes this precious moment seamless instead of awkward.

Although, making a good first impression couldn’t hurt either, right?

“Maybe I’ve been on TikTok for too long, because I thought you were going to joke about looking spiffy for the baby,” teased one person.

A baby nail file

“He or she will be born with cute little fingernails, but they will be razor-sharp,” warns Martin. “You’re not able to clip their nails yet, so you can file them down so they don’t scratch or cut their faces.”

Yes, even babies have nails! Having a nail file on-hand means that you can immediately address this tiny but important need instead of feeling helpless.

An extra-long charger

Hospital outlets are random and never where you think they’ll be. Mom will want to stay connected during labor: documenting memories, updating the family, and maybe playing a little game on her phone to keep distracted during the long stretches.

dad, newborn, hospital, mom, delivery Mom shares a moment with newborn. Photo credit: Canva

A regular charger just doesn’t do the trick. Remember those people at the airport who are tethered to the wall? Don’t be that person in the delivery room. An extra-long charger means that mom can charge her device peacefully in bed, and dads can be wherever their partner requires them to be while still staying connected.

Comfortable shoes

“Labor can be a pretty intensive process, and while mom will be laying down, dads, you’ll be on your feet supporting mom most of the time,” Martin continues. The takeaway? “Make sure you wear comfy shoes.”

Labor is personal and doesn’t adhere to any single person’s schedule (other than the baby, perhaps). Mom might need to pace up and down the hospital corridors, stand for hours, or walk simply to calm the nerves. Dads should be right there with her. Comfortable shoes are about endurance—when your feet don’t hurt, you can focus on what really matters.

via GIPHY

Electrolytes

“Mom will be expending a ton of energy during labor, so she needs to stay hydrated,” he explains. “Bring a bottle with a sip top so she can drink easily while laying down.”

This tip not only keeps the mom’s physical health in mind, but also considers her comfort. Sounds like a recipe for a great start to your newborn’s journey.

What this is really about: changing the conversation

The earnest response to this video reveals something profound about modern fatherhood: dads are hungry for practical, thoughtful guidance on how to show up for their partners during birth.

Every item in Martin’s bag sends a message to his partner: “I’m in this with you, I’ve thought about what you might need. I’m ready to support you through anything.”

dad, newborn, hospital, mom, delivery Good luck to Martin and his partner on this journey!Photo credit: Canva

So, when the time comes, pack thoughtfully—because you’re not just bringing “stuff” to the hospital. You’re delivering the message that you’re ready for this scary, exciting, life-changing journey together.

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The Levi Strauss Foundation advances the human rights and well-being of underserved people in places where the company has a business presence

Community

Immigrant couples find joy with new Thanksgiving tradition

This Chinatown shop is holding space for tradition in a changing city

Photo: Jessica Shuran Yu for Documented.

David Huang, 23, and Ana Delgado, 24, are one of three couples at The One Wedding Plaza on Thanksgiving Day.

True

On Thanksgiving Day, when most Americans gather with family to reflect on and celebrate their blessings, a different kind of holiday tradition has flourished among immigrant families in recent decades: Weddings.

Both of our families are immigrants,” said Ana Delgado, whose family emigrated from Costa Rica to New York City. She and her husband, David Huang, whose family settled in Tennessee after leaving China, were married at The One Wedding Plaza on Thanksgiving Day in 2024. “We’re not super attached to the Thanksgiving [holiday],” she explained.

Thanksgiving Day weddings are especially popular among Chinese immigrants like the Huang family. Because many Chinese families in New York work in the retail, construction, or garment industries, the holiday provides a rare day off work where families and friends are available to gather. Boutiques like The One Wedding Plaza have stepped up to meet the demand, providing a one-stop shop for families looking to host a celebration. More than simply a wedding venue, boutiques like The One Wedding Plaza offer entertainment, catering arrangements, gown rentals, makeup services, and other wedding necessities.

Same Tradition, Shifting Cultures

Thanksgiving Day weddings continue to grow in popularity, but in New York City, the tradition looks different than it did pre-pandemic. Before COVID, boutiques and banquet halls in Chinatown bustled with customers, providing full wedding services for Chinese families. Now, however, much of the Chinese population in Chinatown has moved into neighboring areas like Flushing and Sunset Park, taking businesses with them. At the same time, according to reporting from Documented, an independent, non-profit newsroom dedicated to reporting with and for immigrant communities in New York City, more than one-fifth of storefronts in Chinatown have been forced to close. The result is that The One Wedding Plaza is now the last surviving full-scale wedding boutique in Chinatown—and the last remaining touchstone of the Thanksgiving Day wedding tradition for Chinatown-area families.

“This street used to be so lively,” said Jessica Liang, who works as the general manager of The One Wedding Plaza, which is located on East Broadway. At one point, she recalled, businesses along her street would be bustling with customers well into the night. Now, during the night, they’re mostly empty.

Wedding dresses at The One Wedding Plaza in Manhattan Chinatown.

Jessica Shuran Yu for Documented.

But Liang refuses to close shop. Although her locations in Flushing and Brooklyn are doing better than the Chinatown location, Liang is determined to keep the Chinatown location open to help couples like Huang and Delgado carry on meaningful family traditions and create new memories.

Blending Makeup, Blending Traditions

While the economy and the population have shifted in recent years, Thanksgiving Day Weddings are as meaningful as ever. Huang and Delgado, in fact, were so dedicated to the idea that they flew their families to New York from Tennessee in order to celebrate, as there were no banquet halls in Tennessee suitable for a Chinese wedding. The high school sweethearts were one of three couples who married at The One Wedding Plaza on Thanksgiving 2024, their celebration—a joyful mix of Mandarin, English, and Spanish cultures. Liang, in addition to acting as the Plaza’s general manager, also offered services as a makeup artist for Delgado and her bridesmaids on the big day.

Like many immigrant families, Huang and Delgado weren’t just celebrating a wedding—they were paying tribute to their respective cultures, embracing new traditions, and honoring the immigrant experience. The One Wedding Plaza made that possible not only by providing makeup services and the venue, but holding space for a celebration of heritage and community. It’s for exactly this reason that Liang is committed to keeping The One Wedding Plaza open for immigrant families in Chinatown for years to come.

This article, written by Jessica Shuran Yu, originally appeared on Documented, an independent, non-profit newsroom dedicated to reporting with and for immigrant communities in New York City. Documented’s community-driven approach to journalism and information impacts the everyday experiences of immigrants—including providing original reporting and resource guides in English, Spanish, Chinese, and Haitian Creole. Sign up for Early Arrival, Documented’s newsletter, for immigration news—docu.nyc/earlyarrival.

This article is part of Upworthy’s “The Threads Between U.S.” series that highlights what we have in common thanks to the generous support from the Levi Strauss Foundation, whose grantmaking is committed to creating a culture of belonging.

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Community

85-year-old woman in senior home brings down the house with Fleetwood Mac 'Landslide' cover

There wasn't a dry eye in the house.

Cecily Knobler

A woman sings "Landslide" by Fleetwood Mac at karaoke.

On a hot Sunday in July, Carole Wade took the mic at a Dallas senior living facility where my mom lives. I happened to be visiting for the karaoke event, and the list of residents who couldn't wait to put their stamps on their favorite tunes was so long, the event had to be extended. ABBA's "Mamma Mia," David Lee Roth's "Just a Gigolo"—you name it, they sang it.

When it was Wade's turn, the microphone was brought to her table. She took it in her hands as though it was an extension of her fingers as the music cued up. Then, as she began to effortlessly sing "Landslide" by Fleetwood Mac, the room got still. Frozen. All eyes were on her, and most of those eyes were wet. The lyrics, so beautifully fitting:

"Well, I've been afraid of changin'
'Cause I've built my life around you.
But time makes you bolder,
Even children get older,
I'm getting old too."

A man sitting at our table took notice of how emotional I had become. He leaned over to say, "Never stop feeling the music."

I had the honor of chatting with Wade, who at 85, has been singing nearly her whole life. She got started in the business as a backup singer in Elvis impersonator groups in Dallas and surrounding areas. In and out of bands, playing Deep Ellum clubs and local hotels, she shares, "I've been singing since I was a small child. I've loved music all my life."

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As luck would have it, she was at a jam session when she started harmonizing with other musicians. They would soon form her most recent band, Psychedelic Oatmeal. They officially stopped playing gigs when she was in her 70s, but they remain close. (She notes her bandmates were all much younger.)

bands, carole wade, music, old friends, singer Carole and her band mates.Carole Wade

They covered classic rock tunes from Stevie Nicks, The Eagles, Janis Joplin, and Led Zeppelin. Songs like "Me and Bobby McGee," "Seven Bridges Road," and "Whole Lotta Love." She laughs that most of the men in the band couldn't hit those Zeppelin high notes made famous by Robert Plant, so she took on the challenge—with great success.

They even branded themselves at gigs, making little Ziploc bags of oatmeal and glitter, which they would throw to the audience at shows. That is, until a club owner asked them to stop, as the oatmeal was mixing with spilled drinks, "creating goo."

Rare footage of Psychedelics Oatmeal.

The band Psychedelic Oatmeal plays in Dallas. www.youtube.com

Wade makes clear that music is her therapy. "If you're down on a certain day, it will bring you up." She has lived a full life, with two grown sons who are both excelling in life. But music, and the friends with whom she makes it, brings her that extra piece of joy and purpose.

Michael Hatcher, the Resident Services Director at The Reserve at North Dallas (the senior facility in which this event was held), has seen firsthand how music soothes seniors. It reconnects them to their purest selves, no matter how hazy their memories might become. Hatcher shares, "They remember the music, and the time. It's a vessel for anyone of age. It can be used to bring someone out of the deepest sun-downing and back to life."

A man sings "Just a Gigolo" at The Reserve karaoke day.

@cdk213
Senior living karaoke! Fabulous! #seniorlivingcommunity #justagigalo #dallas

There is much research to support this. Bannerhealth.com quotes music therapy coordinator Tammy Reiver for Banner Hospice in Phoenix: "Music holds the power to increase dopamine levels (happy hormones), decrease symptoms of depression and pain, and improve a person’s quality of life. Pleasing music plays an important role at every age, but for aging adults, the benefits are even greater.”

As for Wade? She jokes that she and a few other musicians at the senior home have plans to start their own band. She certainly has the chops for it—and the fans.

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Culture

People are obsessed with the 'Gen Z stare.' But Gen X says it all started with 'Office Space.'

Michael Bolton's legacy will not be denied.

Image via Office Space/20th Century Fox

Gen Xers argue that the "Gen Z stare" started with them and the movie 'Office Space'.

The Gen Z stare has been a hot topic recently among older generations. Gen Z, those born from 1997 to 2012, are being called out for their socially awkward "stare." However, Gen X (those born 1965 to 1980) are claiming ownership of the stare, and tying it to the classic movie Office Space, which premiered in 1999.

Over on Reddit, of member PhoneJazz shared his stance that Gen X actually originated the "Geb Z stare." "More proof that the 'Gen X stare' was a thing before the 'Gen Z stare', they wrote, with a screenshot of the film's iconic character Michael Bolton serving a stare.

The post was a humorous hit with fellow Gen Xers, with many who agreed and added their thoughts in the comments. "Gen x state is more aloof disgust, while gen z state is more not knowing where to place your eyes when not looking at an iPad. There’s less intent in a gen z stare," one wrote.

office space, michael bolton, gen x stare, gen x, gen xers Office Space Case Of The Mondays GIF Giphy

And another agreed, writing, "Except Michael here is showing disgust and contempt, it’s not the brain-is-buffering stare of Gen Z." It got a reply from another Gen Xer, who elaborated, "this is it. Z is buffering. X is calculating." And another noted, "I mean the GenZ stare always just struck me as kind of a blank 'I dunno, brain not processing' look. The GenX stare was always a 'Ima let you think about how f*ckin dumb the thing you just said to me was and give you a chance to feel stupid. Stupid.'"

Other Gen Xers agreed that the Gen X stare is not totally the same as Gen Z's, and involves a little more judgement than those given by Gen Z. Another explained, "Exactly! We give a derisive, disgusted state for a moment. The gen z stare shows a complete lack of…anything. I never knew what people were talking about bc I never witnessed it before last week," they shared, before sharing their story of experiencing a real-life Gen Z stare.

stare, blank stare, gen z stare, staring, gen z Season 1 Episode 6 GIF by The Roku Channel Giphy

"I was checking out at a store and the cashier (male) just stared and said literally nothing the entire time until he asked if I needed a bag. As I was leaving I heard him talk normally to a coworker. It was completely rude and made him seem much less than intelligent," they wrote. "If he were a server I wouldn’t tip him. It was that bad. To me all it showed was rudeness and an inability to function with the public. Glad it’s rare around here."

Other Gen Xers defended Gen Z about their stare. "In a recent NYT article, Gen Zers claimed it was because they don’t suffer fools at all, and so if they don’t want to interact with you, they just shut down, even in service positions," one wrote. Another Gen Xer added, "Aren’t we going to cut Gen Z some slack for how COVID f*cked up their education and socialization?"

gen z, gen z stare, generation z, generations, change Judging Mean Girls GIF by Magic Radio Giphy

Ultimately, Gen X seemed in agreement with owning their version of the stare and highlighting the differences. One Gen Xer perfectly summarized it: "The GenX stare is sardonic, whatever type attitude. It usually came after an interaction turned sour. The Gen Z is blank. It isn't active disdain for what a 'customer' or teacher is demanding but is a lack of emotion or awareness of interaction with a human from the start," they wrote. "It's been described as passively watching, as if the world is a video. I don't think that tracks with our generation's attitude at all."

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Golden Years

I spent a week chatting with people over 80. Here are 4 pieces of wisdom they shared.

"No one warns you how many of your new friends will pass on."

Canva

Two hands of different ages grasp one another.

There are only a few things in this life we can't evade. One of them is aging. Sure, there's Botox and facelifts and all that jazz to help us look younger. But in the end, our cells simply insist on keeping score, and no matter how hard some might fight it, our DNA is bombarded with hits that will eventually take us down.

The good news is that with years often comes wisdom. I like to think of our minds as though they were hiking trails. Each trail has a sign, but instead of telling us which way to go, the signs remind us who we are. This past week, I was honored to read some of those signs at the senior home where my mom resides. Nearly every conversation, at least for me, yielded little sage sachets of advice that are truly invaluable.

Know someone before you marry them.

A woman in her early 80s shared that it takes about a year for someone's "true nature" to be revealed, even in the most intimate of relationships. (This, at least according to a professor she had in graduate school.) In other words, she says, "A person can hide their psychological pathologies, on average, for about a year."

So, she wishes younger people would wait at least that long before moving in or getting married. "Slow down," she said. "Really take your time before you take the leap. Everyone puts their best foot forward at first and then sometimes that mask can slip. Don't get stuck."

elderly man, elderly woman, relationship, honeymoon phase A man kissing a woman near the ocean. Photo by Esther Ann on Unsplash

Some research shows that the "honeymoon phase" can, of course, vary in length. Brides.com shares, "The honeymoon phase is an early part of a couple's relationship where everything seems carefree and happy. It usually lasts from six months to two years and can be marked with lots of laughs, intimacy, and fun dates."

No matter how long that phase lasts, her advice to slow down and really get to know someone before fully committing seems like (mostly) a good idea.

Listen to your doctors

elderly man, doctor's office, health, blood pressure A doctor examining a patient's wrist with a stethoscope Photo by CDC on Unsplash

I met a woman who was a retired OBGYN. We talked at length about perimenopause, hormones, and life after 50. She urges, "Do the research, but also (for the most part) listen to your doctors. Most of them know what they're doing."

We both kind of laughed, and then she leaned in and said, "No. Really." She added, "Nothing wrong with getting a second, or even third opinion. But listen and read all you can before it's too late."

Understand that time is precious

elderly, aging, friendship, time, Two men play chess. Photo by Vlad Sargu on Unsplash

One thing my mom rather casually mentioned really stuck with me. This was how difficult it is to make new friends—and not for reasons one might think. Sure, senior living facilities can be just as cliquey as groups were in middle school. But for my mother, it was less about fitting in and more about fearing she would lose people as she grew to love them.

"No one warns you how many of your new friends will pass on. When I first moved here, I befriended a brilliantly funny woman and within six months she was gone. This happens more and more and you never get used to it. You're never prepared."

If you don't want to eat dinner at 4:30, you don't have to.

On a simpler note, this one might be obvious to some, but it was certainly a common topic among the people with whom I spoke. Even though they serve dinner at 5:00 in many senior homes, it doesn't mean you can't put it in Tupperware and save it for later. To that point, just because people age, doesn't mean they have to go to bed at 8:00 p.m. (Though for many, that timeline is just perfect.)

One man noted, "Just because we all live in one place doesn't mean we all become one person. We've got night owls and early birds and every other kind of bird you could imagine. Eat and sleep when you want to. It's still your life."

His friend added, "If you want to play Mahjong at midnight, do it!"

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Love Stories

Little girl's 'peanut butter' love song for the two boys she likes has the ultimate twist ending

“What’s a girl to do?”

Canva

Children play happily on a playground.

Kids say the darndest things and, sometimes, the "darndest things" are actual, bona fide wisdom beyond their years. When Julian Shapiro-Barnum (JSB), who hosts the popular web series Recess Therapy, seeks out these young kids for advice, he's probably always a little shocked, but never disappointed.

Based in New York City, JSB interviews kids between the ages of two and nine years old. The series resonated so sweetly with fans that The New York Times had to interview JSB, who shares, “The reason it’s called Recess Therapy is that the original idea was that I was going to bring things that I was struggling with to children and, like, get advice from them.” Per the official Recess Therapy social media pages, it's "a playground full of untrained therapists. Little kids, big questions, free advice."

One delightful year-old clip is gaining in popularity as it remakes the rounds on social media. In it, JSB asks a young girl named Zoey, "Do you know what Miles said about you recently?" Zoey beams. "He wants to marry me."

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We then cut to Miles to confirm this information. He explains, "And then I wanted to marry a NEW friend that had never been to my school named Zoey."

Back to Zoey, JSB asks, "Are you ready for that?" Zoey giggles, "I THINK." The reaction is utter shock while Zoey continues, "What's a girl to do?" She then takes a huge slurp out of her large, pink sippy cup-style water bottle.

But this takes a turn, reminiscent of cinema's best rom-coms. "There's like two people I really like," she says with a smile. JSB responds, "Oh my God, sister, what are we gonna do about it?" Zoey answers without hesitation. "Love is so confusing. It's just hard to know."

playground, chalk drawing, heart, kids, love A heart-shaped pink chalk drawing. Photo by Markus Spiske on Unsplash

What happens next is completely unexpected. JSB asks Zoey matter-of-factly, "Should we go write a love song?" "Oooh yeah!" Zoey exclaims. Cut to: They're sitting in front of a piano when JSB asks Zoey, "Okay, what's this song about?" She answers, "A flower in love with peanut butter." Move over, Taylor Swift. We've got a new romantic in town.

They both begin to play as Zoey sings, "The flower was thinking of the peanut butter. Oooh ooooh ooooh peanut butter. The peanut butter was sooooo lonely. She had somebody she liked, but didn't know which one to choose."

JSB busts in, "Peanut butter and the jelly. But which is right for me?"

Giving the microphone back to Zoey, she shocks with her final lyrics: "But the flower didn't need anybody at all. She was perfect the way she was." He and the rest of the room erupt in applause, because…it's utter genius.

But for those worried about Miles, he gets a big win too.

Recess Therapy, Rhianna , fans, kids www.youtube.com, Recess Therapy

The comment sections agree. On the Instagram reel, there are nearly half a million likes and loads of commenters. Some are merely surprised by how good it is: "Not the song slapping me left and right."

Others really relate to the lyrics: "Who hasn’t been a flower that took too long to realize they were better off without a non-committing peanut butter?"

And one person has this advice for Zoey: "Yes flower. Just keep blooming."

The YouTube comments also continue to come in every day. One person writes, "You're not allowed to be this cool at this age. It's just not fair."

The truth is, Zoey (and all the rest of the kids) are really cool. They've already rubbed elbows with tons of celebrities who are, frankly, clamoring to chat with them. In one clip, among many hilarious moments with Steve Carrell and Will Ferrell, Carell asks Zoey, "If you were invisible, what's the first thing you'd do?" Zoey answers mischievously, "I'd try to trick my mom and dad like a ghost."

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Ferrell then asks, "Zoey, what if I asked Steve if I could borrow his car and then I never gave it back?" Zoey, without giving it a second of thought, brilliantly answers, "Why can't you just take a taxi?"

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Celebrity

A surfer is using Malcom-Jamal Warner's tragic death to save others from deadly rip tides

Great advice for anyone going into the ocean this summer.

Photo credit: Canva and Sean Coon/Wikimedia

After the death of Malcom-Jamal Warner, a surfer is trying to save others,

Summertime usually means spending time near or in a body of water, which is why water safety skills are often viewed as paramount for everyone. Of course, every body of water isn't created equal; the banks of a lake are different than a pool and the beaches of the Gulf Coast are different than the beaches on the Atlantic.

There's even a difference in water behavior between the beaches on the Atlantic Ocean and those on the Pacific Ocean. That's why when it comes to water safety, it's important to take into account the type of water involved. On July 20, beloved actor Malcom-Jamal Warner died while vacationing with his family in Limon, Costa Rica. The 54-year-old was swimming at the beach when he got caught in a riptide and was unable to free himself.

Malcom-Jamal Warner; Malcom-Jamal Warner death; riptides; rip currents; rip current deaths Surfer riding waves off a tropical coast.Photo credit: Canva

An off duty lifeguard spotted Warner and began mouth to mouth in the water before performing CPR once he brought the father of one to shore. Riptides, also known as rip currents, are common in the ocean. In fact, surfers rely on riptides to help them paddle out to catch the next wave. A surfer who goes by @Kirbydotmatrix online uploaded a video expressing his sadness about Warner's passing and sharing helpful tips on what to do if you find yourself in a riptide.

If you're not familiar with the way the ocean behaves, it can mean you find yourself in a dangerous situation quickly. Approximately 100 people a year die from rip currents according to the United States Livesaving Association and, contrary to myths that may circulate, you cannot see a rip current in the water.

Malcom-Jamal Warner; Malcom-Jamal Warner death; riptides; rip currents; rip current deaths Surfer with a board, smiling by the sea.Photo credit: Canva

But if you've ever been in the ocean, even if you avoided letting the water get past your knees, you've likely experienced its powerful pull. One minute you're standing on the sand looking at your neatly laid out beach towel and family members still on the shore, and the next your family, towel, and the beach itself are suddenly further away. They haven't moved; though you thought you were standing in one spot, the pull of the ocean as rushes back out moved you yards away.

On a very small scale, you're experiencing what can happen during a rip current. When someone swims further out into the ocean, they can get caught in a riptide, which can pull them further out into the water. But instead of being able to just swim back to shore, the current's strength almost holds the person in place.

Malcom-Jamal Warner; Malcom-Jamal Warner death; riptides; rip currents; rip current deaths Family fun splashing at the beach on a sunny day!Photo credit: Canva

Kirby explains, "When a wave crashes on shore, that water has to get sucked back out into the ocean. That sucking back out into the ocean is what we call the rip current. It is the current going back into the ocean and it's not one to one." He continues, "But if you're not used to it, if you don't know what it is, if you don't know you're in it, it can be lethal as we're constantly reminded of. Because what happens is people will swim in the ocean and they think they're having a great time and then all of a sudden they're trying to swim to shore and they can't."

Being caught in a rip current can be absolutely terrifying, especially if you have no idea what's happening. But there is a way to escape a riptide and Kirby is not only giving people advice but encouraging others who participate in ocean sports to do the same.

@kirbydotmatrix Yet another Rip Current death. #malcolmjamalwarner #riptide #surfing ♬ original sound - Kirbydotmatrix

"If you're caught in a rip current, do not try to swim to shore. If you find yourself unable to swim to shore because you feel the wave catching towards you, or even worse, if you're under water and you find yourself stuck, swim parallel to the shore. You have to open your eyes, swim parallel to the shore and then go that way. You will face zero resistance going parallel unless there's some crazy south by...southwest wind or something like that. Swim close to shore...or parallel to the shore, pop your head up and if you...I swear just 25 yards tops...20 yards, you'll be out of the rip current and you'll be able to take the wave energy back to shore and be safe," Kirby advises.

The beach can be fun for family vacations, but staying aware of the signs, such as the flags raised on lifeguard towers and what the water is doing, is important for ensuring safety. As time passes since Warner's death, hopefully more people with unique experience will continue to share how to escape being caught in a rip current and other potentially lethal natural phenomena.

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New dad shares 5 genius, but often overlooked, delivery room essentials for new parents

“After going through the process recently, these were all super helpful.”